1. Welcome to the Muppet Central Forum!
    You are viewing our forum as a guest. Join our free community to post topics and start private conversations. Please contact us if you need help with registration or your account login.

  2. "Muppet Guys Talking" Debuts On-line
    Watch the inspiring documentary "Muppet Guys Talking", read fan reactions and let us know your thoughts on the Muppet release of the year.

  3. Sesame Street Season 48
    Sesame Street's 48th season officially began Saturday November 18 on HBO. After you see the new episodes, post here and let us know your thoughts.

One Shots, Parodies, & Trailers!

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by WebMistressGina, Aug 28, 2012.

  1. The Count

    The Count Moderator Staff Member

    Yes, Courtney from TDI, but it's been expanded into other titles for subsequent seasons, so the fanfiction category just lists it as "Total Drama".

    Okay, I went and looked it for you.
    Bogen County 1st Runner-Up: Debbie Sue Anderson.
    It's possible there's a 2nd Runner-Up named Alma Jane Gitnick, though I'm not sure where I got that info from, maybe from watching the movie or imdb.
    You could keep Lorelei though. *Shrugs. *Would like to have names for the new chorines from The Muppets telethon opening: the Ernie-girl blonde in the green dress, Angelina Joli-lipped brunnette, and the two lavender girls; one redhead in a blue dress, the other a brunnette in a diamond-cutout pink dress. And I have those descripts from Newsie who sent me the arch layout.

    My vote's for the saw-juggling banning imposed on the bear. Or you could finish WBM, then Motocross, then expand this Bogen County oneshot into your Mupventures series.
  2. WebMistressGina

    WebMistressGina Well-Known Member

    And this is why you get a cookie *hands over cookie*

    Debbie Sue does sound familiar and if I remember correctly, she was the brunette, which means that Alma Jane has to have been the blonde.

    Well, I think I know what movie I'll be watching this weekend.

    You mean the chicks from the new movie chorusline?? I don't remember them. Huh, well, I think we know which movies we're watching this weekend.

    I definitely have my work cut out for me. First things - I have GOT to finish this stupid assignment. Then when I am home, I will hopefully not be distracted by new roommates moving in; then I will work on WBM, which I will then finish and post on Monday. I will then finish working on Motocross and will post...I dunno. Sunday maybe, after I do some school work.

    I also have to enter in some finance stuff for work (Monday), at which I will then start up the sword juggling thing (short) and probably finish this one shot that is not really a one shot. Or maybe it is, I dunno.

    And at some point, I'll sleep.
  3. The Count

    The Count Moderator Staff Member

    Wha? You say something?
    :insatiable: Coooookie! *Omnomnomnom.

    Yes, the new chicks from the new Muppet movie. Cause we already have the chicks from the Muppet show in KG, :sigh: I wants new chapter to that too.

    You've got your marching orders then. *Leaves fanfic offices, headed back to my HV home.
  4. Muppetfan44

    Muppetfan44 Active Member

    This new one is great- I hope you continue it on for at least a few more chapters!
  5. WebMistressGina

    WebMistressGina Well-Known Member

    So after a horrific morning of a screeching bike, I get to work, get all set up and discover....we have no internet!

    Well, you know what that means. It means I write stuff for you guys! Here is that scene I had where Fozzie tries to incorporate sword juggling in his act.

    Hint - it doesn't go well.


    Title: Untitled Scene
    Rating: G
    Idea: Not really sure. IIRC, it was either before I was writing Schotsky's or during.

    “And now, here to tickle your funny bone, that funny man himself, FOZZIE BEAR!!”

    The new format of the show seemed to be going well, at least that’s what Kermit the Frog thought. From humble beginnings to the big time, the frog from the swamps of Mississippi had hoped he’d be doing what he wanted and now he was.

    The Muppet Show had been a spur of the moment idea, though one that had been building for some time. Kermit had spent years in the entertainment industry, getting his big break when he ended up meeting the show’s pianist Rowlf, who had been the sidekick to one Jimmy Dean. It was that meeting that had led to his meeting with one Jim Henson, the man whom he credited with bringing this whole thing together.

    Jim had believed in him, believed in all of them, and when Kermit – along with four others – and come to Henson about the possibility of doing their own show, the bearded man had been all for it and all aboard.

    Fast forward years later and Kermit found himself director, producer, and unofficial leader of their motely group, which had all started with five unconventional and unruly members. One of those members, Fozzie Bear, was currently on stage, supposedly doing his weekly monologue.

    “Chief, did you okay Fozzie’s sword act?”

    Young Scooter Grosse, the nephew to the JP Grosse, had been put in place by his uncle to literally keep an eye on things. The initial hope was that the teenager would report to his uncle the weird goings on that usually happened at the theater that the elder Grosse owned and was renting to the group known as the Muppets. While that may have been the case for the first few months, Scooter had happily and devotedly switched sides and was doing his best to help Kermit contain the madness that went on.

    Lately, Kermit found himself leaning on the boy a lot more in terms of responsibility. Certainly, running a theater that was the backdrop to a television show, while also doing the financing, act booking, guest star booking, plus still making his regular appearances on Sesame Street, could be deemed a bit much for one frog and Kermit had gotten to the point where he was seriously considering hiring an assistant. He had been meaning to make a mention of it to Scooter, to help him put out the word that an assistant – both personal and business – would be hired, but the frog was starting to wonder if maybe he should start looking in instead of out.

