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Pre-Wedding Jitters ~ A Series of Short Muppet Fan-Fiction Stories

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction and Fan Art' started by theprawncracker, Apr 24, 2008.

  1. theprawncracker Well-Known Member

    Hello readers! Prawnie here again with some new fun for you all! I'm sure you all remember this story: http://forum.muppetcentral.com/showthread.php?t=32464, well if you do, then you remember that it's the first part of a trilogy. The next part is coming up soon, and no, it will not be in this thread. In this thread will be a series of short stories involving the Muppet gang that will bridge the gap from "Men Are Pigs" to the next story. They'll be in short installments updated when ever I have the time to write a new story.

    So here it is, the first installment of "Pre-Wedding Jitters."

    Pre-Wedding Jitters

    The sounds echoed around the fly-wall-paper laden room. The keys clacked down as spindly, green fingers rained down upon each of them. The sound of the keys as they hit the base of the keyboard could easily have been mistaken for tiny little screams from tiny little letters and punctuation marks.

    Kermit the Frog retained his green composure as he typed a rather flustered e-mail to the Electric Company that provided the Muppet Boarding House and the Muppet Theater with power. The letter read as follows:

    "HEY YOU GUYS!
    Pardon my capitalization; it just seemed like the right thing to type. Anyhow, it seems that the electricity in the theater has gone out, I got a call from my go-fer telling me that it was dark and the monsters were scaring him. I don't know why they'd scare him though, the monsters are always out, even in the light. Anyway, I hope we can get the problem worked out soon, let me know what you find out ASAAP ('As soon as amphibianly possible').
    ~ KTF"

    Kermit scratched the back of his neck as he clicked the "Send" button, sending his message through the endless confines of the World-Wide Web. Kermit pushed his bright green laptop forward on his dark green bed spread and reached over to the olive green end table for his dark green coffee mug with his own face drawn in the middle of it.

    The frog sat his mug back on the table and pulled the laptop back towards him. He leaned back against his headboard with his back against a lime-green pillow (tired of the green stuff yet?). Kermit attempted to crack his knuckles and frowned. "I keep forgetting that frogs don't have knuckles," he said.

    Using the mouse (silently Kermit wondered if Miss Piggy ever thought of petitioning a change of name for the mouse, just so Kermit would never touch a mouse), Kermit opened up a new message. He scrolled through his many e-mail contacts (including, but not limited to: Miss Piggy [kissy_kissy@yahoo.com], Miss Piggy's cell phone e-mail address [kissy_kissy_on_the_phone@yahoo.com], Miss Piggy's Paris e-mail address [kissy_kissy_meinParis@yahoo.com], Miss Piggy's salonist's e-mail address [kissy_kissy_help_me@yahoo.com], and Miss Piggy's agent's e-mail address [i_have_individuality@yahoo.com]) and clicked on one in the "S" section of the alphabetical ordering of the list.

    The frog readied his fingers for typing a new e-mail, and the keys readied themselves for another beating. The new message was this:

    "Hi-ho Sesame Street! This is Kermit the Frog here with urgent breaking news! It has just been reported, as I'm sure you all already know, that Miss Piggy and I are finally getting married! Of course you're all being invited to the wedding (whenever we decide it should end up being, a date hasn't been set yet, but we're hoping it's soon!).

    However, I did want to ask Grover if he'd like to be one of my groomsmen in the wedding. It would mean a lot to have one of my furriest, certainly cutest, and definitely most helpful friends in my wedding, so just call whenever you can, and we'll talk about flying you out to California early to get ready for the wedding!

    Hope all is well on the 'Happiest Street in the World'! Can't wait to see you all soon!

    Take care,
    Kermit the Frog"

    "There we are," Kermit said happily, sending off the message, "there's no way that message could be misinterpreted."

    "That's what you think!" shouted the voices of 154 tiny, angry keyboard keys.

    Kermit scrunched up his face in the traditional manner. "Why does everything in this house have to talk?" the frog asked, shutting the laptop and silencing the keyboard voices.
  2. Beauregard Well-Known Member

    Oh my gosh! I looove it! And am the first to post!

    LOVE the discriptione arly on about the keyboard screams, then the actual speaking at the end. LOVE the e-mail addresses, especially Paris. ADORE the discription of Grover!

    And! LOVE IT!

