The Quote Thread

From the same episode:

Captain Compost Heap: So you see, boys and girls, if you're not nice to Mother Nature, she'll kick our butts.

"Mother Nature doesn't care about southern people." ~ Me, in the style of Kanye West ranting about George Bush not caring about black people

Database: "This is the life we chose!"

Squidward: I just want... (he bangs on the table making the glass of coffee spill on him)
Spongebob: Coffee Rain!!
Squidward: It's hot chocolate.
Spongebob: Chocolate Rain!!

(Spongebob Squarepants: Boating Buddies)

Dilbert: "Where am I?"
Da Vinci: "I am Leonard de Vinci, head of the five families of art."
Dilbert: "I have two problems with that answer: One, it's not the answer to "where" and two, I'm pretty sure you died 500 years ago."

"Aiya! What big stone! Why you all watch stone? Is stone edible? Or is for barbecue? No answer... You no answer, so you no mind, right?" [licks the stone] "Hm... is very salty."
- Quina Quen, Final Fantasy IX

“You always have to plan ahead, ... We always are aware of what ore is around the corner.” - Jerry Nelson

Pointy-Haired Boss: "You may have heard that our company has been accused of unethical business practices."
Alice: "Is it because of the falsified business safety tests?"
Wally: "Is it because of the false stories planted in the media about our competitors?"
Dilbert: "Is it because of our crime family connections?"
PHB: "What? Are you saying those things are unethical too?!"

Filburt: Ed! Ed! You have been charged with treason. How do you plead, froggy-lips?
Heffer: He looks funny.
Filburt: Shut up! Ed, I am your conscience.
Heffer: I'm his conscience, too.
Filburt: What?
Heffer: Don't say I, say we.
Filburt: What?
Heffer: We! We!
Filburt: Oh, okay. Wee-wee!
Heffer: (laughing) You said "wee-wee"! Say it again.
Filburt: Wee-wee!

(Rocko's Modern Life: She's the Toad)

HEFFER: CHEWY CHICKEN IS PEOPLE! CHEWY CHICKEN IS PEOPLE! CHEWY CHICKEN IS PEEEEEEEOPLLLLLLLLLLLE!!!
FATHER CHICKEN: Whew! THAT'S a relief!

The Count: I am The Count. They call me The Count because I love to count things. Ah ah ah!
Guy Smiley: Wonderful! I'm Guy Smiley. They call me Guy Smiley because I changed my name from Bernie Liederkrantz.

(Sesame Street: Beat the Time with Count von Count)

"Nigel? Where is 'Freak City'?" ~ Sam the American Eagle

Fozzie Bear: (running onstage) Hiya! Hiya! Hiya! Hiya!
Audience: BOOOOOOOO!!!!
Fozzie Bear: (running offstage) Bye-a! Bye-a! Bye-a! Bye-a!
(Waldorf holds up a score card that says "1")
Statler: You gave him a "1"?
Waldorf: He's never been better.

(The Muppet Show: Diana Ross)

"Why you care about small things? World very simple place. World only have two things: Things you can eat and things you no can eat."
- Quina Quen, Final Fantasy IX

Olivia Robinson: Is everybody here? Let's count noses.
The Count: I will count them. One nose, two noses, three noses...
Olivia: No, no, no, I meant people.

(Don't Eat the Pictures)

"When did Canada get a black dude?" ~ Brad Loekle

Flint Lockwood: It's called the Flint Lockwood Diatonic Super Mutating Dynamic Food Replicator, or for short... (pause) the FLDSMDFR!
Sam Sparks: (trying to pronounce it) The flemina-is-a-fur?
Flint Lockwood: FLDSMDFR!
Sam Sparks: (still trying to pronounce it) Emma-ne-de-fur-fur?
Flint Lockwood: (Points to the first two letters on his computer) Fleh...
(moves down to the next letters) Suh...
(moves to the final letters) De-furf.
Sam Sparks: Oh.

(Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs)

"Brace yourself. It's like talking to those two old grumps from the Muppets."

-Argo

Mokey Fraggle: It was rapturous!
Red Fraggle: Is "rapturous" the same as "boring"?
Wembley Fraggle: I don't think so.
Red Fraggle: Then she's wrong.

REPORTER: What are you in town for, sir?
BULLWINKLE: I can't say.
REPORTER: Why did the World Economic Council call for you?
BULLWINKLE: I can't say.
REPORTER: How long will you be here?
BULLWINKLE: I can't say.
REPORTER: Why cantcha say?
BULLWINKLE: Cause I don't know!