TravellingMatt and Gorgon Heap present TMS with special guest star Rex Harrison! Here it is, the product of a week's work of imagination and collaboration. The Muppet Show, with our very special guest star, Rex Harrison. You may ask about the penguin gag repeated throughout the episode. Here is the story behind it, according to TravellingMatt: Around the time that My Fair Lady was rehearsing (for its initial run) is when he used the Penguin edition of Pygmalion (the play from which the show is derived) to see how much justice (or injustice) Lerner and Loewe did to the original script. He kept asking for his book by saying "Where's my Penguin?" and one time someone rolled a stuffed penguin (from a taxidermists) on stage. Here it is. Enjoy! SPECIAL GUEST STAR: REX HARRISON STYLE: SEASON FIVE COLD OPENING: Pops is excited that Rex is the guest, saying that he’ll class up the show. “Why do you say that?” Just then, Lew Zealand’s boomerang fish goes by, Gonzo enters, rehearsing an act, and Sweetums zooms by on roller skates, obviously out of control. He grabs on to Rex to try and stop, but ends up carrying him away by accident. Pops: “Typical. Some guest stars just get carried away on this show!” OPENING THEME Curtain: Kermit is interrupted by Sweetums, still carrying Rex. Kermit: “Hey! Watch out! Put him down, quick, before you run into the-” CRASH! “Light tree.” Rex enters, woozy, and talks with Kermit (and Statler & Waldorf) OPENING NUMBER: “Oh What a Beautiful Morning”- Uncle Deadly in gloomy old castle (with storm outside) S & W (singing): “Oh what a horrible number! Oh what a horrible day! We’ve got a horrible feeling, Deadly’s no Gordon MacRae!” Canteen: Rex asks Scooter for his Penguin. Gladys doesn’t put up with Rex’s proper English manner for long. Add to that Rex is fussy about the wine. They argue, and Gladys throws a tray at Rex... which misses him and knocks Scooter unconscious. Rex explains to Gladys that ‘his penguin’ refers to his Penguin Books edition of “Pygmalion”. Gladys: “Well it’s a surprise to me. I didn’t even know penguins could read!” SONG: “Suffragette City”- the Electric Mayhem plays and sings Dressing Room: Rex is sitting in his dressing room listening to classical and reading literature, when Beauregard enters. Bo: "Mr. Harrison, may I come in?" Rex: "Yes, Beauregard. I was just losing myself in some Mozart." Bo: "Uh, where did you want to go?" Rex: "No, no, Beauregard, it's only a figure of speech. I was saying that I was so overcome by this music's beauty that I got lost in it." Bo: "I got lost in Hoboken once. It wasn't fun." Rex asks Bo to do him a favor and look for his Penguin. Backstage: Sam is enthusiastic about Rex’s appearance on the show and is looking forward to the next number. SONG: “I’ve Grown Accustomed to her Face”- Rex sings, unaware that the girl is being accosted by the Luncheon Counter Monster; once it finishes the girl, it goes after him! Waldorf: “Ah that Rex Harrison is a great entertainer.” Statler: “Oh, indeed.” Waldorf: “What did you think of that number?” Statler: “Well, frankly I couldn’t stomach it.” S & W: “AH HA HA HA HA HA HA!” Backstage: Rex is in need of serious aid. Sam is disappointed and outraged about the way the last number turned out. He scolds LCM, who in turn goes after Sam! Rex: “Shouldn’t we help him?” Kermit: “Hmm, I’ll think it over.” Just then we hear Sweetums screaming, and then Sam too. Sweetums rushes by on his skates, still out of control, but this time he’s holding onto Sam! Rex: “Well, at least he’s safe now.” Kermit: “Yeah, from one thing if not another.” CRASH! Vet’s Hospital: Lew Zealand reveals that he’s not sick, his fish, Cynthia, is. The Swedish Chef: Rex and the Chef have a wine and cheese tasting (with talking cheese) UK Spot: “Someone’s Rocking My Dreamboat”- Fozzie sings, accompanied Rowlf; the piano hits an iceberg and sinks at the end Statler: “Well, you know what they say.” Waldorf: “The captain always goes down with his musical number!” S & W: “AH HA HA HA HA HA HA!” Dressing Room: Piggy makes a play for Rex, but he brushes her off, singing “I’m An Ordinary Man”. Curtain: Kermit introduces Gonzo singing “Sweet Molly Malone”, but forgets to add the most important part- he’ll be singing it while bathing a wolverine! Gonzo’s act: naturally, Gonzo gets mauled by the wolverine Backstage: Kermit: “Gonzo, are you okay?” “Are you kidding? I’ve never been better!” Rex enters, uncertain, to say the least, about his clothing number. He’s opposed to doing it but in the end gets prodded into it... with a cattle prod! CLOSING NUMBER: “Kansas City”- Rex performs with the jug-band et al Curtain: Rex: “Where’s my penguin?” Bo comes in, surrounding Rex with penguins! Rex, Kermit, Piggy, Bo, the Swedish Chef, Rizzo (in a smoking jacket), and half a dozen penguins gather around. Sweetums rushes into S & W’s box, almost falls over the ledge, grabs onto S & W to try and keep from falling, then falls with them. Waldorf: “Well, we may be going to the hospital-” Statler: “But at least we won’t be here next week.” Feel free to comment.