BeakerSqueedom
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*Looks at Eddie*Your on the coffee again. ;P
Kidding <3!
PLEASE DO! :3 updaatteee!
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Say Cheese!
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*Looks at Eddie*Your on the coffee again. ;P
Kidding <3!
PLEASE DO! :3 updaatteee!
TogetherAgain
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Is coming, is coming! Got two hands only! And believe me, that's a much greater disadvantage when you've got three minds to channel through those two hands. But, what can I say? Peoples is peoples... Now Rizzo, stop loading that cannon and get back into this chapter...
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Coffee? Never touch the stuff, unless it's some form of coffee ice cream. The strongest thing I drink is hot chocolate. And I haven't even had a single cupper since last January.
Now avast Ms. Claudia, we be preparing to board the enemy vessel and get our coveted treasure of more fanfic.
Now avast Ms. Claudia, we be preparing to board the enemy vessel and get our coveted treasure of more fanfic.
TogetherAgain
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<Frowns> Well if THAT'S the way we're playing... <grabs all fanfic and abandons ship>
<Takes one chapter of fanfic, puts it in a bottle, corks the bottle, and sends it out to sea> There. They get only what I give them!
<Watches a bird pick the bottle up and fly away, then accidently break the bottle in its beak, thus freeing the chapter to drift down into the water>
...Curses.
<Takes one chapter of fanfic, puts it in a bottle, corks the bottle, and sends it out to sea> There. They get only what I give them!
<Watches a bird pick the bottle up and fly away, then accidently break the bottle in its beak, thus freeing the chapter to drift down into the water>
...Curses.
TogetherAgain
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Chapter Twenty-One
“I am not trying to tell ya how ta live, Lizzy.”
Rizzo sighed and leaned against the wall.
“…No, I’m just sayin’- Lizzy- Just- Could you put Izzy on?”
Pepe scuttled into the kitchen. “Ritzo, are jou-“
Rizzo gave the prawn a dismissive wave. “You can not tell me she ain’t there, Lizzy. You’re attached at da tail!”
“Ritzo?”
Rizzo shook his head. “Izzy, Izzy, would ya please let me talk before ya start with da accusations?”
“Why would she do dat?” Pepe asked. “De womens never do such t’ings, hokay?”
But the rat was ignoring him. “I’m just sayin’, Izzy, that somebody should be- Yeah, I know, but wit’ 1,275 of us you’d t’ink somebody could- I’m on the other side of da country, Izzy!”
Pepe looked at him. “Who’s Itzy? Itzy and Litzy? Ritzo, Ritzo- one womens at a time, hokay? Trust Pepe on dis. It’s safer for everyone, hokay? Especially jou.”
“No, no, Izzy, I’m just- no, don’t hang up! IZZY!”
“See? I told jou, Ritzo,” Pepe said, shaking his head. “It’s safer for everyone if jou only have one womens at a time, hokay? Or h’at least don’t let dem know about each other…”
Rizzo groaned, hung the phone up, lifted it again, and began to dial.
“Finally! Jou’re off de phone, si?”
“No,” the rancorous rat spat.
“So what was dat call about, hokay?” Pepe asked.
Rizzo was listening to the rings at the other end of the phone line.
“Jou know, Ritzo,” Pepe said, putting a hand on the rat’s back, “Jou really shouldn’t call back when she is still so steamed…”
“Dat you, Blaze?” Rizzo asked of whomever answered.
“No, dis is Pepe. Pepe is talking to jou, hokay?”
“No, I- just- Dat’s not what I meant at all! Would you tell your wife to calm down?”
Pepe gasped. “Dios mio, Ritzo, jou’re dating a married lady? And de husband knows? Jou’ll get jourself killed!”
Rizzo sighed. “Look- why can’t you take care of her?”
“Oh, I see… He’s not a good man to her?” Pepe said. He swept his arms dramatically. “And so jou nobly come to her rescue to ride her into de sunset on white armor h’and a shining steed, si? De womens love dat, but de steed is so expensive d’ese days…”
Rizzo was shaking his head. “But ya gotta work it in somehow, Blaze! Who else does she got?”
“Jou, hokay?” Pepe said. “Why do jou want him to win her back so badly? She should drop de bad man and come to jou!”
