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Fan Fic - And what is on the other side...?

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by Beauregard, Mar 18, 2004.

  1. Beauregard

    Beauregard Well-Known Member

    Hi! Folowing in Beth C's footsteps, I've decided to try my hand at a fan-fic myself. So here is 'And what is on the other side?'

    Rating: PG

    Story: Robin wants to know what is on the other side of the rainbow, but there's only one Muppet who knows, and he ain't talking.

    __

    Hingo! Flowing in Ceth B's smelly-sock-steppings, decided fan-fictionalisation writing a. 'Other side, on the, whataloader?'

    Ranting: GP

    Storigold: Robin rainbow colourycolours other side, what is? idn out, no talking zone...?

    *****

    And what is on the other side...?

    Gonzo ducked through the low hanging branches of the thick forest, and glanced worriedly from side to side. Any minute now the evil Comedian of Death could, and would, appear. Beside him Kermit kept his bulgy eyes firmly fixed on the other side of the trees, where the lovely Lady of Shallotte would enter.

    The gloomy glen they were stood in was wide and roomy. Above them a moon painted against the backdrop of stars glimmered and flashed warningly. “Get out, while you can,” the stars seemed to say.

    “GET OUT WHILE YOU CAN!” a loud voice boomed from the forest.

    “No way!” Kermit said. “I’m not going until the Lady of Shallotte is by my side.” Kermit raised his sward and it reflected the light in bright flashes.

    “Oh Kermie! I mean, Oh Lancelot!” said Miss Piggy. “How romantic. Voi, saving moi!”

    “I thought Annie was the Lady of Shallotte,” Gonzo said, in an aside to Kermit.

    “Obviously not,” Kermit whispered back. “My lady,” he said, bowing low. “We should leave these demented woods.”

    “NOT SO FAST!” came the booming voice again. “I, FOZZWACKA, THE EVIL COMEDIAN OF DEATH WILL NEVER LET YOU GO!” Fozzie entered the stage, dressed in a long black cloak, and a wide brimmed hat. “The Pig Porky will stay here with me.”

    Miss Piggy drew herself up to her fullest height. “I shall never marry you!” she said.

    “I never asked you to,” Fozzie replied. “Ah, wocka, wocka. You are obviously thinking along the same lines as me though. Now will you marry me?”

    “I already saod ‘No!’ dumb, dumb.”

    Kermit’s, or rather, Lancelot’s sward flashed through the air, and Fozzie jumped back, tripping and falling onto the stage floor.

    Everyone in the audience leaned forward and took a deep breath. What would happen now? Even Stadler and Waldorf were entranced by the show.

    Then there was another booming sound. “AR-HOOOOO!” It came from off stage, where Beauregard had let go of a rope, to blow his nose. Unfortunately, the rope he had been, up until that point, holding was attached to a large backdrop at the back of the stage.

    The result was that just as Lancelot and the Comedian of Death, slammed their large, but fake, swards together, a backdrop of a mid-city flower-garden fell from above, in turn knocking over one of the large forest Set-Pieces, which colapsed forward, knocking down the smaller tree set-pieces, which knocked Gonzo into Kermit, who fell against Fozzie, who tripped and fell against Miss Piggy knocking her off the edge of the stage, into the band-pit.

    As she landed on Ralph’s piano, it shattered beneath her bulk, and one of the keys hit into the cymbal, which made Animal jump backwards, knocking the saxophone flying from Zoot’s fingers, out into the front row of the crowd.

    As happens, this particular night, an old lady was sat knitting in the front row, and she was knocked over backwards as the sax hit her. The only problem (or rather, one of many problems) was that as she fell backwards, her chair went with her, and her chair was attached to the chairs on either side so those tipped over too…

    And so from one sneeze backstage, within seconds the compete and entire audience lying on its back, covered in chairs and kicking its collective feet in the air, as the various audience members struggled to get up. In fact, the only people still upright were Stadler and Waldorf.

    “Well, Waldorf,” Stadler said. “I said this show was going down hill.”

    “Doh! Ho! Ho! Ho!”

    *****

    LATER….

    “Uncle Kermit, Uncle Kermit.”

    Kermit gave his young nephew a weary smile, and shifted his weight from one foot to another. “Not now Robin.”

