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Da Poil - a musical play

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by Winslow Leach, Jun 10, 2008.

  1. The Count

    The Count Moderator Staff Member

    Hmmm... Wonder if Milo knows as soon as he walks outta da joint, the rest of da police force's right there to slam him in cuffs again. And of cois, if da judge sees him again, it'll be moider for da little sneak-thief.

    *Masked vigilante watches the play from the vantage point afforded him thanks to the shaded rooftops. *Urges for an update.
  2. Winslow Leach

    Winslow Leach Active Member

    The front lawn of Ernest's house, a few days later.

    Corky is trying to play catch with Ernest; Corky is extremely bored and impatient, as Ernest constantly drops and misses the ball...even though the ball is large and made of rubber.

    Ernest: Oh dear, I seemed to have missed again!

    (Ernest runs for the ball; Corky sighs)

    Ernest (holding ball) Ready, Corkscrew?

    Corky (rolls his eyes) Meesh...

    (Ernest "throws" the ball...the ball winds up in the street, nowhere near Corky)

    Ernest: Oh my! The ball went into the street! What are we going to do? My mommy doesn't allow me to set foot in the street.

    (Corky slumps his shoulders, walks into the street, picks up the ball, and comes back)

    Ernest: You're so brave, Corkinator! Tssst-ssstsssst!

    A dark shadow suddenly descends...

    Ernest: I wonder who that could--

    Ernest turns around...and stares into the eyes of a crazed-looking Milo.

    Ernest: Eeep!


    Milo: Hello, boys! Bet youse didn't tink ya'd see me fer anudder six months, eh?

    Ernest: D-d-d-id they let you out for good behavior, Milie? (waves and twiddles his fingers)

    Milo: I escaped!

    Ernest: Oh dear!

    Milo: I conned da stupid guard inta lettin' me out...den when I locked him in da cell, I found an extra guard uniform in da locker...how convinient! So I put it on, even dough it was way too big fer me, and simply walked outta dere. Da other guards didn't even bat an eyelash!

    Ernest (quivering) W-w-hat are you going to do, Milie?

    Milo (rolling up his sleeves) I'm gonna make it so yer mudder won't recognize ya!

    Ernest: Oh my stars!

    (Andy pig sadly walks by)

    Andy: Hi, fellas...


    A gigantic vulture swoops down from the sky, and grabs Andy in its talons; Andy squeals...like a pig, hey!...as he is carried away.

    Milo: Whoah! What are da odds of dat happenin' twice? Ah well. Okay, melon-head, da fun's over. I'm gonna--

    Ernest and Corky are gone.

    Milo: Next time I see dat crum-bum buzzard, I'm gonna pop 'im one wit my BB gun, and celebrate Tanksgivin' oily!
  3. BeakerSqueedom

    BeakerSqueedom Active Member


    *Reads again*




    Bunsen's such a sissy! XP

    My mommy won't let me set FOOT on the street! Tsstsst! XP


    Link is such a dunce.


    LMAO! XP

    Omfgosh....I love this.

  4. Winslow Leach

    Winslow Leach Active Member

    Yes, Claudia, but what did you really think of it?:p
  5. BeakerSqueedom

    BeakerSqueedom Active Member

    ...D:...I loved it? <3

  6. Winslow Leach

    Winslow Leach Active Member

    Ernest and Corky, who have been running for their lives, stop to catch their breath in an alley.

    Ernest: Dear me. Milie seems quite upset. Do you suppose it had anything to do with us?

    (Corky: facepalm)

    Ernest: What are we going to do, Corky? We can't spend our lives running from him!

    (Corky pulls out his trusty switchblade, and smiles menacingly)

    Ernest: No, Corky, as much as Milie deserves to have some hot air let out of him, we cannot harm him. Or else we'll end up at the same place he escaped from. Oh dear. I'm so afraid! Auntie Em, I want to go home!

    (Corky decides to cheer his friend up. He pulls a sailor hat out of his back pocket, puts it on, dances, and meeps his way through "On the Good Ship Lollipop." At the end of the number, Ernest applauds)

    Ernest: Oh my! Such talent, Corky! You never cease to amaze me! (peers around corner of alley) I think we're safe. Come on!

    (As soon as Ernest steps from the alley, he bumps into a tall figure; he looks up, and stares into the eyes of Blind Pew)

    Ernest: Catch me, Corky...I'm about to...

    Pew: Pardon me, zir...do zyou know the way to Zesame Ztreet?

    (Ernest nervously points in one direction, Corky in the other)

    Pew: Zyou are two very zilly persons, zyou know zat?

    (Pew walks off in a huff)

    (Ernest walks a few steps, then falls backward into a faint; unfortunately, Corky has been watching Blind Pew walk away, and completely fails to catch Ernest; Ernest lands on the pavement. Corky turns, assuming Ernest is standing next to him; he looks around, the looks down; Corky does a double-take as he sees Ernest, passed out, on the ground. Corky sighs deeply, lifts Ernest, and carries him off)
  7. The Count

    The Count Moderator Staff Member

    Heh... Laughs at the cameo. Needs more to be posted to sate my fanfic hunger.
  8. BeakerSqueedom

    BeakerSqueedom Active Member

    HAHAHHAAA, omg...

    *Reads for the thirteenth time*


    I LOVED the references you've made of my randomity in the dorms!
    I feel as if this chapter was dedicated to me.

    PEEEWWW....! ! ! ! ! ! !


