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The 100 Greatest Muppets! By Lisa and Prawnie!

Discussion in 'Classic Muppets' started by theprawncracker, Jul 25, 2007.

  1. The Count

    The Count Moderator Staff Member

    Hmmm... Junior Gorg, Janice, Boober, Scooter... You guys are gonna make a lot of people over at the RHLC happy with this tensome not to mention a certain cousin of ours known simply as Scooter's sweetheart. Great to have one more update from you crazy kids... Now come on, there's only two segments left to get this finished!

    BTW: Snuffy's mom calls him "Aloysius".
  2. Muppet Newsgirl

    Muppet Newsgirl Well-Known Member

    Oh, very happy, indeed. I was wondering where Scooter would show up in the lineup.

    And it's a very comprehensive list you've got there. I mean, of Richard's characters, you've run the gamut from the big and shaggy (Sweetums and Junior Gorg...and one-half of Snuffy, if you want to be technical) to the somewhat more petite (Scooter, Janice, Beaker).

    Yes, Adam Hunt did play his brother's alter ego in MFS (after all, Richard and Adam grew up together and had the same mitochondrial DNA, so one should have known the other's voice and speech patterns), and he was also one of the background puppeteers in TMM.
  3. Java

    Java Well-Known Member

    I really enjoyed this guys. Can't wait to see who's in the top 20!
  4. BeakerSqueedom

    BeakerSqueedom Well-Known Member

    Seeing Scooter made me smile.
    I am loving this list sooo much!

    I was even more pleased to see Bunsen!
    :p I was waitin' for da' melon man!
    I tried not to squeal!
    Yes, Ryan, you make an EXCELLENT impression of him.

    Continue when you can.

    I enjoy this more and more!
  5. TogetherAgain

    TogetherAgain Well-Known Member

    Okay... In time for the holiday season, here's the Top Twenty!

    20. Penguins (The Muppet Show and the Muppet movies)

    L - Ah, yes, the penguins. Source of so much comedy here at MC.
    P - And in the Muppet movies. "Well ex-CUSE us for living!"
    L - Yup! And, since it is the season, I feel the need to mention the Penguins' Christmas Skating Party in Muppet Christmas Carol.
    P - Haha, have you been to ToughPigs lately?
    L - Haven't been there in ages. Why?
    P - Their most recent bulletin thing is called "22 Things to do During 'When Love Is Gone.'" Or something like that. Anyway, one of the things to do during the song is read the original "Christmas Carol" novel until you can find the part where Bob Cratchit ice-skates with penguins.
    L - HA! He does actually ice-skate, sort of, but not with penguins. I don't think they learned to talk and wear scarves until the twentieth century.
    P - Wait, it wasn't their most recent... they've added like three since I last looked. And it's 27 things.
    L - Oh, very good. Now back to the penguins.
    P - Quack.
    L - Quite.
    P - Have you ever wondered why they quack?
    L - Nope. Have you ever wondered why they flip each other into the air?
    P - Nah, they're penguins.
    L - Yeah, I guess. But wasn't there one in an episode of The Muppet Show that claimed to be a flamingo wearing a tuxedo?
    P - I don't know. I've only seen seasons 1 and 2.
    P - *pokes Disney with a cattle prod*
    L - Moooooooo... I mean, um- MWoO... Which reminds me! Muppets Wizard of Oz. "Ladies and gentlemen- and unisex penguins..."
    P - Hahaha, oh yes, one of the best lines of the film, and it went to Scooter of all people! But we already talked about him. ...How did penguins beat out Scooter?
    L - There's more of them. And they were picketing outside with the cue cards. And they have a cannon, in which they are the ammunition.
    P - Sorry, what'd you say? I just got shot by a penguin.
    L - I'll have to talk to Zany about that. Which reminds me; the penguins are so important that they have their very own smilie here at Muppet Central, and its name is Zany. Raise your hand if you remember voting on a name for the penguin! <Raises hand>
    P - *doesn't raise hand because he was running the voting therefore didn't vote*
    L - Oh, how politically correct of you.
    P - Thank you. I try. It's hard holding a position of power.
    L - It is, but you do it very well. On the other hand, I hold, um... Um... Anyway, about the penguins.
    P - Yes. I think we're pushing it with them, let's move on.
    L - QUACK!
    L - <applauds>

    19. Rizzo the Rat (The Muppet Show, Muppets Tonight! and the Muppet movies)

    P - He lives for da food.
    L - Yup. I used to be able to do a pretty good impression of him. I think it's been getting worse, though.
    P - Pity. Prolly 'cause yer eatin' all d'at peanut buttah. Clogs d'e old t'roat hole.
    L - ...That can't be it. I SURVIVED on peanut butter and french fries when my impression of him was pretty good.
    P - You survived on peanut buttah and french fries? ...Whatcha doin' next fridee night? Whadaya say we raid Wal-Mart of d'eir peanut buttah and d'en run ovah to McDonalds?
    L - Nah, McDonalds uses too much salt. But there's a burger joint by my house with some fanTASTic fries...
    P - Ya don't say... well d'en whad're we doin' heah?
    L - Da burger place is closed right now. Or if it isn't, it's overrun with a bar full of drunk smokers. Besides- we're reviewin' da rat! And what kinda SWA's would we be if we didn't mention right here right now dat Rizzo is a genuine bona-fide Steve original character!
    P - Well I dare say we'd be quite un-reputable ones.
    L - Quite! And we STILL need a Rizzo smilie.
    P - I recently saw that thread bumped and was very excited that the fervor was brought about again.
    L - I saw that too! And I dare say it's about time. Of course, it's about time we actually got the smilie, but the propaganda's been a little slow...
    P - Oh yeah. We just need new smilies hands down. Anyway, Rizzo. His chemistry with a certain hook-nosed weirdo is incredible.
    L - As discovered in Muppet Christmas Carol. I particularly enjoyed the bag of jelly beans.
    P - Oh my gosh yes. And when Rizzo kissed him on the nose. HAHA! Gosh, I love that entire movie SO much.
    L - Me too. I think I'll watch it tomorrow.
    P - Oh how funny, me too.
    L - Really? I had no idea. Must be a Half thing.
    P - Indeed. You know, I also really liked the rat in MFS.
    L - Oh, yeah. "So, this is the car that TAKES us to the limo, right?"
    P - "You oughta check out d'ose shocks!" "Trust me, I'm 'is roommate."
    L - Ah, yes, with the "How does he smell" line. And the whole thumb thing...
    P - The whole everything thing. And gosh, we're neglecting Rizzo in MTI! OH! And MTM!
    L - What is it? What is it?
    P - This just in! Phillip Chapman has said something incredibly... interesing in the Rizzo the Rat smiley thread!
    L - TELL!
    P - *ahem* And I quote, "Stay tuned for the beginning of the new year..." posted by Phillip Chapman Today, December 12, at 12:13 PM.
    L - Ooh, ooh, that sounds promising!
    P - I know!
    L - But back to the cold hard facts. Like Rizzo in Muppets Take Manhattan. "That's the closest I ever wanna be to a frog." Or in Muppet Treasure Island. "Oh I've gone WAY beyond afraid. Right now I'm somewhere between bed-wetting and a near-death experience!" And, how about a quote from the Muppet Treasure Island computer game? "Oh, this is bad, this is bad! Pirates, black spot, danger- and worst of all, THE REFRIDGERATOR'S EMPTY! Oh..."
    P - Food is always the most important thing?
    L - This IS Rizzo we're talking about. Remember the intro in Muppet Christmas Carol? "I am here to tell the story!" "And I am here for the food."
    P - "Hey, wait a minute, you're not Charles Dick-INS!
    L - "I am too!"
    P - And that's where my memory stops. Except for, "Okay, there's a scar on my thumb from when I fell off my bicycle--"
    L - Actually, it's a mole on his thumb. The scar's on his wrist. <Ahem> "No, no, don't tell us your HAND, tell us the STORY!"
    P - "The Marleys were dead to begin with."
    L - "Whoa- what?"
    P - "That's how the story begins, Rizzo! The Marleys were dead to Begin with!"
    L - "Oh..."
    P - We should probably stop now.
    L - Yeah, probably. Watch the movie, folks!
    P - Sha. Soon. Christmas is coming!
    L - Christmas is coming, the goose is getting fat... <ahem> Sorry, song cue. Now speaking of the rat and Christmas, wasn't his nose once a real bright spot?
    P - Oh yes. Rudolph the Red-Nosed Rat-Deer. If you wanna go for the obvious.
    L - Of course. And I seem to recall that he had a bit of fun in Muppet Wizard of Oz, defining the difference between rats and munchkins...
    P - Hehe, yes. The rat's everywhere. I think he even shared a trash can with Oscar once.
    L - Ooh... sounds like fun for one, and not for the other. He IS everywhere... But he's not suited for literature.
    P - Oh no, not at all. But he makes great non-character characters.
    L - Absolutely! And he's one heck of a side-kick, lemme tell ya!
    P - Mmhm. He was good in Muppet Classic Theater as well. He sings my favorite song from that one.
    L - Ooh, and what was that?
    P - "Nothing's Too Good For You." I'll send it to anyone who wants it! Just PM me with... oh, forget it, they know by now.
    L - They should, anyway. Have you gotten any PM's about it yet?
    P - Nope.
    L - Oh, for shame on our readers. But what else- OH! In the Muppet Treasure Island computer game, one of the chores that the player, as Hawkins, had on the Hispanola was to make an apple pie, and you just had to drag the apples into the pie, but Rizzo kept eating them- and commenting on what kind they were. "Mm, Pippin. ...What? That's an apple, TOO, ya know!"
    P - Hahaha! ...Gee, we've been talking about Rizzo for awhile.
    L - That happens. Should we move on, then?
    P - Probably, yes.
    L - Very well.

