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TMS outline- James Caan!

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by Gorgon Heap, Feb 3, 2003.

  1. Gorgon Heap

    Gorgon Heap Well-Known Member



    Fozzie joke: “I went to a football game so bad, the players were leaving early to beat the traffic. Wocka wocka!”
    James Caan: in the Talk Spot set with the Muppets, including Piggy, Fozzie, Gonzo, Scooter, Hilda, George and Janice
    Gonzo: chops the ‘O’ with an axe

    SONG: “Satisfaction”- the Electric Mayhem

    Waldorf: “I can’t get any satisfaction either.”

    Statler: “How could you? Look where we are.”

    Backstage: Gonzo is upset that Kermit didn’t schedule his act into the show and won’t make room, so Gonzo schemes to get onstage.

    SONG: “Little Green Apples”- James sings while strolling through a sunlit suburban neighborhood on a pleasant Saturday afternoon

    Waldorf: “Ah, nice number. That James Caan is a real mammoth talent.”

    Statler: “Well if anybody would know, it’s you. Who else had a mammoth for a pet? HA HA HA HA HA!”

    Backstage: Gonzo approaches Kermit with an idea for a new act- eating the stage curtain to the tune of Beethoven’s Minuet in G, but Kermit turns him down.

    At the Dance

    Vet’s Hospital- Dr. Bob operates on the Guru, who would rather have traditional herbal remedies

    Gangster sketch- in a nightclub, Luca Bartola (James) and his gang, which includes Benny the Nose (Gonzo) and George the Janitor (“he’s called The Janitor because he cleans up after my messes!” “Maybe you should stop eating with your fingers then!”) face off against Jerry the Comic (Fozzie) and his right-hand men Scooter the Gofer and Sid the Kneecap (Boppity Frackle). Piggy is Luca’s moll and Gloat (in drag) is Jerry’s (“How did this happen?”)

    Waldorf: “They should do something about those gangsters.”

    Statler: “Yeah... get ‘em off the stage, for one thing!”

    S & W: “AH HA HA HA HA!”

    The Houses- “I hear your son the restaurant is becoming interested in athletics.” “Interested? He’s talking about becoming a sports club.”

    UK Spot: “Dancing Queen”- as sung by Janice et al, as Piggy and other female Muppets (including Gorgon Heap’s wife, Zola) take to the dance floor (in red-lit At the Dance set)

    Talk Spot: interrupted by Gonzo; Gonzo tells Kermit that his dressing room is on fire (due to Gonzo using his boss’s dressing room to rehearse his flamethrower juggling act); once Gonzo has the audience’s attention, he tries to do his own act- sewing a button onto a watermelon, until Kermit comes back and gets rid of him.

    Waldorf: “That Great Gonzo sure causes a lot of vexation around here.”

    Statler: “Oh, they should take some penicillin for that.”

    Waldorf: “What we have here is a failure to communicate.”

    Fozzie’s Monologue- after Fozzie refuses Gonzo’s request to cut his act short, Gonzo does it for him with the aid of some banana peels

    Waldorf: “Hooray!”

    Statler: “Bravo!”

    Waldorf: “Wonderful! I tell you, that’s the best act old Fozzie’s ever done!”

    Statler: “Yeah, and it’s the best thing the little blue geek’s ever done, too!”

    S & W: “AH HA HA HA HA!”

    Wayne & Wanda- “If Ever I Would Leave You”- Wanda sings, but get carried away by Thig

    Wings: Gonzo pays off Thig for carrying off Wanda thus ending their act.

    Thig: “I feel almost guilty for taking money for it.”

    Gonzo: Not to worry.”

    Thig: “You sure this is okay?”

    Gonzo: “Sure. Bon appetit.”

    Thig: “All right!”

    Muppet News- “Popular nightclub singer Enzo Fiamma(James) announced today that he will postpone his current tour.” Turns out he has a frog in his throat (as evidenced by the sound of his voice- and I don’t need to tell you how that gag will work!)