    “But Uncle Kermit, I wanted…”

    “I said not now. Can’t you see I’m busy? I’ve got an angry pig, a gleeful whatever, an upset bear, and a mad audience to deal with this evening.” Kermit shook his head and picked up the phone. Beep. Beep. Beep. He quickly dialled in the numbers. “Er, hi, is that Miss Snaperwhip? Yeah, yeah, this is Kermit the Frog, I was just calling to say how sorry I am that….Yeah, I know, but it wasn’t my fault it….yeah, ok then. See you agai-“

    Kermit sighed. “She hung up on me. They’ve all done that so far.”

    “Kermit, can I talk to you now?

    “No, Robin. I told you, I’m busy.”

    Beep. Beep. Beep. “Hello Dame Lynda? No, DAME Lynda. Hello? Hello?”

    Robin wrinkled up his face, and walked away. Why couldn’t his uncle give him just a few mintues. He just had one question. Maybe Piggy would know…

    *****

    Miss Piggy’s door was covered in pink hearts, and yellow stars. Robin approached it nervously and tapped twice. From inside he heard a sound of something, or someone, tripping onto the floor, and then, “I’m very mad at the moment, whoever that is, do not mess with me.”

    “Ok. I’ll go away then.”

    “Wait! Kermie!” There was a multiplicity of bolts undone and then the door opened, to reveal Miss Piggy, her hair was a bit of a mess, but other than that, you wouldn’t have known she had been brained by a stage tree, and fallen into the orchestra-pit. “Kerm--- Robin?”

    “Hi Piggy.”

    “But, but, I thought you were Kermit.”

    “Oh, sorry. I guess my voice is changing as I get older.” Robin gave a half laugh. “Anyway, I wanted to ask you, what is…?”

    Miss Piggy interrupted him, by looked conspiratly up and down the hallway, and then leaning close. “Robin, honey, can you do something for me?”

    “Sure, Miss Piggy, but I wanted…”

    “Ok. Go to your uncle and tell him that I am veeeery angry. And that you think a little dinner would calm me, and make everything triddly-how again.”

    “Can you just answer….” The door slammed shut. “…my question?” Robin finished. “No. Maybe not.”

    *****

    Camilla nodded her beaked head up and down, as she listened to Gonzo. “Burk, burc.”

    “No, no,” Gonzo said. “It was a tree. Can you imagine that?”

    It was much later now, and they had all returned home to the boarding house. In the corner Rowlf was tinkling out a little melody on a piano. Bunsen and Beaker were down in the laboratory, evidenced by the wisps of red smoke flowing up through the floorboards of the living room.

    Sam was in his room, Gonzo was talking, Fozzie was trying to find some good First Aid jokes for his next routine. Floyd and Janice were busy. Animal was practising his drums with Dr Teeth, and Scooter was away at his uncle’s. There was no one for Robin to talk to at the moment.

    He sighed deeply, and sat down on the sofa and flicked through the television channels. Nothing on worth watching. The channel had decided not to air that night’s show.

    After a few minutes Rowlf joined him on the sofa. “What’s up little fella?” he asked. “You’re looking very green tonight.”

    “Yeah,” Robin said. “I’ve got this question, but no one’s listening to me.”

    Rowlf scratched one floppy ear. “I’m listening,” he said. “What’s the question?”

    “Well. I was watching our Muppet Movie again, and I was wonderin’. What is on the other side?”

    “The other side?”

    “Of the rainbow. You know, ‘why are there so many song about rainbows, and what’s on the other side?’”

    “Oh. That.”

    Robin looked around the room, and then his attention refocused on Rowlf. “Well?”

    Rowlf crossed his legs, and leant back against eh back of the sofa. “It’s kind of hard to answer, you know.”

    “Why?”

    “Because, Robin, I don’t know.”

    Robin was amazed, and said so. “Wow. I’m amazed. I thought, with you being the oldest Muppet and all…”

    Rowlf shook his head. “Nope,” he said. “I really don’t know. But I know someone who does.”

    “Really? Who? How?”

    “How does he know?” Rowlf said. “Because, little Robin, he’s been there.”

    TO BE CONTINUED...

