Monsterpiece Theater: Number 17

jonnytbird

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Monsterpiece Theater: Number 17
Parody of Alfred Hitchcock’s thriller of the same title.

Alistair Cookie: Good evening and welcome to Monsterpiece Theater. Me, Alistair Cookie. Tonight, another film featuring suspense, counting, and black and white. Also made by guy named Alfred. So now, brace yourselves and watch "Number 17."

(Fade into a black and white footage of a train rolling down the tracks. With suspense music played in the background. Fade into the next scene where we find The Count (dressed in a jacket and wearing a cap) climbing out the caboose while being chased by three thieves (anything muppets).)

Thief #1: (fat blue, voiced by David Rudman) You know you have what belongs to us!

Thief #2: (green, voiced by Kevin Clash) Yeah! Cough up the good stuff!

The Count: Uh oh. Those thieves are ganging up on me. I’ll know, I will jump to each train car up ahead and we’ll find out how many cars it takes to lose the thieves. Oh, and don’t try this at home. Here we go! (Jumps from the caboose to the first train car.) One! (A number 1 appears on the screen.) That’s one car, and...(As the Count looks behind, he notices the thieves had jumped to the car and still catching up to him.)

Thief #3: (lavender, voiced by Martin Robinson) Phew! That was a close one, boss.

Thief #1: Never mind about that! After him!

Thief #2: Yeah! Let’s go!

The Count: They’re still after me! Looks like we have to keep going. (Jumps over to the next car.) There, now that’s two! (A number 2 appears on the screen.) Two cars! But wait...(Notices that the thieves made it and still chasing him.)

Thief #1: We’re not giving up that easy, you know!

Thief #3: Yeah, that’s right!

Thief #2: You tell him, boss!

The Count: Well they’re absolutely right about that. But not for long, ha ha.(Jumps over to the next car.) Three! (A number 3 appears on the screen.) That’s three cars!

(The thieves also jump over to the next car chasing The Count.)

The Count: Looks like this is gonna take a while. So here we go!

(The music gets faster as the camera shows The Count’s feet jumping on each car one at a time. The numbers from 4 to 17 will appear on the screen one at the time as The Count counts each car he jumped)

The Count: Four! Five! Six! Seven! Eight! Nine! Ten! Eleven! Twelve! Thirteen! Fourteen! Fifteen! Sixteen! Seventeen! (After The Count counted the 17th car, he stops running to catch his breath.

(The thieves try to jump to car #17 but didn’t make it which they all fell.)

The Count: Well there you have it! It took me 17 train cars to jump on in order to lose the thieves! Ha Ha Ha Ha!

(Thunder and lightning appears.)

The Count: Ah, yes. (Pulls out a bag and opens it.) Good thing they didn’t take my prized possession. Ha Ha Ha Ha! (Pulls out a number 17 from the bag. Camera zooms in on the 17 as the music reprises and fades back to the Monsterpiece Theater set.)

Alistair Cookie: (to off camera) We’re back on now? (notices camera) Oh! And so we come to the end of that horrific tale, "Number 17." Now me show you preview of next week’s story, "16 cookies!" (Pulls out a box of cookies as the theme plays.) One cookie! (eats cookie) Two cookies! (eats cookie) What the hey? Forget the counting! (Poors all the cookies from the box into his mouth and gobbles them all up.)

The End
 
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