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Muppet Survivor Game

Discussion in 'Games' started by Fozzie Bear, Sep 4, 2005.

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  1. BEAR

    BEAR Active Member


    :rolleyes: Si, detatch yourselfs from middle-aged pretty boys. It gifs off wrrongk vibe, okay. khey, baby steps, baby steps...Hehehehe!!!
  2. redBoobergurl

    redBoobergurl Well-Known Member

    Ok, so Statler goes to Waldorf after Miss Piggy has a temper tantrum onstage "boy the pig will do anything for attention. Who does she think she is?" and Waldorf goes "Lindsey Lohan" and they both go "doh ho ho ho!"

    No good? Well, I'm better at humor for 3 year olds, kee-hee-hee-hee.
  3. Beauregard

    Beauregard Well-Known Member

    Oh, my, yes!

    *gets out notebook*

    Statler: Statler thinks it was bad!
    Waldorf: Waldorf thinks it was good!
    Statler: Statler things it wasn't that bad...
    Waldorf: Waldorf thinks it could have been a lot better.
    Statler: Statler thinks it was good.
    Waldorf: Waldorf thinks it was terrable!
    Statler: Statler thinks Waldorf has watched too much Elmo's world.
    Waldorf: Elmo's World? Waldorf thinks that was terrable.
    Statler: Statler thinks it was good.
  4. BEAR

    BEAR Active Member

    This is your Beary friendly host!

    Your deadline for the Statler & Waldorf Writing Challenge is up. They will be awarded points by a panel of judges to determine the winner. Statler and Waldorf could not make it to judge these for themselves. When asked why they couldn't be here, this is what they had to say...(cut to clip)


    :boo: Appear on Muppet Survivor Island? You call that a vacation?
    :sleep: Hey, it's bad enough we've been trapped in the balcony for 30 years!
    BOTH: Doh-ho ho ho!

    (back to me)
    So, we have assembled the next best Muppet commentators around to score your scripts. They are:
    Pepe the King Prawn (Ryan the Prawncracker)
    The Newsman (Ed)
    and Oscar the Grouch (BEAR)

    :grouchy: I don't wanna do this!

    Each judge will give a score of 1-5 (1 low, 5 high) for each joke. We will begin with Mildred's bit about Elmo.

    Statler: Statler thinks it was bad!
    Waldorf: Waldorf thinks it was good!
    Statler: Statler things it wasn't that bad...
    Waldorf: Waldorf thinks it could have been a lot better.
    Statler: Statler thinks it was good.
    Waldorf: Waldorf thinks it was terrable!
    Statler: Statler thinks Waldorf has watched too much Elmo's world.
    Waldorf: Elmo's World? Waldorf thinks that was terrable.
    Statler: Statler thinks it was good.
  5. G-MAN

    G-MAN Active Member

    Where's Sal, he has to do his routine.
  6. BEAR

    BEAR Active Member


    If Sal can get in his bit before the end of the judging, then it will be considered for immunity.
  7. theprawncracker

    theprawncracker Well-Known Member

    :rolleyes:: Hola dot com weilders. Pepe here on de set of Muppet Survivor Island. Hokay? Now, let's get dis thing started. *re-reads joke* Dios mio, jou wrote dis? All by jour self? Without even somebody to help jou? Dat's pretty good. Hokay? Um, let me see here, I tink I will give it a cuatro. And, for those of jou who do not speak espanol, dat es a four for Miss Mildred. Hokay?
  8. MrsPepper

    MrsPepper Active Member

    **swears** I was just about to do this!! Dern.

    Edit: saw your post bear. Please go slowly!!
  9. redBoobergurl

    redBoobergurl Well-Known Member

    Don't worry Sal, you'll make it in time! I'm sure yours will be funnier than mine! I'm nervous now. Where's my Rubber Ducky?
  10. BEAR

    BEAR Active Member

    This will take a bit of time, so don't worry so much about it.
  11. MrsPepper

    MrsPepper Active Member

    Okay, good. I'm not very funny at all... that's why I'm only a sidekick.
  12. MrsPepper

    MrsPepper Active Member

    :sleep: : Hey Statler!
    :boo: : What?
    Waldorf: Do you know why Sal failed at the Muppet Survivor Challenge?
    Statler: No, why?
    Waldorf: Because he couldn't make a joke about Tom Cruise! **laughs**
    ...
    Statler: That joke isn't funny.
    Waldorf: Well, neither is Tom Cruise.
  13. G-MAN

    G-MAN Active Member

    Oh dear, I hope they like mine.
  14. The Count

    The Count Moderator Staff Member

    The Newsman...
    *Hearing Mildred deliver her scripted joke for Statler and Waldorf...

    Well, I can get the gist of what she was trying to do. Not unlike the routine they did where they kept saying a particular act was worse than what the other had just proclaimed, going further and further competing with themselves until they convinced themselves it was a good act instead.
    Not sure on which TMS episode it was though. I'll brave the relative danger of my desk and flip up this score card...

    *Flips up a 2.
  15. BEAR

    BEAR Active Member

    :grouchy: (reading Mildred's writing) Well, it wasn't very fresh, but I like things rotten not fresh...and it was attempting to put that red menace in his place for once. Hmmm...I give it 3 rasberries! Thdbt thdbt thdbt!!! Hehehehe!!
  16. BEAR

    BEAR Active Member

    Alright! Thanks, Judges. We will be adding up all the scores at the end. We now move on to Sal's piece...

    Waldorf: Hey Statler!
    Statler: What?
    Waldorf: Do you know why Sal failed at the Muppet Survivor Challenge?
    Statler: No, why?
    Waldorf: Because he couldn't make a joke about Tom Cruise! **laughs**
    ...
    Statler: That joke isn't funny.
    Waldorf: Well, neither is Tom Cruise.
  17. BEAR

    BEAR Active Member

    :grouchy: (looking at Sal's composition) Well, it wasn't quite that funny til I got to the last 2 lines. It was icky sypathetic until I was hit with the Tom Cruise trash talk out of no where. What a nasty trick...I loved it!! 4 rasberries!!
  18. theprawncracker

    theprawncracker Well-Known Member

    :rolleyes:: Well monkey man, I see what jour trying to get at, I mean come on, Tom Cruise, he stoal Katy Holmes from me! Hokay? We must get him back! We-Oh um, anyway, I must agree with jou dat Tommy is not funny. Hokay? But dat's because he isn't in comedies. Thank the giant squid for dat. Hokay? So, a nice try, but I'm going to have to give jou a 2. Hokay?
  19. The Count

    The Count Moderator Staff Member

    Well... I'll hate myself in the morning, but I agree with Oscar. The end about Tom Cruise not being funny was dead on.
    *Discovers his cards are mostly missing... Oh, um, do you mind if I just give you this score? It's the only one I got left.
    *Flips up a 2 again.
  20. BEAR

    BEAR Active Member

    Next is Boober's pitch...

    Ok, first Statler says "Say, did you hear about what happened to Rosie O'Donnel at the county fair?". Then Waldorf says "No, what happened?". Then Statler says "She tried to enter a beauty contest and the judge said, 'Sorry, no animals allowed'." Then they both laugh.


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