Flippersteps in the Sand

[Leyla]

I thought the magic word was Robin...

 

[Java]

Oh, I'm mixing up my magic words again...

________ insert proper magic word here and I'll say it Queen of Muppety Fan Fiction Goodness and Grief

(I've been here too long, I'm starting not to make sense and yes, I'm aware it's more profitable to make dollars )

 

[TogetherAgain]

<Inserts the magic word: Now!>

 

[Java]

Now! Now! Now!

 

[TogetherAgain]

Chapter Thirty-Four

The Next Day
July 1, 1975

“I thought I didn’t have to worry about it,” Kermit said as they walked.

Bernie held his hands out apologetically. “It’s not much to worry,” he said. “You just have to keep saying no until-“ He stopped himself.

Kermit looked at him. “Until what?”

“Um- until nothing,” Bernie said. “Just keep saying no.”

“Easy enough,” Kermit said. He remembered the feel of gunmetal on his back and frowned. Just how easy was easy enough?

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~​

The stuffy meeting room was getting stuffier. Bernie Brillstein shifted in his seat and set about spinning a new series of arguments in his mind. He shot a glance at Kermit.

The frog held a strong, blazing gaze across the table. His face was so still and steady that one might have wondered if he had turned to stone.

He hadn’t, of course.

Though for the potency of his glare, the man he was looking at probably should have.

The man he was looking at was Doc Hopper, who looked about angry enough to explode.

They were engaged in a cutthroat staring contest. It had started when Hopper had realized that no matter what clever threat he vocalized against the frog’s life, career, and reputation, he was not going to get what he wanted. He was now contemplating how to threaten his family.

At his side, his green-hatted assistant, apparently named Max, was taking advantage of the prolonged silence to catch up with his furious scribbling of every spoken word. When he finally caught up, he looked over his records at every threat, each one met with a peaceful rebuttal. Something about it didn’t add up.

A pound on the door broke the silence. “MR. HOPPER?” a deep voice demanded.

“WHAT IS IT?” Doc Hopper bellowed.

“POLICE! OPEN UP!”

Hopper stiffened. Max looked up. Kermit sat a little straighter. Bernie cracked a faint smile.

“Max,” Doc Hopper said, “Go open the door.”

Max gulped, dropped his pen and notebook, and nervously scuttled to open the door.

Two uniformed officers marched in. “Doc Hopper?” one of them asked.

Doc Hopper stood up. “What can I do for you, officers?” he asked with a courteous smile.

The first one clamped handcuffs onto him. “You’re under arrest for harassment. Anything you say, can and will be used against you in a court of law.”

“Now hold on just a minute!” Hopper cried. “What proof have you got?”

“Proof of harassment?” Bernie said incredulously. “What about all the death threats you’ve made?”

“DEATH THREATS?” Hopper acted stunned.

Kermit stood up. “You’ve threatened my life ten times in this meeting alone,” he said.

“You can’t prove that!” Hopper said. “Officer, that’s their word against ours, it can’t be proved, it’s two against two!”

“It’s three against one,” Max corrected. He had retrieved his notebook from the table and began showing it to the second officer. “Here’s all of the past few months-“

“MAX!” Hopper screamed.

Max looked him straight in the eyes and spoke firmly. “I’m sorry, doc.” He clearly was not sorry at all.

“See Kermit?” Bernie said. “I told you that you didn’t have to worry.”

“I’ll try not to doubt you again,” Kermit said. “But you could have told me the police were coming.”

“But then you’d think about that instead of saying no,” Bernie said.

“A method to the madness, huh?” Kermit said. “I’ll keep that in mind.”

“Just trust me, Kermit,” Bernie said. “Ninety five point six percent of the time, my best interest is your best interest.”

“What about the other four point four percent?” Kermit asked.

“Hardly worth mentioning.”

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~​

Two Days Later
July 3, 1975

“Hey Fozzie,” Gonzo said as they watched the extra car drive away from the gas station, “Who do you think will be in charge of us while Kermit’s in the swamp?”

“I don’t know,” Fozzie said. “What do you think?”

“Probably Jim,” Gonzo said.

“But he’s with Kermit now,” Fozzie said. “Who’s in charge until he gets back?”

“Whoever’s in the driver’s seat,” Gonzo said.

“Well how do we decide who drives?” Fozzie asked.

Gonzo thought about it. “I don’t know.”

Fozzie sighed. “Let’s just leave it up to the humans.”

Gonzo got an idea. “Hey, I know,” he said, “I could be in charge!”

Fozzie hesitated. “Let’s just leave it up to the humans.”

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~​

“HI-HO EVERYONE!”

“UNCLE KERMIT!”

They swarmed out of nowhere.

