Moving on with my life

tutter_fan

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Before I say what happened that changed my life in the blink of an eye, I want you to know that I have lived with my grandparents here in Champaign, IL for almost 21 years. My grandparents are almost in their 80s. My grandpa has Dementia & Alzheimer's disease, and at this point in time, I believe his memory has been almost destroyed. Eventually, my grandma won't be able to help take care of me anymore. Originally, I was going to end up living with my dad after my grandma gets to the point where she can't take care of me anymore. I wasn't going to let that happen because I originally had plans to live with my family in Mobridge, SD, because I had a better relationship with my family up there than I would have with my dad. But, things had changed, as you'll find out in the story below.

Last month (I think it was on the 19th) was a crazy month for me. I woke up, got ready to start my day, not knowing what most of the day would bring me. My day seemed quite normal. I went through my usual routine after I got up, and then I went out for the day. I had talked to my dad a few days before. He sounded like he was sick, and that was quite understandable. We talked for a few minutes and then I hung up the phone. My grandma had originally said to me that I would live with my dad if I had plans to move out. I thought to myself, given the circumstances that my younger step-brother Dominick & I had been through, that I wasn't going to let myself live with my dad. I would rather have fought my dad in court because with me being 30 years old, I thought that I should be given the right to decide for myself where I want to live. Both my step-brother & I had an "on again/off again" relationship with our dad. Truthfully, I knew very little about my dad, yet, even though he & I didn't have a good enough relationship, I loved him, but I was more than willing to do ANYTHING in my own power to prevent myself from living with my dad. I had thought that if I were to live with him, my life would be a living [insert appropriate swear word here that begins with the letter "H"]. I thought that I would be unable to do some of the things I've done while living with my grandparents. I probably would've been forced to eat stuff I didn't care about, etc.
Anyways, I went though the afternoon like usual, going with the flow. But as soon as I came home, things had changed for me dramatically. A friend of mine dropped me off at the house (and this was at around maybe 8 or 9 at night), and there was a vehicle in my driveway. It was my uncle John's vehicle. I remember thinking to myself as I was walking to the door: "well, this is unusual! What in the world would he be doing here at his parents house this late?" As soon as I opened the door, my uncle John, my aunt Gilda, and my aunt Mary were in the living room, and so were my grandparents. My grandma was crying. She told me to sit down. She told me my dad had passed away. My dad was sick for the last month, and he had been reportedly been feeling unwell. He had a severe case of sore throat. While I was out on Tuesday afternoon, (and no one knew about this until just shortly before I got home) he had gone to the hospital, and got some medication, and on his way out to his motorcycle, he collapsed. He called 911, but by the time they arrived, it was too late. He had originally lived in Wichita Falls, Texas for a while, then he came to live with me & his parents for almost 2 years, and then he moved back.

I couldn't believe what she had just told me. My aunt Gilda had started calling some other family members, alerting them about what happened. I went on Facebook and started alerting my friends & family who are on FB about it. One of my friends who was a good friend of my dad found out, and came over. This friend of mine had known me ever since she was little. She told me that if I needed anything to let her know.

Things didn't start getting interesting until Thursday night. I went to the bowling alley like I usually did, and I let a few friends of mine who I see there know about my dad's passing. They all were very sorry to hear about it. I'm glad that a lot of my friends were at the bowling alley. I needed them. Since my dad had passed away, I wasn't absolutely sure what would happen to me as far as where I'd live next, but as soon as I came home, that was all settled.

I can tell you now that the end result of where I will live next is incredible. Like I had originally said, my grandma had wanted me to live with my dad, but with the rocky relationship I had with him, I didn't want to live with him. But, since my dad had passed away, something had to be done as far as where I should live next. My mom lives in Kansas City, MO (Independence area), and she's always busy, and usually doesn't have any time for me. Plus, if I wanted to go to a mall, or any other place, I'd have to have her drive all the way to Kansas City, Kansas, and that can sometimes be time-consuming and money-consuming.
I had been informed shortly after I arrived home at the bowling alley that I'd be living with my step-mom! Before I tell you how I felt about that, I must tell you that I have a very wonderful relationship with my family in Mobridge, SD. I've paid a visit to my family in Mobridge, SD for the last 3 summers, and I enjoyed every second of it. My 2 step-brothers (Dominick is the 2nd most youngest in the family, and our brother Buddy is the youngest) and I have had a great relationship with each other since I've gone to visit. I also have a wonderful relationship with my step-mom that I cherish quite a lot.
When I was informed that I'd be living with my step-mom, I couldn't believe it. I had originally thought that the rest of my life would be for nothing. But now, that's changed, and it's changed for the better. At this point in time, I have no idea of when I'll be moving, but I can tell you right now that I will STILL be with you guys. There is no way I'm making any plans to stop using the internet!

