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The Muppet Show with special guest star Rex Harrison

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction and Fan Art' started by Gorgon Heap, Oct 11, 2002.

  1. Gorgon Heap Active Member

    TravellingMatt and Gorgon Heap present TMS with special guest star Rex Harrison!

    Here it is, the product of a week's work of imagination and collaboration. The Muppet Show, with our very special guest star, Rex Harrison.

    You may ask about the penguin gag repeated throughout the episode. Here is the story behind it, according to TravellingMatt:

    Around the time that My Fair Lady was rehearsing (for its initial run) is when he used the Penguin edition of Pygmalion (the play from which the show is derived) to see how much justice (or injustice) Lerner and Loewe did to the original script. He kept asking for his book by saying "Where's my Penguin?" and one time someone rolled a stuffed penguin (from a taxidermists) on stage.

    Here it is. Enjoy!

    SPECIAL GUEST STAR: REX HARRISON

    STYLE: SEASON FIVE

    COLD OPENING: Pops is excited that Rex is the guest, saying that he’ll class up the show. “Why do you say that?” Just then, Lew Zealand’s boomerang fish goes by, Gonzo enters, rehearsing an act, and Sweetums zooms by on roller skates, obviously out of control. He grabs on to Rex to try and stop, but ends up carrying him away by accident. Pops: “Typical. Some guest stars just get carried away on this show!”

    OPENING THEME

    Curtain: Kermit is interrupted by Sweetums, still carrying Rex. Kermit: “Hey! Watch out! Put him down, quick, before you run into the-” CRASH! “Light tree.” Rex enters, woozy, and talks with Kermit (and Statler & Waldorf)

    OPENING NUMBER: “Oh What a Beautiful Morning”- Uncle Deadly in gloomy old castle (with storm outside)

    S & W (singing): “Oh what a horrible number! Oh what a horrible day! We’ve got a horrible feeling, Deadly’s no Gordon MacRae!”

    Canteen: Rex asks Scooter for his Penguin. Gladys doesn’t put up with Rex’s proper English manner for long. Add to that Rex is fussy about the wine. They argue, and Gladys throws a tray at Rex... which misses him and knocks Scooter unconscious. Rex explains to Gladys that ‘his penguin’ refers to his Penguin Books edition of “Pygmalion”.

    Gladys: “Well it’s a surprise to me. I didn’t even know penguins could read!”

    SONG: “Suffragette City”- the Electric Mayhem plays and sings

    Dressing Room: Rex is sitting in his dressing room listening to classical and reading literature, when Beauregard enters.

    Bo: "Mr. Harrison, may I come in?"

    Rex: "Yes, Beauregard. I was just losing myself in some Mozart."

    Bo: "Uh, where did you want to go?"

    Rex: "No, no, Beauregard, it's only a figure of speech. I was saying that I was so overcome by this music's beauty that I got lost in it."

    Bo: "I got lost in Hoboken once. It wasn't fun."

    Rex asks Bo to do him a favor and look for his Penguin.

    Backstage: Sam is enthusiastic about Rex’s appearance on the show and is looking forward to the next number.

    SONG: “I’ve Grown Accustomed to her Face”- Rex sings, unaware that the girl is being accosted by the Luncheon Counter Monster; once it finishes the girl, it goes after him!

    Waldorf: “Ah that Rex Harrison is a great entertainer.”

    Statler: “Oh, indeed.”

    Waldorf: “What did you think of that number?”

    Statler: “Well, frankly I couldn’t stomach it.”

    S & W: “AH HA HA HA HA HA HA!”

    Backstage: Rex is in need of serious aid. Sam is disappointed and outraged about the way the last number turned out. He scolds LCM, who in turn goes after Sam!

    Rex: “Shouldn’t we help him?”

    Kermit: “Hmm, I’ll think it over.”

    Just then we hear Sweetums screaming, and then Sam too. Sweetums rushes by on his skates, still out of control, but this time he’s holding onto Sam!

    Rex: “Well, at least he’s safe now.”

    Kermit: “Yeah, from one thing if not another.”

    CRASH!

    Vet’s Hospital: Lew Zealand reveals that he’s not sick, his fish, Cynthia, is.