    18. Prairie Dawn (Sesame Street)

    L - Oh welcome, oh welcome, to our little play...
    P - Welcome, oh welcome, to our little countdown.
    P - Ha, mine's better.
    L - Mine's a more accurate quote.
    P - Yeah, well mine's better in context.
    L - Yeah, well I'm the right gender.
    L - And I can play piano. So there.
    P - But... but... I have an autographed PICTURE!
    L - ...Betcha I can do the voice better.
    P - Hark, what's that I hear? Could that be a challenge upon my voicely prestige?
    L - Only in regards to Prairie Dawn, primarily because I have years of experience of being a smart little girl.
    P - And you think I haven't?
    L - I'm pretty sure your experience has been a bit too masculine to be female. Unless there's something you're not telling me.
    P - Well fine, you've got me there. But I tried a Prairie voice in the car the other day. It wasn't bad.
    L - I tried one about two minutes ago, and it was fairly decent.
    P - Lovely.
    L - Now then, getting back to Prairie...
    P - I really, really like her.
    L - Me too. She is absolutely awesome. In fact, I will even go so far as to say that Prairie Dawn is fantasticabulous.
    P - I would go so far as to agree. I've never seen a Prairie sketch I didn't enjoy. Her chemistry with Cookie Monster is awesome.
    L - Sure is! She's got pretty good chemistry with just about everyone I've seen or heard her with, actually. Have you heard her sing with Grover? "Now here is a question, a question for you. Remember the answer will start with a Q! In stores you find milk in containers of sorts, but what do we call them? We call these things-" "Cows!"
    P - Haha, oh I love that song so much, but I hate to break it to you, it ain't Prairie. :p
    L - ...You sure?
    P - Absotively possilutely. Seen the sketch m'self.
    L - I could've sworn that it said "Prairie Dawn" on Muppet Central Radio. Who is it, then?
    P - Some random girl. At least the time I saw it it was.
    L - Well, it sure sounds like Prairie on MCR. And I could've SWORN it was her name.
    P - Nope. But you're right, it does sound like her.
    L - Sheesh. I should really learn to keep my mouth shut on Sesame matters. Back to the REAL Prairie, then...
    P - *ahem* Yes. My favorite Prairie moment is in Elmopalooza! when she's locked in a dressing room with Jon Stewart and most of the crew.
    L - <Giggles!> Personally, I love any time that Prairie has the Sesame characters do a play. Of course, that might just be my general theater envy coming out, but I still love it.
    P - Hehe, yes. Last season she put on a healthy food play, and Zoe was a potato.
    L - I do seem to recall you mentioning that.
    P - Probably because it was so awesome.
    L - That, and you were telling me about whom the kids you were babysitting could and could not recognize.
    P - Was that the same time? Hm. Well, yes. They didn't know Prairie, that's for sure. Which is a crying shame!
    L - A CRYING shame! Prairie, as previously stated, is fantasticabulous.
    P - Yes, and horribly underrated.
    L - Agreed. She could use some more exposure.
    P - Sha, she's a lot less pink than Abby.
    P - Except really, not all that less.
    L - What difference does it make? She's a typical, smart, human girl, and her voice is a lot less annoying than Zoe's, in my humble opinion.
    P - Oh yes. Even though they're performed by the same person.
    L - Funny how that works.
    P - Ain't it? Have we anything more to say about Prairie?
    L - Well... Since you mentioned that twenty-three, with Pepe, is YOUR favorite number... I'd like to point out that eighteen is MY favorite number, and- if anyone looks close enough at a lot of my writing- is frequently used as a sort of symbolism. And I feel that it's very appropriate for Prairie to be at number eighteen.
    P - Yes, yes I agree.
    L - And she plays piano. And likes plays. And she's smart.
    P - And she's a girl.
    L - She kind of reminds me of myself, except... nicer. And shorter. And cuter. And less annoying. And more out-going. ...Okay, so basically, she's how I would LIKE to see myself. ...Except for the height. I'm short enough.
    P - ...Yes, and the fact that your Letters of the Day don't get eaten constantly by a furry blue monster.
    L - Oh, that too.

    17. The Count von Count (Sesame Street)

    P - That's 83! 83 wonderful Muppets we have counted! Ah! Ah! Ah!
    L - THUNDER! LIGHTNING! ...<cough> Headslap blink <cough> <Ahem> Sorry, coming down with a little cold. Anyway. THE COUNT!
    P - Gosh, ya know, The Count just HAD to be one of those really corny, really stupid jokes that Jim or Jerry Juhl just thought of in a writer's meeting.
    L - <Giggles!> Probably. And look what came of it!
    P - I know! He's a cult icon!
    L - He counts credits!
    P - He counts everything!
    L - He counts flowers, and then counts his sneezes!
    P - He counts his toes, then counts someone elses toes!
    L - He counts the lights going on, and then counts the lights going off!
    P - He counts... everything!
    L - One thing you can definitely say about The Count. He said it himself in song.
    P - What?
    L - Baby, you can count on him!
    P - Oh that's lovely.
    L - ...So how much schtick do you think we'll take if we don't mention a certain moderator at this point?
    P - Umm... well, I think we'll get hit with a lot of schticks if that's what you mean.
    L - Sounds painful. Maybe we should mention?
    P - Probably. WE LOVE YOU ED!
    L - Should we also mention dorms?
    L - I'll take that as a 'yes.'
    P - How coincidental that our good friend Ed's birthday was just a few days ago too.
    L - Well, goodness gracious! I guess this worked out pretty darn well, then.
    P - Indeed it did! So The Count! He's one of the few surviving Jerry Nelson Sesame characters!
    L - And thank goodness for him.
    P - Oh my gosh yes. Do you know how many teeth The Count has?
    L - I can't say I've ever counted.
    P - Two. And he counts them every morning.
    L - <Giggles!> Oh, good. I hope he brushes them, too.
    P - Yes, of course he does. I love his cape.
    L - I love his nose.
    P - And eyebrows!
    L - And eyes, and age, both of which were mentioned in that paper I keep referencing...
    P - Hehehe, do tell.
    L - "Muppet designers also tend to reveal certain characteristics through the eyes. Older characters typically have smaller pupils than younger characters. For example, the Count von Count, written to have a psychological age of 1,832, 652 years, has smaller pupils than Elmo, written to have the psychological age of a three-year-old."
    P - Hahaha! Oh that's brilliant!
    L - Oh why thank you. I must say that I'm proud of that paper. And! I must thank The Count von Count for something else.
    P - Spill.
    L - <Knocks over hot chocolate mug>
    P - Oh just tell us!
    L - Oh, of course. The mug was empty, anyway. But I digress! Had it not been for The Count, I doubt I would have ever been inspired to have the patience to sit down with a copy of Seventeen magazine- what a coincidence, for number seventeen on the countdown- and count all 875 pictures, as well as the fifty-five pages of more than a sentence or two, as well as the nineteen pages in paragraph form, in the 184 page magazine, for another paper and presentation that I got an A on.
    P - *blink* And all this time I wondered who performed the Countess, turned out it was you.
    L - Oh I wish.
    P - Yes, that would be cool.
    L - Cool like The Count.
    P - He can count the temperature.
    L - Does he count in F or C?
    P - He lives in New York. They don't know C there.
    L - Oh good, because all I know of C is that zero is thirty-two and thirty-five is ninety-five.
    P - So many wonderful numbers!
    L - Ah, ah, ah!

