How many fics did I come up with this week? 1,0000? Anyhoot, I'm doing this, because I just remembered that Miss Piggy's birthday passed recently, according to my research. (Also according to my research, she is now 44) So, to comemorate this B-Day, I'm writing a fic that describes what happens before Piggy takes a cake to the face on AFV! YaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaY! Role the clip!!! It was a surprisingly quiet morning. Gonzo and Fozzie seemed to have gotten up earlier than all of the other Muppets. They were talking about the birthday written on the calendar. "Well, it's that time of year again." Gonzo sighed as he sipped his coffee. "Yeah, but it's not so bad, I mean... Um..." Fozzie tugged his tie. "You don't know where you're going with this do you?" Gonzo asked, chuckling "Not really. It's just that her birthday is a dangerous time of year..." Fozzie trembled. "Huh. No kiddin'?" Gonzo chuckled. At that moment, Kermit entered the room. "Hiho Gonzo! Hiho Fozzie!" Startled by Kermit, and how he was up as early as them, they replied shakily. "Hi Kermit! "Hey Kermit!" "Has anyone seen Miss Piggy?" Kermit asked, preparing his plate for breakfast. "Why? What do you have planned this year?" Fozzie asked, as a completely neutral friend. Kermit sighed, because he thought that question was an anniversary question. "We're not married! We don't have an anniversary!" Kermit's face scrunched. Gonzo and Fozzie exchanged looks. "Um, yeah, we know." Gonzo muttered. Kermit was puzzled. "If you knew, then why did you-" "Bonjour!" Kermit was interupted by Miss Piggy coming down the stairs, in an alluring, strapless, purple dress. Kermit had to admit, she looked beautiful. "Good morning Miss Piggy. You look beautiful." Kermit said, slightly blushing. "Why, thank vous Kermie!" Miss Piggy got her cup of coffee, and sat at the table next to Kermit. "Sooooo.... What are we doing?" Piggy said, tracing hearts into Kermit's chest. Kermit, being clueless, (And a little lovestruck) remains silent, but with a confused look, that could get the most distracted of people to pay attention. "What?" Miss Piggy asked. "I... I'm just wondering what you're talking about." Kermit stuttered. At first, Piggy looked angry, but then her expression eased to a small smirk of satisfaction. "Ohhhhh, Moi gets it... Vous don't want to spoil the surprise..." Miss Piggy kissed Kermit on the cheek, and left the room. Kermit, still clueless, (and a little lovestruck) stared at his friends for a second. "Um, what is she talking about?" Fozzie spit his coffee at Gonzo. "YOU DON'T KNOW?" After yelling, Fozzie look at his alien friend who was dripping with coffee. "Sorry Gonzo." "That's ok. Camilla loves the smell of coffee... more fun for me!" Gonzo chuckled a smile. Kermit shook his head. "Guys what do I not know?" "It's Piggy's birthday!" Fozzie said finally. Kermit's jaw dropped. He. bought. nothing. for. her. "I-It is? Oh no, I need to come up with something quick! I don't have anything planned, and-" "Kermit," Fozzie interupted. "We have something planned, and we'll let you take all the credit... of course... you'll have to distract her while we get it ready." Kermit lightened up. "Really? You'd do that?" Gonzo nodded. "Wow thanks you guys! Now tell me the plan..." Later that day, Kermit took Miss Piggy for a walk in the park, while Fozzie, Gonzo, and a few other Muppets got Piggy's surprise ready. Kermit was a little nervous, to be surrounded by Miss Piggy's alluring, delicate form in a deserted, but beautiful park. "So Piggy..." "Yes Kermie?" Her voice was even alluring! "Um... You like my surprise?" Kermit asked. Miss Piggy smiled warmly. "Oh yes Kermie! Yes! This park, is so beautiful! I can't believe it's been abandoned!" Piggy ran, and allowed herself to fall into a nearby flowerbed, and sneezed at the single daffodil beside her. Kermit walked over to her, and she tripped him, causing him to fall atop of her. Kermit went from his usual green, to rose red... and he kinda blended in with the roses. "Kermie, you little green flirt, you!" Piggy giggled. "W-What? I only tripped, and I-" Miss Piggy silence him with a kiss, and Kermit couldn't help but kiss back. Miss Piggy rolled over, making it Kermit's turn to be pinned in the bed of flowers. Miss Piggy carefully, one by one unbuttoned Kermit's tuxedo, and when she made it to the last button, Kermit's phone rang. Miss Piggy released her grip on him, as Kermit checked his caller ID. "Sorry, I gotta take this." Kermit breathed. Kermit answered his phone. "Ok Kermit, everything's ready! Bring her over here!" "Ok. Bye." "Piggy, come on." Kermit got up, and hoisted Piggy to her feet. She was covered in pollen. "Uh, you wanna go change first?" Piggy nodded. "As long as vous helps Moi..." Piggy smiled. kermit was rose red again. (He really was part chameleon!) And so they went home! Kermit and Piggy, now changed into a green dress, and a usual collar, were down the hall of the Statler and Waldorf Astoria. While having pleasant small talk, they heard muffled talking down the hall, but hardly payed it any mind. When they reached the last door at the end of the hall, Miss Piggy found her friends inside of a small room, surrounding a cake. "Surprise!!!" They yelled. "Aw, thank you! This is so sweet and- Ahhhhhhhhhh!" Miss Piggy slipped on the wet floor, and landed in her cake. "Oh, this is so embarrassing..." Piggy saw Pepe holding a camera. She could never relive that memory! "Gimmie that you-" Approaching Pepe closer, she stepped on rake that nocked her unconcious. "Anyone got an icepack?" Kermit asked. Ok, well, this was done out of boredom... so... if it was good, it wasn't intentionally... but if it was, LMK! LOL!