“Uncle Kermit Uncle Kermit!”

“Did you go to Hollywood?”

“Uncle Kermit what’s Hollywood?”

“Are you gonna be famous?”

“Mr. Henson’s here too!”

“Hi Mr. Henson!”

“Rowlf!”

“Who’s Rowlf?”

“That’s Rowlf!”

“Uncle Kermit!”

“Uncle Kermit!”

“Uncle Kermit!”

Kermit, Jim, and Rowlf laughed as they were bombarded with young frogs and questions. Somehow they made their way into the swamp.

“Uncle Kermit, can I come with you this time?” Robin asked, perched on Kermit’s back.

“Well I don’t know, Robin, we’re going to be pretty busy for a while,” Kermit said.

“I could help!” Robin said.

“MIT!” Maggie ran over, stopped and stared. “Holy Mosquitoes- it’s all three musketeers!” She threw her arms around Rowlf. “We haven’t seen you in ages, Bud!”

“Rowlf,” the dog corrected.

“Bud,” Maggie insisted.

Kermit chuckled. “For a second there, I thought you said Bug.”

“Oh that’s funnier!” Maggie turned to Rowlf again. “Maybe I’ll call you Bug.”

“I’m not a bug, I’m a dog,” Rowlf said.

“Yeah, but you’ve got bugs,” Maggie said as she picked a flea off of his back.

“Maggie!” Kermit scrunched up his face.

“Boys!” a cheerful voice rang out.

Kermit turned to greet its owner. “Hi Mom!”

The lady frog gave each of them a hug. “It’s wonderful to see you all again,” she said in her forever gentle voice.

“Great to see you too Mom,” Kermit said.

“Our pleasure as always, Mrs. the Frog,” Rowlf said.

“How are you doing, Mrs. the Frog?” Jim asked.

“Oh I’m fine, fine,” she said. She called over her shoulder. “James, come see your son!”

“I’m right here, dear,” James the Frog said. He was standing at her side.

She looked at him. “Oh,” she said. “You are.”

“Hi Dad,” Kermit said.

“How was Hollywood?” James asked. “Why are you back?”

“Well see-“

“We went there-“

“Auditions were crazy-“

“I got two days off-“

“And there’s this agent guy-“

“We made it-“

“Lord Lew Grade-“

“Bernie Brillstein-“

“Hopper got arrested-“

“Gonna have a show-“

“Some old theater-“

“On the way there-“

“We stopped by-“

“The rest are still going-“

“We’re just saying hi-“

“I’ll stay for Independence Day-“

“And that’s pretty much it!”

James looked at his wife. “Did you get any of that, Jane?”

“About half,” she said. She smiled. “It’s good to see you, boys. Now don’t get too comfortable because dinner’s almost ready and we all know you’ll all run and tackle each other for it…” She walked off to finish making dinner.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~​

The Next Day
July 4, 1975

Kermit, Croaker, and Goggles sat on Kermit’s favorite log as dusk began to settle.

“It was nice to see Rowlf and Jim yesterday,” Croaker said.

“Mm-hm.” Kermit kept his eyes towards the sky.

“Yeah,” Goggles said. “And it’s nice that you got to be here for the Fourth, Kermit.”

“Well that was the plan originally,” Kermit said. “I mean, before Bernie came to the swamp and all.”

“You’ll still come and visit us, right?” Goggles asked.

“Of course,” Kermit said. He gave Croaker a teasing glance. “I’ve gotta keep an eye on Maggie.”

“You’re not doing a good job of it,” Croaker said. He nodded towards the group of male frogs all vying for Maggie’s attention at the edge of the pond.

Kermit scrunched up his face. “Sheesh,” he said, “Typical.”

Croaker grinned. “Yeah,” he said, “But watch this.” He hopped across the lily pads towards Maggie.

Kermit shook his head. “One of these days I’ve got to have a talk with Maggie,” he said.

“About what?” Goggles asked.

Kermit shook his head, and then watched as Croaker reached Maggie’s clump. Within moments of his arrival, his hand was on her back, and the other frogs were starting to leave. Kermit scrunched up his face. “Sheesh.”

“How does he do that?” Goggles wondered in awe.

Kermit looked at Goggles, then at Croaker, and then back at Goggles. “Why don’t you go ask him?” he said mischievously.

“Right now?” Goggles asked.

“Sure!” Kermit said. He smiled as Goggles hopped off, and then sat back and watched, waiting for his friend’s question to make his sister squirm.

“Uncle Kermit?” a small voice said.

Kermit turned to see Robin treading water just behind the log. “Hi Robin,” he said, and he gestured for his nephew to join him.

Robin splashed onto the log and sat next to his uncle. “Uncle Kermit,” he said, “What was Hollywood like?”

