Amazon? Moi?

[Muppetfan44]

I totally agree with the prawncracker! I REALLY LOVED that chapter!

Kermit questioning why it comforted him to hold her was so wonderful! All of the other Muppets noticing too was great, usually everyone else knows before Kermit gets it.

and THE SPARKLE! The sparkle is starting to come back! That makes me so happy!

Please post more soon so Kermit can finally realize that HE LOVES HER!

*I LOVE this story by the way, in case you didn't know*

Please post more soon!

 

[The Count]

Good... More please. Sleepy Count, still have more threads/stories to go through.

 

[TogetherAgain]

Chapter Seventeen

When a week had passed since the press release, considerably fewer members of the press could be found on the front lawn of the Muppet Boarding House, due to a combination of the weather forecast and the passage of time.

Those who paid strict enough attention knew that Miss Piggy was slowly, very slowly, making a little progress. The tiny sliver of a sparkle in her eyes that Kermit had noticed proved to be intermittent at best, but she was, at the very least, flinching less, and sometimes looking at them a little more often, maybe.

The physical improvements were even smaller and subtler, if they were there at all. Even the initial steady growth of her appetite had slowed.

After lunch, when Rowlf was at the piano, Kermit quietly expressed his concern to the dog on this subject.

Rowlf slowly shook his head. "Physical doesn't mean visible," he said softly.

Kermit frowned. "It doesn't?"

Rowlf slowly shook his head again, and sighed. "She hasn't had the proper nutrients in a while..."

"Well, I know that," Kermit said, "She wouldn't-- look, the way she does, if--"

But Rowlf shook his head and sighed again. "Body fat only has so many nutrients by itself," he said softly.

Kermit frowned deeply, trying to process it. "...So..."

"...So," Rowlf said softly, "Body fat isn't all she lost, and isn't all she has to rebuild."

Kermit frowned at looked at where Miss Piggy was standing at the window. "...What-- ...What else... did she lose?" he whispered.

Rowlf kept his eyes on the piano as one of his paws strayed along the keys, delaying in his answer a bit. "...Some bone mass, probably. Some muscle mass. Possibly some organ tissue... Anything she could possibly spare."

Kermit swallowed hard. "...Organ tissue?" he whispered. "She could spare organ tissue?"

"Well, she couldn't spare the nerve tissue," Rowlf said softly. "Not saying she lost any organs... just-- they might be weaker."

Kermit watched as Miss Piggy gently pushed one of the drapes an inch or two over. "...But-- ...But muscle-- she needed muscle..."

"Not as much as she had, in the places she had it," Rowlf said softly. "And when she stopped climbing trees, there was that much less she needed..."

"...And… bone?"

"Less weight for her to carry, when she climbed."

"...But-- but couldn't that-- rebuild, when-- she stopped--"

"Rebuild with what?" Rowlf reluctantly met his friend's eyes.

Kermit sighed and winced. His eyes once again settled on Miss Piggy, who was looking out the window, quite oblivious to the rest of the room. "...Do-- ...Do you-- ...Do you think-- she-- ...maybe-- ...maybe—lost--" ...But he couldn't get the words out, and he put his hand on his head and gave the dog a deeply worried look.

Rowlf looked at him for a long time. "...I think she needed her mind," he said softly.

"But--" Kermit's eyes darted back to her. So much of her had changed...

"Give her time," Rowlf said softly.

"But-- but she's been here for--"

"A matter of days."

"A week and a half!"

"Sure, if you include the days she slept." Rowlf shook his head. "Time, Kermit. Time, and rest, and nutrition. She's lucky she's even alive right now. Remember that."

Kermit winced, shivered, and sighed, his eyes settling on her. "...She..."

But the conversation was cut off there, for its very subject chose that moment to hurry to the front door and throw it open.

"Piggy?" Frog and dog glanced at each other, and Kermit hurried to the door.

She was slowly walking out onto the porch, reaching a loosely gloved hand out over the steps, palm up.

"Piggy?" Kermit stood in the doorway. "Piggy, what are you doing?"

"...HA HA!" She ran down the steps and out into the yard with her arms spread wide and her face turned up to the sky, and she spun around twice, grinning and giggling at the light but steady rainfall.

Kermit slowly walked out onto the porch, watching her, his urge to shield her from the wet and cold put very much on hold. She was... smiling, and… and laughing... and it had been... so-- ...so very long, since... he had seen... had heard...

She was getting wet out there as she laughed and spun and danced around, and her damp clothes were starting to cling to her skin, starting to show just how bony she was under the baggier-than-it-should-have-been dress.

Kermit was fairly certain that he spotted a camera flash from the bushes, and it stirred a sense of urgency in him. "PIGGY!" he called out to her. "SHOULDN'T YOU COME INSIDE?"