    16. Gobo Fraggle (Fraggle Rock)

    L - Every day the world begins again...
    P - Oh my gosh it's Gobo! Lisa, we better Get Goin'!
    L - Yes, and make sure to Catch the Tail by the Tiger!
    P - Well, ya know, I Knew I Was Good.
    L - I Knew My Name. But for some reason, I just can't be The Me I Wanna Be.
    P - What a shame. Maybe you should just Pass It On?
    L - I can do that, I Swear!
    P - To Be Fair?
    L - Now solemnly repeat after me.
    P - Now solemnly repeat after me. No, no Wembley, you're not supposed to say what he says-- I swear!
    L - I swear!
    P - Okay let's stop before we get ahead of ourselves.
    L - Yes, and before the Chest of Drawers tables the Chair's suggestion.
    P - Indeed. We wouldn't want that happening. *ahem* Gobo. Love Gobo.
    L - Gotta love Gobo. And his occasional Canadian accent, which pretty much entirely consists of the occasional "Eh."
    P - Hahaha, oh yes. I love that so much. And his relationship with every Fraggle.
    L - And he HAS a relationship with EVERY Fraggle! It's awesome. And he sounds like Robin. ...<Ahem> Do you realize that we have two Jerry Nelson characters in a row here?
    P - Oh yes. It's fantasticly Jerry-fied. Gobo's my favorite of Jerry's constantly singing characters.
    L - How many of Jerry's chracters constantly sing?
    P - Gobo. ...Hmm, maybe Marjory.
    L - Robin sings a lot, too.
    P - Yeah, but not constantly.
    L - Fair enough, I suppose. Anyway, Gobo's totally the leader of the little Fraggle pack.
    P - Heck yes he is. Could you imagine any of the other Fraggles leading them?
    L - Red could imagine it.
    P - Yeah, but she couldn't do it.
    L - True. Mokey has done it once or twice, when Gobo's been off exploring...
    P - Yes, but she didn't do too well... made everyone wear flowers or something I'm sure. No offense to Mokey of course.
    L - ...She also saved the Fraggles from starvation. But anyway, back to Gobo. He's got a good heart.
    P - Oh he does. And a good... hairdo?
    L - ...Um... good... hats.
    P - Haha, his hats. I love them. He also has good friends. And songs. And... a good explorer's spirit.
    L - And a good head on his shoulders. And, of course, a good voice.
    P - Well he's a Jerry character, of course he has a good voice.
    L - Because he has a great Muppeteer!
    P - Yup yup! And his best friend is Wembley!
    L - Whom we will get to in a bit. Have we more Gobo things to say?
    P - Uhhh... not really.
    L - Then I suppose we should move on.
    P - Probably. It's getting late.

    15. Sam Eagle (The Muppet Show)

    L - Sam the AMERICAN Eagle.
    P - I doubt he supports himself being on this list.
    L - Certainly not, with all these WEIRDOS and completely un-American, crazy, Muppets. He would not want to be associated with them.
    P - Never in a million years. But that's why we put him on here.
    L - ExACTly! Because EVEN THOUGH he wants NOTHING to do with them... He still lives and works with the Muppets, diligently doing EVERYTHING in his power to make them more... AMERICAN.
    P - He keeps the flame of Liberty alive I suppose.
    L - He tries. In the mean time, the other Muppets keep the flames of chaos, disorder, and craziness alive and well.
    P - And if that isn't the American dream I don't know what is.
    L - Neither do I, but I'm sure Sam would beg to differ.
    P - Which is why we don't let Muppets in on our countdown.
    L - Quite. Now, for someone so strict and stern, Sam is typically rather randomly written into the movies. It's like the writers said, "Oh, crap, we need Sam in here. Uh... Here, we'll just shove him into the Happiness Hotel and have him call them weirdos. That works."
    P - Haha, yes, or just wondering how weddings work in MTM.
    L - Or asking if the movie has any... What was it? Morally redeeming qualities, or something?
    P - Something like that, yes. But then there's MTI where he becomes Mister Arrow. Then subsequently the Ghost of Mister Arrow, but I digress.
    L - And speaking of ghosts, the Ghost of Christmas Past also showed us that Sam makes a good Headmaster, but has trouble moving his patriotic roots. "It is the AMERICAN way!" "Uh, Sam- it's just...." "...Oh. It is the BRITISH way!"
    P - Hehe, I just watched that scene. I love that part so much. Sam is just such a loser, but that's why people love him.
    L - Indeed! He's so stiff and un-huggable that you almost want to hug him.
    P - It's almost like you HAVE to hug him. He's just that un-huggable.
    L - He is! And yet I seem to recall that when we started working on this list, we were both starting to feel a little more heart in Sam than is typically seen.
    P - Oh of course. He's just got his heart in different places than the others, and it's wearing camoflauge.
    L - Yup. Blends right in with the American flag.
    P - Oh nice.
    L - Isn't it though?
    P - Yes. He's a Frank character.
    L - He is! Which is ironic, because he couldn't be more different from Animal.
    P - Haha, or... any of the other Frank characters really. Any of the other Muppets really.
    L - I dunno, he's got his similarities to Bert.
    P - Yes, but even Bert can have a fun side. Sam doesn't have fun.
    L - At least not that we see. But he DOES appreciate some good culture... He just has very strict ideas of what qualifies as "good culture."
    P - And how to express enjoyment of said good culture.
    L - Yes, well... He's unique.
    P - That's one word for it I suppose.
    L - It is.
    P - Weird is another word for it. By our standards anyway.
    L - Yes, but our standards are rather strange, too...
    P - Eh, so what, we're runnin' this list, not Sam.
    L - This is true. And speaking of running, shall we run on?
    P - Probably. Before we run out.

    14. The Swedish Chef (The Muppet Show)

    P - Are we doing this in Mock Swedish?
    L - Ooh, de Chef, de booskie doodle!
    P - Maybe I'll just translate. Lisa says, "Ooh, the Chef, let's make snicker-doodle cookies to feed the homeless!"
    L - Ya, ya, de Sweeeedena Køøk! De føødena tasty-pasty nøø.
    P - "Yes, yes, the Sweeeeeeedish Chef! The food is tasty and pasty now!"
    L - Nüüpen de grøøskie dabble gobbledy. OOH! De Müppen Føøpily Christmøøs wippen de Biggedy børd!
    P - "I never dabble int he grotesque practice of gobbling. OOH! The Muppet Rudely Children whipped me with big boards!"
    L - Un de seeengen de cry-de-bye-de. Un de Müppen Shøø! Un de chickie in de baskie. Two points.
    P - "On the second day of Christmas I said goodbye to my true love. On the Muppet Show! She was a cute chickie in a basket. Scored two points."
    L - Yabber de lüshkie bünch de bordle. Kadøødle de høøpen de handies, yash de børdle de hud.
    P - "I even had a lush bunch of burglars. They kadoodled the happenin' hands, yeah they burgled in the hood."
    L - Ya, ya, de Frank de handies, un de Jim-Jim hud. Un de talkety talky!
    P - "Yes, yes, the Frank handles, and the Jim heads. Oh the talk that induced..."
    L - <double-take> Indücee?
    P - "Indubidibly?"
    L - Schkew de bøøple shnükers! De Cheffidee køøk de yuck-yuck føør de Müppens!
    P - "The boople shnukers have been skewed. The Chef cooks the Yip Yip Martians for the Muppets."
    L - Yippin de yippers. Hoop, un de sandwoosh fleeg!
    P - "I'm a yippin' yipper. Look, a sandwich for the fleeg!"
    L - Ya, ya. Yabber de moovskie on?
    P - "Yes, yes. Have I yabbered enough to move on?"
    L - Shurpen de loopy! Heeeeeeeeeee de GOO!
    P - Please see the Mock Swedish/English dictionary for translation.

    13. Cookie Monster (Sesame Street)

    P - No, crackers.
    L - Oh. That okay. Me like crackers, too. AHHHHHHHH num num num num num...
    P - Me like everyt'ing. Even fruits and vegetables. But not as much as cookies. You hear d'at news media?
    L - Yeah. Cookie Monster. NOOOOOOOT Veggie Monster.
    P - Me not change me name to Brusslesprout Monster!
    L - Noooo. Me no can SPELL Brusslesprout Monster! But me know how spell Cookie Monster. Me know how spell COOKIE! CUE MUSIC!
    P - We no have time for d'at. Unless you want MP3 (which not food, by da way) of song. D'en you PM me. Me get you file.
    L - No time for music?
    P - Well let's think how long we've been sitting here doing d'is part of list.
    L - Oh... No time for music. But! Time for COOOOOOOOOOOOOKIEEEEEEEEEES! AHHHHH num num num num num! Delicious!
    P - Always time for COOKIES!
    L - And, for letter of day! Letter of day always tasty.
    P - And... other stuff.
    L - Like truck.
    P - And telephone. Me burped dial tone for weeks!
    L - And typewriter! Good source of iron.
    P - And ink.
    L - And- THIS LIST! AHHHHHHH num num num num num... Oops...
    P - Oh no... Lisa, what have you done? The last twelve Muppets were still on there! And you have the only copy!
    L - Um... I re-write it! I remember. Next is, um... Next is...
    P - Nice seque.