    The Swedish Chef: Rex and the Chef have a wine and cheese tasting (with talking cheese)

    UK Spot: “Someone’s Rocking My Dreamboat”- Fozzie sings, accompanied Rowlf; the piano hits an iceberg and sinks at the end

    Statler: “Well, you know what they say.”

    Waldorf: “The captain always goes down with his musical number!”

    S & W: “AH HA HA HA HA HA HA!”

    Dressing Room: Piggy makes a play for Rex, but he brushes her off, singing “I’m An Ordinary Man”.

    Curtain: Kermit introduces Gonzo singing “Sweet Molly Malone”, but forgets to add the most important part- he’ll be singing it while bathing a wolverine!

    Gonzo’s act: naturally, Gonzo gets mauled by the wolverine

    Backstage: Kermit: “Gonzo, are you okay?” “Are you kidding? I’ve never been better!” Rex enters, uncertain, to say the least, about his clothing number. He’s opposed to doing it but in the end gets prodded into it... with a cattle prod!

    CLOSING NUMBER: “Kansas City”- Rex performs with the jug-band et al

    Curtain: Rex: “Where’s my penguin?” Bo comes in, surrounding Rex with penguins! Rex, Kermit, Piggy, Bo, the Swedish Chef, Rizzo (in a smoking jacket), and half a dozen penguins gather around.

    Sweetums rushes into S & W’s box, almost falls over the ledge, grabs onto S & W to try and keep from falling, then falls with them.

    Waldorf: “Well, we may be going to the hospital-”

    Statler: “But at least we won’t be here next week.”


    Feel free to comment.
  2. Beauregard Well-Known Member

    That is sooo cool only I don't see why Rex isn't more Doctor Doolittly. I mean he could've been in vets hospitale singing Walk With The Animals.

    Beauregard
  3. Gorgon Heap Active Member

    One of those decisions you've got to make, I guess. The real Rex Harrison was apparently more like Henry Higgins than Dr. Dolittle.

    And anyhow, we set the style of this episode in the fifth season. Specifically we both pretty much agreed that it'd be kind of around the time of the Roger Moore episode, and Roger Moore already did "Talk to the Animals".

    Any other comments anybody? The reason I ask is so I know if we're doing a good job on these (and when I'm working solo, to know if I'm doing a good job).

    David "Gorgon Heap" Ebersole
  4. manoftheSTREET New Member

    Positively brilliant!

    I like how you used songs from "My Fair Lady" in the same episode as one of the best glam-rock songs of the 70s.

    Keep up the good work on all fronts!

    Sincerely,

    John "manoftheSTREET" Kilduff
  5. Beauregard Well-Known Member

    I thought he sung, Brain all the Animals!!!!!!
  6. Gorgon Heap Active Member

    corrected version

    The first one had some typos. I corrected them, changed a bit of wording, and added a few little things.


    SPECIAL GUEST STAR: REX HARRISON

    STYLE: SEASON FIVE

    COLD OPENING: Pops is excited that Rex is the guest, saying that he’ll class up the show. “Why do you say that?” Just then, Lew Zealand’s boomerang fish goes by, Gonzo enters, rehearsing an act, and Sweetums zooms by on roller skates, obviously out of control. He grabs on to Rex to try and stop, but ends up carrying him away by accident. Pops: “Typical. Some guest stars just get carried away on this show!”

    OPENING THEME
    Gonzo: fireworks come out of the trumpet as the lights go out

    Curtain: Kermit is interrupted by Sweetums, still carrying Rex. Kermit: “Hey! Watch out! Put him down, quick, before you run into the-” CRASH! “Light tree.” Rex enters, woozy, and talks with Kermit (and Statler & Waldorf)

    OPENING NUMBER: “Oh What a Beautiful Morning”- Uncle Deadly in gloomy old castle (with storm outside)

    S & W (singing): “Oh what a horrible number! Oh what a horrible day! We’ve got a horrible feeling, Deadly’s no Gordon MacRae!”

    Canteen: Rex asks Scooter for his Penguin. Gladys doesn’t put up with Rex’s proper English manner for long. Add to that Rex is fussy about the wine. They argue, and Gladys throws a tray at Rex... which misses him and knocks Scooter unconscious. Rex explains to Gladys that ‘his penguin’ refers to his Penguin Books edition of “Pygmalion”.