    Case in point, Scooter’s promptness always surprised Kermit, especially in terms of knowing when something wasn’t right. Fozzie and swords didn’t sound right in any sense of the word and Kermit nearly did a double take when the go-fer informed him of it.

    “What sword act?” he asked. To his knowledge, he could not remember having a conversation with the bear comic that included the words ‘sword act’ or anything that resembled an act that would require swords. In fact, he was fairly sure that he had banned any type of act that included sharp instruments.

    “Hey Kermit,” Gonzo the Great, the show’s performance artist – and probably the only person that could possibly be allowed anything of a sword act – called. “You’d better come take a look at this.”
    The passageway from backstage to that of the stage itself was supposed to be clear, in order for acts to come on and go off stage as quickly as possible; that of course meant nothing to this troupe. It wasn’t uncommon for acts that were going up next or even those who weren’t even in the show that night to just loiter by the stage way in order to view the current act on stage.

    Currently Gonzo, along with the resident leading lady Miss Piggy, were the ones loitering and it didn’t look as though they were actually worried and concerned for what was happening on stage at the moment. Normally, Fozzie’s act was more miss than hit most nights; it certainly didn’t help that the old men who sat in the balcony above stage left gave the bear grief every time he walked on stage, which of course did nothing to bolster Fozzie’s confidence.

    The audience was never any help either. The bear and others had literally been booed off their own stage more than once.

    However, on this night, the looks of concern wasn’t because the act was failing, it was because the act was dangerous. Coming over to stand in between the two, Kermit’s mouth literally dropped when he was able to see what the bear was doing onstage.

    Fozzie Bear was in no way shape, form, or personality for daredevil like stunts. Those were usually left in the semi-capable hands of Gonzo the Great; Fozzie usually also did not go about changing his act without telling either Kermit or Scooter he was going to do so. So to see what the bear’s actual routine was…

    Fozzie had somehow, earlier in the week, gotten it into his head that his stand up comedy act was passé; no one just did jokes anymore, they did other things, whether it be magic or using a puppet or dummy to enhance their appeal, they did more than just jokes. Fozzie, who was always set to do more for his act and give more to the audience, had decided that what his act needed was excitement.

    Taking a page from the great book of his friend Gonzo, the bear realized that what was missing from his act was something dangerous; certainly they were aware that the audiences always enjoyed when they hurt themselves – they really needed a better clientele of audience members – so what better way of spicing up his act than doing something dangerous. That of course was a problem in itself as Fozzie didn’t really do anything dangerous, he also didn’t like doing anything dangerous; but for his act, his show, and his audience, he would.

    Where he had gotten the idea, he didn’t know though he was sure he had seen it on a commercial during a late night movie marathon. He was going to juggle knives. Ginzu knives, the very thing his act was missing. Unfortunately, he didn’t own any Ginzu knives and then he saw it – scimitars. Like a knife and sword combined to make…a really curvy sword. It was genius! It was golden!

    It was perfect.

    And before he could even say ‘scimitar’, the bear had ordered it and had it shipped.

    Now, this brilliant plan would have worked except for a few things – firstly, Fozzie didn’t know how to juggle. Secondly, he didn’t know how to juggle anything bigger than say a golf ball. Thirdly, he certainly didn’t know how to juggle knives or rather, swords in this case. Fourth, he had failed to mention to either Scooter or Kermit that he had changed his act and would be juggling five very sharp and very dangerous scimitars.

    So now, Fozzie stood on stage doing his best to either catch said swords as they came flying down from where he had thrown them up in the air or avoiding them as they came flying down at him, while simultaneously trying to tell his original act, which was the one that Kermit knew about.

    “Did you okay this?” Gonzo asked, turning a stunned look on his friend and employer. Truthfully, Gonzo was a little put out that he hadn’t thought of the idea of juggling swords; he had always thought the idea beneath him. Anyone could juggle swords! Except Fozzie, apparently, but the ability to juggle five incredibly sharp and dangerous weapons while telling jokes was new.

    And of course Gonzo was concerned that, quite frankly, the bear was going to kill himself.

    “No, I most certainly did not!” Kermit hissed, trying to reign in the amount of worry and anger that was coursing through him. “Scooter, who told Fozzie he could juggle swords?”

    “Wasn’t me,” the go-fer replied. He had of course followed the frog as soon as Gonzo called him and was now witness to what was probably going to be the first Muppet death on stage. “I didn’t even know he could juggle.”

    “He can’t,” replied both Kermit and Gonzo.

    “Idiot,” muttered Piggy, who was seeming casually leaning against the doorjamb with her arms crossed. Even after this time, Piggy still seemed like an enigma to many of the Muppets; her very stance and stature cried ‘diva’ and she acted the part to the letter. This meant that, unless your name was Kermit, she treated you like a piece of gum she had accidently stepped in while crossing the street; however, for those that had gotten close enough to know the former Miss Bogen County winner, Piggy wasn’t as high maintenance or snotty as she seemed. Case in point, she may have been highly annoyed that the bear was going to ruin the next set, which just happened to be hers, and may have seemed to the world that she could easily work around a dead bear on stage, but that wasn’t the case inside.

    Inside, Piggy was just as concerned and worried as the others were. And while she would probably never let it be known, she liked Fozzie and she certainly didn’t want to see him chop himself up into little bits. Oh, she was going to have words with the bear, should he survive this.