    (*)(*)(*)

    Feedback please:

    __

    Foodfeeder Porfavor:
  2. SarahFraggle

    SarahFraggle New Member

    go ahead Beau finish it I want to hear the rest of it. :D
  3. HeraLirambar

    HeraLirambar New Member

    "Evil Comedian of Death!" That's beautiful!
    More, please!!!
    :boo: wait, that's not right-
    :excited:
    Okay better.
  4. Beauregard

    Beauregard Well-Known Member

    I'll put some more up, probably tonight.

    __

    Tonight late staryskyclappers, put up with it....properlubrium.
  5. HeraLirambar

    HeraLirambar New Member

    Yay! Can't wait! :)
  6. Beauregard

    Beauregard Well-Known Member

    Wait no more

    __

    Wait zip, zero, little time...

    (*)(*)(*)(*)​


    Beauregard walked along the dark back ally, kicking an empty beer can in front of him. “Great, just great,” he thought. “This time I’ve really messed up.”

    Kermit hadn’t spoken to him since the ‘incident’ back-stage, and everyone seemed to be avoiding him back at the boarding house. A light drizzle pored from the cloudy sky, and his brown fur stuck to his skin.

    Some life he had out here. Some Rainbow Connection. Not.

    He kicked the beer can hard and it bounced along the street, clanging against a metal trashcan. Beau bent down and picked the beer can up. “Who leaves this junk around?” he asked no one in particular. “Well, I guess I’d better get used to it. Once Kermit sacks me, I’ll have to get some kind of job. Maybe a road sweeper would do.”

    He opened the lid of the trashcan and tossed it inside. “Hey!” said a voice from inside. “What’s the big idea?”

    “Oscar?” Beau asked, leaning over and taking a look in the trashcan.

    “Who else would be living in a trashcan?” Oscar asked.

    “I don’t know…I guess. I just thought, you’d be on Sesame Seed Street.”

    “What me? On my day off? Nah, I come up here to my holiday home in the big city.”

    “I see. I’m sorry I disturbed you.”

    “You kidding? Disturbances make my grumpy, and I LOVE to be grumpy. Right?”

    “Sure. Yeah. Sorry anyway.”

    “Well. Good day to you too,” Oscar said, and he disappeared back inside, slamming the lid down with a resounding crash.

    Beauregard wondered away. “So, did I make him happy or sad?” he asked himself. “And who cares any way?”

    Beauregard turned at the sound of a patter of feet. A small green frog was hurrying after him. “Wait up, Mr Beauregard. Hang on a second.”

    “Robin Frog? Shouldn’t you be back at the boarding house?”

    “Yeah, but Rowlf said he thought you’d come back to the theatre, and you weren’t there, so I was heading back home, and then I saw you talking to a trashcan.”

    “You were looking for me? Why would you do that?”

    “Because,” Robin said, slowing down and stopping beside him. “Because, you have the answer to one of my big questions.”

    “Questions? A test? I’m not good at tests.

    “It’s not a test, Mr Beauregard, just a little big question.”

    “What question?” Beau asked.

    Robin was panting from his little run. “I want to know,” he said, between breaths, “what is on the other side of the rainbow.”

    Beauregard sighed and looked at the floor. A thin trickle of sleek rain flowed along the middle of the street. He sighed again. “Robin, little guy, I’m sorry, but I can’t even remember what’s on the other side. I’ve been here too long. And now….I don’t think they’d ever let me go back.”

    Robin looked nearly as sad as Beau. “Why not?” he asked, in a small whisper.

    “Because,” Beau said, “I’ve messed up big time now.”

    *****​

    The classy clientele of the supposedly-expensive restaurant weaved and danced around the room, as the glistening chandeliers and disco balls reflected and refracted the light into all corners of the room. Miss Piggy sat opposite Kermit, and drank from a glass of ‘champagne’. “Isn’t it a lovely evening, Kermie. Everything is so, triddly-how.”

    “Yeah, I guess,” Kermit said, taking a spoonful of strawberry jam and spreading it across the yellow scone on his plate.

    “Oh Kermie. You look preoccupied. What’s up with vous?”

    Kermit shrugged, and set his knife back down on the white silk tablecloth. “I’m a bit worried about Beau.”

    “Me? Voi is worried about moi?”

    “No, no. Not You. Beau.”

    “Oh. Him.”

    “Yeah. Him.”

