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T*K*O - "The Joke Killer Strikes Again"

Discussion in 'Friends and Family' started by D'Snowth, Jun 12, 2006.

  1. D'Snowth

    D'Snowth Well-Known Member

    T*K*O
    (Starring: MrsPepper, Vic Romano, ThePrawnCracker, D’Snowth, TogetherAgain, Vibs, and Beauregard)​

    Episode #: 29
    Title: “The Joke Killer Strikes Again”
    Original Airdate: 12-Jun-2006
    Written By: D’Snowth
    Created By: MrsPepper

    Our scene opens today inside the dimmed office of D’Snowth, who had his blinds closed and his over-head lights turned off. All that was on was his desk lamp and his computer...and soon to be the PA system. As he was sitting at his computer with his headphones on, he was singing horribly HORRIBLY off-key. Suddenly, a mysterious hand flipped on the PA system, and suddenly, the entire building was met with...

    D‘SNOWTH: (Over PA system and singing horribly off-key) ...WHAT DOES IT TAKE TO MAKE A MA-A-A-A-A-A-A-N? /WHAT DOES IT TAKE TO MAKE A WOMA-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-N...

    THEPRAWNCRACKER: (Terrified) What that heck IS that?

    VIC ROMANO: (Shocked) I think someone’s dying over the PA system!

    With that, everyone rushed out of their offices and into D’Snowth’s office to find him singing to the song he was listening on his computer.

    D‘SNOWTH: (Still singing off-key) ...TO MAKE A MA-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-N!!!! (Stops singing) Sing it Kathy! Sing it!

    D’Snowth then turned around and was startled to see everyone standing in his doorway laughing hysterically. D’Snowth, now red with embarrassment clicked off the site, and took off his head phones.

    THEPRAWNCRACKER: (Laughing hysterically) Aw yeah, now that’s how you lay an egg!

    VIC ROMANO: (Laughing hysterically and tearing) Yeah, they it’s not over till the fat lady sings, but in this case, it’s over because the fat boy sang!

    D‘SNOWTH: HEY!

    Seconds later MrsPepper stormed into the room.

    MRSPEPPER: Hey! Hey! Hey! What’s all the commotion out here?

    TOGETHERAGAIN: (Catching her breath) Oh nothing, just Snowthy making us laugh is all.

    MRSPEPPER: And how is he doing that?

    VIC ROMANO: (Catching his breath) By singing like some sort of drugged up nun over the PA system! Ha ha!

    MRSPEPPER: Oh that was DS? That’s a relief, for a minute there, I thought my computer speakers went on the blink. Well D’Snowth, what do you have to say for yourself?

    D’SNOWTH: It’s not my fault! I was sitting here in my happy place, lost in the void of my mind, and next thing I know everyone’s standing there laughing at me and saying I was singing over the PA system when I haven’t even touched since you told me not to unless announcements had to be made.

    MRSPEPPER: Well then, I can certainly see why one wouldn’t pull a prank like that on themselves...so who here DID flip of the PA system while D’Snowth was...err...well, you know what I mean?

    The others then stopped laughing completely, and looked at each, trying to figure out who really did do it. However, Vibs could still be heard snickering quietly to herself. This then didn’t go unnoticed by the others.

    MRSPEPPER: Vibs? Is there something you would like to share with the others?

    VIBS: (Pulls herself together) Oh, ugh, no ma’am. Not a thing.

    Just then, Beauregard entered the scene.

    BEAUREGARD: Hey Vibs, that prank was so hilarious! Boy I’d hate to be in D’Snowth’s shoes right now, ha ha!

    VIBS: BEAU!

    OTHERS: VIBS!

    MRSPEPPER: I’ve seen enough. Now everyone, get back to your offices and get back to killing those threads, but Vibs, before you’re dismissed, I’d like you to apologize to D’Snowth for embarrassing him.

    VIBS: (Sighs) I’m sorry D’Snowth.

    D’Snowth simply nodded.

    MRSPEPPER: Alright Vibs, you’re dismissed. (Turns to D’Snowth) Now D’Snowth, to avoid this again, you want to burn that song on a CD or something, that’s the 40th time this week you’ve played here!