    Gladys: “Well it’s a surprise to me. I didn’t even know penguins could read!”

    SONG: “Suffragette City”- the Electric Mayhem plays and sings

    Dressing Room: Rex is sitting in his dressing room listening to classical and reading literature, when Beauregard enters.

    Bo: "Mr. Harrison, may I come in?"

    Rex: "Yes, Beauregard. I was just losing myself in some Mozart."

    Bo: "Uh, where did you want to go?"

    Rex: "No, no, Beauregard, it's only a figure of speech. I was saying that I was so overcome by this music's beauty that I got lost in it."

    Bo: "I got lost in Hoboken once. It wasn't fun."

    Rex asks Bo to do him a favor and look for his Penguin.

    Backstage: Sam is enthusiastic about Rex’s appearance on the show and is looking forward to the next number. The girl goes to the stage (as does something covered in a sheet.)

    SONG: “I’ve Grown Accustomed to her Face”- Rex sings, unaware that the girl is being devoured by the Luncheon Counter Monster (who was hiding under a sheet, disguised as a piece of furniture); once it finishes the girl, it goes after him!

    Waldorf: “Ah that Rex Harrison is a great entertainer.”

    Statler: “Oh, indeed.”

    Waldorf: “What did you think of that number?”

    Statler: “Well, frankly I couldn’t stomach it.”

    S & W: “AH HA HA HA HA HA HA!”

    Backstage: Rex is in need of serious aid. Sam is disappointed and outraged about the way the last number turned out. He scolds LCM, who in turn goes after Sam!

    Rex: “Shouldn’t we help him?”

    Kermit: “Hmm, I’ll think it over.”

    Just then we hear Sweetums screaming, and then Sam too. Sweetums rushes by on his skates, still out of control, but this time he’s holding onto Sam!

    Rex: “Well, at least he’s safe now.”

    Kermit: “Yeah, from one thing if not another.”

    CRASH!

    Vet’s Hospital: Lew Zealand reveals that he’s not sick, his fish, Cynthia, is.

    The Swedish Chef: Rex and the Chef have a wine and cheese tasting (with talking cheese)

    UK Spot: “Someone’s Rocking My Dreamboat”- Fozzie sings, accompanied Rowlf; the piano hits an iceberg and sinks at the end

    Statler: “Well, you know what they say.”

    Waldorf: “The captain always goes down with his musical number!”

    S & W: “AH HA HA HA HA HA HA!”

    Dressing Room: Piggy makes a play for Rex, but he brushes her off, singing “I’m An Ordinary Man”.

    Curtain: Kermit introduces Gonzo singing “Sweet Molly Malone”, but forgets to add the most important part- he’ll be singing it while bathing a wolverine!

    Gonzo’s act: naturally, Gonzo gets mauled by the wolverine

    Backstage: Kermit: “Gonzo, are you okay?” “Are you kidding? I’ve never been better!” Rex enters, uncertain, to say the least, about his closing number. He’s opposed to doing it but in the end gets prodded into it... with a cattle prod!

    CLOSING NUMBER: “Kansas City”- Rex performs with the jug-band et al

    Curtain: Rex: “Where’s my penguin?” Bo comes in, surrounding Rex with penguins! Rex, Kermit, Piggy, Bo, the Swedish Chef, Rizzo (in a smoking jacket), and half a dozen penguins gather around.

    Sweetums rushes into S & W’s box, almost falls over the ledge, grabs onto S & W to try and keep from falling, then falls with them.

    Waldorf: “Well, we may be going to the hospital-”

    Statler: “But at least we won’t be here next week.”


    David "Gorgon Heap" Ebersole
  7. Daffyfan2003 Active Member

    Reply

    That was good. I really liked the songs you chose, especially "Somebody's Rocking My Dreamboat" and "Kansas City."
  8. ryhoyarbie Active Member

    Any other comments anybody? The reason I ask is so I know if we're doing a good job on these (and when I'm working solo, to know if I'm doing a good job).

