The Many Many MANY loves of Zeus
"The First Sex Addict?"
Heehee, I just love the tone of "The Idiot's Guide to Classical Mythology"---it has the funniest tone of my Greek myth books.
Among the immortals, Zeus had 7 "biggie" relationships, all leadin' up to his eventual marriage with his Hera. Here we go:
"If Zeus had one flaw (and most of the Olympians had at least one), it would have to be his insatiable lust. His mother Rhea recognized her son's enormous appetite for sexual intercourse and foresaw that it would create problems for both him and any wife he chose. So she initially forbade Zeus to marry."
Well, that didn't quite work---Zeus was furious at his mother's interference, so he threated to violate
her. Hearing this, Rhea immediately transformed herself into a vicious serpent, but Zeus did the same thing, tangled himself in a knot with his mother that couldn't be undone, and fulfilled his task. Rhea was number one of a looooooooooooong list of "sexual victims"...
The ocean nymph Metis became Zeus's first real lover. But when he learned that she would conceive a son greater than his father (a pattern seen before [Zeus overthrew his own pappy]), he took matters into his own hands---he asked Metis to try and transform herself into various things, and when she changed into a fly, he swallowed her pregnant self. After a while Athena was born, sprung fully-grown and fully-armored outta his freakin' head.
After Metis, Zeus made love with his aunt Themis, a titaness (the "biggie gods" before the Olympians came along). Themis bore the Seasons, Eunomia (Law and Order---Lol!), Dike (Justice), and Eirene (Peace), and the three Fates.
Next, Zeus took another ocean nymph, a sister of Metis's, Eurynome. She bore the three Graces.
Zeus slept with his sister Demeter after that, and their daughter was Persephone, who later unwillingly became Queen of the Underworld (and husband of her uncle Hades [brother of Zeus and Demeter]).
Zeus musta really liked his aunts---he slept with another one, the titaness Mnemosyne, and they made love for nine nights.
Their daughters were the nine Muses.
The sixth lover of Zeus was his cousin Leto, a daughter of a titan and titaness. Leto "gave birth to the most beautiful of all the Olympians: Artemis and Apollo" (they were twins).
And at last there was his sister Hera---vengeul, jealous, petty Hera, lol. They married, had children (Hebe, Hephaestus, and Ares), but their marriage was pretty rocky---most notably due to Hera's intense wrath at Zeus's flings and lovers, and their enusing children.
Yep, even after he got married, ol' Zeusy just couldn't control himself---he slept with
COUNTLESS females---both immortal and mortal---and even a few boys.
*pant, pant, pant*
Man, this god's hormones ain't easy to keep up with! Lol!
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