    12. Oscar the Grouch (Sesame Street)

    P - Oscar is one of those characters that's just perfect in character.
    L - What I think is interesting about Oscar is that people either love him or hate him.
    P - Well duh. That's 'cause he both loves and hates people.
    L - He loves to hate them and hates to love them. He loves them anyway. He just doesn't like to admit it.
    P - No way! He's Oscar the Grouch! And may I say, that upon reading Caroll Spinney's marvelous book, that he's one of my heroes now.
    L - I've gotta read that book. Oh! That reminds me! Oscar the Grouch was used to advertise the career fair at my school.
    P - Haha, really?
    L - Really! There was a picture that was just his eyes peeking out of the trashcan, and it said something like, "Go to career fair, or you'll end up like this!" And they meant for "this" to be a bitter grouch living in a trash can, but I couldn't help doubting that being like Oscar wouldn't be such a BAD thing... He's an international star, after all, and lots of people love him...
    P - Oh good grief, you would think that. ...Actually, any Muppet fan would.
    L - Clearly, my school wasn't anticipating any Muppet fans.
    P - Of course not. Most schools don't.
    L - Which is such a pity. They SHOULD! In fact, they should EXPECT that the students are Muppet fans. Then we'd get more of them, because students would feel left out if they didn't know anything about the Muppets.
    P - Exactly! We should speak to the union about this.
    L - What union?
    P - The Obsessed Muppet fan union.
    L - Ohhhhhhh. Yes, yes, we SHOULD speak to them about this.
    P - Now if only somone would create it.
    L - Hey, you're the one with the powerful positions around here, not me...
    P - Maybe we should ask Oscar to help us with it. Think he would? I mean, if he knew it would mean we'd have to leave him alone.
    L - If we could convince him that helping us would make him miserable, possibly.
    P - But that would just make him happy if he was miserable.
    L - Exactly!
    P - Oh. But doesn't it make him miserable if he's happy?
    L - Yup.
    P - But... then he'd be happy if he was... miserable. And then he'd be happy... but... wha?
    L - What can I say? He's a grouch.
    P - That he is.
    L - And you've gotta love the things he sings. He loves trash!
    P - And hates Christmas!
    L - And firmly believes in the big heap of trash at the end of the rainbow.
    P - And... other Grouchy stuff!
    L - Yup. He is one genuine grouch, alright.
    P - And he has been for 38 years.
    L - Except that he used to be orange. How odd.
    P - Yeah, it's a good thing he took that vacation to Swamp Mushy Muddy and turned green.
    L - Oh, is that how it happened? I've always wondered.
    P - Yup. Caroll said so himself in his book.
    L - ...Like I said, I really need to read that book.
    P - Mmhm.
    L - Oscar has nicknames for lots of people, too...
    P - Skinny, liver-lips, feathers, turkey, little red menace...
    L - Little red menace is his?
    P - Oh yes. In Elmo's World The Street We Live On.
    L - Oh very good. He's got that car, too, and I'm blanking on the name...
    P - The Sloppy Jalopy!
    L - That, yes. He took it on a road trip to find Big Bird.
    P - We've gone this whole thing without mentioning Slimey! And Telly!
    L - Well, there's just so much to SAY about this grouch... Okay, so Slimey has this habit of showing that Oscar does in fact have a heart. I distinctly remember seeing the grouch tuck the worm in, and then immediately turn to the camera and very defensively inform me that I didn't see it.
    P - Oh yes, that, and every time he does that he tells people to scram.
    L - He ALWAYS tells people to scram, regardless of what he's doing. Sometimes they listen.
    P - Most of the time, Telly is a good example of this, they don't.
    L - Ah, yes, Telly. He's got a soft spot for the grouch.
    P - Did you know Telly started the Grouchkateers?
    L - I suspected it, but I wasn't certain.
    P - I'm pretty sure he did. I love Telly. But I really, really love Oscar. My third favorite Sesame character.
    L - I'm not surprised. But I'm pretty sure your first and second favorite Sesame characters are later in the list, so... shall we?
    P - Yes. Glad you caught that intended segue.
    L - Better to catch it than to let it hit your head and give a concussion.
    P - ...Exactly. Unless you're trying to please Oscar.
    L - Oscar wasn't around when that darned whiffel ball hit me... But I digress. Moving on.
    P - Yes please.

    11. Wembley Fraggle (Fraggle Rock)

    P - I'm well aware!
    L - Hi well aware, I'm Insane A. Sylum, and THIS is WEMBLEY!
    P - Are you sure? Maybe it is... but then again it might not be.
    L - Well, gee, I... I THINK it is... I dunno, though... Maybe it's not... No, no, it's GOTTA be!
    P - Well... okay, if you say so.
    L - It's okay with me if it's okay with you.
    P - Well it's fine with me it's fine with you. Should we ask Gobo?
    L - Maybe. Or maybe we should ask Boober.
    P - Mokey's over there painting, she'd know! Or... just have me find a rock for her to paint...
    L - How come every time I take a walk and meet somebody then the somebody's got something to do? And how come every time they say, "I need a special helper! And the special helper's GOTTA be you?" Everybody's got somebody helping- ain't it strange? How come they won't help ME for a change?
    P - Because you're just a little wimp!
    L - I thought I was the sofa?
    P - Oh. Okay if you say so.
    L - It's okay with me if it's okay with you. Say, do you think I should pull out my paper again and see what it says about Wembley?
    P - If you want to. I guess you could if you want to.
    L - Well I don't know. Do I want to?
    P - Oh I guess go ahead.
    L - Well okay, if you say so. I'll just go find it...
    P - I'll wait here. All alone... again... LIIIIIIIIISA!
    L - I'm here! I'm here! I'm right here! What is it, Prawnie? Is something wrong? Do you need my help?
    P - ...I don't know.
    L - Oh. Well- That's okay. I don't know, either! Oh- but I found the part about Wembley in my paper.
    P - Are you gonna show us?
    L - Well- I dunno. Do you want me to?
    P - YES! *ahem* Please.
    L - Oh, sure! Why didn't you say so? It goes like this- <ahem> "When it does exist, the nose may have its own details of the puppet’s character to reveal or emphasize. Wembley, a character on the international children’s show Fraggle Rock, has an exceptionally long nose for a Fraggle. He also has difficulty making up his own mind, and he often goes along with what anyone around him suggests. His long nose makes it easy to see how the other characters physically and mentally push him around."
    P - How does the nose show that? Because he's different?
    L - Well, because it shows which way he's facing. And it's good for hanging socks to dry, too.
    P - Ohhh I see. Yes, very good for hanging socks on. Wembley only has one shirt though, so he doesn't hang any of his own socks.
    L - No. But Boober does. Wembley's real nice about it, too. And he's got a real nice singing voice.
    P - Oh he does. Sleep By the Light of the Moon is a great song of his.
    L - Oh, and so is 'Here to There.' But of course, we can't forget his "Wembling Song" with Gobo.
    P - Gosh no! Wemblin' Fool is FANTASTIC! (Yes, that's actually the title, I was shocked too.)
    P - (And again, I can send it to anyone who wants it.)

    L - (As usual.) And we shouldn't forget who GIVES Wembley such an incredible singing voice...
    P - STEVE! *squealing like a little school girl* *pushes Beau out*
    L - ...Darn that Brit, always sneaking in. But anyway. Steve also gave Wembley that signature little sound he does when he's walking around that Dave said he once caught Steve doing in a shopping mall...
    P - Hahaha, yes, I LOVE that sound! The "uh uh" thing.
    L - Me too! I have NO idea how one would properly spell the sound, but you've just gotta love it.
    P - Oh yes. You gotta. And the Wembley.
    L - You've GOTTA love Wembley. He's such a loyal friend. ...For a wembler.
    P - Indeed! And he isn't that nosey, for a Fraggle with a large nose.
    L - Yup. I can truly reccomend, this wimp for a friend!
    P - As can I. So are we done then?
    L - I don't know. We could be done, if you want to be done.
    P - *wembles about deciding to continue wembling or just being decisive and saying "Yes, I want it to be done."*
    L - Well, while you wemble, I'll tell our readers that if they've ever wondered how long these things take us... This one took us three days, because we kept getting interrupted. It almost took four, actually, because my mom and sister wanted me to come to the grocery store with them.
    P - *continues to wemble* *mumbles not to forget the sponsors and that we only have one more installment left* *unless we decide to divide it in two*
    L - Maybe we should ask somebody if we should be done or not.
    P - Who would we ask? No one's here!
    L - I could ask Leyla. She's right over there. Should I ask her?
    P - Yes, ask her.
    L - Okay. I'll ask her. <Asks Leyla>
    P - While she's gone, I'd like to remind everyone that we only have 10 more Muppets to get through! How exciting, no? Well, as we approach the end of the list, we'll proabably talk on, and on, and on, and on, and on, and... well, we'll probably talk a lot about our favorite characters, so we may end up doing the next two post with five Muppets, not ten. But don't quote me on that.
    L - I'm back! I'm back!
    P - What she said?
    L - She wants to know what number we're on.
    P - Tell her 84. See what she says.
    L - Okay! <goes to tell her>
    P - I am such a devious widdle Prawn...
    L - ...She confused me. She thinks we should do either one more or six more so that we can later do the top ten or top fifteen.
    P - ...Tell her... just tell her we're done.
    L - Okay. Does that mean we're done?
    P - That means we're done.
    L - Yes, and then we'll see you next time on OUR countdown!
    P - Indeed! Prawn out!

    ...<Ahem> Okay, so Elmo's Christmas Countdown is over now, but gimme a break... It takes a long time to get all these colors in!
  6. redBoobergurl

    redBoobergurl Well-Known Member

    Another great installment! Love it! Especially the part with Cookie Monster since he is one of my all time faves. :)
  7. The Count

    The Count Moderator Staff Member

    *Glomps Prawny and Toga. Not only did you update.. But the characters here!