    Moments later, everyone was in the cafeteria for lunch. Today’s special was “chicken soup”, but in reality, it was chicken gravy (aka “Custodian’s Surprise) in large Styrofoam cups passed off as soup. ThePrawnCracker was having a hard time opening his cup, but eventually he did, only to find a large fake snake pop out of it. Terrified, ThePrawnCracker fell out of his seat, and everyone rushed over to help him, except for Vibs, who was busy laughing at her latest prank.

    VIC ROMANO: You okay?

    THEPRAWNCRACKER: No, I just lost my lunch...LITERALLY!

    TOGETHERAGAIN: We need to do something about Vibs! She’s getting back into her Joke Killer habit, and this time, she’s carrying it too, too far!

    Commercial Break.

    Later that afternoon, Vic Romano, ThePrawnCracker, and TogetherAgain were in MrsPepper’s office complaining about Vibs’s joke killing spree. No order was going on here until MrsPepper pulled out her air horn and blew it, quieting everyone in the room.

    MRSPEPPER: Now look, I can see you all are annoyed with Vibs’s little phase here, well frankly I am too, that’s why I’m getting ready to have a little discussion with her. (Pushes intercom button) D’Snowth, would you send Vibs into my office please?

    So moments later...

    MRSPEPPER: Vibs, this joke killing spree you’re going on right now is driving everyone in this outfit, including myself, crazy! Now I’ll admit it was funny in the beginning, but have officially taken it too far! Now, you’re playing pranks on everyone here, and there’s nothing funny about pulling pranks on someone, especially when it could hurt someone. Now I know it’s hard for you NOT to kill jokes, it’s something you’re good at, but as your commanding officer, I order you to put a stop to this joke killing spree, is that understood?

    VIBS: (Innocently) Yes MrsPepper.

    MRSPEPPER: Good! Now get back to killing those threads!

    Several minutes later everyone was killing their threads when suddenly, Vic, PrawnCracker, and TogetherAgain all received “apology PM’s” from Vibs. They opened them and read the following message: “Dear friends, I would like to say I am terribly sorry for annoying you all with the joke killing. I would to show you all how truly sorry I am, by providing you all this link to some good clean family fun. MrsPepper was quietly filling out a form in her office when she suddenly heard “AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH OMG!!! OMG!!! AHHHHHHHHHOMGAHOMGOMGAHHHHHHHHHHOMGAHHHOAAAAAAAAAAAAAMAAAAAAAAAAGAHHHHHHHH!!!” She then came rushing out of her office, and down the hallway to find Vic, ThePrawnCracker, and TogetherAgain on the floor, completely pale from the terrifying PM they received from Vibs.

    MRSPEPPER: Would somebody please tell me what’s going on here?

    The three were too petrified to even speak, but MrsPepper could tell what was going on when she began to hear guffaws of laughter coming from Vibs’s office. A peak inside confirmed her suspicions as she found Vibs rolling on the floor and laughing.

    MRSPEPPER: This has officially gone on far too long. It’s time to put a permanent stop to this FOR GOOD!

    The others managed to pull themselves together.

    TOGETHERAGAIN: MrsPepper, how can we possibly put a stop to this? Vibs is literally un-stoppable right now!

    MRSPEPPER: No need to worry, all Vibs needs is a good taste of her own medicine! Now here’s what we’ll do...

    They then huddled together to formulate a prank of their own to get back at Vibs. Several minutes later Vibs’s office phone rang, so she answered it.

    VIBS: Watermelons and cheese!

    It was Vic calling from his office.

    VIC ROMANO: Hey Vibs, I seemed to have forgotten to give you one last piece of paperwork to file, you can run in and pick it up.

    VIBS: Why can’t you bring it to me?

    VIC ROMANO: Oh, uh...I’m on the other with...uh...the 1740th, and it’s a business call, so uh...you’ll have to come get it yourself...

    VIBS: Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...okay!

    With that, Vibs hung up and exited her office, only to find herself hosed by MrsPepper and TogetherAgain.

    MRSPEPPER: Now that’s what I call being all washed up!

    Then, that was followed by a silly sting attack by Vic and Prawnie.