    “Right!” There was a reason that the sixteen year old was turning out to be a very helpful asset; without Kermit even telling him, Scooter had gone ahead and made up a tin pan full of whip cream. It was a ‘in case of comedic emergency, throw’ plan that Fozzie and Kermit had come up with in the case that, when one of the bear’s acts were failing, someone would come out with that to not only put a stop to the act by literally ‘finishing the bear off’ but letting it be a more humane way than just pulling him off stage with the giant hook.

    With pie pan in hand, Scooter handed it off to his boss, just at the moment one of the scimitars came down and nicked the bear on the arm. Kermit of course was a bit smarter, as he let the swords fall to the ground before heading out on stage. And Fozzie knew he was in trouble – Kermit had this look on his face that clearly said he wasn’t happy and holding a pie in his hand wasn’t helping the image.


    “Kermit,” the bear whimpered.

    “It’s time to say good night.”

    “Is the show over already?” cried one of the elderly gentlemen in the balcony.

    “We’re still awake!” called the other.

    Fozzie gulped, but stood straight and proud. He was well aware that this was probably not the best idea he’d ever had and he was probably going to get a stern talking to once he got off stage, but he had to note that Kermit at least had the foresight to get the pie and not the hook.

    His frog, the best frog friend a bear could have.

    “Do it and get it over with,” the bear replied.

    “We’ve been telling you that for years!” called the old man.

    “Keep that up and this pie’s gonna be aimed at you!” Kermit retorted, seriously not in the mood for the nightly banter that occurred with these two.

    The audience of course loved it, having no idea the seriousness that was going on in front of them or what would happen once the bear got backstage. For their parts, Kermit and Fozzie did play it off as though the bear didn’t want the pie to the face – which of course he didn’t – and right as he tried to sprint around the frog, he got hit with both barrels, causing him to stumbled back thankfully into the waiting arms of the people he thought would be a little more gentle with him.

    They weren’t.

    Gonzo and Piggy were of course the ones to actively grab the bear and literally drag him offstage. A towel was thrusted in his hands and he was told to sit before being pushed back into what he hoped was a nice, normal chair and not the hot seat he had expected from Kermit. Unfortunately, while Fozzie had been well aware that Kermit was angry with him, he hadn’t even begun to imagine that his other friends would be just as livid.

    On stage, Kermit did what he did usually best – cover for the others while some crisis was taking place backstage.

    “We’re gonna get this all cleaned up,” he began. “Don’t worry folks, Fozzie’s fine.”

    Fozzie loud cry of “ow!” was easily heard from backstage, causing the frog to turn towards the noise.

    “I’m sure that was nothing,” he covered. “And now, here’s a great tune by our very own orchestra!” Kermit looked down at the conductor, Nigel, who stood in the orchestra pit. Luckily, because Nigel usually faced away from the audience, they couldn’t see his look of confusion or his expression that cried, “What?”

    Also luckily, the Muppet Orchestra, which also consisted of members from the band The Electric Mayhem, had experienced enough Muppet Show shenanigans to have several songs at the ready. A song suggestion by bassist Floyd Pepper was all that was needed to start in on a little upbeat rock number that would hopefully provide the stage crew enough time to clean up Fozzie’s act and set up the next one.

    And if all went well, it gave Kermit enough time to kill Fozzie Bear.

    Returning backstage, Kermit noted the small cluster of Muppets off to one side. Fozzie sat in the middle, his uninjured arm being used to rub the back of his head from where Piggy slapped it; Gonzo was crouched on the other side with Scooter and a first aid trying to patch the bear up.

    “Kermit!” the bear whined. “Piggy hit me!”

    “Oh good,” he replied, sarcastically as he came up to the group. Turning to the diva, he continued with “Hit him again.”

    “Not cool, Frog.”

    “No Fozzie,” Kermit spat. “You know what’s not cool? Tomorrow’s headline – ‘Muppets Fozzie Bear kills himself on stage with juggling act’.”

    “’Scuse me, Mr. Kermit,” one of the stagehands said, interrupting their conversation. Holding up the five scimitars that had been laying on stage, he asked, “What do I do with these?”

    “I’ll take them,” Gonzo volunteered, only to receive a look from Kermit.

    “No you won’t,” he said. To the stagehand, he said, “Go put them in the stock room. And lock it!”

    “Oh come on, Kermit!” Gonzo protested, watching the stagehand – and those swords – go off without him. “I can at least juggle!” Here, he gave the bear such a fierce look, Fozzie actually squirmed in his chair. “If anyone is sane enough to juggle scimitars, it’s me!”

    “I’m sorry,” Piggy asked. “What did you just say?”

    “I said, if anyone is sane enough to juggle scimitars, it would be me.”

    “That’s what I thought you said,” the diva nodded. “Allow me to offer a rebuttal. First, no one in this building is sane and secondly, no sane person would give you sharp instruments to play with.”

    The performing artist was just about to retort to that, when that night’s guest star – the lovely Eartha Kitt – came from her dressing room. “Excuse me,” she purred. “But I seem to have a cow in my dressing room.”

    “Maybe he was hoping for a steak in,” Fozzie chuckled. “Get it?” The group around him glared at him and his joke.

    “A cow,” Kermit muttered. “Of course. Where else would a cow be?” The frog stalked off for the stairs, all the while grumbling about suicidal bears and even more suicidal whatever it was Gonzo was.

    And can I just say....why was Eartha Kit never a guest on the Muppet Show? Or in any movie? Because...she was fantastic in the Emperor's New Grove and really, that's be honest - she's everyone's favorite Catwoman. She is.