    MORE, MORE, MORE <3 !
  9. BeakerSqueedom

    BeakerSqueedom Active Member

    Auntie Em, I Wanna Go Home...xp
  10. Winslow Leach

    Winslow Leach Active Member

    Thanks, guys!:)

    Had no plan to bring Blind Pew in, but I couldn't figure out how to end the scene, so I just threw the ol' boy in there. Of course, why Pew is going to Sesame Street is a story unto itself.

    And how surreal/absurd is it for Beaker, wearing a little sailor's cap, meeping and dancing to "On the Good Ship Lollipop"?

    The effects of flat, warm orange soda are working extra hard tonight, lol!:zany:
  11. The Count

    The Count Moderator Staff Member

    Sunkist or Slice? Do they still even make those sodas? Mmm... Sunkist soda and Lymon Slice. But I owe my borg allegiance to Sprite now. *Robotic voice:Resistance is futile, obey your thirst, drink Sprite!

    And Squeedom, no going back home for you until you update your own stories. Honestly, how many times do I have to nag you before we get one of your wonderful chappies posted and story advanced to the point it can be added to the other greats in the library? Will probably have to travel to the realm of magic and borrow your fics from Carolinus's shelves of unfinished/unwritten masterpieces.
    *Pops out thanks to the dimensional warp afforded by supernatural forum powers.

    *Pops back in. Oh and Tommy? Poooooooost moooooooore!
  12. BeakerSqueedom

    BeakerSqueedom Active Member

    As soon as I clear my muselessness. ;_;
    BUT, there is a remedy...!

    Me reading Tony's stuff. XP
  13. The Count

    The Count Moderator Staff Member

    Aw... C'mon squirt. Can't you at least post the chapiter with ma doll as one of the erm, jailors, like we talked about? Pwetty pwease? With cookies 'n' cream icy cream on top?
    *Clings to Claudia begging for update.

    *Throws Tommy a muffin for carrying this on in his story.
  14. BeakerSqueedom

    BeakerSqueedom Active Member

    Okeis, okeis. <3
    Me will make chappy for you today.
  15. Winslow Leach

    Winslow Leach Active Member

    Update, update, la la la la la! Update, huh! Hit me! Yeeeeow! Sock it to me, sock it to me, sock it to me, yeah!

    Sorry...will update very soon...I'm working on a play right now, but I shall update this little...um...thingy...very soon...:D
  16. The Count

    The Count Moderator Staff Member

    Uh-oh! Tony said the S phrase... *Boxing glove springloads out from the wall, slugging the slug right in his left jaw.

    He's done... It's a KO! Hope that doesn't mean we won't get an update soonish though. Tommy... Tommy?
  17. Winslow Leach

    Winslow Leach Active Member

    So...we're probably winding down this little opus, and lemme tell ya: you've been a great audience, and I mean that. Hey, where you guys from? Hmmm? Didn't quite get that...? Oh, the shy type, huh, don't wanna talk? It's okay. So...lovely weather this time of year, huh? Monkey races will be starting soon. Those guys sure know how to run and scamper about. But I'm torn this year. Yeah, I don't know whether to put money down on Curious "Gorgeous" George or Professor Babb Oon, A.P.E. They're both considered shoo-ins this year. Ah, the dilemma on the yearly monkey race...

    By the way, did you know Elvis had a pet monkey? His name was Scatter, and E. let him run freely around Graceland. Elvis and the guys used to crack up at his antics, especially when visitors would stop by and freak out at the sight of this ravenous-looking monkey. Ah, E. was quite the card, quite the card...

    Again, you've all been a wonderful audience...and before I go, I'd like to leave you with a little something...

    (cheesily sings)

    Hey hey I'm a Monkee,
    And people say I Monkee around,
    But I'm too busy singin' (yeah!)
    To put anybody down!

    I'm just tryin' to be friendly,
    Come and watch me sing and play,

    I'm the young generation,
    And I have something to say:

    Hey hey I'm a Monkee,
    You'll never know where I'll be found (hey!)
    So you better get ready,
    I may be comin' to your toooooooown!

    Thank you, thank you, oh, you're too kind, too kind! Thank you! Thank you!
  18. Winslow Leach

    Winslow Leach Active Member

    (knocked down)

    Huh? Wha...? Who ordered the fried weasel?

    Have no fear! Milo, Ernest, Corky and the rest will be back as soon as...tomorrow!

    Can someone help me find my teeth now? 'Twas quite a mighty blow to the jaw...
  19. The Count

    The Count Moderator Staff Member

    *Picks up a set of chattering chicclets... Are these they? *Hands teeth over to Tony... Wait a sec! Youz mook... Anyone who knows anyting about da monkey races knows to put all yer nickels on Professor Bobo. He creams da competition every year... Tanks to Ms. Lawgiver. Now get outta here ya crum-bum and don't c'mback till youz has that update. *Thwacks Tony with ? cane.
  20. Winslow Leach

    Winslow Leach Active Member

    My Chicklets! I mean...my teeth! Nooooooooooooo!

    Ah well...maybe if I leave them under my pillow tonight, the Lefty-fairy will come and steal the change in my khakis...

    D'oh! I am a mook! How could I forget Bobo? Of course Pearly-vouz will make sure he wins...or else she'll have him stuffed! Or forced to listen to Brain Guy's insane ramblings about the finer points of carrying his brain around in a dish. Which is actually worse than being stuffed, methinks.

    Hey, ever wonder what would happen if Brain Guy and the head (a.k.a. Jan in the pan) from The Brain That Wouldn't Die ever hooked up? Veddy interesting...

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