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The Missing Muppet Movie

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction and Fan Art' started by ZeppoAndFriends, Jun 19, 2009.

  1. ZeppoAndFriends Well-Known Member

    This is an idea for a movie I came up with that I hope to pitch to Disney one day (and watch as they laugh in my face and throw me out).

    Basic plot: Kermit gets kidnapped.

    Since I have not yet begun to type it out I will leave you with the trailer.

    After the 'THIS PREVIEW HAS BEEN APPROVED FOR ALL AUDIENCES' screen it cuts to a raging sky.

    It is coming.

    Lightning flashes silhouetting an 'Indiana Jones' type explorer.

    The most evil and destructive force the world has
    the world has ever known. And there is only one man
    who can stop it. This summer prepare...

    There is a warping noise as the film begins to break. Another voice begins to speak:

    We interrupt this preview of a movie you actually care
    about for this important trailer.

    Cut to

    The news desk of an actual news program. The Newsman runs in and sits down.

    Here is a Muppet News Flash! The Wipe-A-Way paper
    towel company has gone out of business. When asked what
    they were planning to do with the surplus stock the
    company president stated, 'We'll find something to do
    with them'. As of yet they have not found anything to do...

    The Newsman is bombarded with rolls of paper towels and his co-anchor takes over.

    In other news the...

    A large furry arm reaches in and slaps a new piece of paper down in front of her.

    This just in! Kermit the Frog has been kidnapped!

    Cut to

    A large group of Muppets grouped around a small TV set.


    Cut to

    A montage of clips from past Muppet movies.

    They've faced jewel thieves.

    Clips from 'The Great Muppet Caper'.

    They've faced con artists.

    Clips from 'The Muppets Take Manhattan'.

    They've faced classic literature.

    Clips from 'The Muppet Christmas Carol' and 'Muppet Treasure Island'.

    They've faced...fast food franchises?

    Clips from 'The Muppet Movie'.

    But now, when their leader is taken...

    Cut to

    Miss Piggy, who is clinging to the roof of the kidnapper's getaway car.

    I'll teach you to mess with my frog!

    ...they'll do anything...

    Cut to

    Fozzie Bear is walking across the roof of an abandoned warehouse wearing a pair of Muppet Labs Magnetic Shoes.

    ...to take him back.

    Cut to

    Pepe and Animal facing down one of the kidnapper's henchmen.


    The henchman passes out.

    That was disgusting, okay.

    Prepare for action.

    Cut to

    A spectacular car chase scene in which Gonzo is seen hanging from the passenger side window of the car that The Muppets are driving.

    Prepare for romance.

    Cut to

    Kermit and Piggy sitting in a darkened movie theater inches away from kissing each other.

    Prepare for...

    Cut to

    Six rats in tuxedos doing a tap dancing number.

    ...dancing rats? What kind of movie is this?

    Cut to

    Statler and Waldorf in front of a black background.

    A bad one!


    The Missing Muppet Movie!

    I'm accepting suggestions for better titles.
  2. JEANYLASER Member

    That's good title! awesome beginning! I can't wait to read more suspense!:)
  3. ZeppoAndFriends Well-Known Member

    I don't think it's such a good title.:p I'm hoping someone can help me with a better one!

    Technically it's not the beginning. It's just a fake trailer (that I'm hoping to use IF it actually gets made).
  4. JEANYLASER Member

    I understand!
  5. ZeppoAndFriends Well-Known Member

    OK! :eek: I'm sorry if I over-explained it.
  6. Muppetfan44 Active Member

    The trailer was great!

    Definitely interested to see what happens

    I can't really think of anything for the title, the only thing that popped into my mind was Frognapped. Keep working on it, it sounds great!
  7. ZeppoAndFriends Well-Known Member

    What do you kind folks think about 'Muppetnapped'.

    That way it gets the word Muppet in there and gives the viewer an idea of what happens.
  8. JEANYLASER Member

    "muppetnapped" is a great title I love it! Here's another title idea "The Search for Kermit The Frog!"
  9. ZeppoAndFriends Well-Known Member

    Part 1

    I present to you the first part of what I have officially titled:


    (Thanks for the title suggestion Muppetfan44)


    Open upon the exterior of a building that looks like it has just been blown up. A MUSCULAR MAN (cameo) wearing a white T-shirt and jeans emerges looking no worse for wear, considering he had just been buried in a building’s worth of bricks and plywood. He reaches off camera and pulls in a GOREGOUS WOMAN (cameo). He then utters a cheesy typical-action-hero phrase.

