Mikealan's skit with Harvey Kneeslapper Take 1...

[Splurge]

Very clever twist.

 

[ssetta]

I don't think they would ever do it, but here's one:

Harvey: 'Scuze me, would you like to ENTER?
AM: What say?
Harvey: I say, would you like to ENTER?
AM: Sure.
Harvey: Okay, press the ENTER key.
AM: (presses key)
Harvey: That's ENTER!!!!!
AM: (runs off)

 

[mikealan]

Here are quite a few I thought of:

The 'E' Sketch:

Harvey Kneeslapper: Um, 'scuze me, did I ever send you e-mail?
Black-Haired Fat Blue Anything Muppet: What's that?
Harvey Kneeslapper: I say did I ever send you e-mail? A'ha ha ha ha ha!
Black-Haired Fat Blue Anything Muppet: No.
Harvey Kneeslapper: (slaps the huge purple letter E with a stamp on the AM's chest) Here's your E-mail!!! A'ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!
(The AM runs off, ending music plays)

The 'F' Sketch:

Harvey Kneeslapper: Um, 'scuze me, did you ever get an 'F' at school?
Black-Haired Fat Blue Anything Muppet: What's that?
Harvey Kneeslapper: I say did you ever get an 'F' at school? A'ha ha ha!
Black-Haired Fat Blue Anything Muppet: No, I never got it on my tests at school.
Harvey Kneeslapper: I think you DO get a 'F' today at school! (Slaps the letter F on the AM's chest) A'HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!
(The AM runs off, ending music plays)

The 'K' Sketch:

Harvey Kneeslapper: A'ha ha ha ha ha ha! Are you Okay?
Black-Haired Fat Blue Anything Muppet: What's that?
Harvey Kneeslapper: I say are you okay?!? A'HA HA HA HA HA HA!
Black-Haired Fat Blue Anything Muppet: Yeah, I guess I am.
Harvey Kneeslapper: (Slaps the letter K on the AM's chest) All right, you're O-K to go! A'HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!
(The AM runs off, ending music plays)

The 'O' Sketch:

Harvey Kneeslapper: A'ha ha ha ha ha ha!!! Would you like me to owe your money?
Black-Haired Fat Blue Anything Muppet: 'Scuze me?
Harvey Kneeslapper: I say would you like me to owe your money? A'ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Black-Haired Fat Blue Anything Muppet: Yeah, sure, I'd love to owe my money. (Gives money to Harvey)
Harvey Kneeslapper: (Slaps the letter O on the AM's chest) A'ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!
Black-Haired Fat Blue Anything Muppet: (who is getting really, REALLY angry now) Aaaaaagggghhh! (runs off angrily to chase Harvey, ending music plays)

The 'W' Sketch:

NOTE: Bert and Harvey are about to appear in the same sketch

Harvey Kneeslapper: A'ha ha ha ha ha ha! Do you know what U + U equal to?
Bert: What's that? I can't hear you.
Harvey Kneeslapper: I say do you know what U + U equal to? A'ha ha ha!
Bert: Yeah, the letter W. And you know, W is my favorite letter.
Harvey Kneeslapper: (Slaps the letter W on Bert's chest) Okay, here's W! A'ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!
(Bert likes the letter W, but he does not like the jokes from Harvey.)
Bert: You know, I like the letter W, but I never like silly jokes from Ernie. (Gets really mad now.) Mmmmmm! ERNIE!!! (Runs off, ending music plays, but I doubt that it's not Ernie, it's Harvey!)

The 'Y' Sketch:

Harvey Kneeslapper: Um, 'scuze me, do you know why I'm here?
Black-Haired Fat Blue Anything Muppet: What's that?
Harvey Kneeslapper: I say do you know why I'm here? A'ha ha ha!
Black-Haired Fat Blue Anything Muppet: No, why?
Harvey Kneeslapper: Because I like to know why! (Slaps the letter Y on the AM's head) Ooops! Am I bad! (Takes the Y off the AM's head and slaps it on the AM's chest) A'ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
(The AM runs off, ending music plays)

The 'ICUP' Sketch:

Harvey Kneeslapper: Pssst! Hee hee hee hee hee hee. I see you pee!
Black-Haired Fat Blue Anything Muppet (who is now played by Jerry Nelson): What?
Harvey Kneeslapper: (Yelling) I see you pee!
Black-Haired Fat Blue Anything Muppet: Where? Where?
Harvey Kneeslapper: Right here!! (Slaps the letter I on the AM's chest) Here's I! Next, I will give you a C. (Slaps the letter C on the AM's chest next to the I) And up next is U! (Slaps the letter U on the AM's chest next to the C) Now, here's P. (Slaps the letter P on the AM's chest next to the U) I see you pee! A'HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!!!!!!
Black-Haired Fat Blue Anything Muppet: AAAAAAGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!
(Ending music plays, AM begins to chase Harvey angrily)

 

[ssetta]

Those are hilarious!

 

[mikealan]

Hey, I thought of a GREAT one!!! This should be the one about the Nestle Wonderball candy, but it's not really candy, well here it is:

Harvey Kneeslapper:
(To the television viewer)
Hello, Harvey Kneeslapper here. A'HA HA HA HA HA HA HA! I've got this plastic ball here and I've put the surprise in it. It's called a "Wonderball". A'ha ha ha ha ha ha! All I'm gonna do here is that if some kid would like to wonder what's inside the Wonderball, I will throw it to him. And if some kid wouldn't like to wonder what's inside the Wonderball, well, I will smash it to him or her! A'HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!! Oh, hey, I think some kid is here. Here I go...

