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Another TMS Outline--Special Guest David Bowie

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by TravellingMatt, Dec 27, 2002.

  1. TravellingMatt

    TravellingMatt New Member

    (NOTE: This will be my last outline for a couple of weeks. I'm taking a brief hiatus from actively posting due to personal reasons.)



    OPENING NUMBER: Kermit introduces the opening number after being accosted by Sam about having some culture on the show since "that weirdo" David Bowie is the guest star. Kermit promises a rendition of Aaron Copland's "Hoedown" (which, of course, is played by the Electric Mayhem).

    BACKSTAGE: Sam chastises the Mayhem for butchering Copland. Floyd insists they made it better. Miss Piggy, in the meantime, puts her crush on Kermit on hold in order to seduce David Bowie. She shows up (with her hair dyed black) and asks that the goblins take her nephews (Andy and Randy Pig) away from her. This prompts David Bowie to show up (in Jareth costume), but he doesn't take them away, rather he asks Piggy how her relatives got to be so dumb. Piggy is dumbfounded.

    GUEST STAR: David Bowie (in Jareth outfit) sings "Magic Dance" with the Muppet monsters.

    Statler: "I've been to the goblin kingdom lots of times!"

    Waldorf: "Really? Where's that?"

    Statler: "At any gathering of my in-laws!"

    Both: "DOHHHH, ho ho ho..."

    BACKSTAGE: Janice is in on the action now, trying to seduce David. She gets Hilda to make her an outfit just like Iman's (David's supermodel wife). David laughs and compliments Janice, but says that it wasn't meant to be. Floyd then shows up and adds "Darn straight!"

    SKIT: "Veterinarian's Hospital"...Dr. Bob has a new cute furry blue orderly, Grover. He helps (or rather hinders) Dr. Bob, Nurse Piggy, and Nurse Janice as they operate on Fat Blue. Grover's first lesson at the hospital: in case of extremely horrible script, do the Mexican Waiter Dance and dump salsa on Fat Blue.

    Fat Blue: "I can't believe this. Why does he ALWAYS seem to find me?!"

    UK SPOT: Gonzo leads the Muppets in a rousing chorus of "The Lumberjack Song".

    Statler: "I remember seeing a whole show devoted to cross-dressers!"

    Waldorf: "What did you think?"

    Statler: "After a few minutes it really started to DRAG!"

    TALK SPOT: Kermit talks to David about the many looks and styles he's done over his career. David uses this to segue into a performance of "Changes" with the Electric Mayhem (Zoot sax solo).

    SONG: Robin sings "Bring Back The Wonder".

    SKIT: Sam tries to bring more culture back into the show by saying that the legendary opera singer Placido Flamingo would sing an aria from Verdi's "La Traviata". However, Scooter runs onstage and tells Sam that Placido Flamingo can't make it because he posed in front of a trailer for a picture and the owners wanted him to stick around. Scooter does say there is an adequate replacement--Beaker.

    Statler: "Just leave it to Beaker to make opera even more incomprehensible."

    Waldorf: "Could be worse...it could've been the Swedish Chef!"

    (At that, the Chef pops up and clonks Waldorf over the head with a frying pan.)

    BACKSTAGE: Piggy and Janice fight over who'll join Bowie in the closing number. Kermit suggests they both do it.

    CLOSING NUMBER: David Bowie sings and plays "Modern Love" with both Miss Piggy and Janice. The rest of the Mayhem is in the background.


    Waldorf: "I never did like glam rock!"

    Statler: "That's because you were born on a slab of igneous rock!"
  2. Daffyfan4ever

    Daffyfan4ever Well-Known Member


    That's great! I loved all those cameos by the Sesame Street characters. I also liked that Hilda showed up. (Interesting seeing Caroline Rhea work with the Muppets. Lol. Just kidding. I know who you meant.) By the way, about that comment about Statler's ancestors, I've wondered whether he's married or not. I know Waldorf is married to Astoria, but I wonder about Statler because there was an episode where he was in love with Valerie Harper. Then again, in a later episode he complains about having to go home to his wife and kids. Maybe he got married and had kids after the first season or something like that. He also possibly could have been cheating on his wife with Valerie. Lol.
  3. Skeeter Muppet

    Skeeter Muppet Active Member

    Great job, Matt (as if you could do a horrible job at these)!

    Daffyfan: Actually, Matt and I are of the opinion that Statler has been married three times. His first wife died (and truly went to a better place!), his second wife divorced him, and he's currently married to his third wife.

  4. Gorgon Heap

    Gorgon Heap Active Member


    I just got it. Trailer, flamingo in front. Man, talk about me being slow on the uptake.

    Heh, now THAT'S funny!

    David "Gorgon Heap" Ebersole
  5. ryhoyarbie

    ryhoyarbie Well-Known Member

    Man I remember this years ago. This script is old man, way back in 2002.

  6. Fragglemuppet

    Fragglemuppet Well-Known Member

    Ah, so this is the famous outline! I don't remember ever seeing it before, but I like it!
  7. ElectricMayhem1

    ElectricMayhem1 Active Member

    i love this and i even love David Bowie

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