    I told you I could handle it.
    That takes care of that.

    PAN AROUND to reveal that what we’ve been viewing was just a movie that a theater full of Muppets and people are also watching. PAN UP past the rows of people and Muppets. FLOYD and JANICE are sitting snuggled close together while ANIMAL sits next to them, noisily devouring a large bucket of popcorn. PEPE is trying to get close to the HUMAN WOMAN sitting next to him. CRAZY HARRY looks happy that something has blown up in this movie. THE SWEDISH CHEF has a pair of 3-D glasses on, despite the fact that the movie isn’t in 3-D. An unfocused LEW ZEALAND takes no notice as SWEETUMS plucks the fish out of his hand and eats it. DR. TEETH’S look is wide eyed but ZOOT is paying more attention to his feet than the movie. GONZO is trying to get the last Gummy-Thing out of his box while RIZZO sits next to him, lounging in a popcorn bucket. ROWLF is furiously scratching at his arm. STATLER and WALDORF have fallen asleep out of boredom. ROBIN has fallen asleep for completely different reasons. Upon seeing Robin asleep, SCOOTER checks his watch, accidentally dumping his soda out on his lap. SAM THE EAGLE is staring at the wall, his head set in his wing. BEAKER is watching the movie intently; BUNSEN is cleaning his glasses. KERMIT and MISS PIGGY are sitting next to each other. FOZZIE sits in the seat on the other side of Kermit. The noise from the screen suggests that the MUSCULAR MAN and GOREGOUS WOMAN are now playing a game of tonsil hockey.

    Isn’t it romantic?

    Yeah, if you don’t mind the explosions.

    Miss Piggy slowly leans over and puts her head on Kermit’s shoulder.


    Miss Piggy quickly sits up again. A few moments pass and she tries again.


    Great movie, huh?


    CUT TO

    The marquee blares ‘Hensonville Cineplex’ and shows a list of the playing movies, ‘Coo-Coo Nuts‘, ‘Call of the Mild’, ‘EXPLOSION: The Movie’, ‘From Here to Over There’, Phish and Chipper’, ‘Pointless 2’, ‘Much Ado About Something or Other’, ‘Steer Wars’, ‘Caps Locke’ and ‘Scouts 3: Urban Wilderness’.
    It’s a nice night. The sky is clear, the stars are out, the moon is full and there is a slight breeze blowing.
    PAN DOWN to see the front doors, just as the crowd spills into the parking lot. As the crowd of Muppets pass we can hear snippets of conversation.

    What has happened to the art
    of American cinema?

    I could’ve sworn I had Seymour
    with me when I came in.

    Sweetums follows Lew, humming innocently. Scooter is carrying the still sleeping Robin. Rowlf is still scratching at his arm.

    Hey, Rowlf, what’s wrong?

    I don’t think that my new flea shampoo
    is working.

    Gonzo is carrying Rizzo’s popcorn bucket with Rizzo still sitting in it.

    I think you need to lay off the midnight
    snacks, Rizzo. You’re getting kinda heavy.

    The head of a second rat pops out of the popcorn and there is suddenly upbeat party music.
    Hey, Rizzo! Are you coming back to the party?

    Yeah, I’m comin’.

    The rat disappears under the popcorn and the music becomes muffled.

    You’re having a party in there?

    Yeah, ‘scuse me.

    Rizzo disappears under the popcorn, too. Gonzo looks down into the bucket.

    Can I come?

    Beaker and The Swedish Chef are explaining something to Bunsen, who is hanging on their every word.

    Meep, meep mee-mee, mee-mee
    meep-meep mee mo (mimics explosion).

    Oh, dear!

    Und den de hurro mhen und de leddi
    ber de smoochie-smoochie.

    (snickers) I did miss something, didn’t I?
    (sigh) I should have cleaned my glasses before we left.

    Floyd approaches Kermit, dragging Animal on his leash.

    Hey, Kermit.


    Dr. Teeth was wondering if there was enough time
    to run the bus through the car wash tonight.

    Not tonight, Floyd, it’s getting pretty late, Robin’s
    already fallen asleep and…

    PAN OVER to the WOMAN Pepe was attempting to romance. A DRAMATIC STING plays as she comes into view. A fancy black sports car pulls up to her and she gets in.