(Scene switch to a purple little boy Anything Muppet. Harvey enters.)

Harvey Kneeslapper: A'ha ha ha ha ha ha! Hey, do you wanna wonder what's inside a Wonderball?

Anything Muppet (Jerry Nelson): Hmm, what was that?

Harvey Kneeslapper: I say do you wanna wonder what's inside a Wonderball? A'ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Anything Muppet: Yeah, sure...I really want to wonder what's inside a Wonderball...I think it would be my favorite food.

Harvey Kneeslapper: (Opens the ball and throws toppings of a hamburger to the AM) A'HA HA HA HA HA HA! They were your un-favorite toppings of your hamburger! A'HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!! (Laughs uncontrollably)

Anything Muppet: Aaaaagggggghhhhhh!!! (Ending music plays, chases Harvey after)

 

[mikealan]

Actually, I'd better fix a tiny bit on my Harvey Kneeslapper's 'STOP' pun skit. I'd better start again:

The 'STOP' Pun

Harvey Kneeslapper: (looking through a giant orange envelope) A'HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!! Do you wanna stop?

Anything Muppet: 'Scuze me?

Harvey Kneeslapper: I say, do you wanna stop? A'ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Anything Muppet: Yeah, sure....I want to stop.

Harvey Kneeslapper: (Takes the 'STOP' sign out of the orange envelope and slaps it on the AM's chest) There! You gotta stop! A'HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!

(The AM runs off)

Now, here's the other fan-fiction Harvey Kneeslapper sketch of the number 5...

Harvey Kneeslapper: 'Scuze me-would you like me to give you a hi-five?
Black-Haired Fat Blue Anything Muppet: What's that?
Harvey Kneeslapper: I'm asking if you would like me to give you a hi-five! A'ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Black-Haired Fat Blue Anything Muppet: Yeah, sure...give me a hi-five.
Harvey Kneeslapper: (Slaps the number '5' on the AM's head) Five! A'ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!
(The AM runs off, ending music plays.)

Would this short be super fan-fic?

 

[ssetta]

That's actually not a bad idea, but I kind of think the number 5 segment with him that already exists is more sophisticated.

 

[mikealan]

I thought of a couple of the skits with Harvey Kneeslapper that were never on Sesame Street:

Harvey Kneeslappper: A'HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA! Hey, what's up?
Black-Haired Fat Blue Anything Muppet: Say what?
Harvey Kneeslapper: A'HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!! I said, what's up?
Black-Haired Fat Blue Anything Muppet: Oh, I'm feeling fine. How are you?...
Harvey Kneeslapper: (interrupting him) Um, I think you've said the different meaning of up.
Black-Haired Fat Blue Anything Muppet: What do you mean?
Harvey Kneeslapper: Well, up is the opposite of down!
Black-Haired Fat Blue Anything Muppet: So?
Harvey Kneeslapper: (Slaps the word 'up' on the AM's chest) That's up!!! A'HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!!!
(Leaves, laughing uncontrollably)
(Ending music plays, Fat Blue looks confused about the meaning of the word 'up'.)




Harvey Kneeslapper: (holding a box) A'ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Oh, 'scuze me, I have something very special for you, so do you want a surprise?
Black-Haired Fat Blue Anything Muppet: Say what?
Harvey Kneeslapper: I said that I have something very special for you, so do you want a surprise?
Black-Haired Fat Blue Anything Muppet: No, but I'll check out.
Harvey Kneeslapper: Alright. Here-(AM opens the box, lots of white paint squirts at him) A'ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Now, that's your surprise! (Pause. Puts more white paint on the AM's head.) A'HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!!! (Laughs really, REALLY hard.)
Black-Haired Fat Blue Anything Muppet: (Screaming) AAAUUUUUUGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! (Ending music plays, chases Harvey after.)

What do you think?

 

[ssetta]

I think those are great!

 

[mikealan]

Here are a couple I know...

Harvey Kneeslapper: (holding a DVD disc as Herbert Birdsfoot passes by) A'ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! (To Herbert Birdsfoot) Oh! Hi'ya friend, would you like a DVD?

Herbert Birdsfoot: Say what?

Harvey Kneeslapper: A'ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Like I said if you would like a DVD.

Herbert Birdsfoot: Yeah, sure, I definately want a DVD.

Harvey Kneeslapper: Alright, here's your new DVD! (Slaps the word DVD on Herbert's chest) A'HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!!!! (Laughs really hard as ending music plays)




Harvey Kneeslapper: (Holding a CD disc) A'ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Oh, hi'ya Mr. Blue-Head! Would you like a CD?

Fat Blue AM: Say what?

Harvey Kneeslapper: A'ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Like I said if you would like a CD. Hee hee hee (Chuckles).

Fat Blue AM: Yeah, sure, I'd love getting a CD.

Harvey Kneeslapper: Alright, and here's your brand-new CD! (Slaps the word CD on AM's chest) A'HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!!! (Laughs really hard as ending music plays)

Fat Blue AM: AAAAUUUUUGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! (Chases Harvey after angrily)