TMS OUTINE: Viggo Mortensen AKA "THE LORD OF THE ONION RINGS"

LadyHyde

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I haven't watched much of "The Muppet Show" in years, but seeing you guys do these outlines gave me an idea for my own. It's like the episodes with Julie Andrews and Brooke Shields where they act out an entire story for the show.

Opening-Dressing Room

Scooter walks in to see tonight's guest star, Viggo Mortensen, using a Fry Daddy.

Scooter: Mr. Mortensen?

Viggo: At last, the best onion rings in the world! Nine turned out pretty good, seven were a little burnt, five are kinda doughy, 3 are really burn, but one, one is PERFECT.

Scooter: Uh, Mr. Mortensen?

Viggo: (Turns around) Huh? Oh, I didn't see you there.

Scooter: Show starts in 5 minutes! Just want you to know!

Viggo: Oh, thanks.

Scooter walks out of the room.

Scooter: Wow, I've never seen someone obsessed with Onion rings.....

OPENING THEME: Instead of Gonzo's usual trumpet, he's in medieval garb with a long horn.

The formal opening begins like an old Disney movie, where a story book opens to Once Upon a Time. Frogo Baggins, his pals Fozwise, Gonzy, and Rowlfin have been entrusted to deliver the best onion rings in Sorta-in-the-Middle Earth to the evil lords, Souron and Sourman (Statler and Waldorf). They stop in an inn, where Aragorn is sitting by the fire. The four Muppets get a round of rootbeers, where they start to sing Chumbawumba's "Tubthumping". Badly. Aragorn gets up from his spot.

Aragorn: If you're going to sing that song, SING IT RIGHT!

Frogo: Who are you?

Aragorn: I am called Strider, but my full name is Aragorn, son of Isildur, cousin of Milton, best friend of Jake, college roomate of Dave, penpals with Kevin.....

The Muppets have fallen asleep.

Aragorn: HEY! Anyway, I've heard you have to deliver the Onion Rings to Souron and Sourman. I'll be your guide through the many perils.

Frogo: Sounds great, but maybe we should ask for some more help.

COMMERCIAL

We come back to the Muppets in Rivendell, with Gandeagle (Sam the Eagle), Bobomir, Linkolas and Rizzli joining the quest. Lady Pigwen throws herself on Aragorn.

Pigwen: I would give up my collection of designer originals to go with you!

Aragorn: Okay, but there's going to be a lot of rock climbing, orcs and mud.

Pigwen: On second thought, I'll wait here.

They finally get to the caves when they see a sign that says "Beware of Balrog".

Gonzy: I think they must've made a typo.

The Balrog, however, turns out to be Bill, the guy that shoots bubbles out of his head with a monster mask.

Bill: What, you don't think a guy that blows bubbles out of his head is scary?

At the end of the tunnel, they get to the palace of Souron and Sourman. They receive the onion rings.

Souron (Statler): I've never seen a plot so full of holes!

Both: Doh ho ho!

Curtain call-They all say their goodnights, when Scooter comes out with Viggo's Fry Daddy.

Scooter: No! You can't have it! This is my precioussss......

Kermit: I'm sure he'll be back to normal next time. Goodnight!

The end.
 

electricmayhem

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That's funny :smile: I'm just as obsessed with LOTR as I am with the Muppets so I like to see them brought together!
 
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