    Okay, so....I'm debating if I should include those scenes from other stuff or just make them actual series in themselves. What do you guys think?
  6. The Count

    The Count Moderator Staff Member

    Naw, just keep these oneshots as they are, a collection of scenes. And if one gets enough feedback like the one where Piggy is asked to give up her Miss Bogen County title, bring them into your existing series like the Miss Piggy Muppet Adventures.

    Thanks for this story, that explains soooo much about why neither Fozzie nor Gonzo are allowed to have sharpened swords.
    :concern: Oh, but it's okay for the monsters to have them?
    They know what they're doing with the weapons. You just want to show off how badly close you can get to killing yourself without killing yourself.
    :concern:, under his breath, Spoilsport.
  7. miss kermie

    miss kermie Well-Known Member

    I just read the bogen county thing...
  8. newsmanfan

    newsmanfan Well-Known Member

    I like the "in case of comedic emergency" whippy-cream pie standing by. And Gonzo whining about not being the one juggling scimitars. And I could actually see Piggy giving Fozzie a worried/relieved, Gibbs-style slap on the back of the head when the danger was past. All very cute! :)

  9. WebMistressGina

    WebMistressGina Well-Known Member

    In looking back, I completely forgot to that state the cream pie thing is from Slackbot. That was not my idea; everything else was, but that was from her. I think. Pretty sure.
  10. WebMistressGina

    WebMistressGina Well-Known Member

    Okay folks, here is the first section of something from what I call "Scenes from Schotsky's". So I had all of these ideas for Meeting with Schotsky's and not all of them got in. This is one of the very first that I came up with, but ultimately didn't put in.

    It's just the first section out of...I think three probably.

    Title: Scenes from Schotsky's - The Wow Factor
    Rating: PG
    Part: 1/3
    Idea: Taken from the story, "Meeting at Schotsky's" by me (WebMistressGina)

    Filming a television show that was ultimately set in an old timey vaudeville theater was certainly something to get used to. It had taken months, bordering on a year, to get all the sets, all the equipment, and all of the acts in order to bring this show to fruition.

    The cold calling that the group had to do was ridiculous, as in the amount of time it had taken them to actually find someone worthy to agree to be on their very first show; that of course was the big thing. No one knew who they were, even with the backing of Jim Henson and some help from Jimmy Dean; added to that was the fact that their United States market was a bit fickle when it came to airing a show about a bunch of Muppets performing in a theater.

    But…it was worth it. Well worth it, because that week they were in rehearsals; they had gotten their acts together – barely – and had even gotten renown dancer Juliet Prowse to be their very first guest star. Things seemed to be going well.

    On the surface.

    Under it all, this group of barely unknowns were feeling the pressure and it was starting to show. Kermit the Frog, who had somehow become the unofficial director and leader of the group, had been at the forefront from the very beginning. It had been Kermit’s idea to do a show in the first place, finding it difficult to see any type of show that was aimed for both kids and adults and in which they could all watch and enjoy together.

    This show, this Muppet Show, literally seemed to be all he lived and breathed for the last few months, years really, upon the first inklings of the idea, with it all leading up to this very week – the week in which they went live. He had a lot riding on this; certainly, he could always go back to his spot on Sesame Street, but Kermit wanted more than just that. And with the others counting on him so, he didn’t want to let anyone down.

    So if he, for instance, got a little short with comic Fozzie Bear or got extremely irritated by Miss Piggy, they all understood that he was under the gun.

    The aforementioned Miss Piggy was certainly being understanding. Since meeting Kermit, she had seen all that he did and tried to do in both his career and that of jumpstarting everyone else’s; the frog was completely selfless, not to mention determined and humble and just a whole mess of things that made him that more attractive to her.

    He had even given her several key spots in the show, not just little chorus girl bits, but actually starring roles alongside him and even the guest star. She personally had never heard of this Juliet person, but she was finding it immensely difficult to bit her tongue whenever she saw her and Kermit together. She was of course a proper lady and proper ladies did not go around punching women who just happened to talk to a handsome frog.

    No sir, they did not.

    Piggy was in Hollywood and that type of behavior – something that had gotten her into trouble in the past – could not be done here. So, she held in her annoyance and had convinced herself that Kermit was just being friendly; after all, this…dancer was their guest and she should be treated with kindness and respect. She had connections and they would need all they could get if they wanted to keep this thing afloat.

    And she certainly wasn’t upset or annoyed that the theater owner’s dog had its own dressing room nor that Kermit seemed to be giving into the theater owner’s nephew a little too easily. The kid seemed nice, if not a bit irritating in trying to get that dog – and himself – a little extra piece of a pie he hadn’t even been around to prepare and/or bake.

    So busy in her own musings, Piggy hadn’t even noticed she had been heading towards their dilapidated cantina until a voice literally stopped her. “You know he doesn’t really notice you, right?”

    Turning, she had already identified the voice before she saw the irritating creature it belonged to. The Great Gonzo, as he was known, stood leaning against the wall, giving her a smile in greeting. Of all the people she had met on this journey to stardom, Gonzo was the one person she understood the least; from day one of their meeting, the blue whatever had been hitting on like no tomorrow, despite her repeated threats of bodily harm.

    That only egged him on and she was convinced that anything she did to him, he would probably enjoy.

    Narrowing her eyes, she asked, “And just whom are you referring?”



    “Really,” the blue weirdo replied. “And I’m not just saying that to be petty or jealous. Well…not completely. I’m just saying that he doesn’t even take an interest in you.”