    Piggy frowned. “Why would you worry about him? He ruined our show tonight. And just when it was getting, oh, dramatic, and Romantic.” Piggy’s gaze flickered away from Kermit, as if she was looking at a distant memory, and then she leant closer to him and took his had. “What was your lie again?”

    Kermit scrunched up his face. “Piggy!”

    “Oh. I’m sorry, Kerm-ie. So, tell me, why are you worried about Beau?”

    “I don’t know, I guess,” Kermit replied. “I just didn’t get a chance to talk to him after the show. I was so busy calling angry audience members.”

    “But why would you talk to him anyway, the little creep?”

    “Because, Piggy, he’s probably worried that I’m going to be mad with him.”

    “Sure. But you are, right?”

    Kermit shrugged. “I don’t know,” he said. “I don’t know weather I can be mad, when he’s so, so sad.”

    *****​

    Beauregard sat on the edge of his bed, and dried his head with a towel. Rain, rain, go away…

    Robin was sat in front of his on a stool. He was looking up at Beau with an excited gleam in his eye. “Can you tell me more about it?” he asked.

    Beau shook his head. “It’s not something I like to talk about, Robin.”

    “But it’s your home, isn’t it? I don’t understand, but, but I want to understand.”

    “It, was, my home. It isn’t my home any more.” Beauregard lay back on the bed and looked up at the ceiling, hoping that Robin would just go away. He didn’t want to talk to anyone at the moment. Certainly not Robin. And not about his home.

    Robin walked around the bed, and hopped up on. “Please,” he said.

    “Please what.”

    “Please tell me.”

    “No.”

    Beauregard turned over away from Robin, but he circled him and sat down in front of his face.

    “Please.”

    Beauregard sat up. “No! I can’t, don’t want to talk about it.”

    “Why not?” Robin asked. He sounded near tears. All he wanted was a straight answer.

    “Because I don’t belong there. And I can’t even really remember it any more. Ok? I can’t go back, so why should I think abou’d it?”

    “Thanks,” Robin said, hopping off the bed. “That’s all I needed to know.” He gave Beau a smile, and hopped out of the room, and headed downstairs.

    In the living room Rowlf was at the piano again. Robin stopped beside him, and Rowlf turned round. “Well?” Rowlf asked.

    “Well nothin’. He won’t talk about it.”

    “Why not?”

    Robin didn’t answer at first, and then he said, “I don’t know exactly. But, I am going to find out.”


    :sympathy: :sympathy: :sympathy: :sympathy: :sympathy:

    To be continued...

    __

    Continuing neartimeforasstickerload...
  7. Whatever

    Whatever Active Member

    I love it! You're a fabulous writer! You do have a fixtation on Beau and Oscar talking, don't you? Seems like that happened in the Muppet diary role play...
  8. Beauregard

    Beauregard Well-Known Member

    Yeah, I guess.

    Anyway, I'll post some more sometime, probably not till Sunday afternoon now...Have to go out all tomorrow. (And I have to write some more...)

    Annnyway, I'd better get on with something...
  9. HeraLirambar

    HeraLirambar New Member

    Ooh, the suspense is killing me! *Countsdown to Sunday*
  10. Beauregard

    Beauregard Well-Known Member

    Ok, ok, I know I said Sunday, but I just sat down at wrote section 4, which frees me up to post part 3 today.

    Here is:

    (*)(*)(*)


    Beauregard sat at the little wooden desk in his bedroom, and opened the drawer that hadn’t been opened for many years. It stuck, and creaked as he pulled it open. Finally it popped out completely and fell from his grasp onto the floor, spreading small, leather-bound diaries in all directions.

    Beauregard quickly swept them together in his arms and shoved them all under his fluffy pillows. Then he put the drawer back, locked his door, and climbed into bed with his lamp on. It would take him a while to read through them all….

    Dear Diary,

    Wow. It’s been a great day today. Up early and out of bed in time for waffles and syrup for breakfast. Gosh, it’s great having the summer holidays in the summer, because here everyday is summer.

    Today me and dad are going fishing in the orange lake. Maybe we’ll catch something large and hairy for supper. Yum! Hope Mum’s ready for us, we’ll be back in no time, and there’ll be plenty of hairy fish to gut and cook. Whoopie!

    Beauregard


    Beauregard’s eyes teared as he read that diary entry. Not because it was sad, it wasn’t, but because he knew what was coming next.


