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Harassment from an MC Member

Discussion in 'Feedback' started by BeakerSqueedom, Mar 11, 2010.

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  1. JaniceFerSure

    JaniceFerSure Active Member

    I don't know what started the ball rolling in the initial mentioned problem, but I do know that everyone has a pressure point and there is just so much that the human psyche can take.

    I throw penguins and confetti for fun, this is the only place where I can do it and not be taken literally.:batty:
  2. Beauregard

    Beauregard Well-Known Member

    Okay...I've spoken with a few more of the people involved and it seems to me that, as the ban is temporary, we should shut up this thread swiftly and move on so that, when the member returns (the ban really serving as a warning) he does not find a thread waiting for him where he has in turn been targeted and singled out (not by name, but it's obvious enough).

    Seeing as their ban is only temporary, the purpose of this thread seems only certain to ensure that he is publicly humiliated and will make it particularly uncomfortable and difficult for him to return at all...

    Bea:zany:{Note: I think this may be the first time ever that I have advocated for a thread to be closed...rather than battling it out to the bitter end...}regard
  3. Kiki

    Kiki Active Member

    Thank you, Ailie. I have to admit... I feel the same way. :( I'm not trying to start a pity party or anything, because I know a few people who feel the same way, but the whole clique-thingy is wearing a little thin. I dunno... certain threads give off really negative vibes, and now people seem to be dividing into groups, not willing to socialise with other members. It's true- that'd what's happened. Look, I've been a member since '06 (not as long as others, obviously, but that's almost a good four years) and even now I feel as though I can't connect with certain members, I feel as though I've missed something because I find it difficult to join in.

    Thank you Claudia and Ailie for bringing this concerning issue to our attention. I've noticed certain things myself. I can take a joke, and I know some of us will post things that we may later regret at one point or another, but when somebody is being deliberately spiteful for a long period of time, it really shouldn't be ignored, no matter who it is. I'm not aiming this at anyone but... c'mon guys- childish spats on a Muppet forum? It's the last thing we need.
  4. matleo

    matleo Active Member

    I agree with Beau.

    I had a long post that I had written detailing some thoughts on this scenario but instead I'm only going to leave it with this....

    The only purpose of this thread is to shed light on and publically humiliate someone who has contributed to this forum. While I do not condone his actions or comments and I do believe the individual has gotten what they deserve, I also believe that the creation of this thread is equally as harmful if not more so. I am sorry for the member of the forum who was insulted and hurt but at the end of the day this thread is just as bad only makes the situation worse.

    With that, I hope the moderators will see fit to close this thread. I think we're really only setting ourselves up for more trouble with it's existence.

    Thank you.

    Sincerely, Matthew Leonard

    P.S. Was hoping to find a copy of the forum rules to post here and remind everyone to play nice, share your toys, eat your veggies, and don't feed the monsters but could find it. If any of the mods (or anyone else) might come across it, it might not hurt to sticky it in order to quell any 'harassment or bullying' that some see as a problem.
  5. dwayne1115

    dwayne1115 Well-Known Member

    I would really like for someone to pm me and tell me what has gone on. I would just like to know so I would know better how to respond. So if someone would pm me to tell me whats going on it would be helpful.
  6. dmoss

    dmoss Member

    Here's a link to the Forum Rules, matleo! They're posted in the Announcement: Rules! :)
  7. matleo

    matleo Active Member

    Thanks Dmoss. Specifically I was looking for this....

  8. RedPiggy

    RedPiggy Well-Known Member

    Laws work SOOOOO well with those who routinely flout them. :p

    Anyway, I happen to agree that this thread is just a match being dipped in oil. Since I don't know anything about what happened or who is involved, let me offer some musings based on my own school experience back in the day:

    I would be beaten up, harassed, teased, falsely accused of stealing, etc. Guess who everyone felt sorry for? Yes, the poor, poor respectable bully who was simply misunderstood.