    Backstage: after a lot of aggravation, Kermit finally agrees to let Gonzo go on

    Gonzo saws a bowling ball in half to the tune of Khatchaturian’s “Saber Dance”

    Statler: “You know all that good stuff we said about Gonzo earlier?”

    Waldorf: “Wanna take it back?”

    Statler: “Lets, please!”

    CLOSING NUMBER: “Love, I Hear”- James sings to Miss Piggy

    Curtain: James, Kermit, Piggy, Fozzie, Gonzo, Scooter, Janice, George and Hilda

    Statler: “This show raises an important question.”

    Waldorf: “What’s that?”

    Statler: “Why do they do it?”

    David "Gorgon Heap" Ebersole
  2. Daffyfan4ever

    Daffyfan4ever Well-Known Member


    That was good. It's been a while since we had a new outline up. Just a few comments.

    I don't quite get that one. Could you explain it?

    By the way, don't you mean "Thog" instead of "Thig?"

    I also liked how you included everything in the first season theme: Fozzie's joke, Gonzo's gong, etc. I thought of doing that for my Davy Jones episode, but I couldn't come up with any ideas for that.

    Anyway, overall, I enjoyed that. By the way, I'm working on a TMS outline with Charo. If it's good enough, I'll put it up when I'm finished.
  3. Gorgon Heap

    Gorgon Heap Well-Known Member

    Re: Reply

    That was one I struggled a lot with. I wanted a misunderstanding joke, like this one from the Bruce Forsyth ep:

    Waldorf: "That Miss Piggy takes umbrage at the slightest annoyance."
    Statler: "Oh, I usually take aspirin. Maybe I'll try some umbrage."

    In the end I'm not sure if mine worked very well.

    Actually no. Thig and Thog both originally debuted as a pair in "The Great Santa Claus Switch" in 1970. Thig didn't appear much after that, but Thog popped up in the Valentine Special and on TMS. You can see a picture of Thig here:


    He is round like Thog, but is green and about two feet shorter. He was voiced by Frank Oz. I wanted to include him at some point seeing as he was gone after that special as far as I know. Anyone know if Thig ever appeared in anything else?

    David "Gorgon Heap" Ebersole
  4. Daffyfan4ever

    Daffyfan4ever Well-Known Member


    I see. Well, actually, I don't see because the pictures won't load on my computer, but I see what you mean.
  5. Gorgon Heap

    Gorgon Heap Well-Known Member

    Anybody else have any comments? Favorite parts? Suggestions for improvement?

    I thought this one was kind of dry, dull, and predictable compared to some of my other ones. But then again, it matches the style in which I set it:D

    David "Gorgon Heap" Ebersole
  6. Gorgon Heap

    Gorgon Heap Well-Known Member

    A side note- think of this one as being around the same time as the Lena Horne and Peter Ustinov episodes.

    Sadly, I personally think this one kind of matches the other two for staleness lol.

    David "Gorgon Heap" Ebersole
  7. Gorgon Heap

    Gorgon Heap Well-Known Member

    Bumping this year-and-a-half old clunker back up to the top of the list! Hehe! :crazy:

    David "Gorgon Heap" Ebersole
  8. TotallySpiesFan

    TotallySpiesFan Well-Known Member

    I think of circa Ben Vereen & Phyllis Diller.
  9. Do any other muppets appear in this number...or is it James alone?

    Which female muppets appear in this number, besides Janice, Piggy and Zola? I suppose that Wanda, Hilda, Mildred, "Sexy Muppet", the Green Scoff, some what-nots, etc. are among them.

    And is Zola really the Gorgon Heap puppet in drag? Are any of the other male monsters (Boppity, Gloat, etc.) in this number in drag?
  10. TotallySpiesFan

    TotallySpiesFan Well-Known Member

    Yes, there are some Whatnots, as well as Scooter and George.