    Dear Diary,

    I’m worried. I can’t find dad anywhere. I asked Mum and she said she hadn’t a clue where he was. I said we were going fishing and she said, “Not anymore son.” Where is he? Is he hiding from me?

    Beauregard

    __

    Dear Dear Diary,

    What does Grow mean? I overheard Mum talking. She said to Miss Nancy that Dad and her had argued because he wanted me to grow. Now he’s gone. Is that my fault?

    Beauregard

    __

    Dear Diary,

    Yes, it’s me again. I have another question, not that you can answer it, since you’re, well, a diary, and don’t have answers. What is “Outside World?” And what is a Rainbow? And where is dad? Mum told Miss Nancy that dad had gone to Outside World through the Rainbow. What was she talking about?

    Beau

    __

    Diary Notes:

    It’s been what seems like forever dad left, but I don’t know exactly how long that is, since we don’t have any way to measure time, do we? Anyway. Today, he came back and, well, he just came back, but he seems wrong somehow. Do you know what I mean?

    He has suddenly got grey hair. Strange, isn’t it. And he walks with a stick. Mum wasn’t pleased to see him, and neither was the town council. They say he’s “Let them down, and broken all the rules.”

    Weird, isn’t it?

    Beau

    __

    Dear Diary,

    Dad was talking to me this evening. He told me that I have to leave this town. I don’t know why myself, but he says that the reason is that if I don’t I will always be a child and never be a man like him. Why would I want to be?

    Anyway, he told me that the only way to get out of this land beyond the Rainbow is to break through the dark indigo of our cloudless sky. How I’ll do that, I don’t know, and why?

    Beauregard.

    __

    Diary Notes:

    Tonight is the night. Over the last few, well, ages, I’ve been building a contraption that will send me into the sky, if I fall down I might die, but I have to get out of here. Right?

    I need to know what’s on the other side of the Rainbow.

    Whatever a Rainbow is….

    Beauregard

    *****

    Robin climbed out of his bed, and pulled a rucksack down from his bedside shelf. Inside was pretty much everything he would need: flashlight, notebook, camera (Gonzo’s), Food (stolen from the Chef’s kitchen), and lots and lots of chocolate.

    Only one thing more to do…

    Robin slipped the rucksack onto his shoulders and snuck down the stairway, through the living room, and down into Bunsen and Beaker’s Laboratory. He wasn’t sure if it was a good idea to be in there, on his own, but this was something that had to be done.

    He walked past the bubbling and steamy potions, and pulled the thick index book off of one of the cluttered shelves. He opened it, and ran his finger down the page.

    “1. Apple-into-apple pie-mobile. 2. Awful-smell-creator. 3. Azzwazzwerbingo.”

    Robin turned the page. “None of those,” he said.

    “7. Banana-sketch-ruiner (broken). 8. Baskerville-hound-transporter. 12. Broken-toy-mender.”

    “Nope. None of them either.” Robin skipped through to the middle of the book.

    “31. Micro-shrinker. 32. McDonald-milkshake-into-cottage cheese.” He skipped a few more pages. “50. Paper clips, edible.” Another couple of pages. “66. Rainbow maker.”

    “Yes!” Robin said. This was what he was looking for. He checked the cupboard number. “Cupboard 345, drawer, down-a-bit.”

    Robin ran across the room to the library of cupboards. “443, 344, 345! Yes!”

    He pulled the cupboard open and rummaged through old chicken feathers, a large lump of heard cheese, several socks, and an old sticky sweat, until he found a small round device marked, “Do not use.”

    He pressed the large red button on one side, and a rainbow appeared, starting at the round device, and ending on the floor nearby.

    “Great!” Robin said. “Now, all I have to do is jump through.”

    He closed his eyes. Held his breath, and dived through the rainbow, disappearing in a glisten of colours and shapes into nothingness.

    And just after he disappeared, the device shivered, shook, and then exploded.


    TO BE CONTINUED....
  11. Beth C

    Beth C Active Member

    All I can say is.. Wow.

    Great job Beau! I'm glad I'm not the only one posting now. I didn't see much fan fic and that is one reason I started posting my story.

    But yours is great too.. you really have a talent for it and I LOVE Robin!!!

