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FanFic: The Bonds of Family

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by ReneeLouvier, Mar 16, 2006.

  1. Leyla

    Leyla Member

    (Checks back in the thread)

    Nuh uh! I meant you!!! :) Really!
  2. ReneeLouvier

    ReneeLouvier Active Member

    oh, cool. I keep thinking this is Beths' story for some reason!!
  3. ReneeLouvier

    ReneeLouvier Active Member

    Chapter Fifteen

    The car pulled up to the coffeehouse, and Sara and Scooter both stepped out. They found a corner of the shoppe near the counter, and away from most of the human and muppet patrons. Where they could have a little privacy to themselves. The owner, Jim came over and handed them two cups of coffee, and smiled.

    "Been a long time since I've seen you Sara." Jim stated, grabbing a chair. Sara smiled weakly, and turned her attention to her coffee cup, as she added some cream to it.

    "Yeah...it has been awhile, hasn't it Jim?" She said plainly, as he smiled again, and left a black pot of coffee for the two of them on the table. Then he left them alone to themselves.

    "It's been awhile? What is he talking about, Sara?" Scooter asked, sipping his black coffee. Sara raised an eyebrow, and took a sip of her own coffee, smiling softly.

    "Since when did you like strong black coffee, hun?" She said around her coffee cup, smirking.

    "Huh?" He looked down, and indeed, it was black and strong, no sugar or creamer. He hadn't noticed it at all. "Oh...I guess I'm just not all here lately.."

    "You really aren't all here. You've not said a word to me the entire trip over here....what's the matter, gofer?" She said his nickname in such a sweet way, that he smiled again, and leaned back in the seat across from her.

    "Well...I can kill two items up for question with one answer, Sara: A demon was helping Doc Hopper, and that demon tortured me." He said plainly.

    "I keep telling you...too much X-Men and Superman will rot your brain, Scoot." She said shaking her head a little, as she picked up her spoon and started to stir at her cup of coffee.

    "It's not....it's true, Sara! A man clothed in black, completely in black from head to toe. He took off a red glove, and hurt me. Then he pulled out a syringe and injected something into me....I'm still hurting over it." He said, staring down into his coffee cup. "That's why I've not called you in over two weeks."

    It was Sara's turn to sit back in her seat. Tears were welling in her eyes, and she glared down at the seat she was in. She stood up, and glared over at him.

    "That's why you've not spoken to me in over a month? And you've not called me in over two weeks?!" She said, to him she looked like she knew what he was going through, that she understood.

    But that understanding was shattering quickly, like a crystal ball.

    "Your...excuse, is that some demon tortured you, and that he was in league with Doc Hopper!?!? Doc Hopper is dead, Scooter...what were you really doing out there in Leland that was so darned important you couldn't call me!??!" Sara hissed in his face, gripping the sides of the table and the seat at once.

    "Sara...I....I couldn't help it! There arn't any phones in the swamp!! You know that!! And I was so hurt and dazed...I forgot to call you..." He said, trying to get her to understand what he had gone through.

    The crystal ball was cracked, and was about to shatter now. He could see it in her eyes. Her green eyes were blazing brightly now, she was furious.

    "....You were probably out with another woman, weren't you!?!" Her emotions were running so high, she wasn't even thinking about what she was saying now.

    "I would never cheat on you, and you know that!!" Scooter said, standing up in the seat. The patrons of Jim's Coffee Shoppe were starting to watch now, after Sara had yelled out that before.

    Sara's shoulder's slumped, and she turned around to him, looking defeated. The crystal ball was shattered completely now. He knew it would take awhile to gain her trust back...she would never believe the story of the human demon who tortured him. He just knew it.

    "Just go out with Kim...or someone else at Three Candles....they seem to really love you..." Sara mumbled as she started to walk out of the store, staring at the floor.

    "Sara...." Scooter ran after her. She was now sitting in her car, crying. Her mind had shut down for all rational thought, and it was stuck in her head, that he had probably found another woman that he loved. It was simply the problem of a woman going insane with anger. He pounded on the window a couple of times, until she rolled it down finally.

    "What?" She said flatly, wiping her eyes. She wasn't looking at him at all.

    "Let me in." He said, quite simply.

    "No. I'm not going to let you in....you....you broke my heart." Sara said, about to cry again.

