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Favorite Statler & Waldorf Quotes

Discussion in 'Classic Muppets' started by Extell, Jan 14, 2003.

  1. From the Muppetisms:

    Statler: I went snowboarding yesterday.
    Waldorf: That's nothing. I cut all the fiber out of my diet.
    Statler: What? You're a mad man!
    Waldorf: Born to be wild, baby! Eat my dust!
    Statler: Eat your dust? If you were any older, you'd be dust!
  2. Both: Boo! Boo!
    Sheep: Baa! Baa!
    Both: Humbug! Humbug!
  3. From the Don Knotts ep. of "The Muppet Show":

    Statler: I know what's wrong with this show! It's the theater!
    Waldorf: What's wrong with it?
    Statler: The seats face the stage!

    From the Andy Williams ep. of "The Muppet Show":

    Statler: I thought that number was gonna be good, and then...
    Waldorf: Then what?
    Statler: Then they raised the curtain!

    From the Rich Little ep. of "The Muppet Show":

    Waldorf: Wha...? What did I miss?
    Statler: Oh, nothing. They just 'bombed' again.
  4. Cantus Rock

    Cantus Rock Well-Known Member

    From "The Muppets Go Hollywood":

    S: They say this is a very "In" party.
    W: Why do they say that?
    S: Because you can't get out!

    From the Juliet Prowse episode of the Muppet Show:

    S: The question is, what is a "Mahna Mahna"?
    W: The question is, who cares?

    From Muppet*Vision 3D:

    (after Fozzie sprays water on the crowd)
    S: He's trying to drown us! What kind of an act is that?!
    W: An act of mercy!

    Doh ho ho ho!

    Gotta love :boo: & :sleep:

  5. From the Marty Feldman ep. of "The Muppet Show":

    Statler: I don't think that was Sinbad.
    Waldorf: No, but it was certainly "sung bad"!

    Waldorf: How should we know how to get to Sesame Street?
    Statler: We don't even know how to get out of this stupid theater box!

    From the Liberace ep. of "The Muppet Show":

    Statler: Finally, we've seen them do a good show!
    Waldorf: Good! Can we stop coming now?

    I also like Statler & Waldorf's wisecracks in Fozzie's monologues, the Statler & Waldorf comments in the "Jim Henson's Muppets" Game Boy Color game and even the Statler & Waldorf comments in Travelling Matt's Muppet Show outlines.
  6. Daffyfan4ever

    Daffyfan4ever Well-Known Member

    I have yet to see one of those. Did those last past the first season?

    Oh, here's another one. I don't know which ep it's from since I just heard it on MC radio. Anyway, here it is.

    Statler: That was a real wire act.

    Waldorf: On this show, everything's a wire act.

    Statler: Why's that?

    Waldorf: Because, you keep asking "Wire they doing it?"
  7. Mary Louise

    Mary Louise Well-Known Member

    Here's a quote I like from the Chris Langham episode of the Muppet Show. Statler and Waldorf are conversing in their theater box after a backstage scene...

    Waldorf: Well, if you ever think about it, there are these strange pauses in this show when nothing happens onstage.
    Statler: Let's not think about it!
  8. ploobis

    ploobis Well-Known Member

    :boo: "Wake up you old fool! You slept through the show!"

    :sleep: "Who's the old fool? You watched it!"

  9. Nekoshema

    Nekoshema Well-Known Member

    man, i have so many, i can't remember most. just for nostalgia, i'd say the one from muppets family christmas is probably on my top list
    "sure, we'd love to see your act."
    "in fact we'd hate to miss your act."
    "in fact we'd love to hate your act."

    or maybe

    "hey, they make a great team, the snow man's ice cold and the bear's not so hot."

    hee, man, they're awesome :sleep::boo:
  10. Quesal

    Quesal Well-Known Member

    Alright frog we watched the show

    yeah unlock the doors!
  11. Nekoshema

    Nekoshema Well-Known Member

    :sleep: "well that's something new. they've never gone up a tree before!"
    :boo: "no, they usually just go out on a limb!"
  12. Quesal

    Quesal Well-Known Member

    Hey any sign of Statler of Waldorf?

    No Looks like they split for good! Maybe they didn't like the acoustics.

    Why? Can't you hear what being said on stage?

    Every word! *Floyd's Laugh*
  13. Bleyd

    Bleyd New Member

  14. Quesal

    Quesal Well-Known Member

    ya know I really like that

    yep me too

    are we in the right theatre?
  15. Scooterthegofer

    Scooterthegofer Well-Known Member

    I can name a few:

    S: The question is, what exactly is a mahna-mahna?
    W: The question is, who cares!

    W: Where is the land of the rising sun?
    S: I don't know, I never get up that early!

    W: We look like members of the rock age!
    S: No, we look more like members of the stone age!

    This one needs some explaining: at the end of the cluckitis episode, Statler and Waldorf show up as (I think) badgers.
    S: I suppose you were expecting chickens!
    W: yeah, woof woof!
  16. Frogster

    Frogster Well-Known Member

    :boo: Do you think this show constitutes cruelty to animals?
    :sleep: Not unless they're watching it!
  17. izzyusa

    izzyusa New Member

    Which Episode are these Quotes From?

    Hello everybody, I am desperately trying to find which episodes have Statler and Waldorf saying the lines below: #1 - What did you think of Lynda(or Linda)? - She was terrific - What about that rubber band? - Make it into a tire and drive it to Pittsburgh #2 That's an exchange where they start rating a show as great and ends in terrible! - That was wonderful! - Bravo! - I loved it! - Ah, it was great! - Well, it was pretty good. - Well, it wasn't bad... - Uh, there were parts of it that weren't very good though. - It could have been a lot better. - I didn't really like it. - It was pretty terrible. - It was bad. - It was awful! - It was terrible! - Take 'em away! - Bah, boo! - Boo! Thanks! Izzy!
  18. The Count

    The Count Moderator Staff Member

    Hi and welcome to Muppet Central.

    The first quote you asked about comes from the Linda Carter episode, from Season 4.
    The second, I don't exactly know where.

    Hope this helps and have fun exploring the rest of the forums. :batty: :wisdom:
  19. izzyusa

    izzyusa New Member

    That was fast!
    Thanks Count!
    I'll keep searching for that 2nd one! :)
    Best regards!
  20. JaniceFerSure

    JaniceFerSure Well-Known Member

    Linda Carter episode, she sang with the Rubber Band.

    The Statler & Waldorf quote, I can't find the episode, sorry.

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