    That was the other thing – Gonzo was constantly questioning whether or not Kermit had taken a vested interest in her. She wasn’t blind nor stupid; she was very aware that the two seemed to be vying for her attention, however and truthfully, even she couldn’t tell which one of them even meant it.

    “I assure you, Buzzard Beak,” she growled, advancing on him slightly. “I can make anyone take an interest in me.”

    “Of that I have no doubt,” Gonzo breathed, tensing in the case that she actually hit him.

    He knew he treaded on very thin water with her and while this chase could always be fun, there was also an extra added amount of danger attached to it. He hadn’t been lying when he told her once that he found beautiful and dangerous women to be exciting and the pig had both going for her in spades.

    “However,” he continued, assured that he was at least safe, for the moment. “I think we both know that Kermit isn’t just anyone. But I’m sure I could help you out on that.”

    “As if I’m going to be taking advice from you, you blue furred weirdo.”

    “Down, Cruella,” he retorted. Gonzo was a fairly laid back kinda guy, but he could take enough insults to really be offended. He hadn’t known the others very long – at least not as long as say Kermit and Rowlf had known each other – so he wasn’t sure if he was just trying to be friendly with someone who would never truly be a friend to him or what.

    “I’m just trying to help.”

    “Why?” Piggy asked, crossing her arms. “What exactly do you get out of this?”

    “Maybe I think if I help you, you’ll be a little nicer to me.”

    “That’s slim to none.”

    “You should know by now, Piggy,” Gonzo smirked. “One of my greatest strengths is being persistent.”

    “-ly annoying,” she finished. “Yes, I’ve noticed.” Turning back around to head towards her original destination, the diva in training again stopped. “Not I care,” she huffed, turning her head slightly to glance at him. “But what exactly would I need to do?”

    She couldn’t believe she was even asking and by the look on Gonzo’s face, he was equally surprised. Piggy prided herself on a being very self-sufficient and she certainly didn’t need any help in a getting someone’s attention, but Kermit the Frog – as the stuntman had pointed out – wasn’t just a someone.

    “With Kermit?” he asked. Shrugging, he said, “Just a little something I call the wow factor.”

    “The wow factor.”

    “Sure,” the weirdo replied, pushing himself off the wall and walking around her. “I do it all the time. The trick is to wow the crowd, or frog in this case, in a way they least expect. So far, you’ve been very sugar and spice and everything nice, but I think we both know there’s a tiger under that pretty face and those –“ Here, Gonzo’s eyes couldn’t help but train themselves on the ample chest that was attached to the pig as a whole.

    “Clothes,” he said instead, forcing his eyes to connect with the baby blues that always seemed to be narrowed in his direction. “My question is, why don’t you make your stand and show him you’re interested?”

    Huffing, Piggy said, “Like I haven’t been doing that already.”

    “Yeah,” Gonzo agreed, somewhat. “In the subtlest way possible and really, Piggy, sweetie, we both know you are well south of being subtle.”

    Piggy looked away, but Gonzo could tell she was at least giving some thought to this. He wasn’t even sure why he was trying to help her or rather, trying to help Kermit get her; he really was attracted to her, even if it meant that most times he was one pick up line away from being decked, but ultimately he couldn’t be in a competition against Kermit for the pig’s affections if the frog wasn’t doing anything to show he was remotely interested.

    And Gonzo was convinced he was interested.

    “Look,” he whispered. “If you go for the wow factor and Kermit still isn’t noticing you, then one, he’s blind or stupid or both and two, I won’t bother you ever again.”

    “Ah ha,” she said, pointing at him. “And what happens if he does notice me? Not that he hasn’t already.”

    “Then I’ll tone it down a bit,” he replied, with a smile. Reaching into his pocket, Gonzo pulled out all the money he had for the week; all of fifty dollars. Holding it up for her to see, he said, “Fifty bucks says you won’t do it anyway.”

    While she wouldn’t admit, Gonzo’s crazy idea seemed to have some merit and an added bonus of fifty bucks wasn’t bad either. Starting a television show was a financial drain and would continue to be so if this show didn’t take off.

    “Fifty bucks?” she asked, which he nodded. “Again, I ask, what do I need to do? That is, if I was even considering this moronic plan of yours.”

    “I don’t really care what you do,” he stated, placing the money back in his pocket. “Serenade him with a mariachi band, hire a skywriter to write your names in the sky, jump him behind, doesn’t matter. However, to earn yourself fifty bucks, I do have to be around to see it, of course.”

    “Of course.”

    “Now if you’ll excuse,” he said, nodding a farewell. “I have to go measure a tire.”

    Piggy watched him go, shaking her head slightly. The idiot actually thought he could eat a tire and for some reason – or desperation – Kermit had green lit the act. Thoughts of Kermit caused Piggy to wonder about Gonzo’s proposal; normally, she didn’t need any help in catching the eye of a suitor, but Kermit was proving to be a bit harder than most.

    Oh, there were times when she thought he found her attractive and there was a mutual interest for both and then there were other times as though he just couldn’t be bothered with her. The former beauty queen had to admit this back and forth was a bit confusing; either Kermit was interested in her or not.

    When she had met him, the thought of a show that he could be in control of and broadcast what he wanted had been there before her, before Gonzo, and even before Fozzie; she was sure that once the show got off the ground – and it would, of that she had no doubt – he would turn his full attention on her.

    She was…she was fairly sure of that.