She laughed with delight, seemingly oblivious to him, his voice, and his urgency, not to mention the reason for it.

It started to rain harder, and Kermit decided he had no choice but to take the umbrella someone handed him and go out and get her.

"Piggy!" He ran out under the open umbrella. "Piggy--"

She laughed as she spun around, completely drenched by now, and perfectly thrilled about it.

He sighed and felt a smile grow on his lips. Her joy was just... contagious, so pure and uninhibited and rare... "Piggy?" he asked, weary but strangely content as he watched her. "What are you doing?"

"Rain!" She giggled and spun around and danced over to him. "It's raining, Kermie! Rain!"

He chuckled as she threw her drenched arms around him. "I noticed that." He tried to keep the umbrella over her, but she pushed it aside and grinned up at the clouds.

"Rain!" She pulled away from him to spin again. "Rain, Kermie!"

"I know, Piggy--" He grabbed her hand to pull her back. "But--"

She flung her arms around his shoulders and tucked her head beside his, shaking with a musical sort of laughter.

He sighed and wrapped his arms around her, having given up on the umbrella, and he soon found himself chuckling.

They laughed in the rain together for several long, wonderful moments, and before he tried to lead her inside again, he decided that she felt good in his arms-- far skinnier than she should have, but good, vibrant and alive in so many ways...

He finally closed the forgotten, unused umbrella and took her by the hand. "Piggy... let's go inside."

"But it's raining!" she said brightly, her hand easily slipping from his as she grinned up at the sky.

"Yes, it's raining," he chuckled, stepping closer to put his hands on her arms. "It's also wet and cold, Piggy."

He took her hand, and she let him lead her to the steps, but there she stopped. "But it's rain!"

He sighed and shook his head, still grinning. "Piggy..."

"I like rain," she said, happy and stubborn.

"I can tell," he smiled. "But, Piggy--"

"It's safe," she whispered sweetly, her head tilting back and her arms spreading wide as she felt the water running over her...

His breath caught at this last comment. He set the umbrella down on the porch and wrapped his arms around her. "It's safe at home, too," he whispered.

"Safe?" She wrapped her arms around him.

"Safe," he repeated assuringly.

She settled her face beside his neck. "I like safe," she whispered.

"Me too," he whispered, and he let himself lightly nuzzle against her soaking-wet hair, just for a moment. "Come inside, Piggy," he said softly, and at last, she did, without the slightest bit of protest, safely wrapped in his arm.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~​

While Miss Piggy was upstairs drying off, Kermit shooed most of the Muppets out of the kitchen and called his mother.

"Hello?"

"Hi Mom, it's Kermit!"

"Hello, son. How's Piggy?"

"Well, she-- She's doing really well today," Kermit said, settling his back against the wall. "Actually, uh-- ...depending, on... how she is tomorrow, maybe... maybe it'll be okay for Robin to come up here."

"...That so?"

Kermit nodded. "Mm-hm."

"...Well that's quite a turn-around, son. What happened?"

"...It rained," Kermit said softly.

"...Well, that DOES tend to happen... What's it got to do with Miss Piggy?"

"...Well, it-- ...It made her-- happy," he said. "She went outside, and she was spinning around, and—and— she laughed, Mom... and she was smiling..."

"...Well, that's something. Just because of the rain, you say?"

"I think so," Kermit said. "She-- she didn't wanna come inside, Mom. She--" He lowered his voice. "She said that... that rain is safe. And I told her that-- that home is safe, too. And she's been so much calmer since then..."

"...Rain is safe, hm?"

"That's what she said," Kermit said softly. "So-- I figure, if-- if she's still calm tomorrow, then-- she'll probably stay calm, and Robin can come up."

"...It seems reasonable, I suppose. How is she physically?"

Kermit sighed. "Well, she's strong enough to spin around in the rain," he said dryly.

His mother chuckled. "Well, I suppose that's something, but it's not quite what I was asking..."

"Well, why not?" Kermit smirked. "It's a major improvement from only waking up to eat..."

"Well, that's very true. Has she put on any weight, though?"

"...Well-- not that I can see," Kermit said softly. "But-- I talked to Rowlf about it earlier, and he said that-- ...that a lot of her body-- that we can’t see, probably needs to be... replenished, first..."

"Well, that dog has a good head on his shoulders. She eating any more today?"

"...Not... very noticeably more than yesterday..."

"Mm. Well, if she does have more to rebuild than we can see, maybe letting her stomach grow isn't her body's biggest priority."

"I suppose," Kermit said with a thoughtful nod.

"So you'll let us know tomorrow, if we should have someone bring Robin up?"

"Well-- or I could send someone down to get him," Kermit said. "I mean, I was supposed to bring him back, to begin with..."

