Sesame Street News: Count Dracula

wiley207

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Well, since it's October, I thought I'd put reporter Kermit the Frog in Transylvania. Here it is...

The Sesame Street News Flash logo appears and its theme music is heard.

Announcer (Jerry Nelson): We take you now to Kermit the Frog with another fast-breaking news story!

The scene fades over to a very creepy-looking hill. Dark clouds cover the moon in the night sky, and there is a castle on top. Kermit the Frog, decked out in his reporter gear, is walking nervously with his microphone.

Kermit (Jim Henson): There’s no such thing as ghosts… there’s no such thing as ghosts… (jumps suddenly) AAH! Oh, I’m on camera? Whew… Uh, hi-ho, this is Kermit the Frog of Sesame Street News, and I am reporting live from Transylvania, home of the famous Count Dracula as well as other ghosts and spooky characters. And I have been forced, uh, I mean, I volunteered to do an interview with Dracula himself! (boasting) And don’t worry, I’m not scared of anything! (a wolf howls, and Kermit jumps in fright) YOW!!! That is, I mean, I don’t believe in ghosts and all that superstitions. But just to be sure, I have this horseshoe with me. (holds up his horseshoe and puts it back in his pocket) Now to go up to the castle…

The Beautiful Day Monster swoops by.

Beautiful Day Monster: (Frank Oz) Hello, frog!

Kermit: YIKES! A monster! I’d better hurry! (zips off)

Beautiful Day Monster: But I just wanted to be friends.

Kermit: Well, I hope that was the only monster I run across here, that is, until… (gulp) I meet Count Dracula. Ooh, it’s getting a little chilly here.

Now there is a flash of lightning followed by a big thunderclap!

Kermit: AAAH! I mean, uh, it looks like it’s going to rain, so I’d better hurry!

A ghost slowly floats up to Kermit; it’s basically someone with a white sheet over his head without any eyeholes.

Kermit: YIPE, A GHOST! Wait… (chuckles nervously) It’s only someone playing a joke on me. It’s probably Harvey Kneeslapper or someone like that… (Kermit pulls the sheet off the figure, to reveal Fred the Dragon)

Fred: (Frank Oz) Thanks, bub. I couldn’t see in that sheet and it was getting really hot.

Kermit: (gasps, then runs away from it) Wow… I had no idea I was going to be so nervous… hark, what’s that?

The Big Bad Wolf (the giant blue version) swoops up to Kermit.

Kermit: Oh no, it’s a WEREWOLF!

Wolf: (Jerry Nelson) No, frog, it’s just me, the Big Bad Wolf. Did you see the Three Little Pigs around here?

Kermit: I think I saw them outside the gate here. And I am glad you’re not a werewolf.

Wolf: Everybody thinks I am a werewolf whenever I am around these parts. (walks off)

Kermit: (gulp) I’m almost at the castle. Here I go. (walks up the stairs to the giant haunted castle and then bats fly around) AAH, BATS! Shoo! Shoo! (Kermit shoos them off)

Bat: What a scaredy-cat!

Kermit: I am not! Well, ladies and gentlemen, looks like I’m going to do the interview after all.

Kermit nervously pulls a bell cord. A large church-like bell gongs loudly.

Kermit: Somehow I’ve expected a doorbell like that.

The door slowly creaks open, and then who should answer the door but Count von Count!

Kermit: Uh, are you Count Dracula, sir?

Count: (Jerry Nelson) No, I am the Count! They call me the Count because I love to count things! And I shall count you. One! One worried frog! Ah-ah-ah-ah! (it thunders again with flashing lightning as a number “1” appears onscreen)

Kermit: It looks like it’s about to rain.

Count: Don’t worry, it always thunders when I do that. So you wanted to see my grandfather, the great Count Dracula? I am here to visit him.

Kermit: Oh-oh-oh… OK.

Count: All right then… GRANDPA! Someone’s here to see you!

Suddenly, Count Dracula creeps up from the door and stands next to the Count! (Dracula’s made out of a Pumpkin-type Anything Muppet.)

Kermit: Uh, uh-uh-uh… I don’t want to go through with this… Folks, this is Kermit the Frog returning you to your regular program, and I am getting OUT OF HEEEEEEEEERE!

Kermit runs off with a big “ZIP!”

Dracula: (Richard Hunt) Now what was that frog doing there?

Count: I really don’t know. We should get you back inside, Grandpa. It will soon be morning.

Dracula: OK, grandson.

They go back into the castle and shut the door.


So, whaddaya think?
 

minor muppetz

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That was good. It's weird that Kermit hoped that he didn't see any more monsters. He has regularly interracted with monsters on Sesame Street and The Muppet Show, and he normally wasn't scarred of those monsters.
 
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