Monsterpiece Theater - Jail 17

D'Snowth

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*Fade into Alistair Cookie's library*

ALISTAIR COOKIE: Hello, and good eve-a-ning... me Alistair Cookie, and me proud to welcome you to Monsterpiece Theater; tonight, me bring to you that classy play, that later made into brilliant movie, and later turned into play again by some guy named Spike... please, enjoy tonight... "Jail 17"...

*Cookie leans back into his chair, but suddenly remembers something he has to do, so he gets up, and leaves. Fade into the front office of a police department, where Blue AM is dressed as a police officer, going over the duty roster; shortly later, lavendar AM, dressed as a security guard, is dragging Cookie and Grover into the office*

GUARD: Come on you, come on... COME on!

COOKIE: Buh-buh-but me inn-o-cent!

GROVER: Yes, and I am innocent too.

*The guard walks up to the desk, saluting his superior*

CHIEF: At ease, Sergeant... what do we have here?

GUARD: Two new inmates, my Captain!

CHIEF: Ah, I see... are you two feeling lucky this evening? Well, are you, punks?

COOKIE: Oh, no, me no feel lucky at all.

GROVER: Neither do I.

CHIEF: Nor should you... we run a very tight ship here... no one ever escapes from this jail... NO ONE! What are your names...

COOKIE: Me Stanislas Cookievie, but they call me Cookie.

GROVER: And I am his bestest buddy, Harry Grovero!

CHIEF: Sergeant?

GUARD: Yes, my Captain?

CHIEF: Is there any jail cell that isn't occupied?

GUARD: Just one, my Captain, number 17.

CHIEF: Very well, come along you two!

*Cut to a long hallway, with seventeen jail cells, one of which is empty, all the others are full of monsters; at the end of the hallway, a large, steel door is opened, as the police chief escorts Cookie and Grover down the hallway, followed closely by the security guard*

CHIEF: Welcome to your new home, monsters... it is cramped, but I'm sure you will find it comfortable... and soon, we will all be the best of friends!

GUARD: That's right, I'm your NEW best friend!

GROVER: Oh, well, nice to meet you.

COOKIE: Yeah, you got cookie?

CHIEF: Enough! Let's go, your cell is right down here...

*The walk down the hallway begins, as Cookie and Grover observe each cell they pass, growing curious as to why every single prisoner is a monster*

CHIEF: One... two... three... four... five... six...

GROVER: Hey Cookie, have you noticed anything strange about this place?

COOKIE: Yeah... got no cookies!

CHIEF: Seven... eight... nine...

GROVER: No, look, all of the prisoners here are monsters, like us!

CHIEF: Ten... eleven... twelve...

COOKIE: Me wonder why that is...

GROVER: Beats me... but I suspect we'll find out soon enough...

CHIEF: Thirteen... fourteen... fifteen... sixteen... ah, here we go, number seventeen... your new home.

GUARD: Okay you monsters, in there now! In-in-in-in-in-in-in-in-in!

*The guard shoves Cookie and Grover into their cell, and lock it up tightly*

CHIEF: Now then, two less monsters to roam our streets... but at least you have a home, and friends to take care of you.

GROVER: Exactly why is it that all of the prisoners here are monsters?

COOKIE: Yeah... *To the guard* and if you me new best friend, would you bring me some cookies?

GUARD: *Laughs* Ah, drop dead!

CHIEF: This is our maximum security prison for monsters... we can't have you monsters walking around out there, out on the streets... you might scare the little children, and frighten them away.

COOKIE: Hey, that general-I-za-shun!

GROVER: That is right, we monsters do not go around frightening people... why, we are very friendly once you get to know us.

CHIEF: That is why we will get to know you ourselves... come along, Sergeant.

GUARD: Yes, my Captain!

*The police chief and the security guard walk back down the hallway, and out the door, locking it up as they go*

COOKIE: What we do now, Harry?

GROVER: We have got to figure a way how to escape from here...

*Just then, Elmo emerges from the drain pipe in the middle of the floor*

ELMO: Escape? Ha! You don't want to escape from here!

GROVER: Why not?

COOKIE: And who you?

ELMO: Elmo Scrounger's the name, and as Elmo was saying, you wouldn't want to escape from this jail, no siree!

COOKIE: But why not?

ELMO: Are you kidding? This monster jail is the greatest in the world!

MONSTER WITH LAMPSHADE HAT in CELL #12: You bet it is! Fun, fun, fun, day-in and day-out, without let-up!

MONSTER WITH BOTTLE OF COKE in CELL #14: I've been in some fantastic monster jails in my life, but this one is by far, the most fantastic of them all!

MONSTER EATING CAKE in CELL #5: See that manhole cover in the middle of the hall there? That leads to a tunnel!

GROVER: You mean monsters CAN escape from this jail?

RANDOM MONSTER in CELL #6: No! It's so we can smuggle new monsters IN!

RANDOM MONSTER in CELL #9: HEY! I SMELL NEW COOKIES BAKIN' IN THE MESS HALL!

COOKIE: COOKIES? ! Harry, we no can escape from this fabulous monster jail... THEY GOT COOKIES!

GROVER: Come on Cookie, snap out of it!

ELMO: Hey, lay off, you'll get used to all of this... by the way, we've got a game of volleyball going in the play yard after while.

GROVER: Did you say volleyball?

ELMO: Yes!

GROVER: Oh, well, I do enjoy the occasional game of volleyball myself...

COOKIE: Harry, we gonna be VERY happy here!

GROVER: Maybe we will...

ELMO: That's the spirit! Well, see you later... *Gets into the drain* Elmo promised the chief that he would give him all of the bottle caps he collected so he can have an egg for breakfast! Bye! *Goes down the drain*

*Cut to Alistair Cookie's library, where Elmo emerges from in front of the chair*

ELMO: Uh oh, Elmo took a wrong turn... oh well... this Alistair Elmo saying bye-bye from Elmo-piece Theater!
 

RedPiggy

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Heheheh ... okay, that was different. What is this based on?
 

D'Snowth

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This is yet another example of WW2/POW camp movies spoofs.

For the most part, it's spoofing the movie Stalag 17, which was later ripped off by a popular classic sitcom - Hogan's Heroes.
 
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