“Hm. Well, it was full of people,” Kermit said. “Everything was fancy and flashy and exciting, and it always felt like something big was about to happen.”

“Are you gonna live there now?” Robin asked.

“Nope,” Kermit said. “I might visit there sometimes, but I’ll still live in my house.”

“Can I come with you?” Robin asked.

“You mean to Hollywood?” Kermit asked. Robin nodded. “Well, we’ll see. Maybe some time.”

Robin leaned against his uncle’s side.

“Aw, you’re all wet still!” Kermit teased as he put his arm around the small frog.

They heard a loud pop above them and looked up as the first fireworks lit the sky for Independence Day.

 

[redBoobergurl]

Yea update!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I love how the police barged in and arrested Doc Hopper! It's nice that you strayed away from TMM plotline for resolving that issue. It helps when Kermit tells Robin "well, this is more or less how the Muppets got together"

Then Kermit, Jim and Rowlf in the swamp! So great! Maggie and Rowlf were funny. The bug stuff cracked me up!

Robin! He's so cute and he wants to go to Hollywood and it's just so cute!

Loving it, can't wait to read more!

 

[Java]

Of course the Doc Hopper scene had to be different. And by Hollywoods standards it was boring so they had to replace it with the wild west scene. It's all becoming logical (oops, almost said making sense and we know you work with dollars).


And then there was the converstation in the swamp that only a mother could follow along and understand even half of. So typical of my family too.

I'll have to remember that Rowlf is Bug. Check, burned into brain.

And there's Robin longing to go back with him.

They're well on their way to the show, can't wait for more! Hopefully soonish since this is a long weekend?

 

[The Count]

Yeah... But long weekends are when teachers give you gads of homework.

Loved it Lisa, too many quotes to go through, will come back later after I've read the other stories.

 

[Fragglemuppet]

Ah Ed, I see you are fully engrosed in the schoolyear already. Lucky me, don't have to deal with that for anothe semester.
I have a question Lisa. When you get to 1979, will you explain where the differences in TMM came from, and why they were made? I'm also confused about the Doc Hopper scene... Certain things I can understand, EX. Clifford being in the church originally, but not in the movie. He might have decided he didn't want to work on it, but this scene is just so different. I wonder why?
Great chapter; can't wait for more.

 

[Leyla]

<dances> Whooooo!! Toga! <does the Toga dance> <It is a little strange> <but so is she, so no matter.> You have made me love Bernie.

Chapter Thirty-Four

“I thought I didn’t have to worry about it,” Kermit said as they walked.

Ooh, nice beginning of a chapter... instant anxiety.

Bernie held his hands out apologetically. “It’s not much to worry,” he said. “You just have to keep saying no until-“ He stopped himself.

Kermit looked at him. “Until what?”

“Um- until nothing,” Bernie said. “Just keep saying no.”

As you know, I read these through before I review them. (And despite the fact they are usually hysterically, maddenly positive, I actually do try to put a little thought into them. So, already I'm resisting the urge to hug Bernie. I enjoy lines that are cut off... especially when you discover what they were going to say later.

“Easy enough,” Kermit said. He remembered the feel of gunmetal on his back and frowned. Just how easy was easy enough?

<shivers> Wow... <worries> Wait... I read this! I know I am worrying for naught! And yet, I cannot resist. <worries> Kermit and gunmetal on his back... that's so wrong. Piggy, come keep an eye on your frog!

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~​

The stuffy meeting room was getting stuffier.

YAY! I have a taste for lines like these, don't ask me why, so yay!!

The frog held a strong, blazing gaze across the table. His face was so still and steady that one might have wondered if he had turned to stone.

He hadn’t, of course.

Though for the potency of his glare, the man he was looking at probably should have.

<swoons for Kermit> Oooh, lovely lovely lovely. I love him when he gets all determined like that. Beautifully written too, Lisa.

The man he was looking at was Doc Hopper, who looked about angry enough to explode.

They were engaged in a cutthroat staring contest. It had started when Hopper had realized that no matter what clever threat he vocalized against the frog’s life, career, and reputation, he was not going to get what he wanted. He was now contemplating how to threaten his family.

<shudder> <chills> Wow... you know, I often gush so much about content I neglect telling you how much I enjoy the delivery system. Your prose elegant, witty, engrossing and charming. It suits perfectly whatever mood you're trying to convey and certain snatches of dialogue, or phrases stick with me for a very longtime. You get me right in the heart. <Ba-dump, ba-dump> See?

At his side, his green-hatted assistant, apparently named Max, was taking advantage of the prolonged silence to catch up with his furious scribbling of every spoken word. When he finally caught up, he looked over his records at every threat, each one met with a peaceful rebuttal.

