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Dealing with depression and anxiety

Discussion in 'Friends and Family' started by charlietheowl, Dec 30, 2011.

  1. heralde

    heralde Well-Known Member

    I can't describe just how hopeless and miserable I am right now. I'm afraid I won't have the courage to get someone out of my life that really is just adding nothing but misery. Not sure anything could lift me up from this mood right now and it's pretty unsettling to feel so helpless. I just don't know what's wrong with me. :cry:
  2. Gonzo's Hobbit

    Gonzo's Hobbit Well-Known Member

    Oh I'm sorry heralde *hugs* As much as you don't like certain people it can be hard to tell them. Not surprised you're feeling that way.
    Is there a way to get across that they're making your life miserable? Then maybe they can change and not leave?
  3. heralde

    heralde Well-Known Member

    Thanks for the support. :)

    Oh believe me this goes back a very long time, lol. Don't think that's going to happen. I actually managed to separate for a few years but recently made the mistake of reconnecting. I thought things could be better, but same old nonsense.It's hard to let go of an old friend.

    But looking back, it was hard to move on the first time too, but one day I just knew when it was right. And that moment will probably come again. Just need time to get my thoughts together. ::sigh::
  4. charlietheowl

    charlietheowl Well-Known Member

    I'm sorry that you're dealing with this. Hopefully with time you can figure out what actions you need to take and what words to say that will help out your situation and allow you to feel better. We're here if you need us.
  5. heralde

    heralde Well-Known Member

    Thanks I appreciate it. :)
  6. RedPiggy

    RedPiggy Well-Known Member

    I have attachment issues. If a person stops helping me feel better, I tend to get rid of them (by not talking to them again). Once I have no use for someone, it's 80% over. Sometimes, if I'm feeling particularly generous, I'll give them a second chance (or whatever), but there are some people in this world who just shouldn't try to reconnect with me, because I just can't do it.
  7. newsmanfan

    newsmanfan Well-Known Member

    Heralde, don't wait for "the right day". Just tell them they're not a good friend to you and cut them off, period. Change phone numbers if you have to, block access on social networks, etc. Don't suffer abuse of any kind, especially a self-absorbed "friend" who only makes you feel miserable. This person sounds like a narcissist...and narcissists don't make friends; they're incapable of it. Best just to walk the other way. You certainly DON'T need that in your life, even if times are tough -- they'll only make it worse, and you need people around you to help you cope, not give you more stuff to cope with! :sympathy:

    heralde likes this.
  8. Sgt Floyd

    Sgt Floyd Well-Known Member

    Been feeling really depressed about school. This isn't about the typical fights I have with my mom which I have talked about. Its the feeling like I can't accomplish anything. My grades have slowly been dropping and I feel like why even bother trying to bring them up if its not going to matter in the long run. I got a 55 on my first chemistry test, which really shattered what little confidence I had left. I got my second chemistry test back today and it was an 82, but that still comes out to like a 60 something. English prbably in the the 80s somewhere, Music Appreciation is a 75, History is a 90 right now but we just had another test which I don't think I did good on, Astronomy...I don't even know and I really don't care. Probably in the 80s too. I feel like I'm just letting everyone down and sometimes I think I should just drop out and go work at mcdonalds. But both my years so far have been comepletely funded by grants which convert to loans so I'd have over 40K in loans to pay back. I feel hopeless and like whatever I decide is a lose lose situation.

    On top of that I have no friends. Yeah, i get along with my roommate, but as far as friends go my best friend is my stuffed elephant I brought to school. My parents keep saying I need a social life, but I think at my age people have pretty much established cliques and don't want any new friends. My parents are always creaming at me about being antisocial (which I should add is not the correct use of the word...heh...psychology XD), but it is so hard for me to make friends and keep them. Don't even get me started on the boyfriend matter. My mom keeps saying I should get one. Well, how exactly? I'm not someone who will walk up to a random dude and start flirting. Thats just weird. I don't know what it is about me that scares people off.

    I don't have anyone to talk to about anything. If told my mom how I was feeling she would blow a gasket. I told my grandmother a bit of how i was feeling, but she just HAD to go and tell my mom, which made her mad at me. Then my mom starts playing the guilt card saying how I'm a liar and she is my bigest cheerleader when EVERYTHING she has said to me has either been "you are wasteing your life," "you screwed up your life," or "then why don't you get a job and REALLY see how easy you had it." How is any of that supposed to build my confidence that was already hair thin? I just don't know anymore. Sometimes I feel like I should give up on life.
  9. heralde

    heralde Well-Known Member

    College is very difficult, I went through the same struggle. But it is possible to get things back up, I wouldn't throw in the towel yet. Have you tried talking to a counselor?