    Very well done, I can't wait for more!

    ~Beth C
  12. SarahFraggle

    SarahFraggle New Member

    wonderful Beau excellant!!!! :D :excited: :)
  13. Beauregard

    Beauregard Well-Known Member

    Hey, thanks.
  14. Beauregard

    Beauregard Well-Known Member

    Part four for your reading:

    __

    Part fourty river-reeds would you please:

    (*)(*)(*)(*)


    FOUR YEAR’S BEFORE THE BEGINING OF THIS STORY

    “But can it be done?” Beauregard asked.

    Beaker tut-tutted, meeped a couple of times, and walked around the edge of the Muppet’s Lab’s desk. “Meep, meeper, meep, meepy,” he said.

    Beauregard sighed, and folded up the diagrams he had laid out on the desk. It was so simple. Why couldn’t Beaker do it for him? After all, he could make edible paper-clips, and turn gold into cottage-cheese. Why not this?

    “Meeper, meep, meepy.”

    “Yeah, yeah,” Beau said. “You already said that.”

    Beaker pointed at one of the tubes of steamy bubbling red liquid. “Meepy, meeper, mou.”

    “Yes, but why not this?”

    “Meep, meepyous.”

    “To dangerous?”

    “Meep!”

    “Oh well,” Beauregard sighed and looked down at the dusty floor. It was covered in little black hole from acidic spillages. “But Beaker, I have to. Please, can’t you try?”

    “Moop.”

    Beauregard kicked the desk with his foot, and then hopped up and down. “Ow, ow, ow…” he said, and Beaker laughed.

    “That’s all I’m good at, isn’t it?” Beau said aloud without meaning to, “Making people laugh at how stupid I am.” He thumped his fist down on the folded diagrams.

    “Fine,” he said. “If you won’t help, Beaker, I’ll take it to the top.”

    *****

    “Excuse me Kermit.”

    Kermit looked up from the weekly report he was working on. “Yes, Beau. What can I do for you?”

    Beauregard gulped. “I work hard, right?”

    “Er, yeah. Is that all, because I’m kind’a busy…?” Kermit indicated the pile of props he had to put away, the report he had to write out for his brother, (Robin’s father), and the menu he had to go through for the dinner he had reluctantly agreed to go to with Piggy.

    “Oh. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to disturb you.”

    Kermit turned back to the report. “No, no. It’s fine. I don’t mind…”

    “Ok then. Can you do me a favour?”

    “What?” Kermit looked back up. “Beau? Are you still here?”

    “Yeah, I thought you said…?”

    “Er, yes, but I didn’t mean it. Can you go ask someone else? As I said, I’m busy, and you, listen, Beau, you’re not even a star. You’re just a stage hand. I have enough on my plate with Piggy, at the moment.”

    Beau’s face fell. “Ok,” he said. “No problem. I’ll just…go away. Thanks for your time.” He turned and wondered away from the desk, the diagrams slipping from his brown paws onto the floor.

    A few minutes later, Beaker walked through the backstage. He stepped on the diagram rolls, and looked down. “Meeep, meeper,” he said, and picked them up. He stuffed them into the pocket of his lab coat and walked off.

    *****

    Bunsen fixed the spinning plate to the back of the rotating disk, and slotted the cheese grater into place. “Er, yes, Beaker, what can I do for you? Can you pass me the thingamyjig?”

    “Meeper, mop, meepy.”

    “No, not that one, the other one, thanks. Sorry, what was that? Did you say, ‘Beauregard?’ What about him?”

    Beaker nodded that yes, he had said ‘Beauregard’, and then passed Bunsen the double barrelled riffle with the knife and fork twisted around its handle. He preferred not to ask what such things were used for. “Meeping meeps,” he said.

    “Upset? Oh dear. Hey, Beeks, could you hand me that Grease? No, no, the movie, yes that’s it, thanks.”

    Beaker handed him a copy of Grease, and Bunsen started pulling the tape out from inside, wrapping it around his new devise to hold it together. “Meep, meep, meep, mee, mee, mou, mee, meep, mou, mou, mee.”

    “I’m sorry to hear that, so you couldn’t do it.”

    Beaker shook his head sadly. “Meep, meep, mou.”

    “Never mind. Hand me the rag. Thank you.” Bunsen wiped his fingers, and walked around to the front of the engine. “Hand me that banana.”

