Elmo's World parody - "The I's Have It"

DTF

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Or...It Couled Be Worse

I will again be very busy for a while, so won't be back here for a number of weeks - don't kno what number, though :smile: Definitely after vaacaation to lurk , anyway; I'm anxious to see how the All-Star stuff and the beginning of SS go.

But, before I go, someone said they wanted to see Elmo say "I" - so I wrote this one last parody to accomplish that. I didn't waant it to happen right away in the other one, but I figured here was a good time. Actually, I don't think my cousin would get this flustered - but it is only based on her, as I said int he comment about writing fanfic, so she can be a little different. Anyway...

Elmo’s World parody - the I’s Have It

(Cue Elmo’s World theme):

Elmo: Hi, welcome to Elmo’s World. Elmo’s so happy to see you. Guess what Elmo’s thinking about today. La-da-da-da! The alphabet!

(We see clips of past Sesame Street letter animations and segments)

Elmo: (With Kiersten & her older brothers & sister behind him). Dorothy’s thinking about the alphabet, too. (There’s a letter “I” in Dorothy’s fish bowl.)

(One of Kiersten’s brothers dips his hand in, pulls out the golden, crisp “I”, and eats it)

Boy *1: Sorry, that was actually a French fry I dropped in.

Boy #2: I sure hope you don’t go eating out of fish bowls in college this fall.

Elmo: And Elmo hopes he doesn’t like to eat goldfish in college. (Boy #1 pops a few goldfish crackers in his mouth.) Elmo means real goldfish.

Boy #3: Don’t worry, Elmo, college students eating goldfish went out with all those other fads nobody cares about. It’s like Furby and Beanie Babies.

Telly (entering): Hey, Elmo, look what I got. (Holds out bag)

Boy #1 (pulls a Furby beanie baby out): Oh, cool! Furry Furby beanie babies!

Telly: That’s right, furry Furby Beebee Babies. (Slaps foreheaad): No, I mean, Furby Furby beebee beebees…Bury Furry…Burfy…. Awww, I’ll never be able to say it!

Boy #3: Wow, that’s so cool, Furry Furfy beebee booboos.

Girl #1: No, it’s Burry Burby Beebee Booboos

Boy #2: No, burry furry beenie feanies.

Telly: Oh, no, I’ve jinxed everyone! Now nobody will be able to talk right! Ah, forget I was here, okay, Elmo? (Seems to bite fingernails): I’ve, uh, I’ve gotta peck a pack of peppled peppers…Aahhh! (Runs out, Kiersten says goodbye to her older brothers & sister.)

Elmo: Right. Where was Elmo before Elmo’s friend Telly brought in whatever it was that Elmo’s friend Telly couldn’t say?

Kiersten: Well, remember what I told you my name was when you talked to me?

Elmo: You?

Kiersten: Yes, to me, do you remember?

Elmo: Elmo just said you.

Kiersten: Yes, me…oh, yeah. (She giggles): Since you’re thinking about letters, I thought we’d go over your name, “I.” Because I and a are two special letters - they’re the only letters that are also words.

Elmo: They are? Why? How can that be?

Kiersten: It just is. Now…

Elmo: Wait: Elmo wants to see Mr. Noodle.

Kiersten: I want to see him.

Elmo: Good, ‘cause you‘d see him anyway. Shade, open up. (Shade opens.) There he is.

Kiersten: Mr. Noodle, I’m trying to teach Elmo about the word I. (Mr. Noodle cocks his head curiously, like a dog when his owner says something.) When you say your name, and talk about you doing something, what do you say? (Mr. Noodle holds up a sign with the word “I” on it.) There, see, Elmo? Uh, does he talk?

Elmo (shakes head): Elmo doesn’t think so.

(Mr. Noodle holds up a sign saying “I have a bad case of laryngitis.”)

Kiersten: Oh, that explains it.

(Mr. Noodle writes on a piece of cardboard, then holds the sign up after a moment - it reds “Catching, isn’t it?”)

(Kiersten holds up a sign that says “Yes.”)

Elmo: (Shade goes down) Maybe Kiersten should get a drink of water. (She does as Elmo talks more.) Elmo knows that joke from somewhere long ago, before Elmo was born, but Elmo doesn‘t know where Elmo heard it was.

Kiersten (putting the water down): Yes, well, after that…well, let‘s just go over the word “I.”

Elmo: What about it?

Kiersten: Well, you know that song, Do Re Mi. How Me is a name I call myself?

Elmo: Yeah?

Kiersten: Well, what do you think that means?

Elmo: That if Elmo is singing that song, Elmo calls Elmo me. Which doesn’t make sense because Elmo is Elmo, not me.

Kiersten (like Groucho Marx type, trying to wiggle her eyebrows like he would): You mean you’re not Elmo.

Elmo: Silly Kiersten. Elmo is Elmo, but Elmo is not me.

Kiersten: Okay, wait…if Elmo is not me, then me is not Elmo.

Elmo (as if that made all the sense in the world): Right.