    "How could I have broken your heart? I've done nothing wrong!" He said, getting a little angry himself.

    "You lied, telling me that tall tale about some stupid demon just to cover the fact you found someone else while in Leland!!" Sara snapped back at him.

    Scooter growled back at her. "You want to see proof, Sara!?!?"

    She lunged herself out nearer to the window, and was snarling herself. "YES I WANT TO SEE SOME GOD GIVEN PROOF THAT YOU WERE MAULED BY A DEMON!!!"

    "FINE!!" He yelled back, then he quickly unzipped his coat, and lifted up his yellow shirt. Sara was glaring at him, hot tears in her eyes. Then he gently took off the bandages that wound around his chest.

    His claw marked chest was there for the world to see. Where the injection site had been, was a small open wound, pitting and was oozing slightly. He cringed when the cold wind hit his chest at full force. In fact it was merely a breeze, but it felt like knives to him.

    "Are you happy, Sara? Is that enough proof for you? I still love you, and I would never leave you for another woman, and I would never lie to you. And you should know that." He said, solidly, while still holding his yellow shirt upwards.

    Sara was silent, staring at his chest now. He didn't lie. It may not have been a demon, perhaps....because in her mind, demons arn't real...but the wounds he had....were the same as claw marks. She unlocked the car, and sat back in her seat.

    "...get in..." She managed to choke out through her tears, she was trying hard not to sob just then. Scooter put his shirt down, and whinced getting into her car, then he settled into the passanger's seat. He placed a gentle hand on her shoulder, and rubbed it.

    "That was kind of a tall tale to take in, huh?" He said finally, after a few minutes of silence.

    Sara merely nodded, and she started up the car, and went off, towards her house. "The...the least I can do sweetie....is help rebandage you..." She said softly, her voice merely a whisper over the car's noise.

    "You don't have to you know." Scooter said, looking over at her, a smile on his face.

    "I want to. I'm...I'm so sorry for what happened eariler, gofer...I mean....I guess I just got jealous, and scared..."

    "Scared? Why would you get scared?"

    "That you would really leave me.."

    "Oh. I see...well you know that I would never leave you."

    Sara smiled, as she pulled into her driveway. The two got out from her car, and they walked inside her small house. He sat on the dingy tiny couch, which was more of a loveseat then a couch actually, and waited while she brought the first aid kit down. It was this huge, suitcase type deal; and she set this massive thing on the coffee table and opened it.

    "Wow, hon. You're prepared for....everything arn't you?" Scooter said, astonished at the size of the first aid kit.

    Sara nodded, and pulled out rolls of gauze, ointment, and a bottle of achelol and a small plastic-baggied washrag. "Okay, rinse it with this, then I'll put ointment on, and wrap you in gauze like a mummy."

    "...you really want me to do that." He said, staring at the bottle of achelol on the table.

    "Yes, I really want you to do that. Better to be in pain again for a short while, then to have it turn gangreous and have half of the skin on your chest falling off or get infected. Now, soak it in achelol, and pat yourself with it. Here's a dry one to clamp down on." She handed him another washrag which was wrapped around a clean solid rubber dog toy.

    "...what is in this thing?" He asked, looking now at the washrag wrapped rubber dog toy. "Is this a dog toy!?"

    "It's clean! Put it in your mouth, clamp down and hold on!!" She said, as she had gloves on, and was starting to go towards his chest with the achelol soaked washrag. He quickly put the toy into his mouth, and clamped down.

    -----------

    From the window outside, it was quite an interesting sight. A woman, and a man on a couch together. The woman had a rag in her hand, and gloves on, and the man looked like he was in extreme pain of some sort.

    "Weird sort of people in this town, eh, Dave?" The man said, smiling. The other man walking with him, just shook his head, and smirked a little.

    -----------

    "There, that wasn't so bad was it?" Sara said, smiling down at Scooter.

    "Ooww....that really hurt. It's still burning!" He said, frowning.

    "That's good though, it's getting all those nasty germs. With that kind of a wound I want you to be perfectly fine okay?" Sara smirked a little, then she slathered him up with the antibacterial ointment, and gently wrapped him in gauze.

    "That actually feels better. Thanks." He said smiling.