    “Meep mee?”

    “What for? I’m going to eat it you stupid assistant.”

    “Meep, meep, meeeee.”

    “I see.” Bunsen bent over and stuck his head under the machine. “Hand me the wire, Beaker. Did you say you still have his diagrams?”

    “Meep, meep.” Beaker pulled the rolls out of his pocket, and handed them to Bunsen.

    Bunsen took his head out from under the machine, and looked over them. “Not too bad,” he said. “Pretty good drawings. Just needs changing, here, here, and here, oh and here, there, and over there.” Bunsen sat down and started scribbling furiously on Beauregard’s design. “A little tweak there, and a fiddle that round there, and bingo!” He handed the papers back to Beaker.

    “Meep! Meep!”

    “Yes, of course that would work. Now where’s that wire? Oh there. Would you plug this wire into the plug?”

    Bunsen handed the banana to Beaker instead of the wire by mistake, then he took a bite, out of the wire. “Chewy banana this,” he said, as Beaker plugged the actual banana into the socket.

    There was a loud bang and the smell of banana fritters, and smoke filled the Muppet Lab.

    “Oh well,” Bunsen could be heard saying over Beaker’s coughs. “At least we now know that bananas make excellent electricity conductors.”

    *****

    Beauregard sat on the rough wooden porch of the Muppet Boarding House with his head in his hands. So far, nothing had gone right. Would it ever? He had no idea…
  15. Party_Animal

    Party_Animal New Member

    wonderful, I seem to be repeating myself though I can't seem to think of anything else. :excited:
  16. SarahFraggle

    SarahFraggle New Member

    I'm sorry that was me, I wasn't paying attention and used my sisters name. :o
  17. Beth C

    Beth C Active Member

    *Falls down on floor laughing*

    *Reads the part about Beaker and the banana again*

    *Laughs again and falls off chair*

    Oh man, this is exactly what I needed today. My daughter is going to LOVE this part. She's got like 4 stuffed Beakers already.

    Wonderful job, keep the story coming. I canit wait to read more.

    ~Beth C
  18. Beauregard

    Beauregard Well-Known Member

    Hey thanks. I have to write some more though....

    Hopefully I'll get some more done this afternoon.

    Not sure exactly where this is going though.....
  19. Beauregard

    Beauregard Well-Known Member

    Still, FOUR YEARS AGO

    *****​

    “Meep, meep, mou!”

    “Do what?” Beau asked.

    “Meep, meep, mou!”

    “Oh, come with you. Why?”

    “Meeping!”

    “Show me something? O-K.”

    Beauregard put down the hammer, and gave a quick wave to the lady in charge of finishing the changes to the boarding house, before following Beaker through the rubbish filled front room, and down to the all-finished lab located underground, in the old basement.

    “Why, Mr Beauregard, sir. I’m so glad you came,” Bunsen said, coming towards him with an outstretched hand. “With just a little tiny few changes to your diagrams and we have created a marvellous Rainbow maker.”

    Beauregard’s lower jaw hit the floor. “You actually built my rainbow maker?”

    “Oh, yes indeed, but I don’t know that it is entirely safe.”

    “But, but, but…”

    “Still, we can certainly show you. Just press this red button on the top of the spherical gadget, and poof instant rainbow, and, most importantly, there is not a drop of rain! Go ahead, and press it.”

    Beauregard hung back a second and then extended his brown paw. He let it hover above the red button as if touching it would suddenly prove that it was just a dream, and not real. But it was. Beauregard slammed his paw down hard on the button, and a huge graceful arch of a rainbow bloomed through the air.

    Beauregard stepped back and stared with awe at the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. And then, before he could change his mind, he took a running leap and threw himself into the rainbow disappearing with a sparkle of colours and shapes.

    *****​

    Mrs Nancy stood with her hands on her pink hips, and looked up at the indigo sky. “You’re such an old fool,” she said in her cranky voice. “No one is going to fall out of the sky.”

    Mr Regard squinted against the violet sun, and had to agree with Mrs Nancy, yet he had felt so sure that the sky was giving him a message. Mrs Regard, threw him a look that told him everything, and then she turned on her heal and marched away followed by Mrs Nancy.