By the way, I used to work for a company here in Champaign, IL called "Melody Music". You might think that it's a music company, or a record store, or what have you. However, that's actually incorrect. Melody Music is a company that deals with entertainment, as in Jukeboxes that are CD players, Jukeboxes that connect to the internet, foosball tables, hockey tables, pool tables, pinball machines, video games, redemption games, video gambling, etc. My job was to test the pinball machines & video games to ensure they worked properly. If I found a problem, I'd write it down, and I'd repeat this process until I saw there were no other problems. I'd leave a report of what problems I found, and the friends I worked with would fix them. I got paid pretty darn well for what I did. But one day, before I started work, I was told to come into the main office at some point. Even though I had an idea of what was going on, I wasn't really sure. I felt strange, and somewhat scared not knowing what was to come. When I went into the office, I was officially informed that within 3 weeks, I would no longer have a job at Melody Music. My performance there was outstanding. I was well liked, and I believed I fit in well. But with the Gaming board of Illinois approving the use of video gambling, the gaming board required everyone in the warehouse who worked at Melody Music to have a license to run the games, get the required training to get the license, and get insured as well. BUT, if I was to be trained & insured, the cost would be very expensive, so because of that, I lost my job. I felt devastated. All the hard work I had put in as far as playing video games for over 20 years, and all the hard work I did for Melody Music within a year and a half had come crashing down on me. I couldn't believe that they would do such a thing to me, especially after all I had done for the company. I've been jobless since then.
I am still friends with the company, and I do pay occasional visits just to see if I can do anything for them on a voluntary basis.

One day, my brother Dominick (who is about 26 or 27 now) had seen an ad in the local newspaper for a job at a company called Freidel's Music & Recreation. He applied and got the job. The job description was vague to him at first, but he doe a LOT of stuff for that company. They're the equivalent of Melody Music here in Champaign, IL, and he goes all over the place, putting in machines, fixing them, and he doesn't just do games at a local level. He actually goes out of town sometimes, and he sometimes even goes out of state to fix games right at whatever location they're at. This past summer when I came to visit, I took a tour of where he worked, and I was like a kid in a candy store! I can tell you that virtually almost each and every video game & pinball machine they own is very, very old school! I'm talking about maybe early 80s to today. I know today's games aren't "old school", but in about 20 years, they will be.
He had talked to his boss, and even though I didn't meet my brother's boss, I was told that my brother's boss would LOVE to have me on the team. So, eventually, within possibly the next 6 to 8 months, I will be moving to live with my family in Mobridge, SD, and I will possibly and most likely be able to continue what I DO BEST, which is testing video games, and doing something like this is one thing I've always dreamed of since I was maybe 20 years old. To know that I might end up continuing with this "gaming" career is something that is very, very satisfying to me. I will be sure to let you guys know what's going on.
 

tutter_fan

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I do admit that though the last 20 years did have times where things were tough, and frankly, having a few cats around has relieved me of unwanted stress. I used to own a very, very affectionate, very playful, very caring black cat named Nubey. He was very handsome. Me & my grandparents received him when he was just a year old and he was declawed already. He was almost PURE black, with a little splotch of white where his tail began. I will never forget the first week we had him. I was a bit nervous, not knowing how I would be received by him. Within 4 to 5 days, his personality was revealed to me. I was downstairs, watching TV, minding my own business, and all of a sudden, this handsome fellow jumps on my lap, looks at me, nudges my face, purrs really loud, and "kneads" me. The next time I saw him after that, he did the most cutest, most sweetest thing a cat could ever do. He ran up to me, gave me the most friendliest meow I've ever heard (more like a chirp), rubbed his legs against me, and then he jumped up on his hind legs, and hugged me! I had never met a cat who was so caring, so sweet, so loving as Nubey. Often, I would be in the middle of working on something on my computer like I am now, and he'd jump on my bed, and meow at me to pet him. I know he wasn't cat show quality, didn't like being held like a baby, and didn't like being rubbed on the tummy. We had him for about 11 years. He had to be the most loving cat I've ever had in my life. He loved to play, and I'd tease him a lot. If he wasn't doing anything, he'd be on my lap, nudging my face, kissing me, talking to me, etc. I couldn't tell if he has some kind of breed in him, but one day, I looked up some info on the Bombay cat breed, and when I read the personality traits a Bombay cat had, I was surprised & delighted to find out that he might have possibly been part Bombay because of his fun loving personality. Putting him to sleep was one of the hardest things my grandma had ever done. He & his brother Chico (who is still alive) have helped me through thick & thin. I'm happy to have had him for as long as I did.
 

fuzzygobo

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I'm glad things will work out for you, having a new home with a loving family, new job, etc. I know how hard things can be in life. But I try to tell younger people,... THAT'S LIFE. Life is not always going to be easy, and sometimes you're going to have a lot of crap thrown at you. Is it fair? No. But it's how you deal with it that will determine your destiny.

My condolences for your dad. I didn't have the best relationship with mine either, but I still loved him. And before he died I made my peace with him.

I hope 2014 is the year you get to shine.
 

tutter_fan

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I'm sure it will fuzzygobo, and thanks for the condolences. I am absolutely 100% sure that the upcoming year will be a great year for me. This year was a great year for me, and even though it ended on a sour note with my dad's passing, I feel that there is nothing for me to worry about. I am looking forwards to what lies ahead for me in the upcoming year, and no matter how thick & thin things might get before I move, these situations will pass in due time.
 
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