    "Not implying anything rude here, but maybe you should just stay for the night. It would be easier, and you would really be able to rest and everything you know?" Sara said, as they sat on the couch together. Scooter was shirtless, and laying across Sara's lap as the tv was blaring in the background softly.

    "Really? ...in the same room?" He asked, a quizzical look crossing his face. A bright blush crept across Sara's cheeks and she frowned playfully.

    "Of course not! I have a guest bedroom you can stay in." She said, pointing towards a closed door.

    "Well, if you don't mind it, I'm going to go ahead and turn in. I'm really tired after today." He then gently stood up, and started towards the door that was the guest bedroom. "Good night, Sara!"

    "Good night, my gofer!" She said smiling. As the door shut tight, she smiled, and stretched out across the sofa.

    "I hope he dosn't notice that that's actually my room..." She said to herself, and she cut off the tv, and turned over, going to sleep herself.
  4. The Count

    The Count Moderator Staff Member

    He's been through so much already, if only he knew... Good that you gave him something happy... Just looking forward to whatever's left.

    And was that a cameo by some non-Henson characters peering in at your home when you were bandaging up that go-fer? You might want to be a bit careful of that in the future... And I rully smile at the Hensonville landmarks referenced to here.
    Keep it up.
  5. ReneeLouvier

    ReneeLouvier Active Member

    I fixed it. XD
  6. redBoobergurl

    redBoobergurl Well-Known Member

    Wow! What a heated and intense chapter that was! I loved it! It was really very awesome! Looking forward to more!
  7. muppetwriter

    muppetwriter Active Member

    I really wanted to comment on this scene.:)

    While working on "Fraggle Street", I had accidentally typed "Hopper" instead of "Hooper", so I can relate when it comes to accidentally getting their names mixed up.

    Nice inside-joke, Renee.;)
  8. froggiegirl18

    froggiegirl18 New Member

    I really liked this last chapter. You have done a great job exploring Scooter's character and what really makes him tick. I just think this is good chapter almost seeing you interact with the character. I know it seems we get lost into the muppet's world, but this has been a nice story to come and read after doing some school work. Thanks Sara for my mini-vacations.:)
  9. muppetwriter

    muppetwriter Active Member

    Okay. I just got through reading Chapter Six, and I'm feeling very disappointed with Max. He's a complete wimp! Go back to Hopper because he's family?! Could someone please tell this guy that if he doesn't ditch Hopper that he'll eventually end up just like him?:boo:

    This is a great prequel, Renee. I just wish Max would've went to the Muppets if he needed the money so bad, instead of going back to that insane old man.:mad:
  10. ReneeLouvier

    ReneeLouvier Active Member

    I've just always seen Max as a total wimp. XD
  11. ReneeLouvier

    ReneeLouvier Active Member

    Chapter Sixteen

    The house was filled with rattles and crashs and bangs, when Scooter woke up. He wondered why Chef was up this early. He turned over and saw the silvery black clock sitting on a dark mahagony table. That wasn't his table. He blinked, and sat up. Putting on his glasses he backed up in the bed. This wasn't his room!!

    "Oh...where am I??" He asked himself softly, then he stepped out of the bed, and saw he was still halfway dressed. He still had his jeans on, but no shirt or shoes. He saw himself in the large mirror across the room. Then it hit him where he had been for the night.

    He felt like his heart was going to stop just then. "I'm never going to live this down." He said to himself once more. Someone knocked on the door. "Uh, yeah?"

    "Comeon, get decent. Breakfast." Sara stated from outside the door. She walked back into the kitchen, just in time to pull the toast out before it burned. "Ah..ah...crap...good...it's okay." She sat the hot pan of toast on the sink, letting it cool off before plating it up. It was eggs, toast, sausage, and coffee.

    Scooter yawned and walked inside the kitchen, still without a shirt and shoes, and Sara snickered. "Feeling already natural in here, huh?" She smirked at him, then sat down. "It's not a whole lot, but it's something."

    "Looks great." Scooter said smiling. He sat down and poured himself a cup of coffee, and just looked over at her. She was wearing a long yellow shirt, over a pair of black pants, and wasn't wearing shoes right now. Her hair was a mess, she looked like she just rolled out of bed and made breakfast.

    "After breakfast, I'll drop you off at the boarding house, okay?" Sara said, as they were eating.