    VIC ROMANO: Well, there are those who say “a world without string is chaos!”

    Finally, those were followed by a “Kick Me“ sign by Beauregard.

    BEAUREGARD: (Kicks Vibs in the butt)

    VIBS: OW!

    This really ticked off Vibs.

    VIBS: (Ticked off) HEY! WHAT’D YOU DO THAT FOR?

    MRSPEPPER: Because we wanted to have a good laugh at someone else’s expense too!

    Suddenly there was an awkward pause.

    VIC ROMANO: You know something, I thought this would be a lot funnier?

    THEPRAWNCRACKER: Me too. How come no one’s laughing?

    TOGETHERAGAIN: Perhaps it’s because practical jokes aren’t funny no matter what role you play in it: the prankster, or the pranks tee.

    MRSPEPPER: So Vibs, since our message didn’t seem to get through to you, we decided to give you a taste of your own medicine. Did our message come through loud and clear this time?

    Vibs sadly nodded, then walked back into her office and started to throw her joke books away.

    MRSPEPPER: Vibs? What are you doing?

    VIBS: (Sadly sighs) Getting rid of all of my joke business.

    MRSPEPPER: Why?

    VIBS: To make sure I never kill another joke again!

    MRSPEPPER: Sweetheart, we don’t want you to stop killing thread COMPLETELY, we just want you to stop killing PRACTICAL jokes. We love the way you kill old jokes and make up your own corny ones, that’s what makes you so...well...Vibsy!

    TOGETHERAGAIN: Yeah, and besides you’ve worked long and hard to build up your joke-book library! Some of those aren’t even being printed anymore.

    MRSPEPPER: So you see Vibs? We wanted you to stop killing practical jokes on everyone, but since you wouldn’t listen to us, the only way we could get through to you was to pull a prank on you so you could see the light.

    VIBS: So I can still kill jokes?

    MRSPEPPER: Any non-practical joke you like!

    VIBS: And I can keep my joke books?

    MRSPEPPER: Of course!

    Vibs paused for a minute, then stepped out of her office and faced everyone else, who now had smiles on their faces, knowing that Vibs had finally gotten the message.

    VIBS: I’m really sorry you guys! I’m really, really, really sorry! Can you guys ever forgive me?

    MRSPEPPER: I most certainly will be delighted to forgive you Vibs! How about the rest of you?

    Everyone else happily nodded their heads and forgave Vibs in murmurs.

    Commercial Break.

    Later that evening, Vibs, now dried off and in a clean uniform, was making a public promise to the rest of the thread killers.

    VIBS: ...And I promise I’ll never play mean pranks like that on any of you guys ever again!

    MRSPEPPER: That’s good Vibs, never push a good thing too far. Well, it’s just about closing time, so we’ll have to skip the progress report for tonight, but we’ll have to double it tomorrow, so you guys can get ready to go home now.

    With that, everyone returned to their offices to turn in for the night. MrsPepper naturally had to go through D’Snowth’s office to get to her office, so as she entered D’Snowth’s office, she found him dancing around the office like a weirdo, with his speakers on full blast, and still singing horribly off-key to “To Make a Man”.

    D‘SNOWTH: (Dancing goofy-like and singing horribly off-key) ...TO MAKE A MAN! TO MAKE A MAN! TO MAKE MAN! TO MAKE A MAN! TO MAKE A MA-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-N!

    MRSPEPPER: (Shakes her head) D’Snowth, there is something seriously wrong with you, boy! First of all that makes the 52nd time you’ve worn that song out, secondly you need to actually see Getting Along Famously so you can see how you’re supposed to dance while you sing, and lastly, get yourself a CD, burn that song of said CD and listen to it at home to yourself quietly so you can stop embarrassing yourself, myself, and the rest of Canada!

    D‘SNOWTH: Aw, MrsPepper...

    MRSPEPPER: D’SNOWTH!

    D‘SNOWTH: (Sighs) Okay.

    MrsPepper then gave D’Snowth a nod of satisfaction, and headed towards her office.

    MRSPEPPER: (Singing quietly to herself) What does it take to make a man?/What does it take to make a woman?...