“Look, I would, Blaze, but I’m too busy wit’- I am NOT a hypocrite!”
“Oh- hokay,” Pepe shrugged, “If jou are too busy, she can drop de bad man h’and come to me! Is she hot?”
Rizzo sighed. “Look- Blaze- she’s a nice old lady, and she-“
“Old?” Pepe reeled back. “Dat’s disgusting, hokay! Ritzo, what are jou t’inking?”
“I am not DODGING it, Blaze!”
Pepe shook his head. “Jou have strange taste in womens, hokay…”
Rizzo was nearly shouting into the phone now. “I’m on tha OTHA’ SIDE OF DA COUNTRY! Whaddaya want me to do? Drop EVERYT’ING and just hop on a jet? I don’t have that kinda cash! I can’t take that kinda leave!”
“Si, and dat’s more Gonzo’s kind of stunt anyway, hokay?” Pepe said. “But jou could talk to Kermin about-“
Rizzo groaned and slammed the receiver back into the cradle.
“FINALLY! Ritzo, are jou-“
“Not now, Pepe,” Rizzo grumbled as he picked the phone up again and began to dial.
“But Ritzo, h’I just need to ask jou-“
“Ezra?” Rizzo sighed. “Hey, it’s Rizzo…”
Pepe shook his head. “Dios mio, d’ere’s a t’ird man…”
“No, I’m not tryin’ ta- Ezra? Ezra- please, will you listen to me? Please?”
“Ritzo, Ritzo, jou should never beg to de t’ird man, hokay?”
“Oh, okay, well then um… Could you put Fuzz on?”
“So jou go to beg to de t’ird man’s friend instead? Ritzo…”
“No, no, FUZZ, not Buzz. FUZZ.”
Pepe shook his head.
“Dat you, Fuzz?” Rizzo asked. “It’s Rizzo. Listen, could ya do me a favor? Please?”
“Jou want de girl, so jou ask de t’ird man’s friend for a favor?” Pepe said. “What kind of a favor?”
“Yeah, I know dat’s what dey’re sayin’, Fuzz, but- No, I’m not askin’ ya ta do dat.”
“But Ritzo, jou may have to!” Pepe said. “Dios mio, why didn’t I ever t’ink of dis, hokay? Get de t’ird man’s friend on jour side!”
“Look, Fuzz,” Rizzo sighed, “Could ya just… pay her a little visit?”
Pepe did a double take. “Ritzo, dat does not sound legal, hokay? What kinda visit is dis? Even I have my limits, hokay? …Very loose limits, si, but still-“
“Thanks, Fuzz,” Rizzo said into the phone. He sighed. “Yeah, I know… Thanks… Yeah, later.” He hung up.
“DIOS MIO, RITZO, WHAT DE HOKEY POKEY DO JOU T’INK JOU’RE DOING?” Pepe burst at the rat.
Rizzo glared at him. “Mind your own business!” He marched towards the family room.
Pepe followed him. “Was dat phone call- d’ose phone calls- were dey what dey sounded like?”
“How should I know? I didn’t hear it!” Rizzo looked at the piano.
“But jou were in it!” Pepe pressed. “What is all dis about, Ritzo?”
“I don’t wanna talk about it,” Rizzo muttered. With you, he added mentally.
“Fine, fine, just h’ignore de king prawn, hokay!” Pepe snapped.
Rizzo looked at Rowlf, who was softly instructing Robin and looking at his colorful casts.
Pepe took a deep breath. “Ritzo?” he said. “What h’I came to ask is if jou’re going to come play any more poker, or if Clifford should deal jou out, hokay?”
Rizzo shook his head. “Yeah. Sure. Poker.” He followed the rat to the table where Kermit and Clifford were still waiting in tense silence.
“Finally,” Clifford grumbled as he began to deal.
“Jou shuffled, didn’t jou?” Pepe asked bitterly.
“After you had the deck? Of course,” Clifford said.
“Everything all right, Rizzo?” Kermit asked, frowning at the rat’s scowl.
“Yeah, sure,” Rizzo said casually. “Everyt’ing’s just fine.”
It was a stiff, tense game of poker that night. Everything was not just fine, and they each knew it, though each knew it for a different set of reasons.