    "Why can't I just spend the day with you?" He then asked her.

    "I don't really have the time today. I've got to get these articles done for the paper, hun. And I've gotta go get pictures of the new grocery store, and also help break ground for new park. Got a lot on my plate today, Scoot." She said, frowning for a moment. "I really wish you could tag along, but as I'm already in their way enough, having someone else hanging on me would just infuriate them more."

    "Them?"

    "Yes. The people who funded the new park and grocery store. Some new company called 'Denays'. Sounds like some high power company and all." Sara shook her head, taking another sip of her coffee, and frowning into it. "I wish they'd get out of Hensonville. They've threatened Kim with eviction twice."

    "They've threatened Kim!? That's the bookstore though, she and Lisa live there..." Scooter said, quite astonished.

    "I know. And I used to live there myself. And can't believe what they're trying to do to my sisters. I've told them, if they couldn't win the fight with them, they could come and stay with me. Don't have much room, but they are my sisters." She nodded, and frowned a little bit.

    "That's just horrible. What do you intend to do about it?"

    Sara nearly coughed on her coffee then. "Me!? I'm just one person, I can't do anything about it, hon. I've heard horror stories about people who try to go against them. They sue them within an inch of their lives, and they end up homeless and an outcast!"

    "You can live with me, at the boarding house then." Scooter said, with a finality she had never really heard before in his voice.

    "...Really?"

    "Really. I mean...I would never want to see you, or your sisters out on the streets. All of you can come and live at the boarding house. We've always got rooms open." He said, trying to hide the fact that he really loved her, and that he would do anything for her.

    Sara smiled, nodding. "Thanks....before I try to do anything with them though...I'd want to be a bit more finachally secure then I am now. I'm barely making ends meet as it is. Kim is taking care of Lisa, and I'm watching out for them both as well."

    "Kinda tough being the middle sister, huh?" He said, smiling.

    "Sorta. Kim's hardly ever there though, she's usually off somewhere getting more books for the store, or she's holed away in her room, doing research. Last time I saw her actually, was when I was moving my last stuff out of the bookstore, a couple of months ago."

    "What about Lisa?"

    "She's usually asleep. Poor thing wears herself out all the time. She's usually asleep, snoring into her Jewish studies book, or into one of her own books or notebooks. Either that or she's so deep into a book, you can't pull her out of it." Sara laughed a little, remembering this one time Lisa was just raving over one of her articles. "Or she's yelling in happiness over some book or article she's reading. I know she's reading something she loves when I started hearing 'Holy Mosqutioes!' all over that old libary!"

    Scooter started laughing a little bit, then he sighed, looking at his watch. "I guess you need to get going huh? It's nearly 9 am."

    "Huh?" Sara turned around and saw the clock on the wall, and she gasped. "Oh no! I was supposed to be there at 8:55am!!!"

    Sara jumped up, and ran to her bedroom, to get dressed in a flash. She took a quick shower, washed her hair, brushed her teeth, got dressed in a stylish pantsuit, and grabbed her Press Badge. She bolted back outside to the kitchen, and gulped down the rest of her coffee. She saw Scooter standing by the door, completely dressed now, ready to go.

    "Let's get going, Scoot! You are coming with me today, cause I don't have time now to drop you off at the boarding house or the theatre!" Sara said, as the two ran out the door to her car, and they nearly sped off towards the new grocery store.
  12. ReneeLouvier

    ReneeLouvier Active Member

    Chapter Seventeen

    They pulled up to the new grocery store, and Sara stepped out from her car, and checked her watch. She was only 5 minutes late, good. Back in the car, Scooter was still tightly gripping the door handle, he felt like his eyes were gonna bug out of his head.

    'I'm never letting her drive again with me in her car....' He thought over and over, but after a few minutes of not moving period, he got a bit more relaxed. He looked over to where Sara was now arguing with a thin man, who was bald.

    "I have told you Ms. Vines. Late again, and you're fired." The thin man spat at her, she glared back at him, her own temper flaring now.

    "Mr. Wonkins!! I was only late by 5 minutes! For that matter, no one else is here yet! What would it matter anyways! I would have been standing around in the lot, just waiting for someone to show up!" She said quite forcefully back at him.