Kiersten: But when you say me, when you’re talking about yourself, for me to say the same thing I have to use the name “you.” So if I were to say the same sentence, I would be saying Elmo is you, but you are not Elmo.

Elmo: But that doesn’t make sense.

Kiersten: That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you!

Elmo: Maybe if Elmo asks a baby, a baby will understand. (Elmo walks up to baby in a high chair as Kiersten sighs): Hello, baby. Baby, do you know the word “I?”

Kiersten: Elmo, you are asking a seven-month-old baby, who cannot speak a word of English except maybe Mama, to elaborate on the definition of a word, when in fact children pick up on a concept long before they can articulate a definition! It’s important to talk to babies to stimulate them, yes, but to ask a baby anything where they are required to give information is the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.

Elmo: Really? Hmmm, let’s see. Oh, Elmo did that out of order, anyway. Elmo wanted to ask the audience first.

Kiersten: Well, since we’re doing things out of order, why not play the alphabet song?

Elmo: Oh, okay. (Elmo goes to his piano and plays and sings) Al-pha-bet, alphabet, aaaalphabet…”

Kiersten: Elmo, that is the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard!

Elmo: Elmo thought asking a baby was the dumbest thing Kiersten ever heard.

Kiersten: Okay, correct that, it’s the second dumbest thing I’ve ever heard. But, even this baby knows the alphabet song is (sings) A-B-C-D-E-F-G…

Baby (In a really squeaky, w/ a child pretending to be a baby talking): That’s right, your song is dumb, Elmo.

Kiersten: See, even the baby agrees!

Elmo: But, Elmo can’t sing the alphabet to the tune Kiersten sang.

Kiersten: And why not?

Elmo: Because, that’s the tune to “Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star.”

Kiersten: Yes, it is. In fact, the same man probably wrote both songs as a child. His name was Mozart. And, he wrote his first song at age 3.

Elmo: Wow! But, Elmo is three, and Elmo has never written a song.

Kiersten (hands on her hips, a little like Groucho again): I’m not surprised, Elmo has never even talked in first person!

Elmo: Oh, is that why? So, if Elmo learns to talk in first person, then Elmo can write a song?

Kiersten (excitedly): Yes, yes, that would be a very nice reward. If you learn to talk in first person, you may write a song.

Elmo: Oh boy! Then Elmo would be just like Mozart! Tell Elmo how. Elmo wants to be just like Mozart!

Kiersten (looking up): What am I doing? (To Elmo): Okay, now, you want to write a song, right, Elmo?

Elmo: Yes, Elmo wants to write a song.

Kiersten: All right, to say that right, you need to call yourself by the name of “I.”

Elmo: Oh, that’s easy. I wants to write a song.

Kiersten: You want to write a song.”

Elmo: Yes, I does.

Kiersten (to the camera): Well, I did get him to say “I”, the rest will come.

Elmo: Now, I will be just like Mozart, and write songs for all Elmo’s friends. And then I will be famous and sell lots of records and all Elmo’s friends will buy them and I can be driven around in a limo and…and…

Kiersten (as Telly walks back in with Big Bird and several others, Elmo goes over to his piano): Oh no.

Elmo: Guys, Kiersten said I could write a song now that I talks in first person. (Plays the piano to the tune of Jingle Bells) First person, first person, fi-irst pe-erson. How’s that?

Big Bird: Welll…it could use a few more words.

Susan: And a different tune.

Elmo: But, Elmo doesn’t know any other words.

Telly: Wait, how ’bout this - I wanted to show you. I can say it now.

Elmo: Say what?

Telly: Furby beebee bobby booties of course…Argh! I said it a minute ago out on the street!

Gordon: We know, Telly. Uh, look, Elmo, well…don’t quit the day job just yet, okay.

Elmo: Okay. Maybe next year.

Big Bird: Right, next year maybe you’ll write a song…

Gordon: Or at least by the next century.

Elmo: Does this mean I can go back to using Elmo’s name?

Kiersten: Uh…we’ll talk about it. (as Elmo’s closing theme plays, turns to camera): Well, I guess it could be worse. You all didn’t really want Elmo to go around thinking he was a child prodigy, did you? (Elmo sings “thaaaat’s Elmo’s world!”)

---------------------

Scene shifts to Oscar tucking Slimey in bed)

Oscar: Yeah, I agree, Slimey. One thing about Elmo thinking he was Mozart, it’d probably make the fans a lot grouchier; at least that would be fun.


Thanks for your time and attention, and feel free to enjoy some of my other writings on fanfiction.net under the author name "Me." Just go to the Peanuts forum, it'll be easy to search for me there, and then click on my author name to see all my stories. Also a lot in Full House, soem Calvin & Hobbes, and a variety of others - including a Hamlet/Lion King crossover! So long, for now, and God Bless.
 

Beauregard

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Haha! This is funny, and humerous, and made me laugh. I love how people pick on Elmo so!
 

TogetherAgain

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<snicker> I like I like I like.

<gets evil idea> Lisa likes Lisa likes Lisa likes.
 
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