    Bea:zany:{Frogs have knuckles, though...}regard
  3. The Count Moderator

    *Cracking knuckles. Prawn... Chest of drawers, duke of chutney, half of halves, bottomless source of fanfics... This is very nice. So you're taking an approach similar to Sean's. If it works for you, then hey, congrats. And shouldn't you finish PH first though? You've got many a Fraggle in a bind waiting for harmony to come to them.

    But nagging aside... Hey, nagging's what we do best!
    Thanks for sharing this buddy.

    :flirt:
  4. theprawncracker Well-Known Member

    *smirks* Don't you worry pal o' mine, Perfect Harmony will be finished.

    I just don't know when. :p
  5. Vic Romano Active Member

    Wow, Ry; what great writing! And fun-ee! I loved the "HEY YOU GUYS!" letter to the Electric Company. You have a real sense of the Muppet's humor, which you think a lot of people here would, but I think it's a lot more difficult to write that very unique and recognizable style.
  6. theprawncracker Well-Known Member

    *blush* Well thank you very much Dave! That means SO much coming from you! Thanks a lot for stopping by to read, and again, thanks for the compliments, they really mean a lot.
  7. BeakerSqueedom Active Member

    :O The talented, wonderful Prawn has yet again impressed me with this chappy installment. Oh my, I wait for more! :0

    Series, is it?

    SQUUUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
    Go Prawnie...
    Go Prawnie....
    YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYY!

    Great chapter!
  8. The Count Moderator

    Psst... Hey youz... Yeah, youz Squeaky goil. Youz like this story by da guy what be known as Prawny? Then you'll love this. I can get youz a copy of da original,da exclusive, da greatest... Men Are Pigs. And all it'll cost ya is a nickel, and a PM saying you wanna poichase this masterpiece of Muppet literatoir. Shhh, riiight. :shifty:
  9. redBoobergurl Well-Known Member

    Prawnie, I glomp you! This was great! The emails were awesome and I just LOVE when a writer gets inside Kermit's mind! Love it, hug it, squeeze it, can't wait to read more of it! Dave is right, you do have a sense of the Muppets sense of humor and if you can make sense of this sentence then kudos to you. Yes yes, why make sense when it's more profitable to make dollars. Ok, I'll stop now.
  10. Fragglemuppet Well-Known Member

    Oh my, I guess I'm feeling just a bit slow this morning. It wasn't 'til I read Dave's post that I got the Electric Company joke!
    :o
    Ryan, this is truly wonderful, and I was excited to see another fanfic with your name on it, because I knew it would be terrific!

    So more please!
  11. Muppetfan44 Active Member

    Love it!

    I totally love this and I can't wait for the next part of the trilogy! Way to go, funny and full of muppety style and goodness as always. Keep up the great work!

    :wisdom: After graduation on Sunday, I will officially be a University of Pittsburgh Alumni!
  12. WhiteRabbit Well-Known Member

    Prawnie, this is a great fanfic! I've read some of your other ones before and you're an amazing writer! Can't wait for the update! =)
  13. theprawncracker Well-Known Member

    "A date?"

    "Yes, a date!"

    "I knew we forgot something!"

    Kermit tried to pretend that the floor of the Muppet Boarding House living room wasn't shaking. Miss Piggy tossed her golden locks of hair behind her head as she looked up at Kermit from her most recent exercise venture; doing sit-ups while reading a magazine Bean Bunny held in front of her.

    Kermit smiled as he watched Piggy move up and down in her sparkling designer workout suit. Her curves were especially curvy when she--

    Kermit cleared his throat at an attempt to clear his mind. "Anyway Piggy I just thought we might need to get a date set soon so I can tell everyone on Sesame Street, everyone in the swamp, and well..."

    "Everyone?" Bean Bunny answered.

    "Yeah, them," Kermit said.

    Piggy did another sit-up, "Page!" she shouted as Bean fumbled to turn to the next advertisement. "Oh Kermie, moi agrees with vous of course dear," she said to her frog in between each sit-up. "But does it have to be now that we pick a date? Moi happens to be a little preoccupado dear."

    "Yes, I can see that," Kermit said as he leaned against the maroon armchair.

    "Well then scram, will ya?" she asked angrily. "I hate it when people watch me exercise!"