    Why haven't the readers asked for songs Prawn? Maybe because, like me or just me, we're waiting for the countdown to be over so then we can ask for one specific song for each character. Sort of a Top 100 Muppets in song version.
    BTW: Did you know? Steve's Wembley persona evolved out of him performing the character Shaky Sanchez in the Merissa Berenson TMS episode from Season 3 where he performs a bomb balancing act. And of course, this is after Jim already voiced the character in the song "Under My Skin" in the Vincent Price TMSEpisode.
    And no... You're not a devious wittle pwan... You're a devious wittle pwanny foo-foo cakes!
    *Zany and Eduardo waddle in, carrying "Laugh!" cue cards.

    Thank youz guys... Definitely looking forward to count the ten last Muppets with everybody else.
  8. BeakerSqueedom

    BeakerSqueedom Well-Known Member

    Eee! Update Update! :p
  9. theprawncracker

    theprawncracker Well-Known Member

    10. Cantus Fraggle (Fraggle Rock)

    P - I should've brought my mittens.
    L - Why?
    P - Because Cantus is so cooooool!
    L - He is. You've just gotta love him. You said that Gobo was always singing, but CANTUS, well, Cantus IS music!
    P - Cantus embodies music like Oscar embodies trash. Or Fozzie embodies bad jokes!
    L - He also embodies what is possibly the greatest diction of any Muppet. For example, "There are no rules... and those are the rules."
    P - And, "I should've brought my mittens."
    L - ...Yes, and that. Anyway. Music grows in the rose, rock and rain and the blowin' snowstorm, everything seems to sing, everywhere I go...
    P - Ping!
    L - And he received his pipe from a mysterious and invisible... A mysterious and invisible...
    P - What?
    L - No one knows. It was so mysterious... and invisible.
    P - Hmmm... go... and find your songs.
    L - Yes. You have heard enough. Now, it is time to listen.
    P - Listening is the first step, and the last.
    L - The middle steps, you must find on your own.
    P - That is not something Cantus said. But I think it might be something he thought, you think?
    L - I think that if he thought it, he intended us to think it, which we have, so perhaps he did intend it, which would mean that he had thought it.
    P - You think?
    L - The question is... do YOU?
    P - Do I... or do you. Do we? Do any of us?
    L - Some do, and some do not. It is most unfortunate that those who do not, do not, but some must not, or everyone would.
    P - Would they though? Choices, it's all about choices.
    L - Yes, choices. The choice to hear or to listen, to talk or to speak... to sing, or to dance to another's song.
    P - Or to sing another’s song while another sings your own.
    L - That is not the best choice, but it is a choice that some make.
    P - Songs... is there anything more that we need?
    L - There is. The means to play them, sing them, and hear them.
    P - Hearing! That is the most important!
    L - For we can only listen to what we hear.
    P - And only hear what we listen for.
    L - And only play what we have heard and listened to.
    P - And only listen and hear what is played.
    L - And only play what we choose to.
    P - Especially if that choice is a walkin', talkin', breathin' ball of fire!
    L - I would like to take this opportunity to point out that Cantus was such an incredible Jim character that when the Juhl's were given the opportunity to name a cove on their property, they named it for Cantus.
    P - Indeed they did! And Cantus was as much Jim as any of his other characters! ...Can I PLEASE talk about Convincing John here since we forgot him on this list?
    L - Very well. But I like Cantus way better.
    P - Thank you, I do too, just need to say something. I could totally see Jim in an ugly plaid suit knocking on my door trying to sell me something through song. And me totally buying it.
    L - Hey, if Jim Henson tried to sell me something, I'd buy it just for the sake of buying something from Jim Henson! ...It would be rather difficult nowadays, mind you, but... Yes.
    P - Well duh. But anyway! CANTUS ROCKS!
    L - He DOES! And I think he would TOTALLY be even higher on the list, if only there weren't so many awesome Muppets in the world.
    P - Indeed he would. I think he's probably the only character this high on the list to appear only five times.
    P - Actually, I know he is.
    L - How many characters on this ENTIRE list only appear five times?
    P - ...I'll get back to you on that.
    L - I have a feeling it's not a lot, which speaks volumes about Cantus.
    P - Exactly. And Cantus doesn't even have to speak in volumes, his voice is perfect.
    L - And I LOVE the way he talks. And I love his PIPE! And his clothes, and the way he looks, and just- EVERYTHING! I mean... Honestly, I can find SOMETHING about most of the Muppets on this list that I don't ABSOLUTELY LOVE. But Cantus? The only thing I don't ABSOLUTELY LOVE about him is the only-five-appearances thing. But even that, I kind of like, because it makes us appreciate him more.
    P - *blink* Exactly.
    L - ...Have we said everything already? How about his wandering ways, and how it was a reflection of Jim at the time...
    P - And how he is just totally a reflection of Jim with a pipe!
    L- And- ...And- ...And how CONFUSING he is! But still the leader of the minstrels! And just- ...just... FANTASTICABULOUS IN EVERY WAY AND IN EVERY SENSE OF THE WORD!
    P - Yes. Yes he is.
    L - He is indeed.
    P - *happy sigh* Moving on?
    L - <Happy sigh> I suppose.