“I am not trying to tell ya how ta live, Lizzy.”
Rizzo sighed and leaned against the wall.
“…No, I’m just sayin’- Lizzy- Just- Could you put Izzy on?”
Pepe scuttled into the kitchen. “Ritzo, are jou-“
Rizzo gave the prawn a dismissive wave. “You can not tell me she ain’t there, Lizzy. You’re attached at da tail!”
“Ritzo?”
Rizzo shook his head. “Izzy, Izzy, would ya please let me talk before ya start with da accusations?”
“Why would she do dat?” Pepe asked. “De womens never do such t’ings, hokay?”
But the rat was ignoring him. “I’m just sayin’, Izzy, that somebody should be- Yeah, I know, but wit’ 1,275 of us you’d t’ink somebody could- I’m on the other side of da country, Izzy!”
Pepe looked at him. “Who’s Itzy? Itzy and Litzy? Ritzo, Ritzo- one womens at a time, hokay? Trust Pepe on dis. It’s safer for everyone, hokay? Especially jou.”
“No, no, Izzy, I’m just- no, don’t hang up! IZZY!”
“See? I told jou, Ritzo,” Pepe said, shaking his head. “It’s safer for everyone if jou only have one womens at a time, hokay? Or h’at least don’t let dem know about each other…”
Rizzo groaned, hung the phone up, lifted it again, and began to dial.
“Finally! Jou’re off de phone, si?”
“No,” the rancorous rat spat.
“So what was dat call about, hokay?” Pepe asked.
Rizzo was listening to the rings at the other end of the phone line.
“Jou know, Ritzo,” Pepe said, putting a hand on the rat’s back, “Jou really shouldn’t call back when she is still so steamed…”
“Dat you, Blaze?” Rizzo asked of whomever answered.
“No, dis is Pepe. Pepe is talking to jou, hokay?”
“No, I- just- Dat’s not what I meant at all! Would you tell your wife to calm down?”
Pepe gasped. “Dios mio, Ritzo, jou’re dating a married lady? And de husband knows? Jou’ll get jourself killed!”
Rizzo sighed. “Look- why can’t you take care of her?”
“Oh, I see… He’s not a good man to her?” Pepe said. He swept his arms dramatically. “And so jou nobly come to her rescue to ride her into de sunset on white armor h’and a shining steed, si? De womens love dat, but de steed is so expensive d’ese days…”
Rizzo was shaking his head. “But ya gotta work it in somehow, Blaze! Who else does she got?”
“Jou, hokay?” Pepe said. “Why do jou want him to win her back so badly? She should drop de bad man and come to jou!”
“Look, I would, Blaze, but I’m too busy wit’- I am NOT a hypocrite!”
“Oh- hokay,” Pepe shrugged, “If jou are too busy, she can drop de bad man h’and come to me! Is she hot?”
Rizzo sighed. “Look- Blaze- she’s a nice old lady, and she-“
“Old?” Pepe reeled back. “Dat’s disgusting, hokay! Ritzo, what are jou t’inking?”
“I am not DODGING it, Blaze!”
Pepe shook his head. “Jou have strange taste in womens, hokay…”
Rizzo was nearly shouting into the phone now. “I’m on tha OTHA’ SIDE OF DA COUNTRY! Whaddaya want me to do? Drop EVERYT’ING and just hop on a jet? I don’t have that kinda cash! I can’t take that kinda leave!”
“Si, and dat’s more Gonzo’s kind of stunt anyway, hokay?” Pepe said. “But jou could talk to Kermin about-“
Rizzo groaned and slammed the receiver back into the cradle.
“FINALLY! Ritzo, are jou-“
“Not now, Pepe,” Rizzo grumbled as he picked the phone up again and began to dial.
“But Ritzo, h’I just need to ask jou-“
“Ezra?” Rizzo sighed. “Hey, it’s Rizzo…”
Pepe shook his head. “Dios mio, d’ere’s a t’ird man…”
“No, I’m not tryin’ ta- Ezra? Ezra- please, will you listen to me? Please?”
“Ritzo, Ritzo, jou should never beg to de t’ird man, hokay?”
“Oh, okay, well then um… Could you put Fuzz on?”