    Harley Quinn (sobbing as her bloodied body lay on the ground after Joker threw her out a window): It's my fault. I just ... didn't get the joke.
  9. Super Scooter

    Super Scooter New Member

    On the subject of cliques/outsiderness:

    I don't know as I've specifically seen any cliques with older members. Unless I'm part of one and don't know it. Heck, the only members from before I came on who are still here are frogboy, dw, beau, and the count... Hey! I just made a clique! :)

    Anyway, I understand outsidershipitude. Beauregard and I were both considered outsiders when we first started here. We found our own friends (who are all gone now), and now, for me, I've settled into this place where I still feel like an "outsider," but everyone's kinda used to me and don't seem to mind me too much. I fall into that wonderful category of "eh, that guy's all right I guess." It's a good place to be.

    As far as any other subject that may be discussed in this thread (I dunno, I wasn't paying attention... something about Lithuania?), I think there has been a lot of negativity on the forum. I've learned to avoid it... except for when I haven't, and I create silly threads about the multiplication of standardization or whatever that was.
  10. BeakerSqueedom

    BeakerSqueedom Active Member

    =) Thanks for sharing your thoughts, guys. I think the rule quote was just perfect for the thread, as a reminder to all who enjoy MC and stuffers. <3

    Okeis, I think this thread should be closed now. And to those who wonder how this came about, we won't give you the details at all. We want to keep it as private as possible so as to not cause much controversy. ^^

    Thank you so, so much.

    -- FIN! <3
  11. Bill Bubble Guy

    Bill Bubble Guy Active Member

    Pardon me. I have been in contact with my friend and he/she has asked me to deliver a message to everybody. He/she wants to let it be known that no malice was certainly intended at all and it has shocked him/her to read this thread and see how some people are so malignant towards him/her.

    I have been asked to share this message in my friend's own words and please don't attack me for it. I'm only the messenger, but I agree completely with the final point.

    "I am absolutely shocked beyond belief to see that Claudia has been suckered over to the enemy camp. I just have no idea why it's come to this.
    Now answer me this question... if the action was so quick to have me suspended for giving a certain someone the business about being a certain fictional character, then why is it that another certain member STILL hasn't been suspended/banned for REALLY being rude, arrogant and offensive towards several different members for YEARS?"

    I'm sure you'll know who my friend is talking about and on at least one occasion I have personally been harassed by this other member myself.
    So please don't shoot me as the messenger and I hope that my friend can still come back after suspension and we can all put this business behind us.

    And now I agree with what Claudia said before. Let this thread be closed.
  12. dwayne1115

    dwayne1115 Well-Known Member

    Wow Ok that brings some things to a light. I think all this is going to end up being brought up to a Muppet's peoples court or something.
  13. theprawncracker

    theprawncracker Well-Known Member

    I am shocked and confused. I am sickened and stunned. This whole mess is just disgusting. Both sides of this argument disappoint me to no end. The banned party for instigating such a thing and the bullied party for becoming the bullying party. Why can't we all just get along? It's NOT that hard, people. If someone bullies you or makes you feel unwelcome... screw them! You ARE welcome. This is MUPPET Central. ALL kinds are welcome, no matter what the hecklers say. Toss to the wind the opinions of those who make you feel less than welcome--they should be the unwelcome ones.

    Members who feel bullied or unwelcome need to get over their pity parties and realize that everyone has felt unwelcome at some time. You reported it to the mods and they took care of it. There is NO NEED to make it public knowledge and destroy a valuable member of this community. No matter what your opinion of the accused, you can't deny that his contributions to MC have made it the great place it is.

    I am SO disappointed in MC today. I am ashamed and just... disgusted. I'm disappointed in the banned member, I'm disappointed in the proprietors of this thread, I'm disappointed in Phil and the staff for letting it get this far, and I'm disappointed in the MC community as a whole right now. The ONLY person I'm proud of at this point is Ed "The Count" for doing his job. Thank you for that, my friend.