    "I'm sorry Ms. Vines. You are fired. Give me your press badge, and I do not expect to see you at the opening of the new park today either. Understand?" Mr. Wonkins said icily, his hand extended to take Sara's press badge.

    "FINE!" She slammed the badge down into his hands, frowning deeply. "I'd like to see you find someone who can replace me, you old disagreeing skinflint!"

    Sara stormed back to her car, in tears now. She opened the car door and sat down heavily, staring at the steering wheel. Without a word, she got back out of her car, and walked over to the passenger's seat, and looked down at Scooter for a moment.

    "Can you drive?" She barely managed to whisper. He nodded and got out of the car, then walked around to the driver's seat, and got in. He didn't start the car though, but he looked over at her for a moment.

    "What happened? I saw the fight...but I couldn't hear what happened.." He said softly.

    "I got fired." She said, trying her hardest not to cry. She looked over at Scooter, her eyes stinging, her cheeks hot. "...I got fired from the state newspaper..." She then broke down in the car. She didn't have a job now.

    Scooter reached over, and then shimmied over to where she was, and she leaned against his shoulder, crying. He gave her a tight hug, and comforted her. Usually when people lost their job, it really wasn't a huge thing most times. But for her, she had had this job, ever since she was out of high school. She had crawled and clawed her way, honestly, up to Senior Reporter status.

    Another, shorter man walked over to Mr. Wontkins and looked towards the car for a moment. He saw that she was crying, and he frowned. "Why did you fire our best reporter, Wonkins?"

    "She had too many ideas in her head." He said, simply, looking over the new grocery store. He was looking over some papers, trying to find another reporter who could come in for her. "Wilkins...she was a changer. She went against the grain of how we do things here at The State."

    "She was our top reporter, Wonkins! Now who will we find to replace her!?" Wilkins said incredously. Wonkins expression got a bit horrifed then.

    "I have no clue, Wilkins." Wonkins said, frowning. Wilkins poured himself a cup of coffee, then handed one to Wonkins, who waved it away. "Don't drink the stuff, Wilkins, too much caffienee."

    "Well, you should. It's really good." Wilkins said, walking back to the truck.

    ----------------------

    Scooter pulled the dark car up into the driveway of the boarding house, and they just sat there for a moment. Sara had stopped crying a long time ago, but the memory was still fresh and painful.

    "Let's just go inside, okay? Relax some, and then we'll figure out how to deal with this later today." He said softly, as the two of them opened the doors to the car.

    Kermit was sitting in the windowseat, watching them. A small smile was across his face. He looked out to the living room for a moment. Nearly everyone was sitting in the living room, waiting for Scooter to come home. Most of them didn't notice that Sara was with him. "Oh, good." Kermit said softly, when she saw both of them walk out from the car. "They're safe."

    "Who's safe, green stuff?" Floyd asked, from his perch on the couch.

    "Like, who's in the driveway?" Janice then asked, curious, as she couldn't see out the window properly from her vantage point.

    "Scooter's back, with Sara. They're both safe...but something's wrong." Kermit said finally, when he got a good look at Sara's face. He saw that she had been crying for sometime now.

    "Go Scooter!" Clifford yelled, as the front door opened, and the two of them walked inside. It also didnt' help that Scooter had his arm around Sara's waist as well.

    "When are you two getting hitched?" Dr. Teeth asked, to which Scooter did a double take.

    "Married!? What?? No!!" He said, as the two then slowly made their way into the kitchen. "Can we please have some privacy please!"

    "Sure, the bedroom's up there, gofer!" Floyd said laughing.

    Scooter frowned. "Not THAT type of privacy...geez, guys! We're not going to get married, yes she's my girlfriend, quit bugging me about it please! She's had a really rough day, and I when I said privacy, I just mean I don't want everyone following us into the kitchen!! We just want to talk alone!!" He yelled out, over the clamor that had already started in the living room.

    "Oh." Janice said finally, through the silence that had fallen over the entire group just then. "Well...uh....like I guess we'd honor that. Rully, just wanting some time alone with your gurlfriend ain't that bad, right?" She said softly, knowing the many times she and Floyd had wanted privacy from the rest of the band, just to talk.

    Everyone agreed with Janice, and with that, Sara and Scooter made their way into the kitchen. They sat down at the island in the middle of the kitchen, and Sara frowned softly. She laid her head down in her hands, and sighed.