    David "Gorgon Heap" Ebersole [/B][/QUOTE]

    great job...i actually have 2 ideas for 2 differnet episodes of the muppet show, and they all involve characters past and present from rowlf, pops, etc. to johny and sal, pepe etc..

    i actually have an idea where paul mccartney comes to the show and johny and sal are featured heavily in the show and want to sing with paul but paul doesn't sing the type of music they sing which is like frank sinatra type stuff..

    the other one, don't have a guest star yet, is where different muppets pop up in different acts like having link, piggy and say lew zealand in pigs in space, or pepe, sal, and janice in vets hopsital, etc. or having seymore cooking instead of the sweedish chef, or having bunsen honeydew and phil van neuter doing muppet labs, etc....maybe i'll do some of these pretty soon...

    ryan
  9. Gorgon Heap Active Member

    Just FYI, and I was confused about this when Matt told me about the idea, "Kansas City" is the song from "Oklahoma!" ('they've gone about as far as they can go') not the Wilbur Harrison song ('I'm goin' to Kansas City, Kansas City here I come').

    Glad you folks all like it. It's my favorite of all the ones I've worked on. It's the mastermind theory at work.

    David "Gorgon Heap" Ebersole
  10. TravellingMatt New Member

    I thought of a gag we could add to this too. It'd be a Muppet Newsflash, and another My Fair Lady gag.

    Newsman: "Here's a Muppet Newsflash. Dateline: Madrid. The rain in Spain falls mainly on the plain, except for today, when it takes a sudden detour into the Muppet newsroom. Huh...that doesn't make sense..."

    (and naturally, he gets drenched)
  11. Gorgon Heap Active Member

    Right now, Matt and I are working on turning the outline into a full script. We're hoping to get some web space to start a Muppet fan fiction site, which you're all welcome to contribute to. Still investigating details on how to set one up cheaply, or free if possible, just without too many pop-up ads (one is ok I guess, more than that is irritating). If anyone's got ideas or suggestions on how to go about this, I could really use 'em. Also if anyone here is particularly skilled with Adobe Photoshop or some similar program, I'm looking for someone to make 'screencaps' for the 'episodes'.

    Script for The Muppet Show with Rex Harrison is coming along well, and it is going to be FUNNEEEE!

    David "Gorgon Heap" Ebersole
  12. Beauregard Well-Known Member

    I may be able to make some screen clips for you. Provided I can get some good pictures of Penguins... :zany:
  13. Gorgon Heap Active Member

    Just an update on the full script: the first draft has been sitting almost finished for over 9 months now (I started the script expansion almost exactly 11 months ago, so that part took me a span of not quite two months). Everything is done except for the Swedish Chef sketch, which I'm still not sure how to write. Maybe I'll figure it out in the next week or two. Dang, the things we leave collecting dust.

    David "Gorgon Heap" Ebersole
  14. Gorgon Heap Active Member

    I know! ;) That was one of the reasons we put them in there!

    David "Gorgon Heap" Ebersole
  15. Gorgon Heap Active Member

    Because I like it the way it is.

    I didn't realize until just today that Gladys only appeared in Season Three. Her replacement, Winnie, only appeared in one episode, so it's easy to forget.

    As for Uncle Deadly, true he didn't appear on TMS beyond Season Three, but there was no reason for him not to. That I view as happenstance, not as law. Same with Gladys.

    David "Gorgon Heap" Ebersole
  16. Gorgon Heap Active Member

    YES, I WOULD MIND. I'm doing it the way I want to do it, the way I envisioned it, i.e. REVIVING Uncle Deadly and Gladys for a Season Five episode because unlike say, George the Janitor who was replaced permanently by Beauregard, or Hilda whose performer retired from puppetry, there was no specific justifiable reason to get rid of the characters. True, they never did appear in Season Five, but there's no reason that can be given as to why they didn't. They weren't used a whole lot to begin with, so they were probably just forgotten, but COULD HAVE appeared in Season Five if the writers had so designated (i.e. were not written out of the show for a practical reason).

    I wanted it in Season Five b/c of the visual style. When I pictured Harrison on TMS in my head, it came out around the time when Glenda Jackson and Roger Moore were on the show, and with that same visual style (which can't be simply tranplanted into Season Three). If I were to switch, I'd have to re-do the cold opening, which btw leads into the first Kermit intro AND a running gag.

    Not to mention, I like it the way it is.

    So no, I'm not going to 'fix' the season thing to suit someone else's opinion of how it should be done. Why do you treat it like it's some kind of necessity?

    David "Gorgon Heap" Ebersole

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