An Unooficial Message for Prawnie

[dwayne1115]

Mr. Dwayne (Walks in and looks around) Well See here is where you boys have messed up. You have hired someone, when you can easily get someone to do your work for you for free.
I went down to my local collage and found some collage kids to do my work for me for food. Ahhh Interns how great they will do what i tell them what to do and when i tell them to do it. I liked one of the interns so much have made him my man servant. He is Willber he will now take over and talk for me... Carry on willber!


Willber: Thank you Sir, I hope i do well and type fast and spell your words right sir.


Dwayne: You better or i will spank you like a bad bad donkey ok!

 

[D'Snowth]

To whom it may concern,

Please, I am begging all of you, please get me away from this pink person, who is always harassing me, the last thing I need is to be forced to be his secretary. At the same time, I still ask that someone help me find a good lawyer, so that I may finally file a restraining order against him.

Warmest regards,
Ms. Da Pest - Forced against her will to be secretary to Ban Moeder

 

[The Count]

Mr. Castle asks if Ms. DaPest's first name happens to be Jeanette or Kathy or Eleanor. If not, then he recommends seeking aid from his associates at Wolfram & Hart.

Shriekcy.

 

[D'Snowth]

Dear Mr. Castle,

Um... yes, yes, my name is Jeanette, though my big sister has suggested that I change my appearance and my name, but I digress, I'm fine with who I am, and feel I should be able to be myself without having this pink thing always tag along...

Can you please help me?

Warmest regards,
Ms. Da Pest - Forced secretary to Man Berdoe

 

[The Count]

Mr. Castle asks if this forced secretarial servitude stems from the failed attempted wedding between yourself and said pink fluffy thing. If so, we further recommend contacting Ms. Beak R. Fan as she would be best to safely rescue you from such kidnapping. If she does not reply promptly, then our representative, namely the Man himself shall see to your case. Until then, we suggest a bit of patience as your number is processed, reached and serviced through our system. Thank you.

Shriekcy.

*Slides board shut.
*Slides it open again... #96, Persephone! #96... Mr. Castle will see you now.
*Slides board shut again.

 

[D'Snowth]

Dear Shrieky,

Please tell Mr. Castle that, yes... he had to bring that marriage up, didn't he? Thank goodness that failed, ha ha, but I guess I shouldn't have washed that temporary tattoo off of my lower back.

I am completely familiar with Ms. Beak R. Fan, a wonderful person; I would feel really safe and secure with an attorney like her.

I will try to be patient, but please hurry, I'm getting vibes around here, since I'm forced to be a stereotypical, sophisticated, yet sexy secretary...

Warmest regards,
Ms. Da Pest - Forced secretary to, oh who cares?

 

[dwayne1115]

Mr Dwayne wants to know where is the Beef?

 

[Beakerfan]

Dear Ms. Da Pest,

Please inform your employer that if he does not take actions to correct the situation at hand I shall be more than happy to take him to court. Please remind him also that he is in violation of child labor laws, human rights, and the secretary union. Not that it surprises me.

Sincerely,
Beak R. Fan, Attorney at Law

 

[D'Snowth]

Dearest Ms. Beak R. Fan,

Do you think it would also be wise if I were to contact PETA on him? Other than that, I have forwarded your message to him, but he just laughed, and asked me out to lunch...

I'm thinking I would like my restraining order to state he can't come within 2,184 miles of myself.

Warmest regard,
Ms. Da Pest - I can type 85 words a minute.

 

[The Count]

Mr. Castle opines that such a request wouldn't be feasible, as you would be in violation of such an order already. Furthermore, he strongly advises to go nowhere near PETA, known also as People for the Eating of Tasty Animals. The best course of action is to condemn your "employer" to a fate similar to your own, entrapment for eternity either subyugated to others as a d'jin or simply have his soul essence drained away into one of our conveniently labeled little viles. If you still wish us to take your case, please visit our offices and take a number after 160 as everything previous that has already been reserved by other clients. Thank you for understanding.

Shriekcy.
*Dreamily sighing over her own boss as he arrives in underworldly robes.