“So jou go to beg to de t’ird man’s friend instead? Ritzo…”
“No, no, FUZZ, not Buzz. FUZZ.”
Pepe shook his head.
“Dat you, Fuzz?” Rizzo asked. “It’s Rizzo. Listen, could ya do me a favor? Please?”
“Jou want de girl, so jou ask de t’ird man’s friend for a favor?” Pepe said. “What kind of a favor?”
“Yeah, I know dat’s what dey’re sayin’, Fuzz, but- No, I’m not askin’ ya ta do dat.”
“But Ritzo, jou may have to!” Pepe said. “Dios mio, why didn’t I ever t’ink of dis, hokay? Get de t’ird man’s friend on jour side!”
“Look, Fuzz,” Rizzo sighed, “Could ya just… pay her a little visit?”
Pepe did a double take. “Ritzo, dat does not sound legal, hokay? What kinda visit is dis? Even I have my limits, hokay? …Very loose limits, si, but still-“
“Thanks, Fuzz,” Rizzo said into the phone. He sighed. “Yeah, I know… Thanks… Yeah, later.” He hung up.
“DIOS MIO, RITZO, WHAT DE HOKEY POKEY DO JOU T’INK JOU’RE DOING?” Pepe burst at the rat.
Rizzo glared at him. “Mind your own business!” He marched towards the family room.
Pepe followed him. “Was dat phone call- d’ose phone calls- were dey what dey sounded like?”
“How should I know? I didn’t hear it!” Rizzo looked at the piano.
“But jou were in it!” Pepe pressed. “What is all dis about, Ritzo?”
“I don’t wanna talk about it,” Rizzo muttered. With you, he added mentally.
“Fine, fine, just h’ignore de king prawn, hokay!” Pepe snapped.
Rizzo looked at Rowlf, who was softly instructing Robin and looking at his colorful casts.
Pepe took a deep breath. “Ritzo?” he said. “What h’I came to ask is if jou’re going to come play any more poker, or if Clifford should deal jou out, hokay?”
Rizzo shook his head. “Yeah. Sure. Poker.” He followed the rat to the table where Kermit and Clifford were still waiting in tense silence.
“Finally,” Clifford grumbled as he began to deal.
“Jou shuffled, didn’t jou?” Pepe asked bitterly.
“After you had the deck? Of course,” Clifford said.
“Everything all right, Rizzo?” Kermit asked, frowning at the rat’s scowl.
“Yeah, sure,” Rizzo said casually. “Everyt’ing’s just fine.”
It was a stiff, tense game of poker that night. Everything was not just fine, and they each knew it, though each knew it for a different set of reasons.
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Funny as all get out. But I have a feeling this'll be explained in a further chapter. So get that Prawny of yours in here and please have him explain through review quoted names. Pwetty pwease? And hey... You know we gotsta have our fanfic... You'd be disappointed in us if we didn't nag the queen of naggers herself.
So take it easy, and thanks for the update.
So take it easy, and thanks for the update.
Fragglemuppet
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Jee, I wonder after Rowlf's physical accident, Gonzo's guilt and Kermit's, Clifford's anger, and Rizo's family problems, who'll be the next in the house to go a bit off?
I love this story, and am very excited to see what happens next!
I love this story, and am very excited to see what happens next!
theprawncracker
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*on the floor in hysterics* Oh... my... gosh... second time I read most of that phone conversation... and still as funny as ever. I said it before, and I'll say it again, best Pepe in a long time. I know I should give you a detailed review but it would mostly be "HAHAHAHAHAHA!"s, and I figured I'll wait until I can review something more meaningful and deep. 
(By the way, my favorite line is still "No, dis is Pepe. Pepe is talking to jou, hokay?", and plan to use it as my new catchphrase. "No, dis is Prawnie, Prawnie is talking to jou, hokay?")
(By the way, my favorite line is still "No, dis is Pepe. Pepe is talking to jou, hokay?", and plan to use it as my new catchphrase. "No, dis is Prawnie, Prawnie is talking to jou, hokay?")
redBoobergurl
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Pure hilarity! I love it! I actually felt bad for Pepe for once!
Fragglemuppet
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Pepe, what about poor Rizo?
I mean, sure Pepe was funny, but...
More please!
I mean, sure Pepe was funny, but...More please!