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TMS outline - Fernando Valenzuela - baseball

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by DTF, Aug 31, 2004.

  1. DTF

    DTF Well-Known Member

    I'm a huge baseball fan. And, while it's usually singers, they had actresses and comedians before, so why not a famous athlet. They just needed to go one more season for this superstar (at the time - wound up having the career of a very good pitcher, but not nearly a Hall of Famer) who won the leaague's top rookie and top pitcher awaard for L.A. in 1981:

    Opening: Theme song, Gonzo comes on to play trumpet, it gives the cavalry charge sound when he blows it, then the whole audience yells "Charge" aand a baseball comes from behind the curtain & hits him in the head)

    Backstage: Plot revealed to audience to move Dodgers back to Brooklyn, they left there for L.A. after 1957.

    1st song: As a parody of the song "Fernando" plays about the pitcher and his World Series victory, a group of these renegade muppets hijacks the stage and insists on making Dr. Teeth and company sing "Welcome Back," the theme from Welcome Back, Kotter, which took place in Brooklyn. They steaal a cannon and threaten to shoot chickens at people until they get their wish. Animal charges them and is knocked out by a flying chicken.
    The song disintegrates into a battle of chickens flying throught he air.

    Statler: That's the nuttiest game of Chicken I ever saw.

    Waldorf: Maybe we should call Colonel Sanders to lead an army in to clean them up.

    Statler: Yeah, he'd beat them but finger lickin' good!

    Kermit is trying to figure out what's going on while the fethers fly, it's revealed that there are people trying to take the Dodgers back. Sam the Eagle, in the spirit of American diplomacy, offers to negoiate.

    Veternarian's Hospital: Patient is a muppet who got injured in the game of chicken. Various puns about him being henpecked, hurt half as badly as if he'd been tarred and feathered (since he was just feathered), etc.. Finally ends with Dr. Bob (Rowlf of course) extracting a beak from the man. "Looks like there's one chicken who just couldn't keep her nose out of somebody else's business."

    "Final number" is pushed ahead to just before intermission, after a discussion on the settlement - Mupets will join Valenzuela, with him pitching, in a gaame back in Ebbets Field as the home team, for the rights to keept he Dodgers where they want.

    Muppet Labs: Robot pitcher to help the Dodgers for 1982; only problem is it throws 500 miles an hour, first makes a hole in Beaker when it throws, then before Beaker can get out of the way, ptiches another ball that takes Beaker's hed off.

    Song: Fernando & other muppets do "Take Me Out to the Ballgame" while everyone packs up to board the time machine.

    STatler and Waldorf makes jokes about trying to find themselves and warn their past selves not to ever watch the show.


    Pigs in Space: A Reggie Jackson home run ball has been infected by some strange vungus and become alive, pigs try to make a bat, special appearance by the Count from sEsame Street with the wrong kinds of bats thaat he unleashes, driving everyone "batty" aand making the problem worse.

    The ball game, filled w/jokes:
    Spider muppets in the outfield, better to catch flies;
    Kermit getting fooled easily by the opposing pitcher ("I'm just a rookie, I'm still pretty green")
    Fozzie at catcher trying to distract batters with lame jokes;
    Scooter getting confused for a Yankee shortstop w/the same nickname;
    Miss Piggy hitting one to the moon. "Maybe now that Jackson home run ball won't drive us all batty - it'll have a mate up there.")
    Robin being put in to draw a walk (with his size, his strike zone is the size of a pebble)
    Fernando knocking in the winning run, aa pinch-runner for Robin. (Yes, he hit quite well for a pitcher)

    Once game ends, the Muppets sing Talkin' Baseball


    Anyway, being such a big baseball fan, thaat's how I would have done a Muppet Show once.

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