"Well... We'll figure it out when the time comes."

Kermit nodded. "Okay. How's everyone there?"

"Oh, everyone's fine. Just the usual around here."

Kermit smiled. "Has Roseanna forgiven me yet?"

"She has not, nor does she appear to have any intention to."

Kermit chuckled. "Tell her she's not allowed to be that picky until she's got a star on her own dressing room door, outside of the swamp."

His mother chuckled. "Tell you what, son. You take care of your diva, and we'll take care of ours, and if either of us needs help, we'll call each other. Deal?"

"Fair enough, I suppose," Kermit sighed. "Good luck, Mom."

"You too, son. Talk to you soon."

"Yup. Bye for now!"

"Bye-bye!"

Click.

 

[theprawncracker]

Rain, Kermie! RAIN!

I... I definitely did not see that coming, but... RAIN! Rain is safe! HOME is safe! I... I LOVED this chapter! Magnificent! Stupdendous! Unbelievable! Just... FANTASTICABULOUS! RAIN! RAIN! RAAAAAAIN! I love it! I love Rowlf! I love Kermit! I love Mom! I love Rosanna! I LOVE MISS PIGGY! I LOVE THE RAIN!

I love it ALL! ! ! !

MORE PLEASE!

 

[Muppetfan44]

Aww, very nice! I love it that Piggy was finally smiling and happy for once. Every now and then it's always fun to go out and play in the rain, probably Piggy reverting to that child-like innocence in part, and remembering how the rain in the jungle made it somewhat safer for her.

I LOVED it when Kermit liked the feeling of Piggy in his arms. He definitely should have her in his arms more often. While I was reading, I was picturing them kissing in the rain, oooh that would be such a sweet, romantic moment between the two.

Did the muppets ever think about taking Piggy to a doctor, or giving her vitamins or something before she ate? With someone as frail as her and in her condition, I think it would be extrememly hard for the muppets to care for her on their own. Just a random thought.

Loving it as always. Please post more soon, I can't wait to see what happens when Robin and Miss Piggy unite!

 

[The Count]

Hmmm.... Me wonders if that camera flash Kermit sensed was what I think it was. Brace jourselves... Is coming... Thin-cut wet ham, the ew cover story from next week's SJW.

Lisa! Post more! Der habanero cumpells ju!

 

[TogetherAgain]

Did the muppets ever think about taking Piggy to a doctor, or giving her vitamins or something before she ate? With someone as frail as her and in her condition, I think it would be extrememly hard for the muppets to care for her on their own. Just a random thought.

Prawnie asked me something similar to that. Although he put it more along the lines of, "Why haven't they taken her to a hospital yet?" And my answer is... "Because they're Muppets." <Shrug> Best answer I've got, so I guess I'll stick with it.

 

[Muppetfan44]

my answer is... "Because they're Muppets." <Shrug> Best answer I've got, so I guess I'll stick with it.

That's as good an answer as any! I can live with that.

Please post more soon!

 

[TogetherAgain]

Chapter Eighteen

No, It's Not a Scam: She Really Is Back!
By Benny Krieg

It's the news story that refuses to die.

It started out pretty small, sweet and innocent, with no hint of its sinister intentions to haunt the public for the rest of eternity. That was a year and a half ago, when the Muppets signed on to do a non-Muppet movie, side by side with one of the most stellar casts in the history of Hollywood. At the time, about one sentence of any given article on the deal mentioned the minor little detail that the movie would be set in the Amazon.

Then the months went by, and the producers had the idea that everyone involved with the movie, cast and crew alike, should visit the real live Amazon, so they would know what to aim for with the film. Visiting the online bookstore didn't count, apparently. So cast and crew members were divided into groups, and in their groups, they visited the Amazon. The Muppets were the last to go.

But the story didn't end there! Instead, it took on an all-new life. This time one year ago, no one could even turn around without hearing about it. When the Muppets were in the Amazon, Miss Piggy disappeared without a trace.

Just when the frenzy of that traumatizing fact was fading away in the public conscious, they found her gloves and half-eaten boots. Anyone who still had hope, by that point, lost hope, unless their name was Kermit the Frog. (He's not very good at giving up, which has something to do with why he's a huge star, and you have to respect that.)

As far as anyone knew, Miss Piggy had died a horribly tragic death. All of Hollywood mourned. The entire nation mourned. In fact, just about every citizen of every Western civilization mourned.

And if you didn't hear about it then, you heard about it when filming of the movie began. And if you didn't hear about it then, you heard about it when filming wrapped. And if you still hadn't heard about it, you heard about it when the movie premiered. And if you still hadn't heard about it, it came up again when a few Muppets presented the award for Best Actor at the Academy Awards. And just in case you'd still somehow missed it, it was everywhere again when the movie became one of the biggest blockbusters that Hollywood has seen in years.