  14. RedPiggy

    RedPiggy Well-Known Member

    And one therapeutic thing to try is not belittle those whose feelings were hurt.
  15. Beauregard

    Beauregard Well-Known Member

    I don't think that was the intent here. It was just a little kick up'a the jaxie to remind people that their happiness is, primarily, in their own hands. I do agree that bad things have been said towards members here, and that people have treated others badly, it's true, but there must also be an element here which is that fact that each of us has felt like an outsider in the past (and even now!).

    I still feel a glow of unexpected happiness when someone who was here before me notices a post, laughs at one of my jokes or agrees with my thoughts on something because I still feel part outsider myself.

    I think this situation has been helpful to all parties, now we need to jump back into the pool and...well, I forget where this analogy was going, so let's just jump in the pool.
  16. Winslow Leach

    Winslow Leach Active Member

    This isn't just a case of someone feeling "unwelcome." It's someone targeting another member on purpose, for more than a year, for no other reason than to humiliate/embarrass him or her; to feel superior, without taking into consideration the feelings of the tormented member. Most people seem to be siding with the one who started all this, because of his/her popularity.

    So...it's okay if the one who has been targeted has been humiliated publicly? That because he/she is not as popular as the temporarily banned member can't feel equally "destroyed"? Does one even take into consideration another's feelings anymore?

    And in regards to another post here, I personally don't believe that "no malice was certainly intended at all." Really? Then why did it go on for over a year?
  17. TogetherAgain

    TogetherAgain Well-Known Member

    Stop it. Everyone, just stop. All anyone is doing now is repeating the same argument again and again and again and it's making things WORSE, not better. Get it? Saying OVER and OVER that people are doing bad things is MAKING IT WORSE.

    I'm utterly repulsed by this thread, both the things that led up to it and the things said in it. All that's happening now is that everyone is villainizing everyone else. It's time to grow up, move on, and let everyone heal. I'm not saying no wrong was done; obviously it was, by just about ALL parties, victims included. All I'm saying is that dwelling on it, rehashing it, repeating it again and again and again and again is the most immature, least productive course of action I have EVER seen on MC.
  18. frogboy4

    frogboy4 Inactive Member

    Prawny has a good point. Here are some great options if you feel harassed by another forum member - here or on any forum:

    1: IGNORE IT - sometimes taking a pause and ignoring the member is the best way to go rather than getting heated in the moment. There's also a "member ignore" feature if things go that far. It's best not to feed an angry beast.

    2: PRIVATE MESSAGE THE OFFENDING MEMBER - sometimes PMing the offending member and gently expressing your concerns in private or to make a truce to avoid one another can work wonders. Trust me on this.

    3: REPORT TO A MODERATOR - let the mods to their jobs. Yup, they're usually busy and it shouldn't always be the knee-jerk/go-to, but that's what they're here for. Conflict resolution.

    4: THINK BEFORE YOU POST - wait an hour before posting something you think could be taken the wrong way and read it again before posting it. Sometimes you'll decide to toss the whole response.

    5: CONSIDER THAT IT ALL COULD BE A MISUNDERSTANDING - give others the benefit of a doubt instead of hopping right in. It's hard to decipher context and desired inflection on a stark typed page. Come from a perspective of kindness.

    Remember that we all fall short at one time or another and we all can rub one another the wrong way. Nobody's perfect.

    Just my take. These things have worked for me on some occasions when things become prickly.
  19. Phillip

    Phillip Administrator Staff Member

    Thank you Jamie for the practical suggestions and for bringing this thread full circle.

    Decisions are not made lightly and everyone needs to adhere to the forum rules, most importantly respecting other members and treating someone like you’d like to be treated yourself. As was stated if issues arise with another member, please let a moderator know or report the post in question.

    This thread is being closed so that we can now move on…

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