    "I can't believe Mr. Wonkins fired me, Scooter!" Sara said, exhausted.

    "She got fired, guys!" Robin said, his head pressed to the door, while telling Janice who told Clifford, who told Gonzo, who told Fozzie, and Fozzie told everyone else in the room.

    "It can't be that bad you know. I mean, you're a really great reporter honey...you're bound to find another job somewhere." Scooter said, smiling taking her hands in his.

    "Scooter just said she's a great reporter, and she could probably get another job somewhere. He called her honey!" Robin relayed yet again, down the telegraph line of muppets that were crowded around the kitchen door.

    "Aw, that's so sweet!" Fozzie said softly, smiling.

    "Yeah...I guess so. I mean...I just..." Sara paused for a moment, and looked at him, smiling. Then she frowned for a moment. "You're not looking too good, Scooter."

    "She just stammered...and...I think she just said that Scooter wasn't looking good." Robin said once more.

    "It was probably just so much time in the swamps. I don't really like it when Kermit just up and decides in the middle of shooting to go and visit his family..." Scooter said, a slight frown playing across his face.

    "Scooter said he dosnt' like when Uncle Kermit decides to go to the swamp in the middle of shooting." Robin said, frowning slightly. He loved it when they went to the swamp, and hearing his friend say that made him a little bit sad.

    Sara perked up a little bit, and heard Robin talking outside the kitchen door, and she smirked a little. Scooter didn't notice it at all. "Yeah, I guess so. But, I mean...what are we going to do?"

    "I don't know, Sara. Um...I do have something to...to ask you though..." Scooter said, smiling quite widely then.

    "Sara just asked him, 'What are we going to do?' then Scooter said he had something to ask her." Robin said, straining to hear them. The dishwasher that Chef had loaded, just started up in it's rinsing cycle, so it was harder to hear through the door now.

    Scooter got up from the table, and walked over to sit beside Sara. He reached into his coat pocket, and pulled out a small box. Then he took a couple of large breaths, and looked her straight in the eyes. "S-Sara?" He then opened the box, inside was a small diamond ring, beautifully set in a silver band, settled on a small bit of crushed red velvet. The velvet was heavy, and somewhat old. It looked like it had been taken from the velvet curtains of the theatre in fact.

    He gulped deeply, and looked at her, he was sweating bullets just then. "Would you...marry me?"

    Robin started hopping up and down just then, forgetting that he was supposed to stay quiet then. "He just popped the question to her, guys!! He just popped the question!!!"

    Janice started yelling happily, as did everyone else. As they were right outside the door, the sudden noise of cheering and yelling caught Scooter in suprise, and he fell off of the chair he was balancing on. He coughed a bit, and got back up, then was leaning on one knee, looking up at her. Before he was just sitting on the seat itself. Everyone crowded into the kitchen, awaiting Sara's response. They were waiting with bated breath.

    "Wow." She was as pale as a sheet then, staring at Scooter, trying to not see all the other muppets that crowded around her. "Um...uh...."

    Scooter smiled up at her. He focused on her, and he didn't see anyone else but her just then. It was the only thing keeping him from fainting. Sara then nodded, smiling sweetly.

    "Yes...I will." She said softly, as the was silent room erupted into cheers and celebration. Scooter placed the ring gently on her left ring finger, and gave her a huge hug, then a kiss on the lips. Sara laughed happily, and then leaned over and whispered into his ear.

    "After the Winter Splendor show, of course, right?" She said softly.

    "Right. You need to get everything ready anyways, right?" He whispered back into her ear. They pulled away from each other, and gave each other another kiss, and smiled. Everyone was congratulating them on their to-be marriage. Sara was laughing and smiling, as was Scooter. As they were able to walk out of the kitchen, Sara turned to Scooter, and smiled again.

    "I don't want to miss a moment of this, honey. I'll be writing everything down that happens to us." She said smiling.

    "Sounds great, Sara. I can't wait to read it when we're finished with it." He said, nodding his head in agreement. "But...when will it be finished?"

    "On our wedding day. That will be my last entry." Sara said, as they walked back outside to go and sit on the porch.

    "Great. Anything you write is a real treat." Scooter said as he settled down onto the porch.