    Kermit smiled. "Alright Piggy, good luck," he said as he began to head towards the kitchen.

    "Kermie?" she called to him sweetly.

    Kermit turned around. "Yes?"

    "I love you."

    Kermit blushed happily. "I love you too Piggy."

    "Yes, I know," Piggy said smugly.

    Kermit smirked and continued his walk to the kitchen, ducking under an oncoming boomerang fish.

    "Psst, Kermit," a timid voice whispered to the frog.

    Kermit looked around the dining room. "Oh come on, don't tell me the walls talk now too," he said.

    "No, not the walls, the bear," said the voice again.

    Kermit looked around again. "Fozzie, where are you?"

    "Down here," the voice said, putting a face to itself as Fozzie Bear poked his furry brown face out from underneath the tablecloth of the incredibly long dining room table.

    Kermit bent down. "Fozzie what are you doing down there?" Kermit asked.

    "Scraping the underbelly of the table for jokes," Fozzie said.

    "Why on earth would you be doing that?" Kermit asked.

    "I got tired of scraping the bottom of the barrel," Fozzie said plainly.

    Kermit smirked. "Was that supposed to make me laugh?"

    "I don't really know," Fozzie said.

    "Did you need something?" Kermit asked.

    "Oh, oh, yeah!" Fozzie said, crawling out from under the table. "I--uh, well, I needed to ask you something."

    "No Fozzie," Kermit said, "I did not cut your act from this week's show."

    "Ahh! That's great!" Fozzie said. "But not what I wanted to ask you about."

    "Well I'm listening," Kermit said.

    "Am I invited to the wedding?" Fozzie asked sheepishly.

    Kermit scrunched up his face. "Fozzie! Of course you're invited!" the frog said. "You're my best man!"

    Fozzie gasped. "I--I am?" Fozzie asked, shocked by this new development.

    "Of course you are," Kermit said. "Who else would I ask to be my best man, you're my best friend!"

    "Well you're always passing notes to Scooter," Fozzie said. "I thought maybe you were going to ask him."

    "Fozzie," Kermit chided the bear gently. "I pass Scooter notes to tell him to get things done around the theater. You're my one and only best friend."

    "You mean it?" Fozzie asked happily. "Oh Kermit, thank you!" Fozzie said, pulling Kermit into a hug and jumping up and down. "You won't regret this, I promise!"

    "I know I won't," Kermit squeaked form inside the bear hug. "Can you put me down now?"

    Fozzie quickly did as he was asked and Kermit gained air back into his froggy lungs. "Thank you. Now c'mon," Kermit said, "I need to go find Gonzo and Rowlf to ask them if they want to be in the wedding party too."

    Fozzie gasped. "Neither of them are your best man too, are they?"

    Kermit scrunched up his face. "Fozzie!"
  14. The Count Moderator

    *Glomps Prawn. *Runs away to next fic like Grover normally would. Hey, wait a second... Wasn't Grover planned for some special honor too? Oh well, seeing as how he and Fozzie are equals in Kermit's—and the prawn's—eyes...
  15. BeakerSqueedom Active Member

    Kermie thinking naughty, eh?
    Cheeky little frog! Tryin' tah check out ze Piggy...

    AWWW!
    I loved the fluff between Fozzie and Kermit.
    <3

    *MELT*
  16. Muppetfan44 Active Member

    Great Chapter

    Great Chapter! I love the whole part where fozzie is scraping the underbelly of the table for jokes; classic!

    Anxiously awaiting further updates!


    :wisdom: this time tomorrow= me as a Pitt Grad!
  17. Fragglemuppet Well-Known Member

    Congradulations Ariane!
    :)

    Yeah, this is awesome! I love seeing muppet best friends interact! Philo and Gunge, Kermit and Fozzie, Kermit and Rowlf, Gobo and Wembly... You know the type!
  18. Beauregard Well-Known Member

    Oh Prawnie, I love it! And I adore Fozzie's innocent cuteness, without being stupid with him. I simply LOVE how you've written Piggy here!
  19. redBoobergurl Well-Known Member

    Aww, so cute with Fozzie and you just have him so in character, I love it. Funny bits with Piggy and the exercising too. Oh Prawnie, come on, give us some more!
  20. BeakerSqueedom Active Member

    Post...;_;
    -clings-

    POOSSTT...

    [Will send you the files today, btw]

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