    Wanda, some Whatnots, a pink Muppet who sings "You Do Something To Me", and Youknow Bird.

    Zola is really the Boppity puppet in drag from a special Vincent Price episode's "At the Dance".
  11. I just figured out that why GH gave Gorgon Heap's wife the name Zola...it seems that it's an inside-joke referring to gorgonzola, which is a type of cheese.

    So, unless GH says otherwise, her full name must be Gorgon Zola.
  12. Gorgon Heap

    Gorgon Heap Well-Known Member

    Close enough. You got the joke all right, I just figure their names are Gorgon & Zola Heap. And btw, you were right and TSF was wrong- I envisioned Zola Heap as being Gorgon in drag.

    Whatnots, a la "Mr. Cellophane" in the Ben Vereen episode (and maybe George & Mildred).

    Yeah, you called it. Add Miss Mousey and that pretty much covers it.

    Check that. Add Boppity in drag as well.

    David "Gorgon Heap" Ebersole
  13. Would Zelda Rose and Mary Louise be in that number as well, as well as any other female muppets that I didn't mention previously?
  14. Also, which muppet appear in "At the Dance".
  15. GH, if you haven't decided yet, maybe the couples in this "At the Dance" segment could be George & Mildred, Janice & Zoot, Lenny the Lizard & a what-not woman, Rover Joe & Catgut, the Scoffs, Taminella & Svengali and Wally (from "The Muppet Valentine Show") & the Trumpet Lady.

    And back to the subject of Gorgon and Zola Heap, I also get the joke in another yet, in the fact thay their first names are Gorgon and Zola, which would sound like gorgonzola (the type of cheese) if/when put together.
  16. Princeton

    Princeton Guest

    I don't believe Taminella was ever on TMS.
  17. Who performed the following characters:

    -the whatnots in "Little Green Apples"
    -the "At the Dance" cast
    -Miss Piggy (in the gangster sketch and UK Spot)
    -Zola Heap
    -Sexy Muppet
    -the Green Scoff
    -Miss Mousey

    I suppose the role of Thig would be reprised by Frank Oz and that if the houses in the talking houses sketch are the two on the left, they'd be played by John Lovelady and Dave Goelz again and if it was the two on the right, they'd be played by Frank Oz and Eren Ozker. Right?

    And do you like my suggestions for "At the Dance"? If you do, who'd perform them?
  18. TotallySpiesFan

    TotallySpiesFan Well-Known Member

    Whatnots in Little Green Apples- John Lovelady, Eren Ozker, Dave Goelz, Richard Hunt, Jerry Nelson
    Cast of At the Dance- Jim Henson, Frank Oz, Richard Hunt, Jerry Nelson, Dave Goelz, John Lovelady, Eren Ozker
    Boppity- Jerry Nelson
    Gloat- Eren Ozker
    Miss Piggy- Frank Oz in both segments
    Zola Heap- Dave Goelz
    Sexy Muppet- Eren Ozker
    Green Scoff- Richard Hunt
    Miss Mousey- Jerry Nelson

    Well, actually, the two houses on the left would be played by John Lovelady and Jerry Nelson. As for Thig, Frank Oz never performed him. He was performed by Jerry Nelson.

    Think this episode circa Ben Vereen, Phyllis Diller eps.


    Dave "Gorgon Heap" Ebersole, where are you?:cry:
  20. Gorgon Heap

    Gorgon Heap Well-Known Member

    None of the women in "Dancing Queen" have any solo lines. They all pretty much sing together.


    Jerry and John played the houses on the left, Frank and Eren played the ones on the right.

    George & Mildred and Zoot & Janice I'd of course use. I like the Rover Joe & Catgut idea, and Taminella & Svengali I could use, either for this one or another one. The Scoffs, and Lenny the Lizard with a Whatnot woman I've already used, so obviously I like them ;)

    David "Gorgon Heap" Ebersole

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