The Beauregard Thread--For Everybody Who Didn't Get A Joke

Beauregard

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Hey, on the Muppet Show record, Statler and Waldorf heckled Happy Feet, and I didn't get it.
"On the show that wasn't funny."
"Yes, but on a record, it doesn't even make any sense!"

Now, this either isn't a joke, or they mean on a record, as in, keeping track. Or something else I'm not seeing here...
Well, I think that's really a sort of inside, nudge-wink joke to the fact that on the show Kermit performs that tap-dancing number and you never see his feet (He's a puppet!) and its amazingly clever performing...on the record, its just a song. I think its less a joke and more of a, "Hey, remember how clever we were the first time?"

As for: "Fozzie Bear: That's nothing. I once waited a whole year for September. "

I'm still not sure whether he is just slow there, or whether he was making a completely dead-pan joke. Sometimes I say things like this just for the reaction, or just to make myself the center of attention during those kinds of meetings.
 

Vincent L

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Episode 213: Rudolph Nureyev
Veterinarian's Hospital

Miss Piggy: "Me thinks we should take our leave."
Dr. Bob: "Why?"
Miss Piggy: "Just look at the time"
[all looks at different parts of the room]
[laugh track]
 

Whatnot1988

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In the "Scarborough Fair" number of the Paul Simon episode, the Sherrif of Nottingham (Link) arrests Paul for "Playing a lute without a license." How could he be arrested for just playing a musical intrument?
 

Beauregard

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In the "Scarborough Fair" number of the Paul Simon episode, the Sherrif of Nottingham (Link) arrests Paul for "Playing a lute without a license." How could he be arrested for just playing a musical intrument?
I actually think you can be arrested for playing musical instruments in public without a license. I think the humour is derived from the fact that obviously back on the Robin Hood days no one would have bothered with licences for lutes.
 

Muppet fan 123

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Episode 213: Rudolph Nureyev
Veterinarian's Hospital

Miss Piggy: "Me thinks we should take our leave."
Dr. Bob: "Why?"
Miss Piggy: "Just look at the time"
[all looks at different parts of the room]
[laugh track]
(It's the Shakespeare Vetenarians Hospital Sketch)
Actually it ends like this.
Miss Piggy: Look at the time.
Dr.Bob:The time is ashrew!
Miss Piggy: Are you calling me a shrew?
Dr.Bob: If the shrew fits!
(laugh track)
 

David French

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(It's the Shakespeare Vetenarians Hospital Sketch)
Actually it ends like this.
Miss Piggy: Look at the time.
Dr.Bob:The time is ashrew!
Miss Piggy: Are you calling me a shrew?
Dr.Bob: If the shrew fits!
(laugh track)
Dr Bob's line is "Hey, the timing of the shrew."

It's a play-on-words on the Shakespeare play "The Taming of the Shrew".
 

Misskermie

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Ok, what is the joke with the pillow under Piggy's dress in the duet, "Waiting at the church"?

Because I don't get if she's supposed to be pregnant, or it's a fat joke, or what, but I don't understand why the pillow is there. Is it even a joke?
 
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