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The Third Somewhat-Annual Muppet Central Award Ceremony!!

Discussion in 'Friends and Family' started by theprawncracker, Sep 22, 2006.

  1. theprawncracker Well-Known Member

    Announcer: Good evening ladies, gentlemen, unisex penguins, and random forms of muffins. Welcome to the third hopefully-soon-to-be-annual Muppet Central Awards! Now from the East coast to the West, the Northern hemisphere to the Southern, they’ve gathered from all around, converging in the Muppet Central banquet hall. Since 1998, Phillip Chapman has been entertaining fans of Jim Henson’s Muppet creations from around the world! And now, they’ve all gathered to pay respect (those who can afford it), lose self-respect, and gain respect themselves! And now, here is your host, Ryan "Prawnie" theprawncracker!

    *the curtains draw open as walk to the center of the stage and approach a podium*

    Hello, hi there, hola, what’s up, how ya doin, hi-ho, hiya hiya hiya, and all the other forms of saying hello to you all! And like the announcer said, welcome to the show! We’ve got all sorts of awards for all sorts of people!
    *cut to balcony*

    Statler: Ha! All sorts of people is right! We don’t even know who they are or where they came from!

    Waldorf: You old fool! Weren’t you listening to the announcer? Or did you forget your hearing aid again?

    Statler: What?

    Waldorf: Oy...

    *cut back to stage*

    Hey, watch it Waldorf, that’s Lisa’s word. Anyway, what would an amazing award show like our own be without an opening number?

    Statler: I know what it would be!

    Waldorf: Yeah! A good award show!

    Both: Do ho ho ho!

    Anyway...We couldn’t find any actual performers to play our opening number, but we did find the Muppets, so, we had to settle. Besides, it was part of the deal when we returned them back to the Henson warehouse. So, without further to do, or say, here they are, the Muppets!

    *I move off the stage as Fozzie and Rizzo move on*

    Fozzie and Rizzo: Another opening, another show
    In Philly, Boston or Baltimo’
    A chance for stage hands to say:

    Beauregard(Muppet): Hello!

    Fozzie and Rizzo: Another opening of another show!

    *Camilla and three other chickens waddle onto the stage*

    Camilla: *clucking to the tune of "Baby Face"* Byock buck byawk

    Other Chickens: Buck buck buck buck buck buck buck

    Camilla: Byock buck byawk

    Other chickens: Buck buck buck buck buck buck buck

    Camilla: Byock buck byawk
    Brawk buck baw
    Byock buck buck buck buck
    Bagawk! Ba bawk bawk bawk bawk!

    *Sweetums and Thog roll out Rowlf on his piano*

    Rowlf: Cottleston cottleston cottleston pie
    Why does a chicken?
    I don’t know why
    Ask me a riddle and I reply:
    Cottleston cottleston cottleston pie.

    *Cookie Monster and all of the Sesame Street monsters head on stage*

    Cookie Monster: Pie? Me no want pie! Me want cookies!
    C is for cookie, that’s good enough for me
    C is for cookie, that’s good enough for me
    C is for cookie, that’s good enough for me

    Cookie and the Monsters: Oh, cookie cookie cookie starts with C!

    *The Fraggles appear out of a hole in the back wall*

    Fraggles: We are the children of tomorrow
    Each one is different and the same
    Help us to live here with our other
    Our brother, one in heart, one in hope, one in vain.

    *Gonzo is fired out on stage and lands on his feet*

    Gonzo: Oh, there’s not a word yet,
    For old friends who’ve just met
    Part heaven, part space
    Or have I found my place?
    You can just visit
    But I plan to stay
    I’m going to go back there someday.

    *Ernie, Bert, Oscar and Grover come on stage*

    Ernie: La de da de dum,
    La de da de dum
    What’s the name of that song?

    Bert: La de da de dum
    La de da de dum
    What’s the name of that song?

    Grover: It goes la de da de dum
    La de da de dum
    Something, something birds.

    Oscar: La de da de dum,
    La de da de,

    *Kermit and Miss Piggy lead the rest of the Muppets on stage all of them in tuxedos, including the penguins, who really don’t need them but felt it right to blend in*

    Kermit: Okay, time for the big finale! Is everybody ready?

    Everybody: Yeah!

    Kermit: One, two, three, four, can I have a little more?
    Five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, I love you!

    Miss Piggy: Oh Kermie,
    A, B, C, D, can I bring my friend to tea?
    F, G, H, I, J, Kerm, I love you!

    Fozzie: Bum bum bum bum bum bum bum!
    Sail the ship!

    Animal: Bum bum bum!
    Chop the tree!

    Gonzo: Bum bum bum!
    Skip the rope!

    Rizzo: Bum bum bum!
    Look at me!

    Kermit: Everybody ready? Okay!
    All together now!

    Muppets: All together now!

    Kermit: All together now!

    Sesame Street: All together now!

    Kermit: All together now!

    Fraggles: All together now!

    Kermit: All together now!

    Audience: All together now!

    Kermit: Black, white, green, red,

    Robin: Do I have to go to bed?

    Kermit: Pink, brown, yellow orange and blue,
    I love you!

    Robin:Aw, Uncle Kermit.

    Big Bird: A, B, C, D,
    Can I bring my friend to tea?

    Grover: E, F, G, H, I, J,
    I love you!

    Kermit: All together now!

    Muppets: All together now!

    Kermit: All together now!

    Sesame Street: All together now!

    Kermit: All together now!

    Fraggles: All together now!

    Kermit: All together now!

    Audience: All together now!

    Gobo: Bum bum bum bum bum bum
    Sail the ship!