    9. Ernie and Bert (Sesame Street)

    L - Prawnie? Do you know there's a banana in your ear?
    P - Beg pardon?
    L - I said, you have a banana in your ear!
    P - I'm sorry, did you say something?
    L - I SAID, You have a BANANA in your EAR!
    P - Hmm? Oh, sorry Lisa, I can't hear you. I have a banana in my ear.
    L - ...GAAAAH!
    P - What more do we need to say?
    L - They're not gay.
    P - ...Thank you for that.
    L - Unless we mean 'gay' as in 'happy,' in which case, they are.
    P - Oh, indeed, but who means it that way anymore?
    L - Christmas carols.
    P - I hear they're being audited.
    L - Oh, pity. But anyway, about Ernie and Bert.
    P - Where does their income come from?
    L - Well, Bert makes some money as president of the Association of W lovers,
    and Ernie, um... Um?
    P - Um. Exactly. But who cares? They're Ernie and Bert! Or... Bert and Ernie I
    L - Exactly. The vertical and horizontal stripes. The up-tight and the laid-back. The Frank and the Jim.
    P - In my opinion, the best thought out, designed, and played Muppets.
    L - You know when they were first playing with the characters, Frank tried Ernie and Jim tried Bert? And then they switched, and stayed switched.
    P - Yup! I believe they looked in the mirror and Jim said, "This doesn't feel right, let's switch."
    L - Thank goodness for that. I can't imagine those two being switched from the way they are.
    P - GOSH no. Can you imagine an uptight Jim?
    L - ...I think that's oxy-moronic. OH! WAIT!
    P – Huh?
    L - Ernie and Bert were in my paper! Where, um... Stall! I'll look!
    P - Stall? STALL? ...*does a soft-shoe dance step*
    L - ...Oh, nice. I found it!
    P - I am SO good...
    L - "Putting more emphasis on a character’s slimness, Muppet designer and
    builder Don Sahlin gave Sesame Street’s uptight character Bert a thin body with a tall, skinny, pointy head, and a vertically striped shirt. His all-vertical features are perfectly offset by his counterpart Ernie, also created by Don Sahlin. Ernie is a shorter, fatter character with a shorter, fatter head and horizontal stripes that make him more relaxed and laid back."
    P - Love it! And SO true! So... who you prefer? Bert or Ernie?
    L - Wait! There's more in the paper!
    P - There's always more...
    L - "Ernie’s red nose fits with European clown tradition, in which there are two kinds of clowns- “red nose,” the jokester, and “white face,” the straight man. Bert is certainly the straight man on Sesame Street, and although he does not have a white face, Ernie the jokester is a perfect fit to his red nose."
    P - Wow, awesome comparison. So... Bert or Ernie?
    L - Ernie or Bert.
    P - Curse you.
    L - Hey! That is very un-Sesame of you!
    P - Oh please, like mentioning gay wasn't?
    L - It's not MY fault so many people misinterpret their friendship.
    P - True, but ya didn't have to go and say it. Anyway! Rubber Duckie! The
    biggest hit the Muppets have had since Piggy's karate chop!
    L - RUBBER DUCKIE! Oh! So last month I was visiting the Hebrew School where I used to work. The most urgent question any student or students had for me? "MISS LISA! What's the second verse to Rubber Duckie?"
    P - Hahaha, how very pertinent and important!
    L - Absolutely! So naturally, I started singing. I think that was the same day as when a student told me that she was doing a report on Frank Oz. It was a good day.
    P - Oh I would imagine!
    L - But back to the question at hand... I reverse it. Who do YOU like better?
    P - Bert.
    P - *waits for shocked reaction*
    L - ...That- ...surprises me. Didn't you test an Ernie personality?
    P - Yes. I am Ernie and Fozzie. And that's why I like Bert better.
    L - ...Logical. Me, I'm more of an Ernie fan... but I really prefer the two of them together. For example, Bert collects, and Ernie has Rubber Duckie... So I collect rubber duckies.
    P - Well I love them both, just Bert the very tiniest bit more. For instance, Ernie's songs are much better and more memorable than Bert's.
    L - This is true. But I've gotta tell ya, I would LOVE it if Bert could give me a tiny lesson on how to do the pigeon. I'd do it all the time.
    P - Haha, oh yes, that's definitely his "Rubber Duckie."
    L - Absolutely! Gosh, I just wanna hug Bert now. I'm thinking about all the times he's been the butt of Ernie's jokes.
    P - Which is all the time.
    L - Yup! OH! You know what song I LOVE, speaking of Ernie and Bert?
    P - Things That I Remember? Upside Down World? Dance Myself To Sleep?
    P - (All of which are available to anyone who asks for them.)
    L - ...Yes, yes, and yes! But I was specifically thinking of UPSIDE DOWN WORLD! I think it was the first song from Follow That Bird that I heard on Muppet Central Radio, and it reminded me how much I'd watched it when I was little, and wanted to watch it again, and... And I just LOVE the song! It's so typical of them, too, how it all pans out...
    P - Oh I know! Bert ends up loving it, and Ernie leaves him hanging... upside down.
    L - And poor Bert doesn't know how to fly the plane! I LOVE that they switch seats mid-flight, too.
    P - That's just SO funny to me.
    L - And to me! And Bert losing his bottle-cap collection...
    P - That was very sad...
    L - Yes, very. I hope Big Bird picked them up and brought them back to Sesame Street.
    P - Knowing him, I bet he did.
    L - Me too. I love the lyrics to the song, too. I randomly start singing it all the time when I need to cheer myself up.
    P - Hehehe, I do that with "The Rhyming Song."
    L - Oh, that's another fun one! OH! What about when Ernie and Bert did that rhyming game thing? And Ernie just sort of stopped as soon as Bert got enthused, so Bert tried to do it with a lamp...
    P - Hahaha YES! Or the "La, La, La" song where Bert said "Linoleum!"
    L - I randomly shout "Linoleum" whenever we start randomly la-la-la-ing on MSN in Bert's honor.
    P - How awesome.
    L - I guess I am kind of Bert-like. I'd love to do the pigeon, I collect all sorts of stuff, I take the linoleum line... And I'd much rather wear vertical stripes than horizontal. ...On the other hand, I can hardly see the floor of my bedroom for how messy it is, so... I've got a fair share of Ernie in me, too.
    P - You're very evenly balanced. I'm all Ernie though.
    L - But I've heard you keep your room very clean, which is very Bert-like of you. And you keep your Muppet merchandise very nicely and neatly arranged and displayed, which is also Bert-like.
    P - I arrange the stuff because it's important to me, like Rubber Duckie, and I cleaned it for Layla's behalf.
    L - Oh, alright. But you still CLEANED your room. I merely straightened mine enough to walk into it.
    P - Well that was nice of you.
    L - I tried. But you CLEANED! I think everyone has a little Bert and a little Ernie in them, and that's part of why we like them so much: They very comedically portray the struggle between up-tight and laid-back within all of us.
    P - Exactly!
    L - Which also makes them very easy to relate to. I can definitely understand Bert's frustration with Ernie's banana-in-the-ear gag when a Hebrew school student insists on using a phony English accent instead of concentrating on his work, but I can also understand Ernie's love of provoking Bert when Leyla and I are having a competition to see who can get Beau to fall off of his chair first...
    P - Yup, yup. Everyone's Ernie, everyone's Bert. But only they are themselves.
    L - Which is why they struggled getting actors to portray them for a gingerbread-man-in-the-ear gag in the recent Sesame Christmas special.
    P - Which is the funniest thing to come from them in years.
    L - And SUCH an awesome nod to the old banana-in-the-ear gag.
    P - Which is completely AWESOME because they NEVER reference old school Sesame!
    L - Well then, it's about time!
    P - And really it wasn't a nod! It was a full blown parody! They freakin' parodied themselves! Can they do that?
    L - Apparently they can, because they DID! And it was awesome.
    P - Just like Ernie and Bert.
    L - Or Bert and Ernie.
    P - Eh, I like 'em both.
    L - You know once, in a fanfiction, I was having a character think about all the inseparable friendships they could think of, and I didn't know whether to say "Ernie and Bert" or "Bert and Ernie," so I used both. "Ernie and Bert. Bert and Ernie."
    P - Hahaha! Oh I love that.
    L - It was fun! ...Or at least, it's fun in hindsight. At the time, I believe I was just frustrated with my indecisiveness.
    P - Go figure. Are we done here?
    L - I think we are. Next?
    P - Yes.
    L - Wait- ...Here, put in these earplugs.
    P - ...*does so*
    L - Trust me.
    P - Do I have a choice?
    L - Nope.
    P - And this is my life, folks!

    8. Robin the Frog (The Muppet Show)
    P - *reading newspaper* Hm.
    P - *flips through paper* Huh, the Phillies won...
    P - *reading* I didn't realize Iowa was still a state...
    P - *folds up paper* *starts smoking pipe with bubbles coming out of it* I
    should probably check the stocks...
    P - *blowing bubbles* *wonders where to check stocks*
    P - *ignores Robin for stocks*
    P - Hmm... Why would Enron's stocks be up? *shrugs*
    P - *looks at watch* Didn't I have that thing to do with Lisa...
    P - Hmm... it's probably too late to do it now... I'll just stay here.
    L - AND HE'S SUUUUUUUCH AN OPTIMIST! LIKE IN "IT'S A VERY MERRY MUPPET CHRISTMAS MOVIE!" When Kermit's all down in the dumps and "It was all for nothing" And Robin's all like, "But it'll be okay, RIGHT Uncle Kermit? We'll just pull together, and- everything will be fine!" I am telling you, NO MUPPET believes in The Muppet Ideals as strongly as Robin! BECAUSE HE'S BEING RAISED WITH THEM! I am so jealous of that little cutie...
    P - *hears whistle* I should get the tea off the stove...
    L - AND HE'S A FROG SCOUT! With his cute little uniform and badges and he works SO HARD for those badges! You just gotta love him! He is SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO SWEEEEEEEEEEET!
    P - Did I ever mail Lisa that Robin action figure... Oh I'm sure I did. *sips tea*
    L - <Points at Prawnie> He did! The only action figure I own is of ROBIN! FROG SCOUT ROBIN! SOOOOOO adorable. I have him standing on his trunk with his backpack on talking to the little penguin figure thing I bought in Israel. SOOOOOOOOOOOOO ADORABLE! AND I LOVE IT!
    P - *yawns*
    L - Maybe I should get Prawnie to take his earplugs out so that he can contribute.
    P - *nods off*
    L - Yeah, I think I should. <Reaches over and pulls earplugs out of Prawnie's ears> PRAWNIIIIIIIIIE!
    P - *falls out of chair*
    L - Sorry, but you were falling asleep. ROBIN! ROBIN! ROBIN! WE'RE TALKING ABOUT ROBIN!
    P - Oh, yeah, Robin, he's great.
    L - ...<Headslap> He's MORE than GREAT, you lousy prawn! He's NUMBER EIGHT ON THE LIST! He didn't get there for nothing!
    P - I have to save my energy.
    L - ...<Sigh> Lousy Prawn. It's ROBIN! You've GOTTA say SOMETHING!
    P – Rabbi.
    L - ...<Whacks Prawnie over the head with a frying pan>
    P - *unconscious* *wonders how to do the rest of the list*
    L - ...<Splashes cold water on Prawnie's face>
    P - *wet* *spits out water*
    L - Should we move on to the next Muppet?
    P - Hmm... I feel like I haven't gotten to say anything about Robin.
    L - <HEADSLAP>
    P - Wocka! Wocka!
    L - DID you have anything to say about Robin?
    P - He's the highest ranking Jerry Nelson character on the list.
    P - My sentiments exactly.