    CUT TO
    Int.-Fancy Black Sports Car-Night
    The woman is sitting in the front seat with a BURLY HENCHMAN next to her, in the driver’s seat. A SHADOWY FIGURE in the back seat speaks:

    What did you find out.

    You were right, the frog appears to be the
    leader of the group. He’d be the most likely
    candidate. But there’s a small problem.


    The pig.

    The Figure looks out the window at the group of Muppets. Miss Piggy is karate chopping Pepe for some unknown reason.

    That’s a small problem?

    I’m sure a couple of out boys could keep her
    occupied long enough that we could make
    off with the frog.

    Are you sure? I don’t want any screw-ups
    on this. There is no second try!

    I’m sure. And another thing, I’m done with
    these up close surveillance jobs.


    That creepy shrimp kept hitting on me.

    Feel free to comment! Part 2 is coming soon!
  10. JEANYLASER Member

    I love it! Awesome!
  11. Muppetfan44 Active Member


    I'm glad you liked the title!

    Great opening. I liked how you described what happened before the dialogue and all of it was very on-character.

    This script idea is off to a great start...I can't wait to hear more!

    Keep up the good work!
  12. JEANYLASER Member

    :)Yeah! Me too! That title is awesome!:)
  13. ZeppoAndFriends Well-Known Member

    Is there anything you DON'T think is awesome? :confused:
  14. JEANYLASER Member

    I meant the title is awesome! Frognapped is a perfect title!
  15. ZeppoAndFriends Well-Known Member

    I was referring to the fact that every one of your posts that I've seen has had the word 'awesome' in it.
  16. JEANYLASER Member

    that title is so great! I love it!
  17. ZeppoAndFriends Well-Known Member

    The second part is close to completion! :excited:

    Soon it will be alive, ALIVE! Mwha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-h-a! :crazy: :scary:
  18. JEANYLASER Member

  19. ZeppoAndFriends Well-Known Member

    I am proud to present to you,
    (Self congratulatory fanfare)

    Part 2 of


    C.U. of the alarm clock on the nightstand in Kermit’s bedroom, the time is 7:30 and the alarm is ringing.
    PULL BACK to see Kermit in bed. He sits up, slaps the alarm clock to silence it, yawns and hops out of bed. He walks over to the door and opens it; the mayhem of the house explodes into view. Rats run along the banister right outside the door, Animal swings from the chandelier, chickens fill the air and Sweetums and Doglion run along the upper tier, batting away any chickens that come their way with tennis rackets. Kermit casually walks through the mess, toward the staircase. The is an explosion and Kermit ducks to avoid being hit by a flying Gonzo, without even breaking his stride. Another door opens and Robin comes out in his pajamas.
    Good morning, Uncle Kermit.
    Good morning, Robin.
    That was a great movie. I wish I could have
    stayed awake to see the end of it.
    Floyd walks by going in the other direction.
    Hey, Floyd.
    How goes it?
    Not so good. Animal is on the chandelier, again.
    Could you go get him down before he breaks it.
    I’ll get to it.
    Floyd walks off.

    Is somethin’ wrong, Uncle Kermit?
    Kermit and Robin begin to make their way down the stairs.
    Well, I don’t know. It just recently seems
    like everything in my life has gotten a little
    too predictable. Ya’ know?
    Not really, but, I’m only five years old.
    Well, I just think that…
    They are joined at the bottom of the stairs by Fozzie.
    Morning, Kermit!
    …,hi, Fozzie, my life’s gotten a little monotonous.
    Monotonous? Here? No offence, Kermit, but
    that’s being just plain silly. It’s probably all in your head.
    They stop in front of the kitchen, Kermit has his back to the doorway.
    I think Fozzie’s right, it’s all in your head.
    I don’t…duck…

    No sooner do they duck than an OCTOPUS comes flying out of the kitchen and sticks to the wall behind them. They stand up as The Swedish Chef runs out of the kitchen after it, wielding his favorite meat cleaver and his blunderbuss. Kermit casually steps aside to avoid being run over.
    …think so.
    Wow. Well, maybe all you need is a little breakfast.
    Chef’s made these waffles that are…
    Fozzie gives Kermit on a reassuring pat on the back.
    Yeah, maybe that’s all I need.
    Kermit walks off, still looking a little down. Robin turns to a disheartened Fozzie.
    I think what Uncle Kermit really needs is a vacation.