    The actual song “To Make a Man” as sung by Kathy Greenwood and Debra McGrath continues playing during the closing credits.

    THE END

    Executive Producer: Phillip Chapman
    Producer: MrsPepper
    Head Writer: D’Snowth

    “Getting Along Famously” is TM of and (c) GAF 1 Productions/Canadian Accents Inc.

    Songs
    “To Make a Man”
    Performed by: D’Snowth & MrsPepper

    “To Make a Man”
    Courtesy of Donald Quan, Greg Morrison, and Lisa Lambert
    Performed by: Debra McGrath & Kathryn Greenwood​
  2. D'Snowth

    D'Snowth Well-Known Member

    Sorry for the double post, but I have some commentary to add...

    1. I was actually going to post the same link that Vibs sent out in the PM's in the script so you guys could be taken by surprise as well, but since the only place I know where the link's at is at Whoserville, and since I was wrongfully banned from there, I can't add it. It WAS in the original, wiped-out script though.

    2. I'm afraid MrsPepper will be the only one around here who understands the whole "To Make a Man" bit.

    3. Speaking of who, never heard back from you Pepper, so I went ahead and decided that we all have her hosed, and silly strung, and kick me'd.

    4. You know what the best part was? I was barely in this episode!
  3. I loved it! It's awesomerific. Especially when you started singing :p

    101 stars out of 100.
  4. D'Snowth

    D'Snowth Well-Known Member

    Seriously, I CAN NOT sing! So if that really were to happen, I'd probably scare everyone into thinking someone really WAS dying.
  5. The Count

    The Count Moderator Staff Member

    Not bad... Good to see Vibs get a big role again. And her respnse when Vic called her on the phone, from SS itself.
    Hmmm, Debrah McGrath? Related to Bob by any chance?
  6. D'Snowth

    D'Snowth Well-Known Member

    Nope. She's Colin Mochrie's wife.
  7. redBoobergurl

    redBoobergurl Well-Known Member

    Ha-ha! I loved it, I was laughing so hard at the song and all the practical jokes, this was a great episode!
  8. The Count

    The Count Moderator Staff Member

    Ah yes... The man who made famous such phrases as "Instrumental!" when he couldn't really rhyme along his lines for one of the song/singing games, "Pants metal" and "I'm fluffing my Garfield".
  9. D'Snowth

    D'Snowth Well-Known Member

  10. G-MAN

    G-MAN Active Member

    This is cool, could you tell us what the link was though, since you can't show us?
  11. D'Snowth

    D'Snowth Well-Known Member

    It takes you to a page with a large picture of a HUGE hairy Austrailian spider, and the background sound was a bunch of "AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"'s and "OMG"'s.
  12. MrsPepper

    MrsPepper Active Member

    Nice job, Snowthers. However, you need to proofread these carefully, because there were some parts where it seemed like a word was missing here and there.
    The resolution was a little bit sappy, but the ending with you and I was really clever.
    And I loved the Getting Along Famously joke. ;)
    Overall not one of my faves, but some really good moments.
  13. D'Snowth

    D'Snowth Well-Known Member

    I find it rather amusing whenever I try not to write comedy, the results are always disappointing for both ends of the stick.

    Oh, and I proof-read and spell-check everything before posting. Where did I/it overlook?
  14. Vibs

    Vibs New Member

    Hey hi hello!
    Would you believe it - I haven't been here for ages and when I finally sign on there is a new T*K*O story starring.. me :)p) being the main-ish character..ish. Anyway, I sure was annoying good thing they all taught me a lesson there! hehe.

    Thumbs ip! ip? ip!!

    (up).
  15. D'Snowth

    D'Snowth Well-Known Member

    There's also a couple of other new episodes before this I believe you have yet to see.;)

    Anyway, how dare you make a fool of myself with my beautiful singing!
  16. Beauregard

    Beauregard Well-Known Member

    Beau: *danceing with mop* What does it take to make....er...man! I mean, man, er, that was good. Um! *leaves thread abrubtly with a *kick me* sign accidently taped to self*
  17. D'Snowth

    D'Snowth Well-Known Member

    *Kicks Beau*


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