    But…it wouldn’t hurt to give Gonzo’s idea a try.
    newsmanfan and miss kermie like this.
  11. miss kermie

    miss kermie Well-Known Member

    Oh wow...
    Piggy's between a rock and a hard place, huh?
    Listen to the wierdo, or wait for the frog...
  12. WebMistressGina

    WebMistressGina Well-Known Member

    It's time, once again, for me to update this. Yes, I know I technically have a pending story here that hasn't been finished, but that's why I made this thread. Because ideas sometimes don't get the message that I'm busy and have work to do.

    This gem of awesomeness is actually based on an episode of SeaLab 2021, which was an original cartoon in the 1960s before CN's Adult Swim got a hold of it and made it better. I seem to be the only one of my friends that finds this show hilarious. Sadly, no longer showing on AS, but I believe you can get the DVDs (only missing season 4 now!) from their website. Anyway, here's -

    Title: Trapped in a Closet (and yes, this is a snark on the R. Kelly ridiculousness, I mean song)
    Idea From: SeaLab 2021 season 1 ep "In The Closet"
    Rating: PG

    “There’s something I have to tell you. I can deny it no longer. I’m in love with you, Pepita.”

    “Oh! Ju are so sweet and handsomes, but there is something I must tell ju, h’okay? I am not Pepita, the womans of ju dreams, h’okay? I am…her twin sister!”


    “Si! I have loves ju from a far, h’okay? And my love, my Guatemaleness quivers for ju and only ju!”

    “What the heck are you three doing in here?”

    A normal at Muppet Theatre was never a normal day. It was something you just got used to when working with the group and while they themselves were quite used to the strange and odd happening, what Scooter Grosse, stage manager and production assistant, walked in on really did top the list of things no one should ever walk in to.

    The young assistant and manager had been working non-stop, first doing his normal duties for the show, but also turning his hand to that of screen writing. He had taken a few classes when he had been in college, but he had never had the time – nor the will – to actually put any of his ideas on paper. He and Kermit, the undisputed leader of the Muppets, had been discussing ideas for another movie and Scooter had gotten it into his head that he would very much like to supply the script for it.

    But as what happened when he did too many things at once, Scooter found himself losing sleep, which meant he often lost focus. A quick nap he figured would do the trick and he needed to do was find a place that was close enough to the theater that would allow him to get the rest he needed.

    And that’s how he found the three, as he stood in the doorway of a prop and supply closet; Gonzo the Great, Rizzo the Rat, and Pepe the King Prawn were all gathered together doing, what looked like, some sort of…theater. Scooter didn’t know and he actually didn’t want to find out.

    “Scooter!” Gonzo exclaimed, jumping up from the chair he had been sitting. “Thank heavens you’re here! That door is broken; we’ve been trapped in here for three days!”

    “The door’s not broken,” the page said, stepping fully into the room. He immediately closed the door, much to the protests of the three who were already inside. “It’s just tricky.” The red head then tried to open the door, several times, and failed.

    “This door’s broken,” he announced after a time.

    “Yes, I can see that,” the weirdo deadpanned. “Now you – probably being the only person could have gotten us out – are now stuck in here with me and the idiot twins.”

    “Hey!” the rat protested. “That’s not very nice!”

    “Reezo is right, h’okay?” Pepe added. “’specially after we put on all these shows for you.”

    “Is that why he’s wearing a dress?” Scooter whispered to the weirdo.

    “Don’t ask.”

    “And ju know,” the shrimp continued. “Ju weren’t complaining for the first two days, h’okay? Dos dias, h’okay? Dos dias we performs for ju and this what we get, huh?”

    “Okay, first of all,” Gonzo countered. “Those first two days were spent with me trying to calm you both down, hence my idea for something to take your minds off our situation. Secondly, the performances were good, however when you start bringing in contrived and overused plot lines, that’s when you’ve lost your originality. Like I couldn’t see that Rick was going to be fooled by Pepita’s twin sister. C’mon! Have some pride in your characters!”

    Scooter looked at the three before turning and trying the door one more time.

    “Don’t blame me!” Rizzo cried, indignantly. “I thought I was doing a pretty good job!”

    “I didn’t believe ju really care for me,” Pepe retorted. “I didn’t feel as though there was love in jur eyes.”

    “Yeah, well,” the rat countered. “Maybe that’s because you’re coming off a bit…oh how can I say this nicely…trashy.”

    “Trashy!?” Pepe exclaimed. “Ju are calling me trashy, ju ju ju…hick!”

    “Hick!?” Rizzo screamed. “I’ll have you know my character grew up in a loving, close knit community in farm country!”

    “This is actually the highlight of the three days,” Gonzo murmured. “This is a daily occurrence. I only wish I had popcorn.”

    Soon enough, Pepe and Rizzo were at it, swinging and in most cases, missing each other as their argument got heated and then physical. And, like clockwork, both swung at the exact same time and managed to clock each other, knocking both out.

    “This is usually when I take a nap,” Gonzo said, once the two tiny combatants were out cold.

    “Good idea,” Scooter nodded, before turning out the lights.


    “Come in here, I wanna show you something.”

    “Is it a box?”

    “It’s sorta like a box. Close the door.”

    “Hey, darlin’. I thought we came in here for supplies.”

    “Oh, Moi is sure you can supply with exactly what I’m looking for.”



    “Whoa! We have not discussed this!”