    To where? Where would you send a stressed
    frog to relax?
    I don’t know, someplace sunny. Someplace quiet.
    Someplace that’s warm. Someplace that’s
    away from it all.
    Fozzie and Robin begin to stare off into space.
    Away from it all.

    A purposely cheesy musical number featuring Kermit on vacation doing all kinds of fun and relaxing activities and singing about them the whole time. He is shown fishing, golfing, relaxing on a beach, scuba diving, riding his bike through a park, at a day spa, at a fancy restaurant, on the streets of Paris, taking a gondola ride in Venice, camping in the woods and, finally, in a hotel room enjoying a good book.


    Fozzie and Robin are still staring off into space. Pepe walks up and, after a few moments of looking confused, joins them.

    The ceiling’s not THAT interesting, okay.
    Fozzie and Robin suddenly snap out of their daydream.
    Why was jou staring off into the La-La Lands
    like that, Fotzie?
    We were trying to think of a place we could
    send Kermit on a vacation.
    Ah! I think I could help jou with that. I know a great
    travels agent, okay. Here’s his card.
    Pepe pulls out a business card and hands it to Fozzie.
    It reads:
    Get-A-Way Travel Agency
    Sending you on your way since 1976
    Agent Phil A. Bologna
    Call 1-800-555-SCAM

    The best parts is I get twenty dollars for every
    ones I refer, okay.
    Fozzie and Robin both look a little uncertain.
    I not sure about this, Fozzie.
    Are you sure about this guy?
    Sure, sure, he’s a great guy. He can get, for jou,
    transportation to anywheres you’d want to go, okay!

    CUT TO

    The office is small with only the desk of PHIL A. BOLOGNA in it in front of a large sign on the wall that reads the same as the business card. Phil is a cowardly snake in the grass with the demeanor of a used car salesman who looks like he’d be more comfortable walking around in his underwear than in the suit he’s wearing. He stands behind his desk with a wide grin on his face. Pepe, Fozzie, Gonzo, Rizzo and Robin stand in front of his desk looking a little out of place.
    I can get you transportation to anywhere you’d
    want to go!
    Si, this is what I tells them, okay.
    Phil suddenly goes from sickeningly happy to frighteningly angry.

    Can it, kiss up.
    He suddenly shifts back to happy.
    So where can I send you today?
    Well, Mr. Baloney…

    Phil is suddenly angry again.

    It’s Bo-LOG-na! Just because my name is spelled like the lunch-meat
    doesn't mean it’s pronounced that way!
    This guy’s off his nut.

    I know. And I thought I was crazy.

    Phil takes a couple of deep breaths and regains his composure before putting on his freaky smile again.

    So, as I was saying, where can I send you today.
    Well, we were hoping to find a nice quiet place we
    could send our friend on vacation.
    I know just the place!
    Phil opens one of his desk drawers and pulls out a dusty brochure.
    The beautiful, sunny…
    He slams the brochure on the desk, creating a cloud of dust and causing The Muppets to jump.
    …South Pole!
    I think we should go somewhere else.
    Wait! I've got it!
    He pulls out another brochure and slaps it down on the table.
    The Muppets, minus Pepe, shake their heads. Phil pulls out another one and puts it on the desk.
    The Bermuda Triangle?
    Phil begins to pull out brochure after brochure, getting more and more desperate and slumping lower and lower onto his desk with each one.
    Albuquerque! Moscow! The Sahara desert!
    Loch Ness! Treasure Island! Munckinland!
    The Underground City of the Mole People!
    The lost city of Atlantis! Cleveland!

    The Muppets, again minus Pepe, turn to leave. Phil continues to pull out brochures.
    Pismo Beach? Sesame Street? Fort…Oh, never mind.
    He slams his head down on the desk throws the brochure at the wall, it bounces off and lands right in front of Robin who picks it up. Robin turns back to Phil.
    What’s this place?
    Phil instantly perks up, but does not regain his happy-peppy attitude.
    What? Fort Bragg? It’s a town in Northern California.
    I get a good deal at a rental car place there.
    Well, it’s just what we we’re thinking of!
    Fozzie takes the brochure from Robin.
    It is?
    It is?
    Incredible, okay!
    Phil suddenly hops up from his desk and regains his used car salesman demeanor.
    Well then! Let’s talk airfare.

    Part 3 coming soon(er or later)!

  20. Muppetfan44 Active Member

    Definitely love everything that I'm reading so far.

    Keep up the good work and post more soon!

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