The Quote Thread

"Call me MC Hammer, 'cause you can't touch this!"

-Me playing dodgeball

Rizzo the Rat: Ladies and gentlemen, the elves have left the building.

(Muppet Classic Theater)

KRAMER: Look at this... (Tears up Jerry's sandwich) Everywhere you go, they give you these shoddy, misshapen meats! I haven't had a decent sandwich in thirteen years!
JERRY: (Sarcastically) Neither have I.

Wembley: Singing that sad song made us MUCH too happy.

(Fraggle Rock: Don't Cry Over Spilt Milk)

'So you're my replacements, hunh? A dandy and a clown.'

- The Doctor

"It unscrews the other way."
- McGonagall, Harry Potter And The Order of The Phoenix

*At the movie theater, after about fifteen minutes of commercials and theater promos*
ANNOUNCER: Thank you for joining us, we hope you enjoy the movie.
OLD LADY SITTING IN FRONT OF ME: When?
ME:

Ross: What are you doing?
Chandler: Making chocolate milk. You want some?
Ross: No thanks, I'm 29.

from Friends

Penelope: You short changed me!
Hooded Claw: What did you expect? Honesty?
-The Perils of Penelope Pitstop

BRAIN: I don't think it's a good idea to show hitting on a kids' show.
FRANCINE: I don't think it's a good idea to show hair-growth fomula on a kids' show.

"There's no need to call me 'sir', Professor."
- Harry to Snape, Harry Potter and The Half Blood Prince

Dean: "Greendale is an all-inclusive school. Why don't we let Britta sing her awkward song!"

Imitation in the sincerest form of plagiarism. - ALF

Wait.......that's it?! - Many fans after watching the final episode of iCarly

Me (to my 5-year-old niece): Mila, I heard you just had a birthday. Happy birthday!
Mila: Thank you! Where's my present?
Me: Well Mila, I did get you a present, but I think I accidentally ate it.
Mila (smiling): No! Don't eat it! That's not nice!

Pierce: "You think I'm too old to make monkeyshines at a picture show?"

"I always hated Scratt, that little saber-toothed squirrely-thingy. He was always upstaging me, always stealing my lines..." ~ Ray Romano, on working on Ice Age

"Hi, I'm Bovegard." ~ Beau

Fozzie: Ok kermit, I'm ready for Bears in space

Kermit: Oh no, there's been a change.

Fozzie: But I thou-

Kermit: THERE'S BEEN A CHANGE!!!


-Family Guy Kermit and Fozzie

Harry: "I don't want to stay here overnight! I want to find McLaggen and kill him!"
Madam Pomfrey: "I'm afraid that would come under the heading of 'overexertion'."
- Harry Potter And The Half-Blood Prince