And let's face it; we all knew that we would hear about it again when the movie came out on DVD, as it's scheduled to do sometime this fall.

So it goes without saying that everyone is all too aware that Miss Piggy gave her life in the Amazon last year for the sake of movie research.

It's no wonder, then, that we were skeptical last week when the Muppets announced that Miss Piggy, very much alive, had returned to the Muppet Boarding House exactly one year-- almost to the hour-- after her disappearance, and that she was alive, and needed some time with the Muppets before she made any public appearance.

Like every other reporter of any kind in the State of California, I was curious and intrigued, and I made it my business to sit on their lawn, camera in hand, until I had proof that the diva had, in fact, returned. And, as the week went by, like everyone else, I was getting frustrated. The other guys and girls went home, but something was bugging me about this whole thing.

See, in case you haven't noticed, the Muppets are a pretty honest bunch. They come with their exceptions, of course, but when you get down to it, Kermit's in charge, and Kermit just isn't the lying type, especially about this kind of thing. As far as I can tell, there is absolutely no reason in the world for them to have made that press release unless every last letter of it was true.

But I've only got so much patience. I'd been hanging out in a bush for the better part of a week. There wasn't even anyone to talk to anymore, because everyone else had given up. I was tired, I was cold, and just to top it all off, it was starting to rain. So I started to pack up.

And then the front door opened. Believe me, when you've been staring at a door all week, and it finally opens, you pay attention to who walks out. I couldn't believe my eyes, though, because there was Miss Piggy herself.

She had a look of absolute awe on her face. At first, I thought she was just amazed to see her front lawn again without any people on it. (Like I said, I was in a bush.) Then I felt a raindrop. Now, if you combine my excitement for seeing her, my annoyance at the rain, my worry for the water getting into one of my cameras, and how grateful I was for plastic covers for those cameras, you might get to about the same amount of emotion of her absolute joy. I witnessed a very rare sight that day, you see. Not only did I see the long-thought-dead Miss Piggy alive and well, but-- much to my absolute astonishment-- I saw her inner child.

She ran out into that rain, and she laughed and spun and danced around with enough pure delight to rival any given kindergartener. I actually envied her for it. I was also rather annoyed at her for it, because the rain, combined with her spinning, made it next to impossible to get a picture to prove it! The shots I did get don't do the sight justice, but they'll have to do.

Now, as she stayed out in the rain, two things happened.

First of all, she got wet. She got very, very wet. It sounds obvious, I know, but it's worth saying, because when her clothes got wet, and stuck to her skin, I understood why the Muppets are trying to shelter her from us evil reporters. She survived the Amazon, amazingly, miraculously... barely. The poor thing is skin and bones, in the most extreme sense of the words. She is a skin-wrapped skeleton, and she has a lot of recovering to do. I do not, in any way, shape, or form, doubt or question that she really, truly needs to rest and rebuild her every asset.

And I do not believe that she could possibly be in a better place to do just that. The Muppets are known for giving each other a hard time, to say the least, but at the heart of things, they collectively make one of the most protective families in the country, which leads me to the second thing that happened as she stayed out in the rain.

The second thing that happened is that I pitied Kermit more than I ever have before. Ever. And then I envied him.

Kermit, you see, with the other Muppets, is undoubtedly doing absolutely everything in his power to take care of Miss Piggy, for obvious reasons. So, naturally, when she was out spinning and dancing in the rain, he was worried sick about her, and trying to get her to come inside.

For those of you far-too-sheltered individuals who don't even know who Miss Piggy is... She's stubborn.

Which means that Kermit's attempts to get her to come inside led instead to him coming outside with an umbrella that he never did convince her to use. The poor guy had to be frustrated.

But he didn't stay frustrated for long, and that's when I started to envy him. Miss Piggy was laughing, you see, and laughter has this habit of being contagious.

And that is how we come to this picture on the right. Kermit and Miss Piggy, standing in the rain, hugging, laughing with the purest sort of causeless joy. See why I envy them?

So rest assured, world. Miss Piggy is very much alive, and she's in the best hands her fans could ask for. The only question now, of course, is what to do with all of the "In memory of Miss Piggy" dedications and shrines and memorials and national holidays...

 

[theprawncracker]

NATIONAL HOLIDAYS! ! ! ! ! ! HAHAHAHAHAHA! ! !

Oh my goodness! That chapter was NOTHING yet... it was SO much! I am SO impressed! Almost beyond words! (Thank goodness I'm typing. ) That chapter had the SAME tone as an article I read in "Rolling Stone" today about Robert Downey Jr.--the tone of a reporter. BEAUTIFUL! I can't tell you how impressed I am by this! It's just... fantasticabulous! I love, love, LOVE it! More please!