    7. Rowlf the Dog (The Muppet Show)

    P - I'm Rowlf, Rowlf the Dog. Sitcherself down.
    P - Don't make me get the earplugs again...
    L - ...<Pouts>
    P - Thank you. Now, I recall somewhere, not sure where, you comparing Rowlf and Fozzie. You said they were both comedians, only one of them isn't professional, and the other's not funny.
    L - Yup! That was after Beau and I were stalking you.
    P - I thought so, yes. Well it's very true.
    L - It is! He's just dog-gone funny!
    P - Ooh, nice.
    L - Thank you. He's legendary for his punning and fetching.
    P - I love that dog so much... his SINGING! That piano!
    P - Favorite Rowlf song?
    L - Tough call... I'm gonna say... “I've Never Harmed An Onion.”
    P - Gosh, really? I mean, it's great yes. But my favorite has to be "What a Wonderful World." Followed VERY closely by "I Hope That Somethin' Better Comes Along" and "You and I and George."
    L - Oh, those are good too. "I Hope That Somethin' Better Comes Along" is definitely one of my favorites. I know it's really sort of aimed against women, but it always cheers me up.
    P - Oh I like it BECAUSE it's aimed against women... *happy sigh* Such a truthful song...
    L - Yup. ...HEY! ...Yeah... <Ahem> I also like it when he sings songs that other Muppets have sung.
    P - Oh me too. "Bein' Green" is another personal favorite and good example of that.
    L - Along with "Wishing Song" and "Carbon Paper." I especially love "Carbon Paper."
    P - Oh my gosh, "Carbon Paper" is one of my favorite Muppet songs EVER.
    L - LOVE IT! Considered singing it for a talent show that ended up not happening.
    P - Oh that would've been funny. I should sing "I Hope That Something Better Comes Along." Just to spite.
    L - <Scrunchy face> <Ahem> The funniest thing would've been seeing how many of today's college students know what carbon paper is, and I mean the stuff, not the song.
    P - Haha, the song too...
    L - Well, yes. But anyway! ROOOOOOOWLF!
    P - Rowlf, Rowlf the Dog.
    L - One of the oldest Muppets.
    P - First one to be on national television.
    L - He even went on tour!
    P - He did! Gosh, he's so awesome... Wonder when he first played the piano. Was it just a TMS thing?
    L - No, I'm pretty sure he had a piano on Jimmy Dean. Which reminds me, at one point, he got more fan-mail than Jimmy Dean did!
    P - He did! Because he's ROWLF of course!
    L - And he is FREAKING AWESOME!
    P - Which is why he's so high up. I just... I LOVE Rowlf. Think about how much his popularity HASN'T died down, even though it had plenty of chances.
    L - I KNOOOOOW! He's one of the EARLIEST Muppets to appear in the 2008 day-by-day Muppet calendar!
    P - Rowlf, my friend, was the FOURTH Muppet to appear on said calendar. Before Gonzo, before Animal, before Beaker.
    L - Before the Swedish Chef!
    P - Before... well, a lot of Muppets!
    L - YEAH! AND, and and, he was technically there displayed for TWO days, since it was a Saturday/Sunday page of the calendar. And BOY, does he DESERVE it!
    P - SHA! And a GREAT picture too. (Okay folks, if you can't tell by now, you need to go buy this calendar.)
    L - (You MUST buy this calendar!) With the piano! Rowlf with his piano!
    P - The way it should be!
    L - Absolutely!
    P - Rowlf has been in every single Muppet movie, has he not?
    L - Um... Yes, he has! He even got a reference in Kermit's Swamp Years!
    P - And how many Muppets can say that? Honestly!
    L - Um... Three, if you include Rowlf. Plus two cameos.
    P - Indeed, and we already talked about them. Well... wait, Wilson had an Animal keychain, didn't he?
    L - Yes, that's one of the references. The other is the most vague. "A pig, huh? Well, I never wanna see another one of those again!"
    P - Yup, yup! Well... do we count Salmon Friends?
    L - That wasn't a reference to a specific Muppet. That was a reference to a show title.
    P - Good point. Anyway, ROWLF! He was even on Muppets Tonight!
    L - Oh that I wouldn't know about. Praytell!
    P - He played piano for Garth Brooks during "We Shall Be Free" (WHICH I WILL SEND TO YOU!) and chuckled at the camera.
    L - Aw... I love the way he laughs. And his SMILE! And his EYES!
    P - His eyes can peer right through you!
    L - And they are PERFECT for his double-takes!
    P - Oh his double takes are GREAT!
    L - You know, I was looking through my paper the other day, because I was SURE that I said SOMETHING about Rowlf's eyes... And I didn't! And I really wish I had, because his double-takes ARE so great with those eyes, but he can also look- and BE- so deep and pensive... It's awesome.
    P - I love Rowlf.
    L - Who doesn't?
    P - I don't know, what kind of question is that?
    L - I was just on the phone for an hour and fifteen minutes, in case you hadn't noticed. How deeply do you expect me to think right now?
    P - *ahem* Sorry.
    L - Thank you. So... Rowlf is freaking awesome. Did we say that yet?
    P - Once or twice, yes.
    L - Oh good. Did we say that he's my roommate?
    P - We have not! We forgot that about poor Robin too!
    L - How do you know? You had your ears plugged the whole time. But yes, we did.
    P - I have my ways...
    L - Oh fine then. Yes, Robin and Rowlf are roomies of mine over in Muppet Central Dorms.
    P - They are?
    L - They are, along with the Swedish Chef, not that anyone would know, for how rarely I show up there.
    P - That's why I was confused.
    L - Yes, well... Meant to frequent there over my break... Haven't yet.
    P - Obviously. Oh well, I don't have much room to talk, I haven't been there much lately either.
    L - Happens. Rowlf actually almost prevented me from joining Dorms to begin with.
    P - Haha, why?
    L - Because he had already been claimed as a roommate, and since Robin had also been taken, I just didn't know with whom to room.
    P - Ohhhh. Well, that's a good reason. Can we move on before we dig ourselves deeper and more people realize we should post there more often?
    L - Yes, why don't we.

    6. The Great Gonzo (The Muppet Show)

    P - Oh, yeah, that helps us move off the topic of Dorms... *ahem* GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONZO!
    L - Now, if Rowlf comes before Gonzo in the calendar, how did Gonzo beat Rowlf on the list? ...Don't make me take the earplugs back.
    P - *bouncy* WHY? WHY did Gonzo beat Rowlf? I'll tell ya why!
    L - Okay, tell.
    L - ...And here I thought you were going to point out that he was a favorite of Jerry Juhl's.
    P - Oh, sure, steal my next idea.
    L - That's what halves are for!
    L - OH! He was in my paper!
    P - *mutters* Stealing my thunder...
    L - On The Muppet Show, a daredevil and performing artiste known as The Great Gonzo performs strange stunts such as eating a tire to the tune of “The Flight of the Bumblebee,” and he occasionally designs his stunts around the design of his blue hook-shaped nose, which is just as unusual as he is.
    P - Nice. I actually sent my friend an MP3 of Gonzo eating the rubber tire to cheer her up.
    L - I have a whole 'nother paragraph.
    P - I saw that coming.
    L - But The Great Gonzo was not always a successful character. Jim Henson originally built him without any particular character traits in mind, and gave him a gloomy expression with half-closed eyes. It was six years before the nameless puppet became The Great Gonzo and needed a personality. During the first year of The Muppet Show, The Great Gonzo’s depressing character was as much of a failure as his acts were. But between seasons, his performer Dave Goelz rebuilt him with a mechanism that allowed him to open his eyes wide with excitement. Throughout the second season, Goelz was able to develop the happy side of Gonzo, who has since become a favorite of the Muppet characters.
    P - Can I go now?
    L - You're the one who has Muppets From Space memorized.
    L - ...<Sweeps up> <Glues Prawnie back together> Go on.
    L - <Puts on earmuffs> And?
    L - Say cheese?
    L - <Giggles> Bombay, India.
    L - <Adjusts earmuffs> Did you mention Camilla yet?
    P - Yes, of course I did. *clears throat* MY WAY! HUGS! TEDDY BEAR! SMASHING A CAR WITH A CROQUET MALLET!
    L - Oh yeah, the teddy bear! I almost forgot about that.
    L - Beg pardon?
    p - Apparently they forgot about the teddy bear too. It never came back. GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONZO!
    L - Ah. Poor teddy bear. ...Hey, you haven't said anything about the change of Gonzo's outfits over the years.
    L - And the chicken tie...
    P - Oh the tie with the hula dancing chicken! LOVE that so much! That was his MFS-era outfit.
    L - Ahhh. OH! Oh I have a comment from the Muppet Treasure Island computer game.
    P - Whip it out!
    L - Yes sir. First of all, one of your chores as "Hawkins" aboard the Hispanola is to load ammunition into a jolly boat... using Gonzo's nose. Also, when you're on the island, trying to avoid the pirates and find the treasure, Gonzo suggests to Rizzo that they create a diversion, so they randomly run around the island and probably don't distract a single pirate, but it's funny!
    P - Hahahaha! Oh that is HILLARIOUS! I love Gonzo. I. Love. GONZO.
    L - So you've mentioned.
    P - Alright, well I'm starting to lose my voice. Should we break it to the folks at home that we're stopping here tonight?
    L - I suppose we should. Folks at home, we're stopping here tonight!
    P - And there you have it. Remember everyone, Gonzo's awesome. Awesome, awesome, AWWWWWWESOME!
    L - But if you were to combine Rowlf and Robin, they would TOTALLY be better.
    P - *mouth drops* ...
    L - What? You disagree? <Folds arms>
    P - I have to disagree! I'm the obsessed Gonzo fan, remember?
    L - Yes, well, I'm the obsessed Robin and Rowlf fan, so... don't make me reach for the frying pan.
    P - Go ahead, I drank some anti-frying pan elixir!
    L - <GLARES> <Whacks Prawnie over the head with a frying pan>
    P - Ha! Didn't work.
    P - ...*falls over*
    L - G'night, folks!
    P - Prawn... knocked... out...
    L - Peace!
    P - Please...
  10. Beauregard

    Beauregard Well-Known Member

    Oh, so now that I'm not online you choose to sign into MSN and chat with your beloved...how rude...I knew I wasn't loved! *wails* And you're supposed to be my Father!