    Um, that might be true when you're 60 or something, lol. Trust me, you still have plenty of opportunities. Are there any groups you could get involved in?
  10. charlietheowl

    charlietheowl Well-Known Member

    I'm sorry you feel this way Sgt. Floyd, it's a terrible thing to have to deal with. I've found myself in a similar situation in terms of losing my confidence when it comes to schoolwork and social matters, and it tore me up earlier this school year. Your grades don't seem all that bad, and there's plenty of time left in the semester to work on them. I wouldn't drop out of school though, because you do have a future ahead of you and school is a great opportunity.

    As for friends, you have to put yourself first. It sucks to be lonely, but don't put yourself in any situations that'll make you feel uncomfortable or awkward. Perhaps you could do something with your roommate and one of her friends, something small. And don't worry about getting a boyfriend if you don't want one; again, it's your life and you should do what makes you feel comfortable.

    I know that this advice probably wasn't the most helpful, but if you want to talk more, you can message me. I'm very good at responding (unless I'm asleep). I hope you feel better soon.
    newsmanfan likes this.
  11. RedPiggy

    RedPiggy Well-Known Member

    Must ... remember ... vacation ... near ... must ... live with ... irritating ... bullcrap ... vacation ... less than a ... month away...

    Sorry. Work issues have me mega-stressed out at the moment. :p
  12. Gonzo's Hobbit

    Gonzo's Hobbit Well-Known Member

    Oh wow Sgt. Floyd, I'm sorry you're feeling this way. Heralde and Charlie are right though. (Sorry, I'm not sure what to add that hasn't been said yet) Thought I totally sympathize with you on the social thing. Don't feel pressured to make friends. I've kinda found that friends made under pressure don't really seem to be friends and don't last long. I myself didn't make many lasting friends in college. The ones I did make were because at one point we found (not forced) something to talk about and it moved on from there.

    I'll be praying that things work out for you.

    Woo hoo! (sarcasm) Gotta love work stress. What irriatating stuff's got you down?
  13. Sgt Floyd

    Sgt Floyd Well-Known Member

    There are counselors available, but I haven't talked to anyone. I feel weird telling people my problems face to face. And there are clubs and stuff, the challenge is finding ones that do no interfere with my service learning.

    No you're fine. I appreciate any input I get right now

    Thanks. And yes, I agree about the whole being pressured into making friends things. I'm not an assertive person either
  14. Teheheman

    Teheheman Well-Known Member

    The only thing I can say is Don't sweat the small stuff, you'll only get dehydrated. That probably doesn't help in this situation BUT, I CAN say that when you feel like you have no friends, just come on here and realize that people here really care for you. Heck, I'm such a friend to people in here, I'd even kill a guy for you. Maybe not for free, but at a discounted rate.............Ok, maybe not, but if you want somebody eliminated, I DO know a guy...........ok, maybe not, but at LEAST take the dang comfort in thinking that somebody would kill a guy/woman for you. If you're sad or depressed, do what I do. Listen to a CD that'll put you in a good mood right away. For me, it's a good rockin Country album, or something old school, or just anything that gets your mind off your troubles and puts a smile on your face. OR you can message me, and I'll tell you some bad jokes. Just for you, I'll even throw in a Wocka Wocka in there.

  15. Sgt Floyd

    Sgt Floyd Well-Known Member

    You did succeed in making me giggle :laugh:
  16. Teheheman

    Teheheman Well-Known Member

    I do what I can

  17. heralde

    heralde Well-Known Member

    I understand. You have to look at it from a practical standpoint. You're not talking about "your problems." You're just asking for advice on raising your GPA so you can complete your education in a successful and expedited fashion. ;)
  18. RedPiggy

    RedPiggy Well-Known Member

    After being sent home today because some construction made me have 2 asthma attacks in an hour and a tremendous anxiety attack, I had to go to the doctor. Now I'm gonna try Celexa (anti-depressant). Wish me luck.
  19. charlietheowl

    charlietheowl Well-Known Member

    Hope it works out for you.
  20. Gonzo's Hobbit

    Gonzo's Hobbit Well-Known Member

    Aww man, trust an asthma attack to ruin a day. Hope you feel better Piggy

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