    Red: Bum bum bum!
    Chop the tree!

    Boober: Bum bum bum!
    Skip the rope!

    Pepe: Bum bum bum,
    Look at me!

    Kermit: All together now!

    Kermit: All together now!

    Sesame Street: All together now!

    Kermit: All together now!

    Muppets: All together now!

    Kermit: All together now!

    Fraggles: All together now!

    Kermit: All together now!

    Audience: All together now!

    Kermit: All together now!

    All: All together now!!

    Kermit: Thank you thank you! And now, I’m supposed to present the first award. Um, it’s called, "Animal on Caffeine." *gulps* That’s a scary concept.

    Animal: Coffee! Coffee! Ha ha ha!

    Kermit: Sheesh, anyway, the award for the most prominent poster goes to Beauregard! Yaaaaay!!

    Beauregard(Muppet): Oh gee, I never knew I was so loved. Or that my posters were enjoyed so much.

    Kermit: *scrunches up face* Good grief...Here’s your award Beauregard...
  2. BEAR Active Member

    Bry: (in audience applauding) Yay!! What a great opening number!
  3. D'Snowth Well-Known Member

    Kimp the Shrimp killed all the fun of this award show.
  4. redBoobergurl Well-Known Member

    Hey Bryan! Can Kim and I sit with you? That was a great opening number!
  5. Leyla Member

    <Leyla is surrounded by her dorm roomies and making a lot of noise. On her right is Robot Kermit, still deactivated and on her left are Wanda, Hilda and Farmer Jim, who is pulling uncomfortably at his bow tie.>

    Leyla: Hooray!!! Way to go Beau! And wasn't that a nice presentation? And the muppets all look so good! <to Jimmy> Stop fidgeting, will ya!

    Jimmy: I hate this tie! Can I please...

    Hilda: Oh, don't be such a cry baby. Now let's all cheer for Beau!

    Leyla: Well said!

    All: Great job, Beau! YAY!!!
  6. Kimp the Shrimp Active Member

    Thog: should i diispose of him boss

    KTS: nah his bark is worse then his bite

    Ernie: just give me one shot boss

    KTS: all in good time, i have something great planned for after the shw at the Awards party
    it will be a great "outing"
  7. BEAR Active Member

    Hi, Beth. Hey, Kim. Of course you can sit here. You can sit right here next to me. This was supposed to be Big Bird's seat, but the people behind us were complaining that they couldn't see. So, he took Telly and went to sit towards the back.
  8. BEAR Active Member

    Hey, Snowthy. Come on! Let's just have a good awards show. He hasn't done anything here yet, so let's just try to have fun. Okay! We don't want to start any fights in this thread. Have a muffin! (tosses a fresh muffin to Snowth)
  9. Kimp the Shrimp Active Member

    Bear don't worry about me i'm just chillin here no problems

    Gives Bear a Man Hug

    Hugs out grover and Cookie Monster the Gang is starting to get together
  10. D'Snowth Well-Known Member

    So Beauregard's the only one who won an award?
  11. anythingmuppet New Member

    Cool award, congrats Beau
  12. Kimp the Shrimp Active Member

    Cool Award Congrats Beau
  13. anythingmuppet New Member

    Thats what I said lol

    Crazy kimp :p
  14. BEAR Active Member

    So far...

    Yay Beau!
  15. theprawncracker Well-Known Member

    Welcome back to the show everyone! And wasn't that a great opening number?

    Statler: Well, it was a number.
    Waldorf: And it opened the show.
    Statler: But it sure wasn't great!
    Both: Do ho ho ho!

    ...Anyhoo, here to present the next awards we have Big Bird and Bear from Sesame Street and Bear in the Big Blue House! Yay!

    *Big Bird comes to the podium in his bow tie and Bear in a tuxedo top*

    Big Bird: Hi there! Don't worry everybody, there'll just be a little bit more of this boring stuff, then we all get cake! Anyway, we're here to present the awards for Sesame Street-
    Bear: And Bear in the Big Blue House!
    Big Bird: Yup! Now, can you tell me who to give this award to?
    Bear: You bet Bird! The winner of both awards is BEAR! Also known as Bryan! Way to go!
    Big Bird: Yay Bryan!
  16. Kimp the Shrimp Active Member

    Yeah Double awards for Bear you go Dawg

    i'm leaving for like 2 hrs bye
  17. anythingmuppet New Member

    Why Kimp?

    By the way, congratz Bryan, buddy!
  18. TogetherAgain Well-Known Member

    Ooh, such cool awards! Oh, my applause for everyone!!! <Squeaks.> (My squeaks are the closest to cheers I can get sometimes... I apologize to your ear drums.)
  19. anythingmuppet New Member

    *eardrums shatter*

    Ah, thanks alot! :rolleyes: Now I have to go buy new ones....AGAIN!!

    *walks out of thread and into hardware store*
  20. theprawncracker Well-Known Member

    *Big Bird and Bear leave the stage*

    Me: *clapping* It's always great to hear from the two tallest Muppets isn't it? Moving on, we have Robin and Prairie Dawn presenting the award for short people!

    *Robin and Prairie Dawn walk out to the podium*

    Prairie: Ryan, it's not for short people! It's for short post counts!
    Robin: Yeah! I mean, we don't wanna be stereotypical do we?
    Prairie: That's a big word from a five year old.
    Robin: We're dealing with little things remember!
    Prairie: Oh yeah, right. Anyway, the winner of the "Short But Sweet Award" goes to, my very good friend Katzi428! Yay Kathy!
    Robin: *waves arms like Kermit* Yaaaaaay!!
    Prairie: Like uncle like nephew I suppose. Te he he he he.

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