    “Oh dear,” Mr Regard said, running a paw through his thick bard, and leaning on his wooden stick. “I guess, life goes on.”

    Then he heard a sound like a huge piece of paper being ripped across the middle, and a dark shape covered the sun, before bursting through and falling towards the ground. Finally he could make out the brown shape as being Beauregard. His son was back.

    Beauregard fell from the sky and hit into a thick patch of grass in the meadow. He looked up dazedly and his eyes tried to focus on the picture of his father hovering over him. “Gonzo,” Beauregard said, “Would have loved that.”

    Then he passed out.

    Later, Beauregard, Mr Regard, and Mrs Regard were sat in front of a fast burning wood fire. Mrs Regard was ignoring Mr Regard, but he didn’t care, he was so intent on talking to Beau.

    “Tell me,” he said. “Have you enjoyed being out there?”

    “Oh yes,” Beau said. “I’m in show business, and…”

    The living room door slammed open and Mrs Nancy stood silhouetted against the outside sun. Her face was covered in a vicious glare, and her eyes were flashing. “Indeed you are,” she said. “So, I have seen.”

    “You?!” Mr Regard said, jumping up from the chair, and propelling himself across the room towards him with his stick. “What are you doing here?”

    Mrs Nancy pushed past him, shoving him out of the way with a flick of her pink wrist. “I’m not talking to you,” she said, and she gave Beau a thick sarcastic smile. “I’m talking to him.” She pointed at him with a red fingernail. “The big failure of Raenbu.”

    Beauregard tired to speak, but no words came out. Mr Regard positioned himself between the two of them. “What are you saying, Mrs Nancy?” he asked.

    Her gaze struck deep into him. “I thought I said…”

    “I don’t care,” Mr Regard shouted. “IF you have something against my son, you take it up with ME!”

    “Beautinglroth,” Mrs Nancy said, addressing him. “Is it not true that your father, Mr Tinglroth, served on the Raenbu council before me?”

    “Yes, he was very powerful in Raenbu.”

    “And are you not aware that I replaced him a long, long time ago?”

    “Yes.”

    “And are you or are you not aware that I am even more powerful than he was?”

    As Mr Beautinglroth Regard looked into Mrs Nancy’s red-lined eyes, he realised that she wasn’t going to budge an inch. She obviously had something against Beauregard, and trying to stop her wouldn’t help.

    “Beauregard!” Mrs Nancy said, turning back to him. “Is it not true that where you live now, everyone laughs at you all the time?”

    “Not all the time…”

    “And am I right in thinking that you had a hugely exciting part in The Great Muppet Caper?”

    “Well, I…”

    “I thought you played a dumb, thick, dense, unintelligent, dim, brainless, dull, stupid taxi driver? Is that true?”

    “I…guess….”

    “And did you not get laughed at because of your stupidly stupid little ‘red-hand’ jokes?”

    “Yes….”

    “Well then, because you have left our town, and because you have not proven yourself worthy of being out there while you were gone, you are being sent by the council back to the other side of the rainbow, and if you ever, ever, ever, set paw in Raenbu again until you have proven yourself worthy to come back, we will KILL YOU!” Mrs Nancy was getting angrier, and angrier, and her last few words left her mouth with drops of spittle that plopped against the stone floor of the house.

    Beau looked from Mr Regard, to Mrs Nancy, and then to his mother who returned his gaze without blinking. “Do you really want me to go?” he asked.

    “YES!” Mrs Nancy screamed.

    “Yes,” his mother said. “Until you prove yourself.”

    “Noo!” Beau’s father shouted, but then the council guards burst into the house…

    *****​

    A long time later (at least, to Mr Regard it seemed a long time, but it could have been days or years, no one could tell in Raenbu) Mr Beautinglroth Regard stood staring up at the indigo sky, hoping, wishing, somehow praying that his son would return. One day Beauregard would prove himself worthy. He must. And then he could come back to Raenbu, where he belonged.

    It was just then that there was a sound of ripping, and a small green frog fell out of the sky landing onto of Mr Regard. As the two struggled to there feet, Robin grinned.

    “Gonzo,” he said, “Would have loved that.”

    TO BE CONTINUED...
  20. Party_Animal

    Party_Animal New Member

    Fantastic! :D
    hehehe. Great stuff. :crazy:


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