    After a few hours, everyone finally stopped bothering them. They finally had real peace out on that porch, slowly swinging together, while chatting away. Little did they know, that their lives would be changed drastically so soon....

    ~-~The End~-~
  13. redBoobergurl

    redBoobergurl Well-Known Member

    Wow! What a great ending! The foreshadowing is great! It ties into the other stories really well! Awesome!
  14. ReneeLouvier

    ReneeLouvier Active Member

    YAY finally a comment. I've just been finangling about with the story. Wondering if I should add more, or take away anything, and MC forums has just been dead lately, today at least.

    So in my spare time I've been building a website!!

    http://www.geocities.com/reneelouvier/startpage.html

    Check it out! My stories are slowly being hosted there!

    (Slowly because I have to wait for each story to get loaded into it, I'm still waiting for Bonds of Family to show up. It's because they are SO huge, it's taking awhile for each one.)
  15. The Count

    The Count Moderator Staff Member

    You know... Got a bit of mixed feelings about these last two chapters.
    The foreshadowing was great... And Scooter's proposal, with the telegraph line of Muppets outside the kitchen door was superb.
    When you were talking about Wilkins and "Wonkins", were those references to the classic Muppets from Sam and Friends? If so, his name's spelled "W-o-n-t-k-i-n-s".
    Sara getting fired from the State Newspaper is another good touch that ties the stories into each other.

    My only botherance is bringing the evil Denays Corporation... Don't get me wrong, I know they'll play a part in the story we now have as #6, A Grand Adventure in Life... But I kinda liked/thought it better that they were only present or started to make their presence felt in the future of whatever year it is that Doc Brown and Marty McFly traveled to after meeting the Muppets at the boarding house. Heh, you're rully gonna to have to read that one closely before making timeline/chronological corrections to it.
    Also, reason I kinda prefer the Denays Corporation set in that future is cause that leaves us to live our lives with whatever normal changes may take place steming from the panoramic view of Hensonville we've built up. How you had me running the flower shop in Is That A Song There?, and how I then ran with that in One Little Star, and how Beth or Lisa or Ryan if he gets back can run with that from there.

    Other than that... Well, maybe the grocery opening could be the Hensonville branch of Hooper's Store, run or managed by Bryan?
    And the line about Lisa always falling asleep in her Jewish studies book or whatever other book she has handy... To coin a term from her herself, that stabbed me in the heart about oh, here.
    Good stuff, and I'm rully glad that you've continued this extremely popular series of stories. Look forward to whatever's next and have a good day.
  16. ReneeLouvier

    ReneeLouvier Active Member

    Yes they are. I originally had it spelled "Wontkins" but I thought that didn't sound right. Should have gone with my gut feeling with that one.

    Yeah, just felt like that would make sense.

    Welll...in my mind. They're not particularly evil yet. As this story would be read WAY before the 6th (A Grand Adventure In Life!) You would just barely remember that company. They're just starting out, as a coporation, and their first thing was that grocery store. It's just a plain grocery store, with Denays minor finhacal support. They're not evil yet. That usually takes about 20 or so years. *hint hint*

    I'd say it would be a Hensonville Branch of Hooper's Store, that is run by Bryan. ;)

    Yeah, I thought you guys would like that. Because thinking about it, me, Kim, and Lisa are kinda like sisters in the fanfiction world so to speak. And I'm the middle sister, younger then Kim; and older then Lisa. So, that's a tiny backstory.
    Yep.
  17. ReneeLouvier

    ReneeLouvier Active Member

    Okay, I contradicted myself there. They are starting to become evil. And yes they did threaten Kim with eviction....but I felt like giving a tease to it. I'm keeping it the way I had it. XD

    I may slightly alter the other stories to make it make sense.
  18. The Count

    The Count Moderator Staff Member

    OK... Gotcha then. Just so long as they're all shaped up, they'll end up being great. Take care, gotta catch up on some other reading.
  19. froggiegirl18

    froggiegirl18 New Member

    AWWW!! YAYAY! A happy ending. Great story...oooo so which story follows this story?
  20. ReneeLouvier

    ReneeLouvier Active Member

    Remembering the Good Times We Had! *laughs out loud, then sighs.* I'm so stupid I made a prequel after everything else was through.


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