    The darkened supply closet was suddenly bathed in light, illuminating the fact that two more occupants had joined the quartet that was already inside. “What’re you two doing in here?” Scooter asked, upon seeing the two new occupants.

    “Why did you close the door!?” Gonzo exclaimed.

    Kermit the Frog and Miss Piggy both stumbled for some sort of explanation as to why they would be in a supply closet and were rapidly failing to come up with a solution. “Well, well, uh…” the frog stuttered. “There is perfectly fine explanation to all of this, but…but…I just came down here for this -” Looking around frantically, Kermit grab the first colorful thing he saw, only realizing that it was a haphazardly discarded red sequined ball gown.

    “So I’ll be going,” he concluded, mustering all the dignity he could in the face of being caught attempting to fool around with his girlfriend in a closet, plus pulling a ball gown that was most certainly not going to fit him, nor was it his color. Storming towards the door, he tried to open it.

    “The door’s broken,” Gonzo huffed.

    “This door’s broken,” Kermit replied, as though he couldn’t believe he was now trapped like the others.

    “Really?” the daredevil asked, sarcastically. “Gosh, if only someone had mentioned that five seconds ago, you wouldn’t have wasted your breath telling us that.”

    “Alright listen,” Piggy huffed. “Moi does not have time for these types of shenanigans, so…what happened to the rat and shrimp?”

    Gonzo shrugged. “They…they were like that when I got here.” Pausing for a moment, he pointed at the red headed manager. “Scooter did it.”

    More to come later!
    newsmanfan likes this.
  13. The Count

    The Count Moderator Staff Member

    *In Abby voice: "There's something I don't quite understand."
    If the closet door's broken/locked from the inside so the Muppets are "trapped" in the closet... Then where's the secret opening? You know, how do more and more Muppets keep getting into the closet in the first place?
    Babs: "That's a plothole big enough to drive a mactruck through!"
    Other than that, is funny okay, and we wants more okay. After ju finish the 5-balls first okay.
  14. WebMistressGina

    WebMistressGina Well-Known Member

    What's that, Pinky?

    Muppets can come in, ie via the door on the outside. They just can't get out. You're a Get Smart fan; remember the self-locking door? Appeared in two episodes.

    No, not really, if you stop to think that opening a door from the outside is easy. It's getting out that's the problem.

    In the 2021 episode, the door is electronic, but same problem - it was easy to use the touch pad to get in, but the pad on the inside (the one to get out) was broken.

    It's like the door in my office - closing it from the outside seems to make it close completely, however when I close it from the inside, it keeps opening for no apparent reason.
  15. The Count

    The Count Moderator Staff Member

    Oh okay, I get it now. It's like the doors we used to have at the library wing for handicapped students at my university, a mat on the floor to make them automatically open. But when the electricity went out, they must have had some sort of extra way to keep them open permanently until the lights came back.

    Never mind me then. *Returns to cleaning KG chapter of awesomeness.
  16. miss kermie

    miss kermie Well-Known Member

    Ha! Closets are always hilarious...
  17. WebMistressGina

    WebMistressGina Well-Known Member

    And here's the finish to our Trapped in a Closet parody!

    “Thanks a lot, Gonzo!”

    “Okay, listen,” Kermit interrupted, knowing a fight when he heard one. “Let’s not panic or anything.”

    “Right,” Gonzo nodded. “Besides, Scooter’s here and he’s got a big brain…”

    “Duh,” agreed Piggy.

    “So?” the weirdo said, indicating the younger Muppet. “Get to it, Hoss.”

    “Are you serious?” the page asked, incredulously. “I’m a manager, not a robot! And if you so much as think that you’re going to use me as some sort of handyman, fixer of doors…”

    “I’ll up your pay by twenty bucks,” Kermit murmured.

    “…then I’m going to need a screwdriver,” the Muppet finished. “Preferably a flat head.”

    “Where are we going to find a screwdriver in a supply closet, MacGyver?” Piggy huffed.

    Scooter glared at her. “I’m sure you have a nail file on your person there, Rambo,” he retorted. “Unless you have something more heavy duty that even the frog hasn’t found.”

    “I’m about to lower that raise of yours,” the frog muttered.

    With tensions reaching new heights, Rizzo thought it was a perfect time to emerge from his ‘nap’. Muttering to himself about uppity shrimp, the rat managed to get to his feet, surprised to see that Kermit and Piggy had joined their little group. It of course was nothing in comparison to the fact that he was now standing and Pepe wasn’t.

    “Yeah!” he warbled. “That’s right, punk! Mama didn’t raise no fool. Fool!” Looking around, he nodded to the new arrivals. “Guys, Princess. Nice of you all to join us in our supply closet of doom.”

    “No worries, Rizzo buddy,” Gonzo replied. “Scooter’s gonna get us out.”


    Pointing a thumb at Piggy, the stuntman said, “Pigbo here keeps a pretty handy switchblade of awesome somewhere on her person that I am most interested to discover.” Leaning over, Gonzo tried to get a peek, only to be halted by a fist in his side, bringing him to his knees on the floor. “Oh heavens! Kidneys!”

    “Oh, stop complaining,” Piggy said, rolling her eyes. “You only need one.”

    “Do you all mind?” the manager sneered, turning away from the door slightly. “Trying to do work here.”

    “Oh!” Rizzo exclaimed, putting a hand to his heart. “Are we disturbing you? Oh, good heavens! Oh my stars! We mustn’t stop the very important work you must be doing right now! Everyone, please! Stop what you’re doing! Stop the presses! Stop the masses! Stop your breathing! The great master and boss, Lord Scooter, is about to…”

    “Do you want this door opened or not?”