<heart lurches> A peaceful rebuttel... wow.. isn't that just so Kermity... just as Kermity as waving his arms around in a panic. You know... when I think about it... Kermit tends to freak out at his friends, or when they're around... he seemed to stay much calmer... quieter, sometimes almost withdrawn, when the stakes are really high. I'm sure someone can find a peaceful rebuttal for that thought... but I'm too tired to really try to back it up.

“WHAT IS IT?” Doc Hopper bellowed.

“POLICE! OPEN UP!”

Hopper stiffened. Max looked up. Kermit sat a little straighter. Bernie cracked a faint smile.

<hugs Bernie> Yay! Although, at this point poor Kermit is probably wondering if they're there for him!

“Now hold on just a minute!” Hopper cried. “What proof have you got?”

“Proof of harassment?” Bernie said incredulously. “What about all the death threats you’ve made?”

Oh, I am in the middle of such a Bernie love fest right now!

“DEATH THREATS?” Hopper acted stunned.

Kermit stood up. “You’ve threatened my life ten times in this meeting alone,” he said.

What I am about to say, I say in all sincerity, so you better believe it: Reading this scene, I get the exact SAME thrill I get at the ending of the Muppet movie, when Kermit stands up to Hopper and Animal chases him away. There's your peaceful rebuttal... and there's your powerful outside force to the rescue. The SAME, incredible feeling. Wow... wow, Lisa.
<cheers for Max's decision> See! It's there!

“But then you’d think about that instead of saying no,” Bernie said.

“A method to the madness, huh?” Kermit said. “I’ll keep that in mind.”

<loves Bernie still more!> And it's very telling... wow, what an agent. Kermit has to stand up to Hopper... believing that it's only his determination he can depend on... not someone else to rescue hhim... It's like he's training Kermit up. This is a special, special agent, Kermit has.

“Just trust me, Kermit,” Bernie said. “Ninety five point six percent of the time, my best interest is your best interest.”

“What about the other four point four percent?” Kermit asked.

“Hardly worth mentioning.”

<giggles> And yet, still an agent! I'm wondering if you have somehting specific in mind here. If you do, I have no clue what it is.

“Hey Fozzie,” Gonzo said as they watched the extra car drive away from the gas station, “Who do you think will be in charge of us while Kermit’s in the swamp?”

Yay! Kermit's going home to the swamp! <dances> I loved this conversation. It's funny and sweet, and well, it connects to quite a few episodes and fanfics floating around out there doesn't it. what happens when the frogs away.

Gonzo got an idea. “Hey, I know,” he said, “I could be in charge!”

Fozzie hesitated. “Let’s just leave it up to the humans.”

<laughs> Wonderful!

Okay, I'm half asleep right now, so I'll drop the quoting so I can use my remaining brain cells for coherency. Yay! Loved the swamp scene, loved the family that you created, love, love, love, that it's Kermit, Jim and Rowlf, that special trio who go visiting, sigh... great choice there, Lisa.

I love the way Kermit is greeted with all these frogs everytime he comes home... It's so incredibly sweet. I can picture them bouncing all over the place with shining eyes and eager questions.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~​

“Of course,” Kermit said. He gave Croaker a teasing glance. “I’ve gotta keep an eye on Maggie.”

“You’re not doing a good job of it,” Croaker said. He nodded towards the group of male frogs all vying for Maggie’s attention at the edge of the pond.

Kermit scrunched up his face. “Sheesh,” he said, “Typical.”

<giggles> Yay!! I love these characters. They're as real to me as Kermit is actually... which says an awful lot about your writing skill Lisa, and they way you've developed them.

Kermit shook his head, and then watched as Croaker reached Maggie’s clump. Within moments of his arrival, his hand was on her back, and the other frogs were starting to leave. Kermit scrunched up his face. “Sheesh.”

“How does he do that?” Goggles wondered in awe.

Kermit looked at Goggles, then at Croaker, and then back at Goggles. “Why don’t you go ask him?” he said mischievously.

<giggles> Kermit, you clever fiend! (I've probably called Lisa that, come to think of it.)

“Hm. Well, it was full of people,” Kermit said. “Everything was fancy and flashy and exciting, and it always felt like something big was about to happen.”

Love that line!

“Can I come with you?” Robin asked.

“You mean to Hollywood?” Kermit asked. Robin nodded. “Well, we’ll see. Maybe some time.”

Robin leaned against his uncle’s side.

<loves Robin>

“Aw, you’re all wet still!” Kermit teased as he put his arm around the small frog.

Somehow... I know that Kermit doesn't mind at all.

Wonderful, heartwarming chapter Lisa. Everything I've come to expect from your writing!

Hugs,
Leyla