    Nice update!
  11. Pork

    Pork Well-Known Member

    So gald to see Cantus on this List. Great stuff
  12. The Count

    The Count Moderator Staff Member

    Hmm... You think P remembers the interview with Dave Goelz on Muppetcast this last December? Oh well.
    *Moves on waiting for the last five to finally complete this list.
  13. redBoobergurl

    redBoobergurl Well-Known Member

    Great update! I most enjoyed reading your thoughts on Ernie and Bert and on Rowlf because I love those characters so very much, they are of my favorites. Looking forward to what's to come!
  14. TogetherAgain

    TogetherAgain Well-Known Member

    L - But my brain died... I'm thinking in dots... lots and lots of dots that the MC edit-whatcha-ma-thing will edit down to one dot so that it all loses all effectiveness...
    P - C'mooooooooooooon! It's the last FIVE! C'mon, c'mon, c'mon!
    L - Alright, alright... just- don't complain if I start going in a weird combo of German, Hebrew, gibberish, and morse code, okay?
    P - Okay, fine.
    L - Got the list?
    P - Well duh, I am the official holder of the offical list that is absolutely real and not fake we promise.
    L - Of course. I pretend to hold the fake list.
    P - Right. Can I reveal Muppet number 5 now?
    L - Please do.

    5. Klaus Mueller (The Muppet Show)

    L - Gotta love Klaus!
    P - My gosh, I don't know if there's a perfect Muppet, but Klaus is probably the closest thing.
    L - Pretty darn close to the closest, anyway. What makes a Muppet is dedication, and boy, is Klaus dedicated.
    P - My gosh yes. I mean, that hack Fozzie Bear might SEEM dedicated on the outside, but really, Klaus has dedication down to an art. Even Grover, that mediocre monster, doesn't even pale in comparison to Klaus's incredible dedication.
    L - Oh yeah. Klaus knows what it's really about.
    P - He'd be crushed if he wasn't present in the top five of this list.
    L - <Ahem> He certainly would. And we wouldn't want a crushed Klaus, now would we?
    P - No, of course not.
    L - So here he is. Congratulations, Klaus.
    P - Here's to you bright eyes, may your talents forever branch out into the endless tomorrow!

    4. The Geefle (Sesame Street)

    P - I heard that The Geefle was one of Jim Henson's favorite characters that he performed.
    L - Wouldn't surprise me. Where would we be without The Geefle? Well, I don't know, but we probably wouldn't be making this list.
    P - That is the most truthful thing you've ever typed. The Geefle has been an inspiration to Muppet fanatics everywhere. I think it's safe to say that without The Geefle, the Muppets would be a sham.
    L - Here here. (Hear hear? Hear here?) He is certainly one of the greenest Muppets, too.
    P - Yes. It's obvious that it's easy for him being green.
    L - Quite! Anything's easy for him, with the help of a little Shirley.
    P - Sha. The Geefle is quite the spectacle. I believe this is also where Jim came up with the name "Gelfling" for The Dark Crystal. Obviously he wanted to name them after his favorite character.
    L - Well, NATURALLY. Who wouldn't?
    P - Indeed! Well, I feel like if we keep talking we'll bring shame to the Geefle's name (though that is NEARLY impossible) we'd better move on.
    L - On we go!

    3. Anger (The Muppet Show Sex & Violence)

    P - *teary eyed* I don't know if I can do this one. This character just means so much to children everywhere.
    L - I don't know if I can do this one either, for different reasons. Prawnie and I are a little divided on this slot. I still think it should go to Wearing Funny Pants to a Funeral.
    P - *crosses arms* I think our creative differences are going to prevent us from saying anything about this character. Shall we just move on?
    L - <puts hands on hips> Fine!

    2. Miss Mousey (The Muppet Show)

    P - One of the most divine creatures ever to grace the medium of television.
    L - A helpless victim of the pig's jealous wrath, and far more deserving of the pig's glory. I take my hat off to her.
    P - Do you even wear a hat?
    L - Well not anymore. I took it off to Miss Mousey!
    P - As you should! She's a goddess on Earth. I don't think even Aphrodite possessed the striking beauty that belongs to our own Miss Mousey.
    L - And it was about this very Muppet, in a discussion we quite recently had with our third Half, Leyla, that she said, "But I like it!" And if that's not proof of Miss Mousey's wonders, then ladies and gentlemen, I don't know what is.
    P - EXACTLY! Which is why, we're moving on to our final Muppet on the countdown. Oh, I can barely contain my excitement!
    L - I know, I know! I could just explode!
    P - *explodes*
    L - Yeah, kinda like that. <Sweeps up Prawnie pieces and glues them together>

    1. Kermit the Pig (The Muppet Show)

    P - My gosh... he truly started it all. *salutes him*
    L - I know. I know. The purest image of what a fully-grown fig looks like.
    P - Was there any doubt, really, that he'd be number one?
    L - I should hope not. I mean, he is just that good. Who else could possibly be in this place?
    P - No FROG, that's for sure.
    L - Pft! Frog, shmog!
    P - We want PIGS! Not frogs. Which is why, ladies and gentlemen, Kermit the Pig IS the greatest Muppet.
    L - Aye. It's as simple as that.
    P - Well, I think we've beat the tar our of this list, shall we let it sink into the readers?
    L - Well, gee, I'd hate to see this end, y'know? It's been so much fun making this list, and all of our comments...
    P - Yeah... but... well, it's gotta end sometime.
    L - <Sigh> I suppose. Alright, then. Thanks for all of your support, gentle readers!
    P - Thanks a lot! Sorry if your favorite Muppet didn't make the list! But, hey, mine did!
    L - So did mine! And hey, it's our list, so... Yeah. So there.
    P - Fare thee well! Prawn out!
    L - Shalom and adieu!
  15. theprawncracker

    theprawncracker Well-Known Member

    L - Y'know, Prawnie... Something doesn't seem right.
    P - I got that feeling too... you're sure YOU were the one holding the fake list, right?
    L - I think so... WAIT a second... Whose computer crashed, yours or mine?
    P - Umm... didn't they both crash?
    L - ...Okay, let's put it this way. Whose hard drive got wiped?
    P - Yours?
    L - I thought I got a new motherboard... Or was that you?
    P - That was... you.
    L - Then YOU'RE the one who lost a bunch of files... I think?
    P - Umm... well I did... but I still have... wait, what?
    L - ...Hang on, I found my list. Lemme see yours...
    P - *gives Lisa list*
    L - ...I don't know. One of these is the Final Five, and one of these is the False Five, but... Maybe we should post this one, too, just to cover all our bases?
    P - Lisa, why are we so mean to these poor people? They are our READERS.
    L - You're talking to the girl who kills innocent characters at the expense of her readers. You expect me to be NICE to these poor people?
    P - *puppy dog eyes*
    L - ...Whatever. Let's just post the other list. ...Where'd we put it?
    P - You have it!
    L - ...Um...
    P - Oh good grief... Well, I'll just post this post and we'll look for it, o-KAY?
    L - Fine, sure, I guess... Lemme look in my shoe real quick...
    P - Good grief... we'll be back in a little bit, folks...
    L - Or is it in my coat...
    P - *rolls eyes*
  16. Leyla

    Leyla Well-Known Member

    Well! There we have it! The great list of... oh.

    Speaking of beating the tar out of things that deserve having the tar beaten out of them...

    Speaking of Anger...

    Speaking of... whoever those other two guys are...

    I have to dicipline a couple of halves. Excuse me... Okay... Prawnie... you're reading every single one of my stories... YOU know the ones... and Lisa... You...have to write me an 80 page essay on filthly lies without once mention anything muppet related.

    Get cracking, before I tell PIggy what you said about Miss Mousy!

    Edit: Oh! Looks like they're getting confused again. I'll fix that too, since I'm cleaning house. C'mere you two... I've got my microchip tagging guns. You won't be able to sit down for a while, so be warned...
  17. The Count

    The Count Moderator Staff Member

    *Ahem... Will miss Layla please pick up the white courtesy fanfic? You have a Kermie's Girl chapter awaiting long review.

    As for the halves... Not to worry, we're cooking the prawn for dinner withpeppers and salt and all the fixings over at the Kiss Kiss Hug Hug thread. Lisa, get to posting the real list or we'll have to step in and confiscate your minds.
  18. Leyla

    Leyla Well-Known Member

    Oh, thanks for the reminder, Ed dear, but I gushed at her on MSN. One of these days, you'll miss me Kermit... er... I mean, I'll get caught up on all these missing reviews!
  19. The Count

    The Count Moderator Staff Member

    Well... So long as you've already read and replied to it, that's the important thing. BTW: Congrats on getting to 500 and hugs to you and your fluffy little Leppit.
  20. Leyla

    Leyla Well-Known Member

    Oh! And hugs back to you too! I did get to 500 at least! Only took me two years. Thanks, dear! C'mon, halves... get going! I'm sleepy!

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