    “I do.”

    “Well, okay then!”

    Pepe, who had been knocked cold earlier, managed to stumble his feet right as Scooter was loosening the last screw to the door knob. “What is going on heres?” he asked, confused. Shaking the cobwebs from his little head, Pepe watched as the stage manager was able to undo the inner door knob, allowing the door to open and granting their freedom.

    Only, they weren’t exactly free.

    As soon as Scooter opened the door, a pack of wild dogs was seemingly waiting outside. “Shut it, Scooter! Shut it!” Shutting it quickly, both Scooter and Kermit stood with their backs to the door, hoping to block the dogs from entering.

    “Oh,” Pepe replied, eyes lighting up in remembrance. “Now I remember!”

    “Remember what?” Gonzo hissed.

    “Ju see,” the shrimp began. “I decided to do a good deed, si? So I rescued these nice dogs from the pounds.”

    “Those didn’t look like cute little poodles to me!” Rizzo exclaimed.

    “No, no,” Pepe replied, shaking his head. “The poodles, they goes fer El Pepe! No, those are the dogs from Mexico that I rescused, cause ju know, womens likes it when you rescue things.”

    “We’re going to die in here!” the rat cried.

    “No,” Piggy hissed. “First we’re going to have a shrimp barbeque, then we’re going to die in here.”

    “Si, si,” the prawn nodded. “Except for that bbqs thing and the fact that yo soy King Prawn, h’okay!? But ju are probably right, we will probably die in here, but mira, could be worse h’okay?”


    “How could this be any freaking worse!?”

    “Mira,” the prawn said. “We could be out theres, h’okay? Like the Beakie surgeon man.”

    The group looked at each other. While the theater could be a hustle and bustle of activity, there were days when only a handful of people were around; this day, as well as the previous days for the original trio that had been stuck. If Pepe was right, Dr. Honeydew and Beaker were in the theater or had been in the theater, meaning that poor Beaker was now probably running from both his lab partner and the dogs.

    “You know, it’s not so bad in here,” Scooter commented. “If you put some flowers or plants around…”

    “Soooo,” Gonzo began, leaning over to Piggy. “What was that thing that you and Kermit hadn’t discussed that involved little ole me?”


    “Oh, c’mon! Are you sure it wasn’t something?”


    “Mira, everyone, mira,” Pepe started. “Reezo and I were doing something when Scooter came in, h’okay?” Turning to the rat, he said, “Let’s start when you discover that I am actually my twin sister, h’okay?”

    “Sure,” Rizzo nodded. “What’s her name? I mean, you know, your new name?”

    “Es Lupe, h’okay?”


    “Is that why he’s wearing a dress?” Piggy whispered.

    “It’s really better if you don’t ask,” Gonzo replied. “Frankly, it made more sense when they were doing the Spanish version of this; quite surprised that Rizzo speaks Spanish. Did you know that?”

    “I don’t really care.”
    newsmanfan likes this.
  18. miss kermie

    miss kermie Well-Known Member

    Ha ga ha ha!

    What the heck!

  19. newsmanfan

    newsmanfan Well-Known Member

    Ah. Some good old random absurdist shtick. Wild dogs ate my baby! Very cute. Sometimes ya just gotta go with stuff that makes zero sense, or it wouldn't be the Muppets...

    *throwing random trout into the mix* Wuh-huh-huh!
    miss kermie likes this.
  20. WebMistressGina

    WebMistressGina Well-Known Member

    Sup folks! Firstly, I've been meaning to do this, but big ups to Mr. Count Moderator Guy for putting this on the big ole list of finished fics! I've been meaning to say thanks, so thanks.

    Okay, so proving that not having a job is obviously boring to death, today during nap time, I came up with this idea. So this is an idea, but I wanted to know what everyone thought and perhaps that would be the next story after, you know, I finish the two that I'm working on.

    Here's the idea - in a time travel twist, the Muppets must stop one of their former villains (or new villain, haven't really gotten that far yet) from taking revenge. How, you ask?

    What do you mean you wouldn't ask that? Well, ask it now!

    How, Gina?

    By ensuring that the Muppets never meet!

    So here's a bit of an outline okay?

    The start of the story is typical Muppet Show fashion, when the villain enters and basically has a bone to pick with Kermit. I'm thinking it has to be a past villain or a new villain with ties to a past villain. My immediate thought was the child of Dr. Hopper, so I went with that for a while. The villain then goes back to his lair and wonders if there's a way to break up the Muppets, wishing they had never met in the first place.

    That gives him an idea. Dun dun DUNNNNNNNNN!

    So this little idea looks to be a bit throwback to The Muppet Movie, with some of Meeting at Schotky's and some 5 Ball Cha-Cha and The Muppets 2011 thrown in for good measure. Now for your guys' input. I pretty much have a story here apparently, but I don't have a villain.

    As mentioned, the original idea was that of a child of Doc Hopper, but as I was writing, an idea pushed the idea that maybe it could be Tex Richman, but I kinda don't want to do that. So the question is - old villain or new villain?

    Also, as this is a time travelly piece, how exactly does our villain get a time travel device?

    Oh wait! IDEA! Nevermind, that last one, but as to how this thing would work could be helpful, so sciency-fictiony peeps feel free to reply cause I probably am not gonna be able to do this without some help.

    SO....what do you think?

Share This Page