Alligator King parody with outdated detail

salemfan

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The Queen Rosie of France and her Seven Daughters

One two three four five six seven!
Said the Queen Rosie of France to her seven daughters,
"I'm feeling mighty down.
Whichever of you can cheer me up will
get to wear my crown."
The first daughter gave seven scallop shells
from the bottom of the Mediterranean Sea.
The second gave her seven statues of boys
With clocks where the stomach should be.
The third daughter gave her seven onyx
From the shiekdom of down there beneath.
The queen thought the onyx were Cocoa Puffs
and she broke off seven of her teeth.
The fourth daughter came to cheer her up
with seven Oreos.
The queen said, "I'm sorry, daughter, but since that onyx episode
I just haven't got the doze."
The fifth daughter brought the queen perfume
In seven jars of honeydew.
The queen took a whiff and she broke out in spots
'Cause it smelled like Pepe Le Pew.
The sixth daughter gave her seven diamond rings
To wear upon her toes.
The queen snagged her foot on the royal red rug
And crumpled up her nose.
The seventh daughter of the Queen Rosie of France
Was a thoughtful little whelp.
She said, "Mommy, appears to me that you could use a little help."
Said the Queen Rosie of France to her seventh daughter,
"My daughter, you win the crown.
You didn't give me cookies or muffins, but
you helped me up when I was down.
Take the crown, it's yours my daughter.
I hope you don't mind the pranks.
I got it on sale at a discount store-
Cost me all of seven francs!"
SEVEN!

What is the outdated detail in this song?
 

salemfan

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The outdated detail is that this is about the Queen of France, and France no longer has a monarch, but a president.
 

SesameMike

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Also outdated: it's my understanding that France, like the rest of the European Union, now uses Euros instead of Francs as their currency.
 

salemfan

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Has anybody noticed that I replaced, "smelled like cheap cigars" with, "smelled like Pepe Le Pew"? Can anybody guess why I changed this line?
 

ISNorden

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Pepe le Pew = oversexed skunk (lousy smell) with an exaggerated French accent/speech pattern (ethnic flavor matching the parody's flavor)...

Right?
 

salemfan

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Yes, that is right. Somebody who read this song suggested that this change was to make the song more politically correct (people may think that the line, "smelled like cheap cigars", since it refers to smoking, is politically incorrect).

BTW, an early parody I made used a king of France, but I made a version with a queen and daughters because when I noticed the king gives his fake mustache to his son, I thought I could change it to be that the queen gives her fake colored fingernails to her daughter. Many stories about men growing facial hair, I have modified to be about women painting their fingernails, because both of these are something done by only one gender in adolescence or adulthood.
 

The Count

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Not bad... But maybe it'd be better for this to go in the FanFiction section.

BTW: Answering the question posed by someone before... It's mostly true that all of the twenty-five countries that compose the European Union (France being one of them) use Euros as their monetary denomination...

Except for the United Kingdom and Denmark, they still use their particular national currencies: pounds and kronas respectively.
Hope this helps.
 

salemfan

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Did anybody else notice that the main character of this song(a Queen of France) is an outdated detail?
 
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